Many people love their pets as much as they love their children.

As well they should, as pets require a lot of love and attention.

Indeed, some people would rather have pets than children, which is perfectly admirable, as their pets would want for nothing.

However, at the end of the day, pets are not children, and not everyone is so understanding of those who treat their pets like children.

The brother of Redditor otter-grain had a dog whom he loved more than anything.

So much so, he would bring it pretty much everywhere he went.

However, following an unfortunate incident, the original poster (OP) banned her brother from ever bringing his dog back to her home.

After being accused of being "dramatic" by her brother, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**Hole" (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:

"AITA for telling my brother he can't bring his dog to my apartment anymore after one incident?"

The OP explained why her brother's dog was no longer welcome in her home:

"I (29 F[emale]) live alone in a one-bedroom apartment, and I have two cats, Miso and Fig, both rescues, both pretty anxious by nature."

"My brother Dan (34 M[ale]) has a Labrador named Biscuit who is genuinely a sweet dog, I want to be clear about that."

"But he is large, he is loud, and he has a lot of energy."

"Every time Dan has brought him over in the past, I've made it work by keeping the cats in the bedroom, which they hate, but it was manageable."

"Two months ago, Dan asked if he could come over, and I said yes, assuming Biscuit wasn't coming because we hadn't talked about it."

"He showed up with the dog. Before I could even get the cats into the bedroom, Biscuit had cornered Fig behind the couch and was barking directly at her face."

"Fig has not been the same since."

"She stopped eating normally for almost two weeks, she startled at everything, she hid constantly."

"The vet said she was showing signs of stress, and we've been slowly getting her back to baseline."

"I told Dan after that that Biscuit can't come to my place anymore."

"Not forever, I said, just until Fig is doing better, and even then we'd have to do a very slow and careful introduction."

"He thinks I'm being dramatic and that 'it was one bark' and dogs and cats work these things out."

"He's annoyed with me and mentioned it to our parents, who are now involved, which I did not ask for."

"My mom thinks I should 'just get the cats used to dogs' as if that's a thing you can demand of an anxious rescue animal on a timeline."

"AITA for holding this boundary even though it's causing family drama?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

The Reddit community was in agreement that the OP was not the a**hole for banning her brother from bringing her dog to her home.

Everyone agreed that not only was the OP more than valid in taking her cats into consideration, but also agreed the OP's brother should not feel so entitled as to bring his dog everywhere he goes to begin with:

"NTA."

"Why does he bring the dog every time anyway?"

"This is such a weird issue to have."

"Your brother can kick rocks and your mom's point has zero relevance."

"Your cats have no reason to get used to dogs."

"People shouldn't randomly be bringing their dogs over."

"Who the hell brings their dog to a one-bedroom apartment for a visit?"- DemonicSnow

"NTA."

"Why do people feel so entitled to bring their pets with them to other people's homes?"

"I get it, they are family, but the brother has no ground to stand on here."

"OP, your home, so your rules."

"You have handled it exactly as I personally would have, although I've never had anyone do such a selfish act."- Ok-Practice838

"You are responsible for your cat."

"Fig has literally no one else looking out for him."

"NTA unless you give in to the brother's pressure."- feliniaCR

"NTA."

"Why on earth does your brother think he gets to tell you what's ok in your house, and also that dragging your parents into it is appropriate?"

"I'd ban his butt from my house too."

"Let's meet at the dog park, bro."- SadderOlderWiser

"NTA."

"It's the cats' house too; they deserve to feel safe and comfortable."

"I don't understand why some dog owners are so entitled about their dog's behavior."

"Your brother is for sure being an AH about this."- small-black-cat-290

"NTA."

"Um…you are both adults living on your own; why is your brother running to mommy?"

"And why is she weighing in?"- Kindly_Jellyfish_451

"NTA."

"Your brother is not more entitled to comfort in your home than you are, and his dog is not more entitled to comfort in your cat's home than your cat is."

"Your home, your rules."

"If your brother can't leave his dog at home, you can meet elsewhere."- peakerforlife

"NTA your brother is selfish and is a poor dog owner."

"Dogs should be trained not to run up to and bark at other people and animals."

"Your parents are also demonstrating clearly who their golden child is; sorry, it's not you."- OK_LK

"NTA, absolutely unhinged behavior to bring a large dog to a cat's home with no warning."

"It is simply not done."- expanding_crystal

"NTA I am a dog lover, but how and why are we at a point as a society where people feel the need to bring their dogs positively everywhere?!?! "

"If your brother can't be away from his dog, then you should go to his place to visit going forward."

"As for your parents, unless they're paying your rent, their opinion on your brother's dog being in your apartment is irrelevant."- Consistent-Leopard71

"NTA."

"Why do people bring their pets with them everywhere?"

"The dog is disruptive to your home and your pets."

"Biscuit can stay at home."- DoobieDoo0718

"NTA."

"Nobody should ever bring an animal to someone's house without confirming without receiving confirmation that it is ok to bring the animal."

"Showing up and expecting the animal to be let inside is ridiculous."- jstar77

"Not just 'until fig is doing better' but until your brother learns he needs to communicate ASKING if his dog can come over and goes through training his dog to be less... nutty around cats."

"Pretty simple stuff, really."

"It's not just that the cats need to get used to dogs; the dog has to be used to being around cats and not just zooming up and barking as much as possible in their faces."

"This is coming from someone who's had a cat in a dog filled household, we made sure they were introduced properly and without any forms of aggression."

"NTA far from it."

"Your brother is one for not asking beforehand and not taking the time to train his dog."-DescriptionNo4833

"NTA, but the 34-yr-old who went crying to mommy and daddy sure is."- onlyIcancallmethat

"NTA."

"Completely your call, you get to decide what's healthy for your pets just like you would for your kids."

"Plenty of people would flat out refuse to have dogs come to visit inside the house where they have cats, you made efforts to accommodate and it didn't work, so saying that Biscuit can't come inside any more is both your absolute right and highly understandable."- BanterPhobic

"NTA."

"I don't want anyone bringing their dogs to my house."

"I don't want dog mess all over the place, and the house is my cats' territory, not some strange dogs' territory, and they come first."

"Leave your dog at home."- maybe-an-ai

"Cats that get stressed can develop FIC/FLUTD, which can cause urinary blockages in males."

"Also, even without that risk, any animal should be able to feel safe in their. Own. Freaking. Home."

"Your brother is entitled."

"NTA."- Armadillo_of_doom

"NTA."

"I truly do not understand people who believe they need to bring their dog with them EVERYWHERE."

"Just because you love your dog doesn't mean that they are welcome everywhere you go."

"There is nothing wrong with telling Dan he needs to leave the dog at home when he visits you."

"Or if he is unable to follow that rule, meet him at a coffee shop or restaurant for visits and just don't have him over to your house."- dragonsandvamps

It seems the OP's brother has forgotten that, whenever he visits his sister, he is a guest and must abide by her rules. Something one would think the OP's parents would have agreed with as well.

Perhaps the OP should consider how he would feel if another pet attacked his dog, and how eager he would be to welcome them back into his home...

The OP's behavior might not seem so "dramatic" after that...

Home security is a billion-dollar industry.

The strides that have been made in security equipment are astounding.

Anyone and anything can be surveyed from anywhere at anytime.

It's an incredible feat for many; for others, it can be a hostile invasion of privacy.

Not all home monitoring is appreciated.

Redditor VictorSponge wanted to discuss his experience and get some feedback, so naturally, he came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

He asked:

"AITA for my productivity/behaviour becoming affected after my friend installed home security cameras?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"I (24 M[ale]) moved into my good friend's (39 M) house, and we've been living together for 3 years."

"We're not partners."

"I don't work on account of a stressful degree, but the house is paid off, and he makes enough for bills, so I buy groceries, do chores/cook, so I'm home often when not in class."

"2 years ago, he bought a doorbell camera and security cameras for the sides and back of the house, plus window/door sensors for security and to monitor his dog, who sometimes escapes the yard. Fine."

"But soon after, he wanted security cameras in the house."

"He claimed it was to monitor the dog's mischief."

"They'd be in the entryway, living room, and hallway (which points at our bedrooms and bathroom)."

"I said I was opposed."

"I didn't see the point of internal cameras when the outside was covered already."

"He said he'd give me access to the app, buy cameras with lids, and allow me to close the lids (which, to be fair, he did), but I still didn't agree."

"I didn't want to have to worry about my privacy being accessible in a hackable app."

"But he went ahead and got them anyway."

"The dog was often of little interest on camera as he milled about, so with the lack of activity, the cameras had a different benefit."

"A text right as I left the house: 'Why are you just now leaving? You should go to the store earlier.'"

"At dinner: 'Why didn't you get downstairs until 11? You were supposed to feed the dog at 10."'

"I would say something funny happened with the dog while he was working: 'I know, I saw."'

"If he texted with no immediate answer, I'd hear from a camera loudspeaker: 'Why are you not answering?"'

"Sometimes he posted funny things of the dog on the cameras to his Insta story, but a few times it's something 'funny' of ME on camera."

"I'd ask him to remove it, and though he did, he didn't understand what the big deal was."

"I'd close camera lids, but because he gets upset if I don't open them before bed, I'd mostly leave them open to avoid the scolding if I forgot."

"The house feels less like home and more like 'The Truman Show' sometimes, often leading me to avoid tasks as I feel I can't do anything without the fear of surveillance."

"I'll admit there are some things I should've been doing at home that I was pushing to a later date/time or forgetting."

"Still, I feel using the cameras for receipts is overstepping some kind of privacy boundary."

"Fear of being watched is so ingrained now, I catch myself sometimes unable to relax in the house or reflexively checking for a camera in my room before undressing."

"My friend says the cameras are harmless, that I should just get things done properly if I don't want to be monitored or called out by him."

"But I still feel this only causes me paranoia and frames my task struggling as my fault for what I feel was (and still is) an invasion of my privacy."

The OP was left to wonder:

"AITA for surveillance anxiety affecting my productivity/behavior?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question, AITA:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"NTA, but you have to get out."

"He is creepy and controlling." ~ unsafeideas

"Agreed. We put in a rather elaborate alarm system in our house, and when I discussed with the designer and security company about an interior cam on one particularly valuable area of the house, they said, 'Nope.'"

"Don't do it."

"You'll have issues with friends and family (and renters if we ever rented the house) if they know we have interior cam/s and it's an even BIGGER problem if it's not disclosed."

"That this person not only did this, but ALSO has clearly done it to be Big Brother, you gotta get out of there, unless you can get them to realize it's not cool and change their ways."

"Not optimistic about that, though, from what you wrote." ~ jeremyjava

"NTA, yes, you are living there for free, yes, it's his right to have cameras, but this is not a legal sub."

"It's AITA."

"This dude is being an AH."

"Y'all really think it's ok for him to post video footage of OP online?"

"What The Heck is wrong with all of you?"

"Yes, OP should move out if they don't like it."

"Doesn't mean this guy isn't a TOTAL creep." ~ Proper_Hunter_9641

"Roomie posting videos of OP online was what made me change my verdict to NTA."

"That is a HUGE invasion of privacy."

"I have indoor cameras to monitor my pets, and I rarely access them when my own HUSBAND is home because that's just creepy and invasive."

"Also, if someone is home, then the pets are being monitored." ~ Hippopotapus*y

"NTA, but set alarms to close the cameras in the morning and open them before bed." ~ IcePrincess_Not_Sk8r

"He's getting weary of the arrangement, and this is a way to try to get you to do your part more consistently or move on."

"He doesn't want to be hostile, and he's probably enjoyed the energy of a younger person in their 20s since he's almost 40."

"But he's getting tired of the situation, and instead of dealing with it directly in a conversation, the cameras are a way to push more subtly to get you to do your part."

"He's beginning to feel taken advantage of."

"But he should never be posting anything online with you in it without your explicit agreement." ~ TigerWalkingThru

"What the hell is wrong with this comments section?!"

"NTA, this is pretty much a pressure cooker for some intense mental health problems."

"Get out NOW, bestie." ~ RushBest5348

"Ohh my god OP I'm worried for you."

"It sounds like this man befriended you intentionally because you are young and in a vulnerable position, and now that you are reliant on him, he is tightening his control."

"This situation is really weird and f**ked up, and the fact that you weren't even sure whether or not he was in the wrong shows that he has already been grooming you."

"If you have a supportive family, you would be way better off moving back in with them right away, dont stay in this situation a moment longer." ~ imjustapersontoo

"NTA. I don't think you're an a**hole for not liking the cameras, and he's not an a**hole for preferring them."

"He is an a**hole for posting security camera footage of you on Instagram."

"He is an a**hole for using the camera speakers to scold you for not responding to his texts."

"He is an a**hole for using the camera to police when you do activities like shopping." ~ agreywood

"NTA. This is just weird and creepy."

"If he wants you to do more around the house, if he wants you to move out, if he wants you to... he should use his words like an adult."

"Posting clips of you online from the indoor security cameras he monitors you with is extremely freaking weird behavior." ~ Leek-Middle

"NTA. If he doesn't get why this is invasive and creepy, he probably won't be convinced that it's invasive and creepy."

"Time to find a different living situation." ~ CaptainSneakers

"Uhhhh NTA."

"That's weird as f**k and super controlling."

"It's time to find a new place to live."

"ETA: Paying rent or not, people still deserve not to be monitored 24/7."

"It's weird, even if OP is free-loading."

"And if it's a way for the homeowner to drive him out, the guy is still TA for not just growing up and saying something."

"Texting somebody about their activities in the home is f**king WEIRD and inappropriate, regardless of what somebody is or isn't paying."

"And it's EXTRA inappropriate (and possibly illegal depending on local laws) to post it online."

"OP is NTA."

"Not paying rent doesn't mean he should be treated any way and dealt with it." ~ SnooChipmunks770

"NTA, but you need a new living situation."

"This one is not going to improve." ~ ChickenCasagrande

"NTA. You are entitled to privacy while you are living there, even if you don't own the home."

"Whether you're a tenant, a houseguest, or a partner, you deserve not to be micromanaged remotely by a 'friend.'"

"He says they are harmless, but they are harming YOU."

"I know it's tough because you don't have income, but you may have to explore a different living situation." ~ diduknowtrex

"Oh wow, I was so prepared to be against you based on the title and first few paragraphs — but nope, NTA."

"I mean, yes, he has the right to do what he wants in his home, especially if you're not paying rent, and the solution if you don't like it is to move."

"But that doesn't change the fact that this is incredibly creepy, invasive, weird, and assholish behavior."

"It would be a dealbreaker for me, and I would move." ~ ConflictGullible392

"NTA My take is that after several years, he is getting annoyed when you don't do your part on time, he's getting fed up with it, and wants a way to bug you in the moment to get things done."

"I sense he is feeling taken for granted."

"Be more prompt and vigilant about doing your part and see if this lightens up re the cams."

"If not, have a heart-to-heart convo about expectations."

"You've been living there since age 21 without paying anything."

"That's a big help when you're studying, but to keep the peace, you've got to be consistent with your part."

"That said, the indoor cams are obnoxious, and I think this is more from irritation than watching the dog's antics." ~ TigerWalkingThru

Reddit has your back, OP.

This is an outrageous breach of your privacy and your security.

Reddit had a lot of good options.

It may be time to look for another place to live.

This has to be illegal as well.

Good Luck.

One of the great things about having a small dog is that they can be pee pad trained.

This can be very helpful when the weather is the enemy.

A lot of owners don't have to stand in the rain and snow, or get up in the middle of the night.

This can be a pet owner's luxury.

However, some pet owners may take this luxury a step too far for the rest of the general public's liking.

Redditor No-Song-4931 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback, so naturally, they came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

They asked:

"AITA for telling a lady that putting a pee pad down for her dog inside the mall, that that's disgusting and not okay?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"I was walking through the (indoor) mall when I saw a woman putting a pee pad down for her dog right in the main hallway."

