Growing up is such an arduous task.
Being a teen means being in a constant state of chaos.
And being the parent isn’t much easier.
All that chaos can lead to a bunch of spilling of emotion and acting out.
On all sides.
Case in point…
Redditor max-the-trash-rat to discuss their story for some feedback. So naturally they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
They asked:
“AITA for yelling at my dad after he dumped the bathroom trashcan out onto my bed?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“So I (16) and my dad (45) have been bickering back and forth over where I need to dispose of my menstrual products.”
“I repeatedly tell him that is what a trashcan in the bathroom is for.”
“He argues that I need to throw them immediately into the kitchen trashcan.”
“I never do this as it is gross and embarrassing.”
“But i always keep the bathroom door closed and I empty the trashcan when it gets too full.”
“I am the only person who closes the door so, the dogs get into the bathroom and bring out a used product into the living room.”
“My solution is to just close the door.”
“My dad was fed up of this today after coming home from work and seeing this (I was currently at work).”
“And decided to dump out the entire bathroom trashcan on my bed.”
“When I came home to see this I got very angry and stormed out of my room and then sorta yelled at him asking why he did it.”
“He got angry at me and called my an a**hole.”
“And normally if I’ve done nothing wrong and my dad yells my mom will defend me, but this time she didn’t.”
“So now I wanted outsider input, AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA?:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors declared our OP was NOT the A**hole.
It’s a tricky situation.
Let’s hear some thoughts…
“NTA. Your dad is definitely TA here.”
“If he has such a problem with seeing used feminine hygiene products, he could have bought a trash can with a lid.” ~ ExpelliarmusSimp
“We had a dog that would wreck -that- trash can.”
“Sometimes my dad would find all of the gross remnants of pads and tampons in the hallway.”
“He would just come and let one of us know it happened and we obviously would go clean it up as fast as possible.”
“He was just as uncomfortable about telling us as we were about the the dog getting into everything. It was mutually awkward but he never -ever- shamed us for any of it.” ~ atreethatownsitself
“I would like to add that the mother is an AH as well.”
“What is wrong with these people?”
“OP, I think it’s time for ‘malicious compliance.'”
“Maybe next time take a walk proudly and make it obvious to everyone that you are throwing your used menstrual products in the kitchen trash bin.”
“I would do it with guests there as well!”
“You could also get a small trash bin in your own room, but they are assholes for doing this.”
“What is everyone using the bathroom trash bin for??” ~ No-Bottle63
“Dad is a massive AH.”
“What’s with so many dads being weirded out by their daughter’s periods.”
“It’s honestly just so upsetting to see, I couldn’t imagine my dad being like this because of something I can’t control.”
“So sad to see how many sexist dads there is out there who can’t even get over their uncomfortableness for their daughters.”
“It’s actually pathetic.” ~ alaynamul
“OP is NTA but I wonder if there is a valid issue (smell, how they are disposed of, or the animals).”
“Trash can with lid solves most reasonable concerns.”
“That’s probably not the case but the part where she mentioned her mom made me think about that.”
“Either way, the response was childish and a gross overreaction.” ~ AprilBLH
“I’m just wondering…”
“How is OP embarrassed by their sanitary products but then is leaving them uncovered?”
“A tampon on a string will quickly swing around and get blood on everything.”
“Is it not considered a normal procedure to wrap a tampon up in toilet paper/roll a pad up so that it keeps itself closed?”
“That seems like a simple solution that would solve some of these issues: and is the best solution when at someones house where they don’t have a bin in the toilet.”
“I’ve never been to kick-ons at a males house where they have had a bin and I’ll be damned if I’m walking through the main area holding a bloody tampon or pad.”
“And yes, it’s a period and there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“But we as a society don’t leave soiled bandages out where people can see them, for one, yes, it doesn’t look pleasant but for two it’s not hygienic?”
