After months of theorizing that 5G was the cause of a various amount of American daily pains, including the ongoing pandemic, 5G conspiracy theorists have decided they aren’t going to stand by and let their lives be stolen from them, dangit.
But the action they’re taking is causing them a different kind of pain: the agony of inconvenience.
Someone on Amazon is making money off 5G conspiracy theorists by selling a $90 "EMF blocker" for WiFi routers. The best part is the reviews complaining that it reduced their WiFi signal 🤣 pic.twitter.com/xCXIYLSSAa
— MalwareTech (@MalwareTechBlog) November 30, 2020
These cage-like devices, which are made to block electromagnetic frequencies, go over your WiFi router and reportedly “block 5G.”
But since the EMF blocker does its job correctly, it also significantly reduces the WiFi signal one can pick up from the device.
This is hilarious in so many ways, not the least being that it clearly costs AT MOST $2 to make.
— Katie Mack (@AstroKatie) November 30, 2020
Yoo when I say I'm screaming 💀 pic.twitter.com/j50gvmtcsk
— Lila Ike stan account. (@Melziibaby) November 30, 2020
If 2020 has done anything positive it’s to clearly bring up to light how stupid conspiracy theories are. And to confirm the fake quote of Einstein that stupidity has no limit
— Daniel Silva (@volterinator) November 30, 2020
i find myself lacking a good "the stupid: it burns" gif
— D̒͂̕ᵈăᵃn̕ᶰ Ť̾̾̓͐͒͠ᵗe͗̑́̋̂́͡ᵉn̅ᶰtᵗl̀̓͘ᶫe̓̒̂̚ᵉrʳ (@Viss) November 30, 2020
Jesus. They’re making stupid money off these too. pic.twitter.com/nTvyRwKYBc
— The 🇨🇦 Canad-Ian Nerd 🇺🇸 (@CaNerdIan) November 30, 2020
One one-star review in particular reads:
“The box does work at keeping radiation in but also WiFi will not work unless your in same room as router! It decreases the signal by 90%!! We really wanted to like it but it was impossible to use our phones in any other room of the house. Also the seller keeps the shipping fee $25 so that was annoying”
And apparently anti-EMF products have a market.
One Twitter user got a really informative, yet outlandish ad:
Ad I got on youtube few days ago. pic.twitter.com/dD8Uwf90PN
— El Rey (@Snoopie509) November 30, 2020
And yet more users are sharing their odd stories of how conspiracy theorists are harnessing their anti-EMF products:
someone i follow on ig sleeps in a faraday cage at night which is pretty cool regardless of how crazy it is
— nick in the bando ☃️ (@wasolop12) November 30, 2020
Working at Apple at the GB, we had a guy come in about once a week because his internet didn’t work. He always told us he couldn’t use Wi-if In his house because his wife was allergic. She could use one.
— Mtenz (@crazytenz) November 30, 2020
If you can't change their opinion, change their financial situation. They will come around to changing their opinions 😂😂😂
— Subrahmanyam KVJ (@SuB8u) December 2, 2020
somebody tells to sell one of these for the head pic.twitter.com/UNqv5XOnUf
— Kevin Beaumont (@GossiTheDog) November 30, 2020
Keeping these people off the internet is a public service. They should make it out of thick plastic and so it can't be opened after it's closed.
— NoBigGovDuh (@NoBigGovDuh) November 30, 2020
Yet another product contains a similar review:
“Devices that were previously located about 30-40’ from the router that used to have full signal strength, don’t even connect to it anymore…”
“I had to remove the cage from the router and now the return window has closed so I’m stuck with this useless $100+ metal cage now… Will try and sell it on Craigslist.”
Who knew that a product designed to block a WiFi signal would indeed block a WiFi signal?
I've just bought a 5G phone do I need a helmet shaped one?
— Donal (@GrumpyOldDoc) November 30, 2020
I wish I'd thought of this. It's not technically fraud and it won't hurt people.
— Silence of the Labs (@resistredaction) December 2, 2020
It's a whole industry.
These people believe your body needs to be grounded so the earth can recharge you.https://t.co/I7jlexLaPF
— Tamara Roberson 🏳️🌈 (@TamaraZRoberson) November 30, 2020
I too sell metal waste baskets hot glued on to gutters and sell them as 5G protectors for the home. I'm worth more than Warren Buffet at this point.
— Michael "Oh well" Howell (@ItsOhWell) December 3, 2020
— Nedim F (@nedimcodes) December 1, 2020
The theory that 5G is actively harmful to humans has been debunked more than once, but science apparently doesn’t sell products: more than 21 different kinds of “5G blockers” are on Amazon.com alone, and 5G-blocking clothing is now also an option.
At least you know what to get the conspiracy theorist in your life for the holidays!