"I asked if she was serious, and she smiled and said yes."

"I said that's disgusting, and she started waving around the unused (yet) pad, saying it's fine."

"I insisted, no, it's disgusting."

"For the record, I have a small dog that's pee pad trained only, so I understand the function of the pads."

"I would also never bring my dog inside a mall, grocery store, or restaurant."

"I'm just wondering where the majority stands on this."

The OP was left to wonder:

"So... AITA? Or is she"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"People who have to take their dogs everywhere are automatically a**holes."

"Learn to function in society. NTA." ~ almaperdida99

"Thank you!!!"

"In reality, most people just want a pet and to be able to bring it EVERYWHERE with them."

"These E[motional] S[ecurity] A[nimals] aren't trained service dogs, and bite and nip at people."

"The vast majority, and no, I don't care if your animal is a calm, chill animal and has never nipped or bit anyone."

"You haven't gotten extensive training, so you don't know what your dog will do if it gets territorial or scared."

"Let's not mention people who have a pet dander allergy." ~ jjrobinson73

"NTA. Some of you cannot be f*cking serious in these comments."

"I love dogs as much as the next person, but letting your dog pee inside the mall instead of just going outside is so f*cking nasty."

"Your dog shouldn't even be at the mall unless it's a disability aid."

"We don't let service animals pee inside."

"That lady needed to be called out." ~ bitter-scorpio-02

"I once saw a man with a little dog on a leash inside a mall."

"The man was walking ahead of the dog, paying absolutely no attention to what it was doing."

"Plus, the leash had quite a bit of leeway, so he could get a bit far from the dog before he felt it tug in a different direction."

"This little dog then proceeds to pee on the column in front of a store."

"The guy doesn't even notice."

"There's a smelly puddle, and it blends in because it is one of those malls with the polished granite stones for decoration at the entrance of certain stores."

"I was so stunned I didn't say anything."

"I wish I had thought to yell (as I usually have no problem calling that stuff out), but I honestly was just so flabbergasted that this man wouldn't even bother to watch his dog close enough when it is obviously not trained that I didn't."

"You could tell it was a 'mark his territory' type of wee."

"It's been a few years, and I'm still mad at the guy and at myself for saying nothing." ~ wavesnfreckles

"NTA. And there seem to be a few nasty mfers in here that think saying something to someone in public is worse than letting a pet piss inside of a building." ~ Sparky_Zell

"These are the people who don't wipe or wash their hands."

"Dirty fools going around sneezing in their hands and wiping snot on door handles." ~ dantevonlocke

"NTA. That's gross that she even thought that was OK."

"And the people asking if the mall is pet-friendly, as if that excuses it, are gross as well."

"What is going through some of y'all's minds. 🤣." ~ yeahipostedthat

"NTA, the dog should be taken outside for potty breaks."

"Whatever splatter she doesn't clean, if she cleans, is going to be smelly. Insanity."

"And encourage other dogs to pee there (which those dogs probably shouldn't be inside either, but that's another problem)." ~ Fresh_Salt7087

"I'm a dog owner, and my dog is well trained not to go to the toilet indoors, and will prompt me by whining and trying to leave if she needs to go while we're inside."

"If I'm taking her inside a dog-friendly store or mall, etc."

"I always make sure to find a patch of grass or something and prompt her to go."

"Bringing puppy pads with you so your dog can pee indoors is wild behaviour to be honest."

"You're definitely NTA, but at the same time, honestly, there are so many super weird people out there that you gotta pick your battles."

"If I saw someone doing what that woman did, I'd probably just be like ah, that's bonkers, but it's also not worth my time." ~ TaralasianThePraxic

"NTA. What the f**k?!!"

"The outdoors is LITERALLY right there, that's so gross."

"I have a dog with some bladder urgency issues who is trained to use a pad if I don't wake up fast enough in the middle of the night, but we both absolutely prefer she pees outdoors."

"That's just wild to me, that poor dog would much rather get to have a good sniff about a bush and have a nice outside pee. " ~ SparkleSelkie

"NTA. At some point, as a society, we decided that human babies - who must at all times be with other humans who also need to do human things like go to the shops - shouldn't exist in public places, but dogs - who need human accompaniment but are not humans and don't act like it - should be allowed to go everywhere."

"Thankfully, this is changing with better facilities for parents, but this attitude is still around, including through this thread."

"Dog owners sometimes don't grasp (or more likely, don't care) how antisocial they're being."

"I've been on walks where someone's dog - in a park that requires leashes (for their own safety, there are snakes!) - has jumped all and licked over me when unleashed, and boy, do their owners not react well when I tell them to leash the damn dog."

"I'm not even allergic or dealing with the trauma of an attack, like my partner, who has literal scars on his face from a dog attack as a child."

"Good on you for calling this out, it's disgusting, and the owner needs to know they're being judged for being so ridiculous, not just reported to security." ~ indeedy71

"NTA - service animals have been trained to wait until they are led to a proper area to 'do their business.'"

"Not a service animal?"

"Not allowed." ~ TenFourMoonKitty

"NTA. Totally NTA."

"Thank you for not bringing your dog to malls, grocery stores, restaurants, etc."

"Where I live, I see pet dogs at pharmacies, restaurants, stores, and even a dentist's clinic."

"As someone with severe dog allergies, I don't think pets belong in places where people are eating/buying food or treating health issues."

"Openly collecting and exposing dog urine and feces in a public indoor place is disgusting and risky."

"What was she going to do with the used pad?"

"Dump in the nearest trash can?"

"In this case, I'd report her to the facility and the health department with photos." ~ Retrogram033

"NTA. She shouldn't be bringing her pet to the mall unless it's a service pet."

"Even then, they should be taken outside to pee."

"It's not that hard." ~ DemonBoyAbaddon

"I once had to ask a woman to leave a restaurant I worked at because she changed her baby's blowout on her table."

"Two customers ended up puking, and the entire dining room cleared out at a sprint."

"This woman had the good grace to yell at me over kicking her out for spreading sh*t all over the place."

"She had to be trespassed by the local police department."

"NTA. People like this are everywhere, and their houses could be studied by microbiologists for decades." ~ GeologistLess3042

"NTA. The only reason I'd let this go is if it's an elderly dog and it's there going to the vet or something important."

"There's no reason this lady should've whipped out a pee pad in a busy mall, and she shouldn't have had her dog there to begin with."

"I've got two dogs that I love with all my heart and would adore to take everywhere, but I know that's just not feasible or appropriate."

"They can stay home or in the car." ~ Cynical_Feline

"NTA. Maybe I'm biased because gentrifying dog owners are ruining my city, but this is so gross."

"Excrement is excrement, urine is urine."

"It doesn't matter if it came out of your precious fur baby; it's still gross, and people shouldn't be subjected to it."

"If you are so clouded by your codependency and inability to function on your own outside that you can convince yourself that bodily fluids are a-okay to just exist anywhere, seek help, and until you do, stay inside. "

"I judge the mental stability of anyone this codependent on a pet." ~ DancingInAHotTub

"NTA, that's exactly why dogs aren't supposed to be in these buildings unless they're trained service dogs." ~ bellegroves

Reddit is 100% with you, OP.

This is a step too far.

Why couldn't the dog pee outside before they went in?

Why couldn't she run the poor pooch out quickly?

This type of behavior is outrageous.

Reddit believes your feelings are justified.

Should pets be allowed on furniture? Some people are a hard yes, some a hard no, while some say it depends on how nice the furniture is.

Pets in the bed is another bone of contention for people, especially in relationships.

A woman—for whom English isn't their first language—turned to the "Am I The A**Hole" (AITAH) subReddit for feedback.

Similar to AITA, the AITAH subReddit allows posters to ask for advice and post about ending romantic relationships—both things that are banned on AITA. However there are no required voting acronyms—only suggested ones—and no official final judgment declared.

Purple_Hair1877 asked:

"AITAH for not letting my boyfriend move in with me?"

The original poster (OP) explained:

"I (28, female) live alone with my dog (12, female) let's call her Nina she is my baby I found her and her siblings when they were about 2 weeks old and care for them only two survived sadly but I have to admit I spoiled her since the begining because she barely made it."

"My boyfriend (30, male) still lives with his mom which is not abnormal in our culture but lately they been fighting a lot because his sister moved back in with her kids and he doesn't have much space, he has a very good job so he can realistically move out alone but he is very insistant in wanting to move with me."

"We only been dating for 8 months and I don't think we are there yet also every time he visits he complains about something about Nina, he got mad the other night because he wanted to sleepover and wanted me to kick Nina out of the bed and I refused I told him before if he doesn't like it he can literally just break up with me. I'm not changing mine or Nina's life just because he doesn't want to move out alone."

"Well on Friday he got into a big fight with his family because one of his nephews grab his Nintendo switch and damage it or something and he came to my have with all his things packed pretending to just stay over without telling me and immediately trying to change things around he said Nina can sleep in the floor in our room or in the living room but he ain't living with a dog who is on the furniture."

"To make the long story short I kicked him out and told him he never even asked if he could come over and Nina lives here, he doesn't. He yelled a lot and got even more mad when I didn't reacted. He left and it's been texting me from a hotel telling me he's losing money because I'm mean and a bad girlfriend."

"I told him we'll talk again once he gets his own place. I told my friends about it and some of them were on my side but others said I was prioritizing a dog over a human and yes maybe but why is it so wrong?"

"I started doubting myself but I'm not really willing to make my dog suffer because he can't adapt to her or find his own place so AITAH?"

"I wanted to break up but my friends said I was overreacting, so I doubt myself."

"But my best friend said that even if you just don't like the way they breathe, you're allowed to break up."

Some Redditors weighed in by using the AITA voting acronyms:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA - You're The A**hole
• NAH - No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided the OP only mistake was not kicking this guy to the curb (NTA).

"NTA, Break up with this guy—not just because he cant respect that your dog lives there—but because he doesnt respect YOU and the rules in YOUR home. If you let him move in he will just take over, and he'll probably abuse your dog when you're not around."

"This guy doesn't communicate with you, he imposes himself on you without warning and then tries to throw his weight around. He truly isn't worth your time. he sounds like a nightmare." ~ Kindly_Candy_4831

"Besides him being a hobosexual, he is not a dog person and you are. Find someone who is and have a happy life. You can do far better than him." ~ MeasurementNatural95

"There are so many times opposites attract, so many things a couple can have respectful, contrasting opinions about."

"But, a person who loves animals and a person who can't stand animals will never be happy together. One will always resent the the other, either for having a pet or for never being able to have a pet." ~ calminthedark

"Boyfriends come and go but you are the center of Nina's world. You will never be loved like she loves you by your boyfriend. Oh and by the way, he is an aspiring abuser. Please move on. You can do better." ~ Alternative-Pin5760

"I can't disagree, the dog part alone makes you (the royal you) incompatible, and the hobosexual behavior just seals it. No reason to downgrade your life for someone who can't even handle his own housing." ~ I_Hate_Dogs_and_Cats

"Your friends are morons. Your dog has been your family for 12 years, this dude is just a guy you've known for 8 months."

"A man child who already tried to evict the doggie from the bedroom and move himself in without consent. To all the moron 'friends': OF COURSE I'M CHOOSING MY DOG OVER A MAN! Drop the dead weight of the dude and the friends." ~ BusyAd6096

"Tell them it isn't just about the dog—it's about him assuming he can just live there without so much as calling to talk to you about it. It's about him coming in without warning and wanting to change things around as if he has a right to."

"He is leaving a cavalcade of bright red flags in his wake—he is a controlling, manipulative man and if they don't see why you need to break up they aren't really your friends at all. No D is good enough to put up with that sh*t." ~ Kindly_Candy_4831

"Yeah, even if there was no dog, if someone showed up at my house and just expected to move in without any discussion I would tell them to get the f*ck out."

"I hope OP breaks up with him because that dude is crazy for thinking any part of his behavior was/is acceptable." ~ Urmomlervsme

"Leave him. If you stay, this will only get worse and before you know it Nina will be gone and you'll completely forget who you are. This man is throwing SO many red flags. If he moves in, it will be all the more difficult to get him out."

"He already disrespects and completely oversteps his boundaries which means he doesnt care about you. Sorry to be blunt, but I've been in a similar situation and I wish someone had told me this before I got deeper into it." ~ GotTheNurseCurse

"'Leave him' means tell him to not call, text, or visit. That he is not welcome."

"And then block him. And if he comes over, call the police." ~ MegansettLife

"NTA. He just showed up and was going to tell you how you were going to live. Nope. He wants to move in with you because it would make his life easier, not yours."

"He doesn't care how it effects you, how you live, or your dog. Listen to yourself, not your friends. They don't have to live your life." ~ Vandreeson

"Those 'friends' who think you were overreacting are WRONG. They're rather dumb too, and they probably think the same way as your (soon-to-be) ex about your dog."

"That idiot you are dating IS NOT A GOOD PERSON!!! I can promise you he's an entitled, controlling, immature piece of sh*t."

"He wants to move in with you so you can cook for him, clean after him, do his dishes, wash his clothes, etc, etc, etc... He needs a woman (you) to play Mommy to him. I can also promise you that he will never ever help you with anything in the house."

"DUMP THAT TRASH! Never ever betray your dog. Especially not for a filthy and totally worthless piece of garbage like your boyfriend." ~ YakElectronic6713

"You really need to get away from this man. In no universe will you end up happy if you allow him to stay. I dont know how easy it would be to move or get him out, but he seems like he would manipulate and gaslight you into thinking hes fine and youre overreacting."

"I cannot stress the importance of protecting yourself. This man is obviously from a culture that puts men first and women cater to them. Even if you are from this culture, you can do better."

"Please dont second guess this. Look at the way he is objectively. Don't preface with "well, at least he hasnt..." because there is time for that to happen. He hasn't gotten marriage from you and already is taking your place over and harming your dog."

"Don't let him baby-trap you because that's most likely next on his agenda." ~ l00ky_here

"That would NOT be overreacting. Look at how angry he got. That's a huge red flag." ~ robble808

"Your friends are WRONG! He turned up, UNINVITED, with ALL his belongings AND tried to TAKE OVER YOUR HOME! Break up and keep your peace. He doesn't want to live alone because he wants a woman to take care of him."

"You said yourself he HAS THE MEANS TO MOVE OUT OF HIS MOM'S HOUSE… BUT he hasn't. WHY?? Because he wants someone to take care of HIS needs. Ignore your friends and get rid of this man child." ~ rata_s80_v8

Uninvited houseguests who make demands should get just one thing—an invitation to leave and not come back.

Some people feel dogs are very special.

They are often regarded as a part of the family.

When they get older, sometimes accidents happen.

Incontinence can be very common.

Nobody enjoys constantly having to clean up after a doggie mess.

Redditor RudeDistribution5758 to discuss their experience and get some feedback, so naturally, they came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

They asked:

"AITA for refusing to put my dog down?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"My dog is 17 years old, and I have had him since he was a puppy and my entire adult life."

"He is a little chihuahua Pomeranian mix and a very sweet and gentle soul."

"He is very healthy, especially for a dog his age, and, although you can clearly see he's an old man, he has only shown signs of aging through partial loss of vision and hearing."

"He has been impressively housebroken for the duration of his life up until recently."

"He gets up out of his bed and just seems to go wherever he feels like it."

"When my husband and I are away, even for short durations, he is almost guaranteed to have an accident."

"He is still very mobile and verbal with a healthy appetite and joyful attitude."

"But now he just doesn't care to wait when he has to 'go.'"

"I work from home and I am able to take him outside frequently, which helps, but he has no shame in lifting a leg right in front of me if I'm in a meeting."

"I have recently ordered doggy diapers, which have yet to arrive, but this morning my husband suggested it's time to put him down."

"With an otherwise very healthy dog and lifelong companion, I was appalled and very defensive that he would even suggest such a thing."

"I had this dog long before I met my husband, and he and I don't share the same opinion on putting him down."

