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Church’s Accidentally Sexual Stained-Glass Window Of Mary Holding Jesus Is Pure Sacrilege


Stained-glass windows are typically beautiful works of art. Many even depict other famous works of art and familiar scenes from religious iconography.

But one stained-glass window depicting the Pietà—a work of Renaissance sculpture by Michelangelo housed in St. Peter’s Basilica, Vatican City, Rome—is raising eyebrows for its inadvertent NSFW nature. The stained-glass window was shared on Twitter from a photo taken at an unspecified church.

Here’s the sculpture the window is based on.

Twitter user Rosievix (@Rosievix)—self described as “Looking for a road less travelled & sharing funnies”—shared the stained-glass window that caught her eye and asked followers to enlighten her.

She doesn’t explain where the photo came from originally. But it appears the Son of God gained a little something left out of Michelangelo’s original design.

Rosievix asked:

“What, exactly…, is Mary holding?? 😳

Oh myyy…

It’s not surprising that the responses Rosievix received were more than a handful.


Many people interpreted the stained-glass rendering as Mary holding Jesus in a way that was inappropriate.

At a glance, it appears Mary has a secure grip on his….


Let’s just say, “weenie.”

The original artist may have attempted to represent a shadow or musculature in part of Jesus’ thigh and failed miserably.

Or are we being too naïve about the artist’s virtuous intentions?

You decide.

Twitter users gave in to temptation and reverted back to grade school humor with dirty comments. And now we’re all going to hell in a hand basket for laughing.

Several of the bon mots focused on a few features from the life of Christ, like…


…and also…

While others just offered guesses for what exactly that portion of the Body of Christ was.

And one person offered this observation…

While someone else noticed this…

How the near-blasphemous work of art managed to slip under the radar is confounding.

And yet, another stained-glass window featuring Jesus and John the Baptist…

Giggling parishioners during a sermon inside these hallowed walls must have a hard time getting a grip.


God bless them.

Christian Cathedrals Stained Glass Coloring Book: For Adults and Children including Bible Themes, Rose Windows, Gothic and Floral Designs from the Medieval and Renaissance to Modern Eras is available here.

Koh Mochizuki

Written by Koh Mochizuki

Koh Mochizuki is a New York-based actor and writer. Originally hailing from Los Angeles, he received his B.A. in English literature and is fluent in Japanese. Disney parks are his passion, and endless cups of coffee are a necessity. Instagram: kohster Twitter: @kohster1