Listen, if you read that headline and still don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, I’d suggest turning back now. This story starts weird and gets weirder.
At the top of the list of worst fears for anyone still living with their parents or grandparents, it would have to be them finding your sex toys. I can’t say if it’d be worse if they knew what those sex toys were, or if they had no idea.
While you might think that if they had no idea, it might be easier to lie and re-hide them, you aren’t assuming they decide to use them for themselves.
A man went viral on Twitter after sharing his grandma wearing his sex toys as socks.
お婆ちゃん、嘘だと言ってくれ… pic.twitter.com/ae2CPPjRDQ— アナルガバガバキャバオ (@analKABAO) July 5, 2019
You read that right.
You saw what those things are in the video. Those are the inners for a sex toy.
You might know of a similar product called a “fleshlight”, though as I learned in my research, it’s part of a whole line of products called an “onahole”.
In the video Twitter user @analKABAO goes up to his grandmother, who is wearing the offending items on her feet.
“Grandma, what are you wearing?”
Yes, she thought the sex toys were actually thermal socks.
I saw it now you gotta suffer with me.. https://t.co/2cg5U5zY36— Anthony Quoc Vu (@anthonyquocvu) July 11, 2019
SO HIS GRANDMA MISTAKED HIS FLESHLIGHT AS SOCKS. SKSKSKSKSKSKS OH NO. https://t.co/OIqPez9HlZ— chy (@SpazzMuffins) July 11, 2019
Grooooossssss... https://t.co/27pnlUO5hi— Libertine (@dockock8279) July 10, 2019
On one hand, I can absolutely imagine his grandmother not knowing what the sex toys were. The sight of a fleshlight is not easily recognizable to someone who doesn’t know what they are.
On the other hand, why would she wear them on her feet? If you found random pink rubber things, would thermal socks really be your first thought?
While this feels like the kind of thing that’s too weird to be made up, I have to ask if this is made up.
In a follow up video, the grandson tries to help his grandmother take them off. They have a little trouble, but eventually free her feet.
21歳になって、お婆ちゃんの足からオナホール抜くことになるとは思わなかった… pic.twitter.com/cIhELB6HPU— アナルガバガバキャバオ (@analKABAO) July 5, 2019
Obviously, the young man can’t use the items anymore. He has offered to sell them to anyone who would buy them online.
Which, you know, gross.
This is really just too much.
Omg! I am literally trying NOTt to tag someone right now because I can see this happening at his house. https://t.co/GPmMV0TpU8— Niraj Joshi (@NirajJoshi) July 11, 2019
Translate this and cackle https://t.co/DBnhIDVti1— Kittie (@KittieHill) July 10, 2019
The dreaded sex toy scenarios:— He Took Away My Rhys Card (@MorteAmore) July 10, 2019
1. Pet finds sex toy and thinks it's a chew toy
2. Young child finds sex toy and finds it hilarious. Also thinks it's for bludgeoning people
3. Parents find exotic sex toy, question the exoticness
Some grandparents did not grow up in this brave new world. It’s not only sex toys that confuse them either.
Remember that grandma who thought a Steve Harvey gif was going to ruin her phone?
After all of this, all I can really recommend is keeping your sex toys well hidden.
And if you find something weird like this in your adult child/grandchild/roommate’s room?
Best if you just leave it alone.
The structured journal Sharing Stories, Making Memories: A Journal for Grandparents and Grandchildren is available here to save all your treasured memories.
Whatever they may be.