"My husband responded by saying, 'It's what people do at this stage and it's the mature thing to do.'"

"I know he's tired of the accidents, but my dog still has a very good quality of life with no underlying health issues."

The OP was left to wonder:

"Am I the a**hole for snapping and refusing to put him down?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question, AITA:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"Tell him you'll remember that when you guys are getting older and incontinent rears its ugly head, because it's incredibly common."

"Well, he still feels like it's time for you to die when you have to start wearing liners in your undies or he has to start wearing disposable briefs to bed?" ~ Khajiit_Has_Upvotes

"OP, I have a dog with prostate and kidney issues."

"We are in the same boat."

"He keeps peeing everywhere, and it's not his fault."

"It's easy to get frustrated, but diapers work."

"Make sure you get the correct gender diapers though (we made that mistake, oops)."

"Your husband may one day become incontinent as well as he ages, too, and have some grace."

"You're NTA." ~ urtypicalscorpio

"NTA. I had a dog live quite happily and healthily for 3 years in doggie diapers."

"We got nice soft reusable ones from Chewy and she loved them." ~ Mist2393

"As a fellow pomchi owner, NTA!"

"If the vet says he's mostly healthy, there's no way in hell I'd put him down."

"It's another story if they're truly suffering."

"I'm sorry your guy is getting up in years."

"It's rough." ~ kristtt67

"NTA. If the dog is otherwise healthy, it doesn't make sense to put the dog down."

"The bladder issues aren't so much that he 'just doesn't care to wait,' but more so that he can't wait."

"Old dogs lose control of their bladder and bowel movements."

"It even happens to old people."

"Getting diapers is the way to go."

"They helped my pup (and my sanity) in the last couple of years of her life." ~ Spare-Shirt24

"I love doggie diapers."

"Got a pup that marked a lot, and she stopped because we put her in basically washable pants with fun patterns or ruffles."

"When we forgot to diaper her, she also stopped having accidents, mostly." ~ Unusual-Relief52

"NTA, but with some caveats."

"When dogs start having vision/hearing issues, they can sometimes have a lot of other problems you don't know about, especially with fear/anxiety."

"They can no longer see/hear danger, so they may perceive danger where there isn't any, and might be unnecessarily afraid, and really suffering from that anxiety."

"Physically, they might be 'fine,' but emotionally, they are not."

"And when you add the accidents in, that adds to it."

"As a housebroken dog, he knows that he's not supposed to do that."

"So, when he does do it, he might feel fear and confusion, whatever version of 'shame' a dog can feel, etc."

"Conversely, he might be doing it on purpose - because doing it in the house is safer than doing it outside."

"Outside, since he can no longer see/hear danger, he might be afraid to do his business - it's a vulnerable position to be in."

"He might physically be in great health for a 17-year-old dog."

"But his physical organs aren't the only thing to consider."

"Just because he CAN continue to live doesn't always mean that he should."

"You're still NTA, but I do ask that you think about his entire quality of life, not just whether his body is technically still kicking." ~ Money-Possibility606

"This is such a good answer!"

"It can be incredibly difficult to make the choice to put down a family member you've had in your life for so long."

"But looking at the overall quality of life is extremely important when making this call."

"The only positive here is that OP says the dog has a good appetite and is generally happy."

"I will vote NAH, though."

"I don't think her husband is an AH for wanting to have this discussion with her due to so many of the factors listed."

"Dealing with a blind, deaf dog that is peeing and pooping in the house is not something a lot of people would want to deal with."

"I hope the doggy diapers help, but I also hope OP comes to terms with the fact that she may need to revisit this topic sooner rather than later." ~ Discount_Mithral

"NAH. At this stage in life, it's reasonable for this kind of conversation to start."

"Take your dog to the vet; see what your vet says."

"Depending on that information, see how the dog diapers/any medication works."

"I am a huge dog lover myself, but when frequent accidents start happening, and you have to either confine a dog to a small part of the house, or have your house have dog pee/poop accident all over, the quality of life does diminish."

"I'm sorry you're going through this."

"A dog's aging is very, very hard to handle (I say as someone getting up at 4 am every day with my 14-year-old basset hound)." ~ makethatnoise

"NAH. He's your little pal, and if the vet deems him in good health, then diapers can be a good idea."

"But your husband probably doesn't love how his house smells (it smells, I'm sorry to tell you) and the extra cleaning."

"Don't dismiss your husband's feelings." ~ Background-Interview

"I'm not going to rule NTA or YTA, but I just want you to realize your dog's quality of life is completely based on your perception."

"Yeah, he's 'healthy,' but he's certainly not living the life a dog is supposed to live."

"Just keep that in mind for whatever decision you make." ~ Sugandis_Juice

"My Pomeranian did quite well for a few years using diapers."

"It wasn't all that much work (he only used them for tinkle. He still went out for poop)."

"I finally made the final decision when he was no longer interested in eating or in the treats that his pills came in."

"I knew it was time then."

"But, before that, he had quite a few years left after becoming semi-incontinent."

"I would use the diapers." ~ Fun_Claim_2028

"NAH, but you're definitely downplaying some pretty clear signs that the dog's quality of life is declining."

"It's fine not to be ready."

"Really, you're never READY."

"But he's right to bring it up, and he's also right that it sounds like the time is starting to approach."

"Would tomorrow be early, given what you've described? Probably."

"But there's no way your husband brought it up thinking you guys were just going to hop in the car and head to the vet that day."

"It's a thing for you to start thinking about and considering what signs WOULD lead you to that point." ~ Thisismyworkday

"I'm going with NAH."

"Being incontinent is not fun, but if he doesn't seem bothered, then his quality of life is still good enough to try the diapers."

"That's what I would do."

"But incontinence is usually a sign of something else wrong, so be advised that his health may take a turn soon."

"The strategy with putting animals down is to try to find that sweet spot where you don't wait too long and let them suffer, but you also don't do it needlessly too early."

"So your husband is probably thinking that now is the time to say goodbye to prevent suffering."

"Or at least I hope he is."

"If he's just annoyed with the poop, then he's an a**hole." ~ the_elephant_stan

"NTA. I lost my dog in April."

"She couldn't hold it most days."

"But it was the second time she fell over for no reason that I decided I was being selfish."

"Well, said goodbye that night." ~ DoublecursedAngel

Reddit is with you 100%, OP.

Your husband is out of line.

Yes, this is a stressful situation, but it can be manageable.

If your fur baby still has life left to live, he should get to live it.

Good Luck.

I've owned cats all my life, but would never imagine bringing them with me everywhere, despite their compact, portable size.

So why do some people insist on doing that with their dogs?

Some places are pet-friendly and dogs are welcome, but forcing your dog into spaces not designed for them or into other people's homes is just rude and potentially dangerous.

A parent dealing with their mother-in-law's aggressive dog turned to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subReddit for feedback after banning the dog from their home.

Negative_Appeal_5928 asked:

"AITA for telling my mother-in-law that she can't bring her dog to our home?"

The original poster (OP) explained:

"My wife and I live in a small condo with a 1-year-old son and 2 cats. My mother-in-law has a small Maltese dog which is very loud, always barking."

"This dog has growled at our son multiple times and even tried to bite him in the past. On top of that, our 2 cats get very upset whenever she brings the dog over to our place. They will hide under the bed and hiss."

"My mother-in-law has noticed this and has apologized that the cats are uncomfortable. While we let her bring her dog in the past, the last time we decided that the dog wasn't safe for our son, and that the cats shouldn't have to deal with seeing this dog if it makes them uncomfortable."

"I decided that I didn't want her dog to visit anymore with her. My wife has said multiple times she doesn't want the dog over either, but she's afraid to offend her mother."

"Her mother will bring the dog to restaurants and shopping malls under the guise that the dog is a 'service' animal and even attempted to bring her into the hospital when our son was born, before she was told no."

"The other day, we invited her over, and I told her that when she comes, not to bring her dog. She got really angry and started yelling on the phone, saying she won't bother coming, only her husband will come."

"It's been almost 2 weeks. My wife tried to call her twice, and she hasn't picked up. My father-in-law said she's offended because she brought the dog in the past."

"I told him that we decided after the last time the dog came and our son's safety was at risk as well as the fact that the cats were upset meant that we decided going forward that other than our two cats, no pets are allowed at our home anymore."

"I explained that it's not a direct attack, but if anyone else wanted to bring a pet, we would also say they could not."

"Apparently, my mother-in-law expects us to contact her even though we did twice and she didn't answer. I have decided I'm not contacting her, and she can contact me/my wife if she wants to talk after she ignored my wife's two calls."

"Am I the a**hole?"

The OP summed up why they might be the a**hole in their situation.

"I didn't let my mother-in-law bring her dog, because she brought her dog in the past."

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA - You're The A**hole
• NAH - No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).

"How unyieldingly childish is this woman? Yeah, she brought the dog last time. That was the problem. NTA." ~ ironchef8000

"The fact that she takes her dog to restaurants and even the hospital by pretending that it is a service animal tells you that she is childish, and also self-centered. Let her have her little hissy fit and not come over until she decides to act the way she should. I wouldn't bother trying to contact her, leave it up to her to do the right thing." ~ Infamous-Purple-3131

"Was coming to say this. Your MIL is a major AH for faking a service dog and putting real service dogs and their handlers at risk. She is also a major AH for letting her dog snap at your child."

"Hold firm on your boundaries, OP. Also, as someone with a toxic MIL, 2 things that helped me - couples counseling and the book 'Toxic In-Laws' by Dr. Susan Forward." ~ BluffCityTatter

"The dog may be an emotional support animal, but unless it is trained to perform a specific task, it is not a service animal. She needs to be set straight. Service animals are allowed everywhere; spoiled people's pocket pets are not."

"Moreover, the fact that the dog snapped at your child, who is at the same level and could be seriously injured, tells everyone it is not a service animal. She is the a**hole, not you. However, your wife needs more steel. This is her child!" ~ InevitableJury7510

"The dog growled at the baby, snapped at him, and almost bit him. The dog cannot come. If MIL makes that her hill to die on, make sure to get her a nice headstone. MIL cares more about the dog than her grandchild."

"Your child's safety is more important than her dog. NTA." ~ Karamist623

"NTA, but now your wife knows the dog is more important than she and her family is. Hang in there." ~ Mathamagician77

"MIL also doesn't seem to care for the dog's comfort either, since the dog is clearly unhappy when visiting. She cares about herself." ~ calling_water

"I was thinking earlier today about whether narcissists in particular tend to have poorly behaved dogs, because they think of the dog as an extension of themselves, and therefore they can never be told no."

"Just random musings totally unrelated to anything at all here." ~ FeuerroteZora

"Ever notice that some people like having untrained and unpleasant pets? It's like their sneaky, passive-aggressive ways of messing with people when they haven't got the spine to be up front with their anger." ~ Athingwithfeathers2

"So your MIL is essentially saying she chooses her own comfort of bringing her animal to your house over the safety of her grandchild? Her inability to properly train her dog is on her. NTA and good on you for putting your family's NEEDS over your mil's WANTS." ~ slackerchic

"This is my thought too. OP is NTA, but their entitled MIL sure is when she puts her dog before the safety of her grandchild! This is absolutely disgusting." ~ Public_Reaction2129

"NTA. Service dog handler here, I don't even take my guy when I go to someone else's house (unless we are traveling and it's okay with the owner of the house, I do my best to make sure my guy isn't a burden) but I've had two close friends have babies in the last two months and I left my guy home when I went to meet the babies."

"They did not ask me to leave him at home. I decided it was best, and they appreciated it."

"The growling and barking at your baby will only escalate as your child grows up. The toddler stage is going to be even worse. I would seriously worry that the child could be harmed by the dog. If it has attempted to bite your kid now, it probably will end up nipping or biting your child as they get even more mobile."

"Something about the way babies move and toddlers move that freaks some dogs out, and it seems this dog needs training and separation from your child. The relationship might change as your child grows up (like kindergarten age) or it may not."

'Protect your child, if it hurts your MIL and she decides to not have a relationship with your child then that's on her. Sorry, you and your wife are dealing with this OP." ~ Temporary_Fee_1448

"I hate how entitled dog owners and 'ESA's' have made it hard for real service dog owners. I'm not even a dog person. I don't like dogs."

"But service dogs are medical equipment, and everyone trying to pass off their dog as a fake service dog is making it so hard for service dog owners. Like now, when someone says this is a service dog, nobody believes them because of people like this MIL." ~ MoirasCheese

"NTA. My guess is that if the dog behaved itself around your son, more so than the cats, this wouldn't be an issue. Your MIL doesn't seem like a reasonable person, and it seems her dog is a higher priority than her own family. While she won't see past her own selfishness, the ball is in her court to come to you." ~ Pappy579

"NTA. You sound like very sweet people. I would like to be friends with folks like you. Now get a backbone!"

"This is an easy one, an 'oh hell no you don't bring Fido Berserko into this home with our baby' one."

"Future efforts to protect your child won't always be so obvious. So practice saying No for future scenarios, by saying it now, steadily and unwaveringly, and without guilt and without hiding the truth or making up excuses, just the straight truth, to your entitled and reckless MIL." ~ Expert_Slip7543

"NTA. It's just rude to bring your dog to somebody's house. And your MIL sounds beyond entitled and rude." ~ whynotbecause88

"What is it with people seemingly being incapable of being separated from their dogs? This is a relatively recent thing, and it pisses me off. It shows a lack of maturity and emotional development."

"And many people are allergic to or afraid of dogs. Your desire to have your dog with you 24/7 doesn't outweigh their comfort. NTA. Your MIL is." ~ ReversedFrog

"It's not even good for the dogs either. It's too much stimulation, too much activity, and it's unsafe for many reasons. People who love their dogs leave them at home because it's best for them." ~ Viola-Swamp

Safety first, and it sounds like this isn't a safe situation for the baby, the cats, or the dog.

If the mother-in-law can't see that, banning her dog is these parents' only option.

Putting together a family gift for a loved one is meant to be a touching show of affection.

Pictures of all of the kids and grandkids on something fun or sentimental can brighten a lot of grandparents' days.

However, what is meant to be a fun, thoughtful project can often become difficult to produce.

Not everyone involved does their part to complete the process.

Redditor Fickle_Collar2459 wanted to discuss his experience and get some feedback, so naturally, he came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

He asked:

"AITA for replacing pictures of my cousins with pictures of my dog?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"My grandpa's birthday was a couple of weeks ago."

"Six weeks before his birthday, I texted all of my siblings and cousins (there are 9 of us) and told them to send me a picture of themselves within the next 4 weeks so I could put it on a phone case for our grandpa's birthday."

"Two weeks later, I sent the text again, saying I needed a picture of them, and anybody who chooses not to send a picture will be replaced by a picture of my dog."

"I had three cousins tell me to screenshot something from their Instagrams."

"I didn't respond."

"I sent a text out the day before I put in the order, saying anybody who did not send a picture of themselves in the next 24 hours would be replaced by pictures of my dog."

"The same 3 cousins never sent pictures."

"Their spots have my dog in a sombrero, my dog at the pumpkin patch, and my dog in a chicken costume."

"They came over for my grandpa's birthday and saw him open his new phone case."

"They saw that their pictures weren't on the case and got mad at me for not picking something off their Instagrams like they told me to."

"I said that I sent 3 reminders to send me a picture with a clear warning that anybody who did not send a picture would be replaced with a picture of the dog."

"They knew exactly what would happen."

"My grandpa finds it hilarious, but their parents are telling my parents that I kept them off the phone case on purpose, and they want me to apologize."

The OP was left to wonder:

"AITA for replacing them with pictures of my dog because they never sent me a picture?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question, AITA:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"Grandpa liked it."

"That's all that matters. NTA." ~ Hawaiianstylin808

"They DIDN'T participate in the project."

"OP gave them multiple weeks and multiple notices to send a pic and even told them what would be on it if they didn't."

"OP paid for it, and whether it was a solo gift or supposed to be a group project is irrelevant."