“The sanitary products keep you sanitary because they absorb the unsanitary fluids and you should be treating such waste in a clinical manner.”
“110% NTA that is some crazy shit from your father for pouring such waste onto your bed.”
“That’s so disrespectful and I am sorry that you’re experiencing that.” ~ thegoldilocks_zone
“I can’t tell about the whole world but here (where I am) many of the pad brands pack them in individual, resealable paper wrappers and then in a package of ‘N pieces.'”
“And encourage the customers to wrap the used pad into a sort of scroll and then into the wrapper.”
“I imagine doing this would sort out possible dripping.”
“I wrap the used product in a wrapper and then dispose of it in a bathroom trash, a smaller bin with a lid, lined with a plastic bag – because it’s RIGHT THERE!”
“NTA OP!” ~ ignia
“Try to think through what the procedure would be.”
“If you had to finish up your bathroom business and then carry a used menstrual product to a different room.”
“Do you leave the product on the floor, wrapped in toilet paper while you finish up?”
“Do you wash your hands after you’re done wiping, only to re-contaminate them by picking up the used tampon again?”
“How many doorknobs and light switches do you touch on your way from the bathroom to the kitchen?”
“What if it drips?”
“After you’ve disposed of it, do you then wash your hands in the kitchen sink?
“After which you’d probably have to wipe down the sink.”
“Or do you walk all the way back to the bathroom?”
“Gross all around.” ~ So_Motarded
“Like, she’s definitely NTA .”
“But I imagine the argument is ‘the dogs can’t get into that bin and drag your tampons all over the house’ not ‘I don’t want to acknowledge your period exists so you can’t use the bathroom bin?'”
“And possibly the household doesn’t close the bathroom door as a sign that it’s not occupied.”
“The entire thing could be solved by getting a sturdy enough bin with a lid.” ~ functionallyterrible
“My mother asked me to do this when I was a teen.”
“I was putting them in my bedroom waste basket and she was afraid our dog would get into it.”
“My mom was normally reasonable.”
“But her rule ensured that I had to bring my wrapped pads down to the kitchen trash and try to not let my father or brothers see what I was doing.”
“OP is NTA, and should look to getting a can with a locking lid for her room.” ~ This-Ad-2281
“I had never lived with dogs until moving in with my partner ~8 yrs ago, and it was SO GROSS to come home to my used tampons scattered all over the living room.”
“Dogs will do dog things.”
“Sometimes us humans have to just remove temptation so we can all coexist as harmoniously as possible.”
“OP a small trash can with a lid is a great solution and might cost around $15 max.”
“The one I got has a foot pedal and also a removable bin-within-a-bin that I line with a regular plastic shopping bag and replace as needed (once a week or so).”
“If your parents won’t help out with this feel free to PM me.”
“I’d be happy to amazon one to your house. Totally NTA.” ~ diamondsDear4u
“NTA If the dogs keep fishing the menstrual products out of the trashcan, your dad should just buy a new one.”
“Maybe one, that dogs can’t open up.”
“He could also just learn to close the bathroom door if that isn’t too much for him to handle.”
“You should be able to throw away your products in a private area and not have to walk to the kitchen to dispose of them.”
He has no right to be mad or to empty a trashcan on your bed.” ~ shes-got-arthritis
“You are NTA.”
“No one I know dumps used feminine hygiene products in the KITCHEN trash can.”
“A trash can with a lid that closes so that the dog cannot get into it is the solution.”
“Dad the A**hole didn’t think of this solution.”
“Instead, he dumps them on the bed of a 16-year old child!”
“Mom and dad are the AHs.”
“Either of them could’ve bought a sturdy, closing can for the bathroom, and keep the door closed.”
“The dog should not be able to open the bathroom door by pushing on it hard either, again on the parents to provide all of these.” ~ Kanagu1
Sorry this is happening OP.
Reddit certainly has some valid suggestions and support for you.
Maybe talk to mom first and then take on dad together.
Good luck.