"They can't get upset that they're not on it, or even that they look bad, if they didn't want to take the time to ensure that neither was the case." ~ Your_Daddy_1972

"I agree with your point and the lazy one."

"I think both are true."

"The 3 said to take pictures off of their Instagram, so clearly they can send and post pictures with no issues."

"It's just that they couldn't be bothered to make that TINY bit of effort for a gift for good ol' gramps."

"Also, I'm wonderfully glad that he enjoyed it." ~ AaliyahFurry

"Right?!"

"They literally could have screenshotted their own Instagram and texted it to OP."

"They didn't even have to get up or look away from their phones, and they couldn't even do that tiny, one-second task." ~ Kathrynlena

"NTA. Hope Gramps leaves you all his money." ~ stoligirl2121

"Good, they never chipped in, so don't have a say in the matter."

"They were given plenty of time to send a picture, but they were too lazy to do it."

"What if you picked a picture of them from their Instagram that they didn't like?"

"Would they be just as upset, probably."

"You gave them a chance to send you a good picture of themselves, but they were too lazy."

"Grandpa loves it with the dog pics, so that is all that counts in the end."

"They didn't chip in, so they don't get a say." ~ Several-Finish-3216

"NTA. You gave them plenty of warning and told them exactly what would happen if they didn't send."

"Yeah, you could've screenshot something on their socials, but they didn't want to make any effort, so they didn't need to be on the gift." ~ Your_Daddy_1972

"This story has many elements I enjoy: an earnest narrator, lazy cousins, a picture of a dog in some kind of headgear, and a laughing grandparent."

"Your lazy cousins and the hand-wringing relatives can kick rocks. NTA!" ~ SalaudChaud

"NTA. For those saying it's not that hard for OP to go to each of their IG accounts and screenshot a pic, it's even easier for each of those cousins to do it for themselves because they know which photo they would like OP to use, and OP doesn't have to try to choose."

"Like seriously, if they want their pic on a gift that OP is making and paying for, they can freaking send in their own photo."

"The audacity to tell you to go get a pic of them."

"They were so lazy."

"They didn't participate after multiple warnings, which you were very kind to give."

"Didn't they clue in that you kept giving warnings and they hadn't participated or even checked in with you, like, hey, were you able to get a pic off my IG?"

"And their parents telling you to apologize, F that."

"Tell the cousins and parents to grow up."

"They should be happy you asked everyone in the first place."

"The requirements were clear, and they chose not to participate." ~ prairieice

"Exactly, OP organized it and paid for it, and they couldn't be bothered to spend an entire minute picking out a photo from their socials to send for it."

"I mean, in a month, you know they have to have been on there at least once to post something or scroll through their feed."

"And they still wouldn't take a second to send a photo." ~ readergirl35

"NTA. You warned them."

"They wanted you to do all the work."

"Petty would have been finding the worst possible photos of them to use."

"They didn't care enough then to spend a few minutes picking a photo to send you; it's too late to care now." ~ nemc222

"Context: was this a group gift or just from you, with all of them in mind?"

"It really won't change my mind, but some people may need that context."

"NTA. Don't be a lazy team project person and get angry when you're not on the final product." ~ CommunicationMean158

"NTA, they have no right to complain, they knew exactly what would happen if they didn't make a small amount of effort because you told them exactly what you'd do if they didn't."

"Show their parents your messages; this is entirely on your cousins."

"Your a-hole status may change if you don't show us the dog photos though!" ~ elevenohnoes

"NTA, and honestly, this is hilarious."

"And I say this as exactly the type of person who would have forgotten to send the pic and been replaced by a dog."

"Look, some of us are Not Good at this type of thing."

"If we're halfway decent people, we know this about ourselves and live with the consequences."

"And even laugh at them sometimes." ~ jupitersbears

"NTA. It was generous of you to offer them the chance to have their pics included, and reasonable for them to spend those few minutes sending a pic to you."

"Any who chose not to could reasonably be seen as opting out, which you essentially gave them the option to do."

"Anyone complaining has no one to blame but their own lazy arse for not doing the bare minimum."

"Also, your solution was ingenious and hilarious."

"Your grandpa got a good laugh out of it, you got some great memories, and maybe your cousins learned a lesson!" ~ Prestigious_String20

"In the length of time it took them to reply for you to take something off their Instagram, they could have shared a photo from their Instagram."

"NTA, and I'm happy your grandpa loved it." ~ Alfredthegiraffe20

"NTA, you gave them warnings, and your grandad found it hilarious, that's all that matters."

"At the end of the day, it's a phone case, not a bespoke oil on canvas painting or a massive family portrait you intentionally excluded them from."

"It's a cool, fun gift that I bet your grandad will laugh at every time he picks it up." ~ Vampyr145

"NTA. I did this once with our Christmas card."

"My sister was not responding, so I chose the ugliest Pic of her I could find."

"Sent out the proofs saying I was gonna order, and all of a sudden, I get the picture of her I had been asking for for about a week."

"Now she knows if you don't answer, I WILL be petty and find the worst picture of you." ~ CreativeSoul555

"NTA, but there is a whole lot of lazy going on!"

"Your cousins weren't out of line by saying you should download their photos."

"It's your gift, so it isn't unreasonable for you to do the work."

"But it only takes a minute for someone to send you a photo of themselves that they like and approve of."

"I really hope you added names to the photos, though."

"Like Billy under the sombrero pic, Jill on the pumpkin patch... that would make it easy to prolong the pleasure of having your dog take their places!!"

"Jokes every year!" ~ fromhelley

"Oh no!"

"The absolutely clear consequences of their behavior happened as previously warned numerous times!"

"Who could have foreseen this?!?"

"Not them, apparently."

"Happy birthday Gramps and NTA OP." ~ YarnsAndYawns

Reddit is with you, OP.

They were being lazy.

If they had cared enough, they would've sent the photos.

Glad that your Grandpa enjoyed the gift.

Some people think dogs are awesome, some people feel differently.

Children can have many problems with dogs.

Big dogs in particular can cause anxiety in small kids.

This can be an issue when visiting the homes of friends and family who own pets.

Redditor Upbeat-Egg2923 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback, so naturally, they came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

They asked:

"AITA Not Forcing My Son to Go to a Birthday Party because of the host's dogs?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"My son is 8 and in 3rd grade."

"He recently got invited to a friend's birthday party at their house."

"Last school year, he and this friend were pretty close, and they started hanging out outside of school."

"Turns out, my son doesn't like going to the friend's house because they have a pair of G[erman] S[hepherd]s."

"They are big dog people."

"Because of the dogs, I gently worked it out where the friend would come over to our house or go to a 3rd space."

"More recently, sports have picked up, and so there is less time for these hangouts."

"So, inherently, we haven't had to address or avoid going to this friend's house."

"I asked him if he wanted to go to the party."

"He said only if the dogs weren't there."

"I said okay."

"I broached the topic with the friend's parents, and they shut it down on removing or putting away the dogs."

"They said it's the dog's house too, and if we put them away, they'll destroy the room they put them in."

"I told them my son would not be coming."

"They got mad."

"The party is next weekend."

The OP was left to wonder:

"So... AITA?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question, AITA:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"NAH. Your son doesn't want to go because there are big dogs that scare him, and you support him."

"Spot. You're not raising a spoiled child; you're raising someone who knows how to recognize when they're uncomfortable."

"Other parents can keep their dogs loose as much as they want, but they must also accept that this limits who can feel comfortable in their home."

"They can't get angry because someone chooses not to attend."

"Parties are for fun, not involuntary exposure therapy."

"You did the right thing: you asked, you offered alternatives, you were respectful."

"If there is no fix, it just won't go away."

"End of story." ~ SocietyNo7720

"The other parents are TA."

'The idea of having 2 German Shepherds roaming freely during a kids' party is just terrible."

"These are very intelligent but high-strung dogs."

"My friend had a German Shepherd and a Maltese; they were best friends."

"My friend threw a dinner party (adults, no kids, nothing wild) and let the dogs lie underneath the dining table."

"The German Shepherd got so wound up that she turned and grabbed her best friend, the Maltese, and broke his neck."

"Dead Maltese, German Shepherd was never the same again, utter disaster."

"NEVER let dogs roam free during a party!!! NTA." ~ TipElectronic535

"NTA, and if they can't put the dogs away without them destroying the room, then they clearly have issues with these dogs anyway." ~ GiddyGabby

"I have a big dog who is service trained and knows not to jump on people, beg, or do anything of the sort."

"I still put him in his crate or in a different room when maintenance or anyone else comes in, because I know not everyone is okay with big dogs and while I know he is perfectly safe to be around, other people don't know that and I'd rather them feel comfortable and safe for the short time they're in my home than make a big deal out of nothing."

"It's not a problem for him to be in a different room or in his crate - that's what those things are for."

"If their dogs destroy the room when they're put away, it sounds like they're badly trained, and having them running around during the party is a recipe for disaster anyhow."

"I wouldn't want a kid going over to that kind of mess either, especially with powerful breeds like that. NTA!" ~ OutragedPineapple

"NTA. I think the fact that the dogs will destroy a room when left unsupervised would make me ok with not letting my child go to that house."

"That sounds like bad separation anxiety, which can lead to other unwanted behaviors."

"I kinda understand the dog owners... my dog was part of the family."

"No one in my social circle had a fear of dogs, so I never had to isolate her; however, if a guest had expressed being afraid of dogs, my pooch would've had zero issues with taking a nap in my bedroom."

"It sucks that they can't/won't do this for at least a birthday party." ~ MrsNaypeer

"NTA. If he's uncomfortable, he should not go."

"The other parents were wrong for getting upset, though."

"They made their choice, and you and your son made yours." ~ Decent_Front4647

"We had rotweillers when the kids were small."

"We also had a piece of the yard sectioned off to put them in when we had guests over."

"This protected both the guests and the dogs from overenthusiasm."

"Not all people are comfortable with large dogs." ~ Green_Parfait9407

"Absolutely NTA."

"Your son doesn't want to go and has made this clear."

"Good job for listening to him and respecting his wishes."

"The parent's reaction concerns me."

"If those dogs will 'destroy' a room during the party, they are not trained well, and I would be reluctant to have my child around them." ~ Fun-Holiday9016

"You are NTA to ask them to put them away."

"They are not the AH for refusing... but they are AHs for getting mad about you not bringing your son." ~ Electrical-Dingo7675

"NTA, they are mildly TA."

"Your son isn't wrong for not going because he's not comfortable with the dogs."

"They're not wrong for refusing to put the dogs in a room for a party, even if they would for something like having work done on the house or whatever."

"You're not wrong for politely declining the invitation on your son's behalf, according to his wishes."

"They can be disappointed, but they should not make that your problem by expressing anger toward you."

"It's a natural potential consequence of their stance on the dogs."

"It's fine, but they have to accept that some people won't be coming to their house." ~ PinkNGreenFluoride

"NTA at all."

"I'm a huge dog person."

"I have three dogs."

"They usually have free rein of the house."

"But when we have guests, they are put away."

"ESPECIALLY if the kids have friends over."

"I am simply not taking that risk."

"Anything could happen."

"My dogs go into their own room with their beds and a door to their own yard."

"They actually feel safer and happier."

"Guests make them nervous, and they prefer being in their bedroom." ~ AriasK

"NTA. It's fine of you to ask and also fine of them to say they're not gonna put the dogs away, but them getting mad at you is absurd (also sounds like the dogs aren't trained)." ~ softballpants

"NTA. Your son does not want to go to a place where he does not feel safe."

"You won't make him go."

"That makes you a loving parent."

"Sounds like you asked the hosts in a general way for the information and made a reasonable decision."

"The hosts sound immature."

"They can't accept a 'no' rsvp?"

"They are overthinking and putting emotion into this."

"I hope your son and the birthday boy can maintain a friendship despite the birthday boy's parents."

"They sound like some winning dog parents, too (sarcasm)!" ~ ZealousidealPay608

"NTA. If he's uncomfortable around them and they won't separate them from them, do not send him."

"I love dogs, but GSDs will sense his fear."

"I've known them to intentionally intimidate people whom they sense are afraid."

"Not saying they would harm him, but they could mess with him if inclined." ~ Active_Palpitation71

"NTA. Your son's comfort comes first. "

"I can't believe they would get upset about him not attending because of his fear."

"Not every person on the planet is going to be rapturously in love with their dogs." ~ IdealDramatic9740

"NAH. Going to a party or not should be your son's decision."

"He said he didn't want to go if the dogs were going to be there, and they will be."

"It is perfectly reasonable for someone who does not like dogs to be unwilling to be around them."

"And it is reasonable to ask that the dogs be kept away from you (or to ask that on behalf of your son)."

"At the same time, it is reasonable to refuse to lock up your dogs in your own home, at least in a situation where everyone can be clear on the rules in advance and no one is forced to be there."

"If you did force your son to go, you would be an AH, and if the other parents knew your son was being forced and still kept the dogs around him, they would also be AHs."

"But as it is, your son is getting to control his exposure to the dogs, and his friend's parents are getting to have their dogs have the run of their home." ~ philautos

"NTA. Your son doesn't want to go, full stop."

"They aren't TA for declining to put away the dogs, but they became TA when they got mad at you for not going." ~ ConflictGullible392

Reddit agrees with you, OP.

You are concerned for your child.

You were polite and truthful.

They don't have to shut their dog away, but they should be more understanding.

If you care, maybe drop off a gift.

Good Luck.

When entering a living situation with a roommate, there are often stipulations and conditions that need to be met and addressed before they can move in.

As roommates often become friends, these conditions are sometimes forgotten with the passage of time.

In certain cases, however, these conditions and stipulations are non-negotiable, and breaking them can and will result in the termination of the living situation.

Even between friends.

After coming into a lucky piece of property, Redditor Nearby_Flan7905 decided to rent out some of the rooms.

The original poster (OP) felt lucky that he was able to rent out one of his rooms to a good friend.

However, a change in the friend's situation eventually made his living there untenable, eventually leading the OP to force this friend to move out.

Wondering if he was being unreasonable, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where he asked fellow Redditors:

"AITA Refuse to live with a Service Dog?"

The OP explained why he had to force his roommate to move out:

"I (26 M[ale]) own my own home."

"Its 5 bedrooms and way more space than I need."

"I came into the house due to a death in the family, and I've had it for about 2 years."

"I use 3 bedrooms, my room, my office, my video game room."

"The other 2 rooms I rent out."

"One roommate, I don't know very well, and keeps to himself."

"The other roommate is a friend from college."

"The friend from college is a diabetic."

"He has a CGM and that's how he manages it."

"I honestly don't know much more about his condition and don't pry as its not my business."

"He recently informed me that he is getting a service dog that alerts for his diabetes."

"He's supposed to get the dog next week."

"I do not want to live with a dog, I don't like them."

"I told him he can break his lease for a new place but he can't have the dog in my house."

"Until this, it has been overall smooth sailing as roommates."

"He's angry with me and supposedly looking into ways to make me accept the dog."

"He had a good situation at my house."

"He's told me I'm an asshole for basically kicking him out because he is disabled."

"AITA?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA: Not the A**hole
• YTA: You're the A**hole
• ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
• NAH: No A**holes Here

The Reddit community was in agreement that the OP was not the a**hole for refusing to allow the OP to bring a service dog into his home.

Some could sympathize with both the OP and his friend, feeling that the service dog was not a pet, but a necessary aid, but agreed that the OP had the right to refuse to allow a dog in his home:

"The number of people who don't understand that FHA doesn't apply here because you live in the unit is honestly crazy to me."

"The only way FHA applies here is if you own five or more units."

"Otherwise, no, you do not need to accommodate the service dog, because the unit is owner-occupied."

"NAH."

"This is just kind of an unfortunate scenario for you and your roommate."

"Ideally, you would be ok with living with the service dog but what if you had allergies, or some other condition preventing you from living with a dog?"

"Anyway, I'd make sure to give him a reasonable amount of time to move out if it comes to that."

"It also wouldn't hurt to consult with a lawyer before doing anything."

"People need to brush up on FHA laws before immediately jumping on the bandwagon."- Miserable-Ad561

Others thought that as it was the OP's house, he had every right to refuse to allow a dog,  pointing out that he was not kicking his roommate out because he was disabled, but simply because he was breaking the living agreement:

"Every single person saying it's illegal and just medical equipment are glossing over THIS IS OP'S HOME."

"They just happen to rent out individual rooms, the 'laws' ya'll keep referencing don't apply."

"OP has every right to not want ANY animal in their home, whether technically medical equipment or not; it is still a dog, and most are actively trained by owners. They don't just come perfectly well-behaved, and even those that are trained prior still shed and have accidents; they're not robots. Animals, ANY type, when being brought into a communal situation, need to be approved by everyone living in said communal situation."

"NTA."- Opposite-Exam-7435

"You're living there."

"You're not just a landlord, you're a roommate, who would have to deal with exposure to allergens."

"There's no way you would never see the dog."

"The comments seem to be glossing over the fact that this is where you live."

"NTA."

"If he signed a lease or not is not clear from your post, but you'll obviously have to deal with fallout from this in one way or another, I'm sorry."- sunlightanddoghair

"I love how people act like a dog being a 'service animal' suddenly makes them no longer a dog."

"They're still an animal living in your house with all the cons that brings."

"NTA but cover your bases legally."- ObjectivePepper6064

"If live in the same house and rent out only a room or two — in that case, the Fair Housing Act may not apply."

"Owner-occupied housing with four or fewer units is often exempt from the FHA."

"That means if you're renting out a room in your own primary residence, you might legally have more discretion."

"NTA."- spin01

"As a dog owner myself, I'd say NTA."

"You don't want your house being filled with fur and what else dogs bring in - that's fair."

"I don't think you can get your hand on a service animal just like * that * so I'd say your friend is a soft ah."

"He should've asked and planned beforehand."

"He did, however, not plan, and told you this, so I'd draft up a 'time to move out within 3 months' eviction."

"Which should be alright cus I guess you have mutual sign-up release, right?"- NoHeccinClue

"I have a service dog— you're well within your rights to not allow a service dog in your own home if it's not something you're comfortable with."

"It's a little bit of an a**hole move to kick the friend out so last minute if he needs to be out before he gets the dog and the dog is coming next week, but it's also an a**hole move on his part to not make you and the other roommate aware of his plan to get a service dog, as it DOES affect other people you live with and is absolutely something they should know."

"He really didn't give you much of any warning, so it's not like you could've told him any further in advance that he needs to figure out a different living situation if he's getting a dog, service dog or not."

"Also, getting a service dog is NOT a short process or something you do on impulse."

"If he's getting this dog already trained from a program, that often takes YEARS. There's no way he hasn't been aware of this for months, AT LEAST."

"He should've brought it up to you before finalizing things, and any reputable service dog organization would make sure that the client's living situation is suitable and everyone in the home is in agreement before placing a dog."

"There's no way that happened here, which in combination with the quick timeline makes me think that either the dog he's getting isn't actually trained yet and will essentially be a pet until training is actually done, or might be from a less than reputable/scam program."

"Either way, I'd be concerned."

"Anyway, NTA."

"You're allowed to not want to live with a dog in your own home when you're also living there, and since the FHA doesn't apply in this situation you're legally allowed to enforce that."- picnicprince

"NTA, because he should have talked to you before going ahead and getting the service dog - that isn't a quick process and often involves a wait list (because of the training involved, and the washout rate), so if he really is getting a service dog, he's known about it for at least weeks, if not months or years."

"You're not an AH for not wanting to live with a dog."

"I highly doubt that your friendship will survive this, though... Good luck to you."

"You may want to talk to a lawyer specializing in housing/rental contracts about how best to handle evicting him if needed, what to do if he doesn't listen and brings the dog in anyway, etc."- Low-Bank-4898

It does seem unfair that the OP's friend might need to find a new home owing to a necessary change in his life.

That being said, as this is the OP's property, he has every right to create rules for living there.

Hopefully, however, the OP will put up with living with a service dog until his friend finds a new home.

A wedding guest list can be arduous to assemble.

With the cost of weddings these days, every guest has a price, and every penny is counted.

So, inviting animals can cause a bit of an issue.

At the very least, where do they fit in the photos?

It's a conundrum.

Redditor Plenty_Tap9799 wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback, so naturally, she came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

She asked:

"AITA - Do not want a service dog to participate in my wedding?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"I'm (28 F[emale]) am getting married in the spring."

"I've asked one of my best friends to be one of my bridesmaids."

"She has a service dog for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. "

"I respect her dog and am glad she has it in her life."

"My Fiancé and I don't particularly care for dogs, and we've decided we don't want her service dog in our photos or in the ceremony."

"When I asked her, she got excited and immediately said her dog could wear something to match the rest of the bridesmaids."

"That's when I explained that the dog could come to the wedding, but wouldn't be an active participant in the day."

"We don't want it in photos or in the ceremony."

"It could go to photos, but not be in them."

"It'll be off to the side for the 10-15 minute ceremony."

"In preliminary discussions with our photographer, we've brought this up."

"She did not take it well."

"Called me an a**hole and ableist, and it was not a constructive conversation after the ask."

"She hasn't accepted my offer to be a bridesmaid, but she hasn't declined formally."

The OP was left to wonder:

"Am I the a**hole?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question AITA:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"I'm too European for this. NTA." ~ angrypassionfruit

"A dog is not a wheelchair, yeah, I think that's kinda gross, but I'm still going NTA on this specific situation."

"Wedding pictures and the like are always partly going to be about aesthetics, and asking that an animal that doesn't have much significance to the bride and groom not be included in the pictures is perfectly reasonable and not ableist." ~ c**t_in_wonderland

"NTA, you said you're okay with your friend having the dog at the wedding, just did not want the dog to be an active participant in the wedding ceremony and photos."

"I feel like anyone voting YTA did not read the post fully and assumed the bride does not want the bridesmaid to bring the dog AT ALL."

"And that is clearly not true."

"The bride says the dog at the wedding, to the side, is fine."

"But to be an active participant in the wedding ceremony and the photos is not."

"The bride doesn't want the dog in the photo, so why does she need to have photos with the dog to placate her friend?"

"It's not her friend's wedding, and it's not the friend who is paying for the photos either." ~ theflippingbear

"So many commenters lack reading comprehension."

"You didn't say that the service dog couldn't be present to do its job, just that you didn't want it to be an active participant in the ceremony or in the photos. NTA." ~ mvmgems

"I think the majority of people didn't actually read the post, because some of these comments are wild."

"The dog could be placed legitimately one foot out of the frame for photos and the ceremony. NTA." ~ be1izabeth0908

"NTA. You're not preventing her service dog from going."

"You just don't want it in pictures."

"It would be the same as not letting her date be in your pictures if they aren't part of the wedding." ~ isthatacorsage

"You're not asking her to leave the dog home."

"You just don't want him/her in photographs!"

"Your friend is being unreasonable. NTA." ~ NoSummer1345

"The friend wanting to dress up the dog is weird if it's a service dog instead of an emotional support dog."

"I don't know why more people didn't catch that it's allowed there, but not participating in the ceremony or pictures."

"I think that it's reasonable for a service dog not to be involved in a ceremony that's not about his person." ~ Impossible-Oven3242

"NTA and everyone saying otherwise is being ridiculous."

"I feel like they didn't read this at all."

"You're not telling her she can't have her service animal/medical equipment present."

"The dog just isn't walking down the aisle or being in photos."

"She can still dress the dog for a wedding to match her, and she can still have the dog sit at her feet to perform duties as needed."

"But the dog is not going to be part of the bridal party itself."

"And there's nothing effing wrong with that."

"And before anyone starts to flip out and white-knight, until December 2024, we had a service dog in our house for our child."

"This isn't discrimination; she's not being denied her dog, the dog is just not a bridesmaid." ~visceralthrill

"I agree."

"Comparing this particular dog to a wheelchair or an oxygen tank is not a fair comparison."

"If the friend were to start having a panic attack in the middle of the ceremony or during pictures, obviously, she should be able to have access to her dog."

"But she doesn't need the dog to be attached to her in order to stand at the altar or take a picture, unlike someone in a wheelchair or on an oxygen tank."

"If OP were banning the dog altogether, that would be an AH move."

"But surely the friend can participate in the ceremony and take some pictures without involving the dog. NTA." ~ cbm984

"NTA. If she had a sign language interpreter, would they be in the photos?"

"If it is a fully registered and trained service dog, someone should easily be able to bring the dog in and out of the picture-taking zone between takes, then."

"They can wait 5ft out of the frame." ~ bird-eating-ramen

"My dad has a fully-trained service dog for PTSD related to his service in the Gulf."

"The dog needs to be nearby."

"It does not need to be attached."

"She will be just fine with the dog sitting 10 feet away. NTA." ~ BeginningSun247

"NTA, I have no idea what people here are going on about."

"The dog is invited to the wedding for f**ks sake."

"It's okay to leave guests out of your pictures, and not all guests get their moment to walk down the aisle."

"You are not denying your friend her dog; you are just asking her to stand 15-20 feet away for 20-30 minutes for a ceremony and step away periodically for pictures."

"That is already very accommodating."

"If your friend isn't comfortable participating in the manner you have invited her to participate, she could have a different role."

"It would be much less stressful to be a guest with her dog than to be in a wedding if she can't be 20 feet away for half an hour." ~ miragud

"NTA. She needs the dog there."

"She doesn't need the dog beside her in the photos."

"And as for dressing the dog up - no."

"That's your choice, not hers." ~ AuroraDF

"NTA, insane that people think you should accommodate a dog in your wedding photos." ~ nat2bad

"NTA. The replies on here are wild."

"There is 0 reason for her dog to be in photos or a part of the ceremony."

"As long as the dog is near her and can do its job if needed, I don't see why anything else matters."

"It's also for PTSD, not a life-threatening condition."

"It's rough, but she isn't going to drop dead if the dog isn't right next to her the entire time."

"Does she generally take her dog with her everywhere?"

"To work, appointments, meals, hangouts at friends' houses?"

"This doesn't sound like she needs the dog to be heavily involved for her safety."

"It sounds like she's one of those people who treat their dogs like children and are shocked when nobody feels the same." ~ stalecigsmell

"NTA - I don't usually comment on posts like this, but I am so blown away by all of the responses that disagree."

"She's a close enough friend that you invited her to be a bridesmaid."

"You told her the dog is not a problem to come."

"You said the dog can be nearby during the photos."

"I think these are all reasonable asks. It is not her wedding."

"The dog doesn't have to be in photos to be servicing her a few feet away for a few minutes."

"People who are calling you ableist and equating a living dog to a wheelchair or hearing aid are blowing this out of proportion."

"Did anyone even read the post?"

"The dog is a welcome guest still and will literally be right there the whole time."

"Just because the dog isn't part of the ceremony or photos does not make you a bad person."

"If this friendship is important to you, allow the dog in and pay extra to photoshop it out."

"Let her keep the originals, and you keep one too, so she doesn't feel unseen."

"Wishing you a happy resolution and a happy life with your partner." ~ nooneaskedyou

"Why do people keep acting like the dog has to stay home?"

"The dog can come to the wedding, sit on the side, and I assume she can manage being no more than 5-10 feet away for 10-15 minutes. NTA." ~ Silent_Wrongdoer3601

"Not sure why everyone is flipping out over this."

"You're asking the dog to be off to the side, still in view for like 30 minutes of the day, total."

"She's not a friend if she's so self-centered that she needs her dog to take over someone else's wedding. NTA." ~ saucybishh

Reddit is with you, OP.

You're ok with the dog at the wedding. And you set the rules about photos.

It's YOUR special day.

Enjoy it. Congrats!

Many people dream of the names they will give their children long before becoming a parent is even close to being a reality.

Most of the time, inspiration for these names might be in tribute to someone who meant a great deal to them.

Of course, people who know what they want their children's names to be often forget that their spouse or co-parent might not be as fond of their chosen names.

Sometimes they may even be actively against it.

Redditor throwaway_4444444567 and his wife were looking forward to welcoming their first child.

The original poster (OP)'s wife was dead set on what their child's name should be.

Unfortunately, the OP was not on board with this name at all.

Specifically owing to this particular name's connotation.

Wondering if it would be wrong to address his concerns to his pregnant wife, the OP took to the subReddit "Would I Be The A**hole" (WIBTA), where he asked fellow Redditors:

"WIBTA for refusing to name my child after my wife's deceased dog?"

The OP explained why he was so vehemently against the name his wife wanted to give their child:

"I, 31 M[ale], am expecting my first kid with my wife of 2 years, 26 F[emale]."

"We have been together for 3.5 years."

"We met at a bar and instantly clicked."

"She has always wanted to be a mom and considers herself a 'maternal' person."

"She is 6 months pregnant, and it has been an easy pregnancy."

"We both have relatively established jobs and make well above our means."

"We both have debt remaining from school, but we make our payments on time, etc."

"All of this is to say that our relationship is stable and develope,d and there aren't really any external problems."

"Our families love each other, we have friends separate from each other, and everything is healthy."

"We have one problem, though."

"She is absolutely dead set on naming our kid after her deceased dog from when she was a child."

"I honestly think this is really strange."

"We are having a girl, and the name isn't a 'human' name (in my opinion)."

"I don't want to say exactly what it is, but it's pretty similar to Lucky."

"I feel uncomfortable about naming our daughter a dog name."

"I don't think that dogs' lives are less valuable than human lives; however, our daughter is going to have a life beyond us."

"I would be weirded out if I were named after a dog."

"I don't know how to approach this subject with my wife because she has wanted to name her future child after her childhood dog since she was a teenager."

"I don't want a blow-up fight over this, but I feel like this will affect our future child in the long term."

"WIBTA if I refused to name our kid after her dog?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

The Reddit community was in agreement that the OP would not be the a**hole for refusing to name his child after his wife's childhood dog.

Everyone agreed that the OP and his wife needed to be in 100% agreement on what their child's name was, with others agreeing that giving a child a name that sounded like a pet, but not a child, was bound to subject their child to bullying and embarrassment:

"NTA."

"Names are always 2 yes, 1 no."

"If you say no that should be it."

"That's so weird though, and I agree with you, I'd feel weird if I knew I was named after a dog."-WickedAngelLove

"NTA."

"But, maybe it's not bad enough to not be a middle name?"- Comfortable_Stop_717

"NTA."

"But people really need to start having this conversation before kids are involved."-Queen_Sized_Beauty

"NTA."

"Solely because naming a child requires two yeses."

"A single no and the name is vetoed."

"It's both of your children and you have to both agree on a name."

"Naming a child is the time when no one should give in to a name they don't agree on."-seecarlytrip

"NTA."

"Names should be agreed to by both parents."

"Funny enough, my dad told me once that my brother got his name bc it was one he wanted to use for a puppy, and my mom said it was too good a name to waste on a dog."- HerGrinchness

"NTA."

"Naming a child requires a yes from both parents."

"If you aren't on board with naming your child something, that's the end of it."

"You both need to work together and come up with something together."- LovingWisdom

"NTA."

"Check out r/namenerds and see if they can help you find a more human-sounding name."

"For luck, you could do Lacy or Lucille, and have luckY as a nickname."

"Or make it her middle name."

"For Spot, you could do Dorothy or Dot."

"Names should be two yeses."

"The kid is going to grow up and be an adult, not a dog."- vonshook

"I think you will be TA if you don't have thar conversation with your wife."

"You will be a parent soon, and you'll have to advocate for your baby when you think it's necessary, even against your wife (this can be done politely/gently, obviously)."

"It doesn't matter if it was a dog's name or not, what matters is if you want to name your kid that or not."

"Even if the dog's name was Julie, you can still say no."

"It should be a two-yes situation."

"NTA."

"Unless you don't say anything and protect your daughter from a name you find undignified."-Crazyandiloveit

"NTA."

"Parenting decisions aren't one person being to railroad the other to force them to give in."

"Names are two yes situations."

"You both get a say."- thewhiterosequeen

"NTA."

"If you don't like the name, then veto it."

"Perhaps it could be her nickname instead."- StormyKitten0

"NTA."

"Tell her she can use it for a middle name."

"And actually that isn't the oddest naming I've ever heard of."

"There was an actress in the 90s called Swoosie Kurtz."

"She was named after her father's B-17D Flying Fortress bomber, nicknamed 'The Swoose' that he flew in WWII."- Lilylake_55

"NTA."

"She needs to consider your child's future."

"The deceased dog won't care."- st0rmbr1ng3r

"NTA."

"But maybe there's a way to compromise or find a human name that's similar enough?"

"If it helps at all, the late great Steve Irwin named his daughter after his favorite crocodile (Bindi) and his favorite dog (Suey) in that order."- b00kbat

"Would you rather kick back now or explain to Rover how you got the name?"

"NTA."

"There are dog names and human names."

"If it's is truly a dog name, you need to have this conversation."

"It's also incredibly unhealthy for someone to that attached to a pet name from so long ago."

"Your kid deserves their own name."- whatsername235

"NTA."

"No matter what, naming a child is a two-yes-one-no situation."

"You've said no, she needs to find another name that you both like."- Decent-Caramel-2129

"NTA."

"Child names need to be 'two yeses, one no'."- Fearless_Spring5611

"NTA."

"Names, no matter how traditional, uncommon, wacky, or timeless, are a two yes situation from both parents."

"If any parent has a veto, the name is nixed."

"Plus, you are right that the child has that name for life."

"Does your daughter really deserve having to live by the name 'Lucky' for the rest of her life?"

"How seriously will she be taken?"

"That being said, a compromise MAY be reached here in that you could adjust the name to better suit a human, rather than a dog."

"If the dog's name was Lucky, could you maybe go with Lucy as an alternative?"- LittlestSlipper55

"NTA."

"I can already see the freak out your kid will have at like 13 when they find out she was named after a dog."

"It'll be one of those things she brings up to her mom periodically to remind her she is always mad at her on some level for it."

"And whenever someone asks her how she got her name she's gonna have to say 'my mom's dead dog', and she's gonna get asked a lot if it really isn't a human name."

"You need to explain to your wife that your kid will never have an emotional connection to the name that she does, cause she never knew the dog."

"All she'll know is that she was named after a literal dead animal."- malificus44

The OP later returned to thank everyone who took the time to comment, as well as reveal what the name he was so vehemently against actually was:

"Yes, the name is Lassie."

"I don't think this post makes sense without the context of the name."

"I am going to suggest alternatives to my wife tonight, such as Lacy or Lacie."

"I did not expect this post to blow up this much at al,l and it's difficult to read all of the comments."

"Thank you for all the advice though!"

It's not uncommon for new parents to want to give their child a name that honors someone, or even something that meant a lot to them.

Chances are, the OP's wife probably isn't even the first person to want to name her child after her dog.

That being said, the OP's wife might want to think about how many children named "Lassie" she's met or heard of.

As well as whether or not her daughter being the first child named Lassie would actually be a good thing...

There is nothing more frustrating and stress inducing than discovering you need to get out of your current living situation.

Even if you know doing so is a necessity for your health and safety, it's sadly not an easy thing to do.

As there are several factors that need to come into place before you can vacate your current residence.

Nor do certain people make fulfilling this necessary change as easy as it should be.

Redditor Agreeable_Sky_9983 discovered the hard way that staying in her current apartment was no longer possible.

While the original poster (OP) knew her roommate wouldn't be thrilled with this news, things ended up going far worse than she could have expected.

As the OP's demanded strict conditions for this to happen, even going so far as to threaten her.

Wondering if she was being unreasonable, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:

"AITAH? my roommate says I can't move out until after her wedding."

The OP explained why she wanted out of her current home, and why her roommate wasn't having it:

"I (34 F[emale]) have been living in hotels and with an ex partner for the last 4 months because my apartment tested positive for mold, which I'm highly reactive/allergic to."

"At the same time, my 5 year old dog suddenly became severely ill."

"Her x-rays showed alarming inflammation in her lungs and overnight she was struggling to breathe."

"I packed a suitcase and left immediately thinking the mold was affecting her also."

"My plan was to find another place to stay while our landlord remediated the house."

"Devastatingly, only 2.5 weeks later my dog passed away."

"Her passing was extremely traumatic for me, but I will omit those details."

"I was in a very, very dark place."

"Not only did I lose my bestfriend and was living out of a suitcase, I also found out some unfortunate news regarding my own health, all the while being unemployed and living on savings and some generous help from my ex partner."

"The night my girl passed away, my ex insisted I move into the extra bedroom of his apartment so I wouldn't grieve alone."

"He assured me that I could stay for as long as I needed to get back on my feet as well my house to be safe again."

"We get along super well, and I'm so grateful for his help."

"The whole time I've been here, both of my roommates have been constantly asking when I was coming back."

"Mind you, I've been paying my $2,200 rent plus utilities this whole time."

"I live in SF, lol."

"My answer has always been the same: I'm not coming back until the house is remediated."

"Unfortunately something was delaying the process of it all."

"Last week, I finally decided that I no longer wanted to pay rent for a place that I wasn't living in, especially because I was still unemployed. I knew the timing of my notice was less than ideal because my roommate 'Kate' (46 F[emale]), who is the master tenant and responsible for finding a replacement tenant, is in the throws of planning her wedding, amongst other things like talking to a surrogacy agency and immigration for her fiancé, and I feel awful."

"I knew that she wasn't going to take the news well, but her reaction was far more unexpected than I thought."

"When I told her I was moving out (7 week notice) she said that the timing didn't work for her and that I was being unkind."

"She threatened to keep my deposit if I didn't push my move out date by another month."

"When I told her that was illegal she started to freak out and told me that our friendship would be over."

"I was in shock."

"She said 'you knew about the wedding for months!', but I honestly didn't have the mental clarity to make that big of a decision until very recently."

"I told her as soon as I knew."

"I can't help but feel horrible and guilty, but all my friends are telling me 7 weeks is more than fair and she is the one being a bad friend."

"I just have no idea because they are obviously biased."

"I'm just so tired of being a people pleaser and I would essentially lose over $2k to make it convenient for her."

"AITAH if I don't push my move out date by another month?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

The Reddit community stood firmly behind the OP, agreeing that she would not be the a**hole if she moved out of her place prior to Kate's wedding.

Everyone agreed that not only was Kate being totally unreasonable, but that neither she nor the OP should even be paying rent right now if the mold situation was so bad that their home was uninhabitable:

"NTA."

"But i don't understand why on earth you are all paying rent to the landlord if its tested positive for mold?"

"You should all be renting an airbnb together or something and not paying for an unlivable house."-Queenasheeba99

"NTA."

"Hit up the San Francisco Tenants union for help."

"You have been super generous paying for a place you can't live in."

"Your (ex)friend should be grateful you have been paying despite not living there."

"Surely the landlord should be responsible for remediation and you should not be paying rent at this time."- MonkeyMom2

"NTA."

"Also speak with an attorney regarding the removal of all the mold in the home."

"If you can't live in the house because of the mold, you maybe able to get all your money back."

"Or not be responsible for the current rent."

"The mold is a landlord issue & if it's bad, no one should be living there."- MaeSilver909

"'She said the timing didn't work for her'."

"Not your problem."

"You've been waiting for the problem to be fixed, it hasn't been."

"You've been paying rent for a property you can't live in."

"NTA."

"Make sure you put it in writing, including the dates that you expect your funds back by."

"If you don't get them, up the ante."

"Her financial commitments are not your concern."

"She has plenty of time to find a new roommate."- use_your_smarts

"It sounds like you shouldn't be paying rent AT ALL since she hasn't fixed the mold issue that is making your housing unlivable."

"NTA."- Couch-Witch

"NTA."

"But you need a landlord/tenant lawyer yesterday."- CoastalLegal

"Don't feel guilty."

"If being a landlord is her job (sounds like it is at least one of them) it's not your problem to also be her friend."

"She is unprofessional for guilting you, not to mention a bit selfish for giving you sh*t knowing what you're going through with your health and dog and joblessness."

"You gave ample time for the notice and continued to pay everything on time."

"That's all your responsibility was. In your situation I would stop apologizing to her and ignore the guilt tripping."

"NTA and tell her she should be glad you didn't demand back pay for the months made your home inhabitable to you."- Overall_Fox_8262

"NTA."

"But you should not have been paying rent all these months for a house you could not live in due to mold."

"I think you can and should get this back from the landlord."- ScarletNotThatOne

"NTA."

"Read your lease."

"There you will find your notice period, and when you can move out."

"Everything else is NOT relevant."- k23_k23

"NTA."

"Kate has a lot on her plate?"

"Well, so do you!"

"You have significant health problems, you are out of work, and you are grieving."

"That's a lot to cope with."

"What's more, Kate had a lot more agency in choosing the things to load onto her own plate than you did in choosing the things on yours."

"You didn't choose to be allergic to mold."

"You didn't choose to lose your dog."

"And I'm guessing you didn't choose to be out of work."

"In contrast, Kate wants some consideration from you because she's talking to a surrogacy agency?"

"Well, that could be put on hold, for starters!"

"If you've been paying rent plus utilities for 4 months for a place you don't live in, all while unemployed, I think you've been more than fair to Kate."

"Get some advice from a tenancy support service, such as a tenants union or a lawyer."

"As long as you're meeting whatever legal obligations apply where you live, you can stop feeling guilty."

"If your friendship with Kate is over, it doesn't sound like much of a loss."

"All I know about Kate is what you've written in this post, and I can't say I'm warming to her."-ThisWillAgeWell

Finding a new roommate or tenant is certainly a stressful endeavor.

Even so, it's hard to fathom how Kate can still expect the OP to live in a place that was frighteningly hazardous to her health.

Not quite as unfathomable, however, as the fact that Kate, the OP and the rest of the roommates were still paying rent in an uninhabitable home.

Passengers board an airplane with an equal amount of excitement and dread.

Some people relish the chance to sit back and relax for a few hours, enjoying an opportunity to read, watch movies, or catch a few winks.

Others are so utterly terrified of flying that they find it impossible even to try and relax.

This isn't taking into account how their fellow passengers might behave.

Redditor Unique_Excuse4780 recently boarded a flight to Los Angeles.

After taking off, the original poster (OP) was less than pleased to see that the passenger across the aisle from them was breaking an in-flight rule.

The OP did not mince words to call them out, which was not at all appreciated by the rule-breaking passenger.

Having some doubts about his behavior, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where he asked fellow Redditors:

"AITA for telling a lady to put her dog back in the carrier on the airplane."

The OP explained why they felt the need to call out a fellow passenger on a recent flight:

"I (35 M[ale]) had to fly to LA this morning on Delta and I had an aisle seat."

"It was a smaller plane with 2 seats per side."

"No TV or Movies on this flight and I wasn't paying for WIFI, so just me and my music."

"Ten minutes into the flight, the lady (40's) across the aisle was moving around and trying to get in her personal item."

"She busts out a dog. In my head, i'm like What the F*ck."

"I'm not dog friendly so I tell the lady firmly, you better put the dog back in the carrier."

"She says its cramped in the carrier, and the dog would rather be in her lap."

"I tell her to put it away or this can be a bigger scene for you."

"She reluctantly put it away."

"The rest of the flight she would baby talk the dog and call me the a**hole."

"I complained to the flight attendants after the flight."

"AITA?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

The OP found little sympathy from the Reddit community, who largely had trouble sympathizing with anyone.

Just about everyone felt that the OP did not need to be as rude as he was to his fellow passenger, even if she was breaking the rules:

"NTA for asking her to follow the rules."

"YTA for being a d*ck about it."

"Ease up on the self righteousness and life will get a lot more pleasant for you generally."-
FewStill3958

"So you, a man, told a woman 'This can be a bigger scene for you' after you 'Firmly' told her what to do."

"Instead of calling a flight attendant. Instead of saying 'hey I'm afraid of dogs even small ones, would you mind putting him away' and allowing her empathy to take over, you decided to use your perceived power in this world to inform someone they may be in danger if they don't do what you demand them to do?"

"Think about this from any other perspective of someone who is larger than you telling you what to do right now without any kind of warning or previous conversation, and they are bigger than you, and they seem threatening."

"Does that seem like an a**hole?"

"Yes?"

"YTA."- Opbombshellivy

"YTA."

"Solely for your approach."

"What an insane way to speak to someone."

"You do sound like an a**hole."- RutilatedGold

"Tf is wrong with you."

"You realize you can communicate with people without being a jerk, right?"

"YTA for your unnecessary attitude."- DemureDamsel122

"YTA."

"You shouldn't be talking to people that way."- dontevercallmebabe

"YTA."

"I tell her to put it away or this can be a bigger scene for you."

"I see that you say you meant involving flight attendants, but... you didn't say that. It's unclear what you were envisioning by 'causing a bigger scene'."

"It definitely sounds threatening."

"This is a garbage way to communicate with people unless you intended to sound threatening, in which case, you're still an a**hole."

"I don't think you were wrong for wanting her to put the dog away, but if this is how you try to resolve conflicts you're clearly an a**hole."- BigBigBigTree

"YTA."

"OP is asking if they're an a**hole, not if he was right to point out policy."

"It's very clear the pet policy is written as is, and the pet owner should follow such."

"However, you handled the situation like a totally entitled a**hole."

"'I'm not dog friendly...'"

"Actually, you're just not friendly at all - an a**hole, if you will."

"'You better put that dog back in the carrier'."

"'Put it away or this can be a bigger scene for you'."

"These are not polite, non-a**hole ways to address the situation, and just because you're right doesn't mean you're not a total d*ck."

"If you had politely asked her to, 'please put the dog away' (or some variation of that) you would not be an a**hole."

"Hell, get the attention of the flight attendant and let them handle it."

"However, you flat out addressed the woman like a pissed off a**hole."

"The woman is wrong for taking the dog out, but sounded pretty non-confrontational."

"You're right in pointing out the policy, but you're still an a**hole."

"An E sucks Here would also qualify, but no way in hell are you clear of being an a**hole."-buttgers

"YTA."

"I'm not a dog person, at all. If the dog was climbing on me or licking me I'd have asked a flight attendant to intervene."

"But."

"If a small dog in someone's lap across the aisle from you was so terrifying that you needed to threaten the woman then I'd suggest getting some counseling to work through that."

"Threatening people because they're doing something you don't like, without even bothering to attempt to be civil or kind or going through the proper channels (alerting the FA) is always going to make YTA."- Acrobatic_Hippo_9593

"YTA for how you handled."

"While you're technically in the right, you threatened her, which is wayyy worse than taking a dog out and putting it on her lap."

"Ring for a flight attendant and let them handle it."- Whitecheddarcheezit3

"You're technically not the a-hole since this lady was breaking airline policy."

"But you sure sound like the a-hole the way you spoke to her."

"Seriously, is it that hard to ask nicely?"

"'Hey sorry, I'm really uncomfortable around dogs. Can you please put it back in the carrier?'"

"You honestly seem like an arrogant prick and the kind of person who looks for reasons to throw your weight around and start a fight - and that's according to your own version of the story."

"'Put it away or this can be a bigger scene for you'"?

"Really?"

"That's your conflict resolution style?"

"Jesus Christ."

"NTA for wanting the dog put away, but a definite AH for how you handled the whole thing."-ThePrefect0fWanganui

There were those, however felt that the passenger with her dog needed to be called out, even the OP could have done so more politely than he did:

"ESH."

"Because that lady should've kept her dog in the carrier (which is Delta's policy), and 'you better put that dog back in the carrier' is just not how you talk to other people when you want them to do something for you out of the gate."

"Next time just call the flight crew and ask them to handle it."- catslady123

"ESH."

"She should have kept the dog in its carrier, but there was no reason for you to get aggressive or threatening."

"A normal person would have called over a flight attendant and let them deal with it since it's, you know, their job."- Specialist_Badger934

"ESH."

"You're completely entitled to ask her to put the dog back in the carrier but 'put it away or this could be a bigger scene for you' is such an unnecessary, instant escalation of hostilities to the point of borderline menace."

"I mean, you're in a cramped space 30,000ft in the air."

"The normal thing would be to try a couple more exchanges along the 'I'm really sorry but I'm not good with dogs and would appreciate you putting them away' lines."

"After that, go ahead with the harsher response (although even then, asking the flight attendants to intervene is probably going to cause less trouble)."

"She's in the wrong to take the dog out of the carrier and then complain when someone asks her to put it back in, but from the way you've told the story I can't say I blame her too much for branding you an AH."- And_a_piece_of_toast

"ESH."

"You're in the right but an a**hole about it."

"I'm a pet owner who wishes I could put my dog in my lap but I won't because I follow the rules."

"The person on your flight gives us all a bad name, but neither of you come out looking great here."- mochafiend

Airlines don't require dogs to stay in carriers to be mean, but rather out of consideration for passengers with allergies or phobias.

However, this was something that a flight attendant on board could have let the passenger know.

Which they would have most likely done in a far more polite manner than the OP.

When people give warnings or instructions, they are not doing so simply to be mean.

Instead, they are looking out for people's health and safety.

Even so, countless people still tend to ignore these warnings.

Even more amazingly, when they find themselves facing consequences for their obstinacy, they often blame the very people who tried to warn them.

Redditor Pretzelmamma recently hosted a family gathering.

Upon the arrival of their guests, the original poster (OP) very sternly warned them to avoid doing one specific thing.

Unfortunately, their nephew ignored this warning, resulting in him finding one of his prized possessions in a less-than-hygienic situation.

When the OP's nephew demanded they replace this item, the OP had no interest in obliging.

Wondering if they were being unreasonable, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:

"AITA for not replacing my nephew's leather jacket after my dog had an accident on it?"

The OP explained why they had no intention of replacing their nephew's jacket:

"We have 3 dogs, 1 of which we took in recently when his owner died."

"He's nice but prefers quiet and when we have guests he will go upstairs to our bedroom and chill on our bed."

"Also, he's only ever had dry food and anything different upsets his stomach which causes a hygiene issue as he has long fur."

"This weekend we had family over and everyone brought food for a buffet, my 3 brothers, their wives and lots of adult / teen children."

"We've had issues previously where people don't listen to us about the dogs and sneaking them food is common so as they were coming in I was loudly announcing 'don't feed Pickles any treats or human food, anyone caught will be the one upstairs shampooing the poop out of his fur', My SIL Tracy laughed and made some comment about me being unnecessarily graphic so I pointed out that people hadn't listened in the past and I was not playing around this time because Pickles was more sensitive than our other dogs."

"Anyway later on my husband found a piece of sausage roll on the floor upstairs."

"Nephew Dave (19) admitted he'd tried to make friends with Pickles by giving him food."

"My husband and I were not happy but everyone else brushed it off as not a big deal."

"I went up to check on Pickles and that's when I realized that everyone had put their coats in our room when they arrived."

"They'd always done this in the past and honestly I never thought to tell them different."

"Anyway he'd obviously eaten something and got an upset stomach, not wanted to come downstairs with a crowd there so he'd had a small accident, some of which had got on Dave's leather jacket."

"He's never had an accident in the house before."

"I called my husband and took Pickles into the shower to get cleaned up."

"People came up to see what was happening and when Dave saw his jacket he was furious, raised voice and red faced accusing me of making the dog do it on purpose to prove a point."

"We cleaned it off with antibacterial wipes and it was fine, no smell or marks on the leather although obviously for hygiene reasons it would need cleaning properly."

"Well that was the end of the party, everyone left pretty quickly not wanting to be in the middle of it but Dave and Tracy stayed behind yelling until my brother persuaded them to leave saying we'd 'sort it out later'."

"It was a mess but honestly I thought it would blow over but it hasn't."

"Dave and Tracy are both texting me saying we need to pay £150 for a new jacket."

"I keep saying no it was his own fault and I was the one who ended up cleaning up poop."

"Husband was on my side at first but is wavering, he says we knew they'd ignore us and we should've taken more care to put the coats in another room."

"He said I'm focusing on being technically right, Dave is just a teen and this is not the hill we should die on."

"We can afford to replace it."

"Had Pickles chewed his coat I'd replace it in a heartbeat which makes me think maybe IATA."

"I offered to pay cleaning but that's not good enough for him."

"So, AITA?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

The Reddit community firmly stood behind the OP and agreed they were not the a**hole for refusing to buy their nephew a new jacket.

Everyone agreed that Dave very clearly ignored the OP's warning and should have accepted their offer to pay for the cleaning, which just about everyone felt the OP also wasn't obligated to do:

"You're NTA."

"'Dave is just a teen'."

"Is the bar that low now?"

"A teenager understands don't feed the dog people food because it upsets his stomach and causes a mess."

"He deliberately disregarded that and caused your dog unnecessary discomfort and you the trouble of cleaning up the mess."- Dittoheadforever

"NTA."

"19 years old is old enough to understand that actions have consequences."- Snarkyraccoons

"NTA."

"If anything, tell Dave you forgive him for making Pickles sick, and he's lucky he didn't have to foot the vet bill."

"He was instructed not to feed the dog."

"He did."

"How is any consequence your responsibility."- EwwDavvidd

"NTA."

"What part of 'don't feed the dog any treats or human food' do they not understand?"

"You made it a point to make sure everyone knew not to feed the dog and even warned them that they would have to pay should he have an accident."

"This is what you call Karma."

"Dave didn't want to listen, sweet pup had an accident on his leather jacket."

"Maybe next time he will listen."

"Although I highly doubt it."- SnooSprouts6437

"NTA."

"What stands out most to me, here, is the EXTREMELY AHishness of Dave and all your guests that you cannot trust them to follow your expressed statements regarding the pets."

"What if the pet actually had something more than a sensitive stomach and faced real medical harm as a result of your guests all thinking the proper thing to do is ignore a pet owner?"

"This should cause you to decide you cannot trust your family as guests in your home and not welcome there anymore."

"Whether you decide to replace the jacket to keep the peace or not, I could go either way."

"You DO NOT owe it to him but it might help you make your point."

"Like - here's the money but by the way, you're not welcome at our home any longer."-owls_and_cardinals

"op:Don't feed the dog."

"It upsets the stomach and he might poop and It'll get all over his fur and if you did it you will clean it up."

"Dave :oh it doesn't matter to me I'll feed him anyway."

"Op: someone fed the dog. He had an accident in the house. I cleaned them up so I didn't make you clean them up."

"Dave: The dog pooped on my coat you owe me money."

"The real world when the owner says don't feed the dog, you don't feed the dog."

"And a little bit of dog feces on a leather coat won't hurt anything."

"Get a leather cleaner."

"Rub it on the spot."

"You're fine."

"I would do two things in the future if I was op first, not give the sister-in-law or Dave a penny for the coat either to replace or clean."

"And second, I wouldn't invite those two over to my house again."

"NTA, and remember sh*t happens."- Even_Enthusiasm7223

"NTA."

"'Just a teen' but he's 19 y/o."

"The instructions weren't difficult at all for someone that age."

"However, Tracey is NOT a teen."

"But, op, since some people chose not to listen (literally or figuratively), you should take extra steps next time to protect your babies."- AilshaBilaiO_o

"NTA for the consequences."

"I do agree you should have informed everyone to put their coats elsewhere tho."

"But its really not a big deal."- ChrisInBliss

"NTA."

"You warned everyone, he did iit anyway."

"Something about actions having consequences."- Artistic-Apple-1005

"Ehhh nope NTA."

"If he has an issue with it, he can buy himself a new jacket."

"You explicitly told everyone not to feed the dog, yet he went behind your back and did it."

"He's 19, not 4."

"He knew the consequences of feeding the dog but didnt think the consequences would effect him."-ConsciousNectarine9

When anyone is nice enough to host us in their home, one would assume that the very least anyone could do is follow instructions.

If anything, Dave should consider himself lucky that the OP didn't follow through with their word and make Dave clean Pickles.

One would like to think that Dave learned his lesson, but seeing as he couldn't follow the OP's clear instructions, one can only guess that this isn't the case...

There are few connections more touching than that of a pet owner to their pet.

Be they dogs, cats, snakes or gerbils, some people's pets bring more happiness to them than any person they know.

Indeed, many people often sneer at those who share such a tight bond with their pets, that they may never want to leave their side.

Possibly stemming from jealousy.

Redditor Fit_Persimmon1467 had a dog with whom they shared a strong and devoted connection.

When a friend of the original poster (OP) paid a visit, this same friend's daughter also swiftly developed a strong bond with the OP's dog.

So strong, in fact, that the OP's friend was compelled to make a suggestion.

A suggestion the OP flatly declined.

Wondering if they were in the wrong for doing so, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:

"AITA for not giving my dog to my friend's kid who loves him?"

The OP explained why they were not willing to consider. their friend's proposal:

"I have a small dog named Max."

"He is very sweet and calm."

"I've had him for five years."

"My friend came to visit with her 7-year-old daughter."

"The daughter loved Max right away."

"They played all day."

"She even cried when they had to leave."

"A few days later, my friend called me."

"She said her daughter has never connected with a pet like that."

"She asked if I would let them have Max."

"I was surprised."

"I said no."

"I told her I love Max and he is a part of my family."

"She said she understood, but sounded sad."

"She said her daughter was heartbroken."

"Now I feel bad."

"I know they would give Max a good home."

"But I love him and don't want to give him away."

"Some people say I should have done it for the child."

"Others say it's okay to keep my dog."

"AITA?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA: Not the A**hole
• YTA: You're the A**hole
• ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
• NAH: No A**holes Here

The Reddit community overwhelmingly agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for refusing to give their dog to their friend:

Everyone agreed that no matter how much their friend's daughter loved Max, it couldn't be more than the OP loved him, and that didn't give them the right to simply ask the OP to give them Max:

"NTA even in the slightest."

"I cannot believe your friend even asked you this."

"Pets, for many people, are members of the family and the fact that she would even ask you to give up your dog to her child is bizarre if you were providing him a loving home."

"Also, giving someone a dog because their 7-year-old connected with it is a bad idea anyway."

"Kids go through so many phases and get busier with every stage of development."

"She very well may love the dog now, but if at 10 she's in gymnastics and soccer and dance or whatever, who likely suffers as a result?"

"Max."

"Keep your dog, give him love, and don't think twice about this."- Aggravating-Bench350

"NTA."

"WTF?! "

"Your dog is not a toy."

"Your dog is a living being with feelings who has bonded to you as his family/pack."

"You generally don't just give away family because someone else likes them and wants them."

"This child needs to learn two important lessons here: other people's belongings aren't up for grabs, and loving something doesn't make you entitled to it."

"The mother should have explained that to her rather than asking for your dog."

"The dog is a feeling living being, and his bonds and emotional needs should be considered."

"You don't treat animals like things; they shouldn't be rehomed based on a child's whim, only if it's really necessary for the good of everyone involved."

"You aren't entitled to other people's things, no matter how much you love them (including toys)."

"Asking for other people's things is bad manners and should be discouraged by the parents, not supported."- KaliTheBlaze

"WTF?"

"There are so many dogs in shelters that need good homes, the nerve of this person asking you to give up your very loved and cared for pooch is insane."

"Anyone saying you 'should have done it for the child' is equally insane."

"It's a living being not a stuffed animal."

"SMDH."

"NTA."- Libba_Loo

"NTA."

"The ONLY way the daughter is heartbroken is if the parent told them they were going to ask for the dog."

"There's an easy way to prevent them: don't tell the kid you're going to ask for the dog."

"So either they're manipulative, or could be smarter parents."

"I've had dogs. I got them from the shelter and they stayed until they died, age 14."

"They could pry my dog(s) from my cold dead hands."

"No one, no matter what sob story, would take away my girl/boys from me."- Lead-Forsaken

"NTA."

"That's insane."

"She can get her daughter her own dog."- lihzee

"NTA."

"This is ridiculous."

"At least the kid didn't really like your house, otherwise you'd be asked if you could move out."-diminishingpatience

"NTA."

"What an entitled parent?"

"Someone has to learn to tell their child 'no'."

"The audacity to ask someone else to give up a pet because their child wants it is truly insane."

"The kid needs therapy gift cards, I think."- H_Lunulata

"NTA."

"Kids love animals, that's just a fact."

"But asking you to turn over your pet just because their kid formed an attachment?"

"Entitled much."- AnonAnontheAnony

"NTA."

"Would you ever call someone to give you their kid because you had a fun day with them?"

"To a lot of people, pets are family."

"And your friend treated it like a toy for her kid instead of a living being with feelings who most likely would be very stressed by getting separated from you, their trusted environment, and routine."

"So the question itself is already ridiculous, but I also doubt she would be a good home if she treats pets that way."- Dafi30537

"'I've never seen my pet bond as well as she did with your child.'"

"'Can I have your child, please?'"

"NTA."- Man-o-Bronze

"OP I REALLY like your house."

"I've never connected with a house as much like this."

"Would you let me have your house?"

"Perhaps you could throw in Max."

"Maybe I'll feel the same."

"Ask your 'people'."

"Some will say you should do it."

"Those people should never be spoken to again."

"NTA of course."- blueflash775

"NTA, obviously."

"Ask your friend to give you her kid."- StandardRedditUser11

"NTA."

"Just ask your friend that since the dog loves the kid so much, they should give you the kid."

"Problem solved!"

"You're welcome."- jenkumjunkie

"NTA."

"Why would someone even ask that?"

"It's like asking someone to give them their child."- saxman522

"NTA."

"Offer to take her daughter to make the kid happy."- FoxyLady52

"WTF kind of question is that?"

"It's insane to even ask."

"Definitely NTA."

"Take the kid to a shelter and find your own pet."

"SMH."- Orion_23

"'Your 5-year-old daughter is the most well-behaved child I've ever met, and I really love playing with her! Can I have her?'"

"NTA."

"But your friend is."- jentasticC

"NTA."

"Lol."

"Ask if you can have her daughter."

"Show her how ridiculous her ask is."- Eastern_Condition863

"Not the a**hole."

"I can't believe someone would ask that."

"That's so rude."- VerbenaVervain

"Of course you're NTA for refusing to give the kid your dog, but something ain't right if you really think you may be."- CultSurvivor3

"Tell your friend that if her daughter loves Max so much, she should just give her daughter to you."

"NTA."- PerturbedHamster

"NTA."

"LOL, no."

"Expecting someone to give you their beloved dog is flat-out delusional."

"I sincerely hope this is made-up drama."- Pascale73

"NTA."

"Tell the friend how much Max loved her daughter."

"Ask her if you can have her kid to make Max happy."- justloriinky

"NTA."

"WTF. "

"Some of these stories sound so bizarre/made up."

"I think the sense of entitlement has exploded in society. "

"The audacity is astounding."- DragonBall4Ever00

"NTA."

"Call her back and tell her that Max really likes her daughter, so could she give her daughter to Max."- waterstone55

"NTA."

"I would be so angry if someone pulled this crap on me, they'd never be allowed in my home again or near my dog"

"And if that ended the friendship, GOOD!"- spaceylaceygirl

There is simply no hiding or avoiding your feelings when you fall in love, be it with another human being or a dog.

However, even if it was love at first sight between Max and the daughter of the OP's friend, that still doesn't mean she is entitled to take him and keep him for herself.

One would think that this friend would have at least offered to purchase Max and not simply expected him to be given over.

Helping people out financially can be a slippery slope.

It's in most people's nature to do so whenever asked... whether or not they can afford to do so.

Where it can and often does get people into trouble, however, is when they do it often enough, people start to expect that help.

Sometimes not even thinking to ask before taking money.

The mother of Redditor D*ckcystmcgee often relied on the original poster (OP) for help.

While the OP initially didn't mind offering her help, things took a turn for the worse when the OP's mother took money out of a shared account without consulting her first.

Money the OP was saving for a very important reason.

Leading the OP to take somewhat drastic measures against their mother.

After being scolded by their family, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:

"AITA for pressing charges against my mom for stealing money from my dog's surgery fund?"

The OP explained why they found themselves taking legal action against her mother:

"My entire family is calling me selfish and greedy for doing this."

"This all came to a head yesterday, but here is some backstory: my mom decided to use my shared account (she has her own card, but it's my name on the account) with her to buy over $5k in products for Avon because she believes it's going to change her life."

"This is a Latino household, and for the longest, I've given her access to my account because sometimes I help with bills and what have you."

"But I've been saving money because my dog needs a liver shunt surgery, scans and recovery meds."

"She took it upon herself to take the money and won't give it back. My entire family is calling me crazy for prioritizing my dog over my mom."

"This came to a head when I called the police about it."

"They said it's a civil issue, but my family HATES me now."

"My little brother said I'm a huge a**hole."

"AITA?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA: Not the A**hole
• YTA: You're the A**hole
• ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
• NAH: No A**holes Here

The Reddit community resoundingly agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for pressing charges against her mother.

Just about everyone agreed that what the OP's mother did was theft, plain and simple, and the OP took the only possible course of action under the circumstances:

"JFC no."

"NTA."

"Parental theft of money is NOT F*CKING OK."

"It happens so often, and kids just take that kind of abuse on the chin."

"I saw your other post and felt for you."

"The text messages were spot-on what I would expect."

"Good on your for taking action."- Forsaken-Sink3345

"NTA."

"She didn't put any money into it, and it was being saved for something life-saving."

"It's not like she used it for bills, food, or something medical for herself. She used it on what's likely an MLM."

"She's selfish, and a thief."- Neppetaa

"So wait — your family says that you're prioritizing your dying dog over your mom, WHO BOUGHT $5,000 WORTH OF AVON CRAP?"

"Avon products are not a NEED. I would be livid, and I'd probably be willing to lose my family over it."

"NTA."- valkyrieway

"NTA."

"This isn't about choosing a dog over family it's about theft and broken trust."

"Your mom took your surgery money without permission, and that's damn wrong."-Arorua__Mendes

"NTA."

"Let's call it what it is...theft."

"She STOLE $5000 from you for some Avon products."

"Not for food, or a new roof, or to replumb the entire house because there's a leak under the house, and all of the corroded pipes need to be replaced."

"She took it for Avon!?"

"Even if there had been an actual household emergency or family emergency that would have been a worthwhile investment, she should never have taken that money without your consent."

"Please file against her for small claims court, and, for god sake, take her name and information off of any accounts that you currently have shared with her."

"Good luck!"-Jovon35

"NTA at all."

"She should never have access to your money ever again, and it's time to let her know she has lost your trust."

"I hope your dog is okay."- spookyookykittycat

"NTA & Avon is a MLM; your mom will likely not be able to make back much (if any) the money she stole."- VironLLA

"NTA."

"I mean, come on, dude, do you even need our opinion?"

"Over 5,000 US Dollars?"

"Press the charges."- -w1tch

"NTA at all, especially over Avon products?"

"You were saving YOUR money for YOUR dog's surgery and she basically stole that."

"It's a huge violation of trust as well."- Free_Seaworthiness28

"NTA."

"Dogs are family too."- Alternative_Crab_367

"NTA."

"If your family cares that much, THEY can pay for her Avon crap."- testever

"NTA."

"But get a new account at a different bank, and DO NOT give her access to it."

"Since she was on this account, she can technically drain it, and that sucks because there's not much you can do about it."

"If she does not pay you back, please do not give her any more money."

"Personally, I would go NC over this with her and anyone who thinks she's right."- ChicagoWhiteSox35

"In the story as told, NTA."

"She stole your money, won't give it back."

"It's not anyone's business what you do with it except you."- Jeffrey_Friedl

"NTA."

"I'd tell her to start selling now."

"Avon is mlm."- Key_Step7550

"Some years back as my mom started getting older she did stuff like added my sister to her bank accounts so she could get assistance with stuff."

"It turned out a few years later that my sister had been stealing from it."

"As he or not legally stealing because it's joint access but just using mom's money to buy stuff."

"They have been living beyond their means for a while and stopped getting support from the other side of the family and just decided to find another way they could get money, ethics be damned."

"They were also jerks in other ways that are decided that we're terribly offensive to them so it was easy but I have entirely cut off contact with them and have no plans to ever forgive them for this sort of egregious and repeated behavior."

"Plan on being extremely rude to them if they show up for the funeral whenever that happens."

"Super duper NTA and your whole family sounds toxic as hell."

"Be careful how much you're in contact with them, don't believe anything they say, and for the love of God make sure they don't have the slightest access to your funds or property or anything because they have all just shown they can't be trusted."

"All good wishes for your dog."- shoobe01

"NTA and my heart breaks for you, but if her name is also on the account, she legally has access to it and technically didn't commit a crime."

"There are no charges to press."

"You need to open a new account at an entirely new bank (if you previously had Bank of America, go to Chase, for example) so she can't access your money anymore."

"I'm so sorry your mom is a selfish dumba**."- BufferingJuffy

"NTA."

"She stole your money."

"It doesn't make any difference what you were going to spend it on."

"She is a thief."

"Take the remaining money and close the account."

"Sit down with her and set up a repayment plan."- feminist1946

"NTA."

"When our dog needed $4000 surgery, we didn't blink an eye."

"Does that tell you whose side we are on?"- Dog_Concierge

"Nope, NTA."

"I saw your post the other day as well and you are 100% right."

"I can't understand how the cops say it's a civil matter?"

"She literally stole money from you!"

"What's going to happen to your pupper?"- Kayhowardhlots

"NTA but, mom having access and a card to the account, and if there is no paperwork stating what the bank account is for, I think it'll be an uphill battle for you."

"Especially as you have your family against you."

"I'm not saying don't do anything, I'm saying if to do you need to shore up and think things through very carefully."- Key-Ad-5068

"NTA, and I'd make sure that everyone she tried to sell to knew that she got started with money she stole from you that was being saved for your dog's liver surgery."- debinprogress

It's hard to imagine how the OP's mother could have felt that buying beauty products took precedence over literal life-changing meds and procedures for the OP's dog.

Or that she felt it was ok to take money that wasn't rightfully or legally hers.

Or how the OP's family seemed to focus on the OP's dog, and not that the OP's mother took the OP's money.

The OP's mother was at least right about something... buying those Avon products did fundamentally change her life.

People and their pets... that can be a complicated discussion in public.

A lot of people feel like they are parents when they care for an animal.

The terms "fur baby" and "fur parent" are popular titles in this day and age.

But just because that is how a person acknowledges themself, does it mean everyone must act accordingly?

Redditor InitialSong2898 wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback, so naturally, she came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

She asked:

"AITA for telling my D[aughter]-I[n]-L[aw] she is not a mother?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"I (64 F[emale]) have three kids and they are all married."

"This post is about my son and his wife, Jenny."

"Jenny struggles with infertility, and she has no children."

"My other son (DIL is expecting next month) and my daughter has recently had her own kid (my grandson).

"Everyone was busy for Mother's Day, and they couldn't meet up with me for the holiday (that's fine; they are starting their own families)."

"I thought it would be nice to send my expecting DIL/son and my daughter a Mother's Day basket."

"So Jenny always made comments that her two dogs are the first grandkids, I always thought it was a joke."

"She is big on being a dog mom."

"My daughter posted a picture in the group chat of everything she got for Mother's Day and included the basket. "

"My other DIL also thanked me for her basket in the chat."

"Jenny called me soon after and asked where her basket was."

"I was confused and asked what she meant (I thought she was pregnant, and she was just telling me now)."

"She clarified since I have two grandkids by her already and said her dog's names."

"I was even more confused at this, and she clarified that she was her dog's mother and should have gotten a basket."

"I told her she is not a mother, Mother's Day is for women who raise human children and not pet owners. "

"She got really upset and cursed me out for not getting her a basket and that she is a parent."

"My son is telling me to apologize and to send a Mother's Day basket over."

"He is calling me a jerk for not sending her a basket and telling her she is a pet owner."

The OP was left to wonder:

"So, Reddit... AITA?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"NTA. I understand that her infertility might be hard for her, and she loves her dogs, but at the end of the day, it really doesn't make her a mother."

"While people may love their pets (I love my dog), the reality is they aren't children." ~ AiofeCherish

"I think this should be a legitimate worry - it's clearly an extremely sensitive time right now."

"The other DIL is pregnant and the daughter's baby is fresh, so it sounds like a very raw moment for this DIL."

"I commented lower down about my aunt and uncle who were estranged from my grandparents and vice versa for very similar reasons."

"My aunt never made the kind of nutty demands that OP's daughter-in-law is making (she suffered in silence) but the insensitive comments in the early years of her coming to terms with their infertility really did irreparable damage to their relationship."

"The comments my grandparents made weren't on the face of it that bad - things like just talking too much about the other babies, commenting on how quiet their house was, etc."

"My uncle tried to warn them but instead of listening and taking on feedback, my aunt was constantly dismissed as being over-sensitive."

"I think the real damage was not the comments themselves, but their unwavering sense of self-righteousness, dismissal of her feelings, and inability to fully empathize."

"I think OP should be really careful, even if she doesn't agree, she should ask herself whether the relationship with her son as well as the DIL is worth risking." ~ restless-researcher

"As a 40-year-old with no children (by choice!) and 3 cats, I would never expect someone to acknowledge me on Mother's Day."

"I kind of would be a little weirded out if they did."

"I consider my cats my babies, but that's a personal thing that I would never expect anyone else to acknowledge or honor."

"My only thought is maybe the infertility thing is really affecting her emotionally, and it's manifesting itself in this odd way." ~ Yosemite143

"I 100% agree with this - presumably this is also the daughter and other DIL's first Mother's Day being celebrated, with one being very pregnant and the other with a newborn."

"That must be such an incredibly difficult time for someone struggling with infertility."

"And, for Jenny/son to have been trying long enough to know there are infertility problems, she probably started out thinking that she and her husband WOULD be the first ones to give OP grandchildren and now, not only is that not the case as there's a baby in the family, there's also another one imminently arriving."

"I think NAH."

"Jenny could have reacted differently, but so could OP."

"I've gone NAH rather than ESH because I think they were both doing their best in the circumstances."

"OP, it is so incredibly difficult when going through infertility to watch people around you get to experience what you're so desperately hoping for; sometimes it just bubbles over too much and some days (like Mother's Day itself, never mind with almost two brand new babies in the family) are just too hard to practice grace."

"She shouldn't have lashed out but I think her family could have shown some sensitivity." ~ Plastic_Melodic

"NTA. But... Since she struggles with infertility and Mother's Day and knowing your other DIL is pregnant must be very hard for her it would have been a nice gesture." ~ InAppropriate-meal

"A woman really in her feelings over being infertile on Mother's Day."

"Obviously, DIL is in the wrong, and op is NTA, but this seems like one of those times to worry less about who's the AH and have some compassion."

"It doesn't need to be a basket, but maybe something to show you care."

"Then again like I said DIL is off base, OP can also just leave this one be." ~ padfoot211

"Technically NTA, but I'm sure with her infertility struggles, Mother's Day is a really difficult day for her."

"It'd be nice to acknowledge her feelings in some way." ~ Ok_Impression_7737

"NTA... but you could have been a lot more kind."

"Struggling with infertility can be a relentless emotional agony."

"The main reason I think you are not the a-hole is because you didn't bring it up in the group chat -- that really falls on your daughter."

"And then, it's wild to think that your DIL would demand to know where her basket is, again in the group chat."

"Super awkward."

"I can see why, when this was sprung on you unexpectedly, you reacted bluntly."

"But still, overall, she doesn't need an explanation of how Mother's Day is defined."

"Trust me, she knows, and it probably eats at her heart."

"If attaching some of her coping strategies to her dogs is helping her, anything you can do in the future to support her would be a kindness."

"You don't have to believe dogs are equal to human children to do this, you don't even have to go all out on the concept, but you could respond with a little empathy."

"Her husband should also support her by gently and respectfully asking his siblings to be more mindful of how things like this play out in the group chat." ~ madra_crainn

"NTA. I'm sympathetic to her struggles, but she is being unreasonable."

"As much as I love dogs, dogs are not human children."

"It makes no sense to expect a Mother's Day gift if you have never been pregnant or adopted children."

"She probably needs counseling." ~ thechaoticstorm

"Jeebus... Does your son demand a basket on Father's Day?"

"Do they celebrate the dogs' birthdays and expect equal gifts for the canine and human grandchildren?"

"Your son and DIL need counseling more than a gift basket."

"NTA, they're unhinged and delusional." ~ pnwwaterfallwoman

"NTA. As harsh as it may sound, Mother's Day is about Mothers who are human and have human babies, whether biologically, through adoption, surrogacy, or fostering, it is meant for human mothers."

"You can love your pets like your child but that doesn't mean others have to follow the same narrative."

"Being a parent to a pet and to a human are two vastly different things."

"They cannot be compared, no matter how hard we try."

"I don't think that you should apologize to your DIL or give her a gift basket."  ~ BoredofBin

"NTA, but I think it was insensitive of your daughter and DIL to post a picture and thanks in the group chat."

"They should have had respect for Jenny's fertility struggles and thanked you privately." ~ Maximum-Ear1745

"All these NTAs are kind of crazy to me."

"Yes, pets are not human children, but for some people, especially infertile couples or even young couples starting off their family journey with pets, their fur babies are just as important."

"Maybe you didn't have to give her the same level of gift as the other 2, but it would have been nice to include her." ~ Freesiacal

"NTA for sending no Mother's Day basket, but yes, you are the a-hole for rubbing it into her face that she struggles with infertility and that she's not a real mother, you are really, really, reallyyyyyy an a-hole for that one, especially because you know about it." ~ CrazyLady2900

"NTA. Just because DIL believes her dogs are her children doesn't make it so."

"You don't have to play along." ~ Every-Spell4684

"NTA. Dogs, bless them, are not children and DIL's delusion of motherhood is not particularly healthy and shouldn't be indulged."

"Stay kind and try to get past this."

"But hold your ground." ~JoeLefty500

"NTA. Yes, infertility is hard, and everyone deals with it in their own way, but raising a pet is VERY different from raising a child." ~ starry-skyline

"I straight up call my dogs my babies in front of my human child (lol), and I still would not call myself a mom if I didn't have a kid."

"I love my kid, I love my dogs, but having a dog is not the same as parenting a child, and I would never expect a gift for owning a dog. NTA." ~ bentscissors

"NTA... She needs help to deal with her infertility." ~ ProfessorDistinct835

Reddit understands your feelings, OP.

It is unfortunate that your son and DIL are struggling with infertility.

But that doesn't mean they get to lash out.

Also, the relationship between people and their pets is a very real connection.

You're not mocking hers.

It's very easy to find yourself in an "eye-for-an-eye" mentality.

Hell-bent on giving people who wronged you their "just desserts," as it were.

However, as satisfying as revenge may seem, it seldom pays off.

Particularly if the offending parties don't actually deserve what's coming to them.

Redditor PerfectAffect9213 had not gotten over her older sister letting her down on a very important day.

As a result, when the original poster (OP)'s sister requested her support, the OP flatly refused.

Not hiding her reasons for doing so from her sister.

Having some doubts as to whether or not she made the right decision, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:

"AITA for telling my sister I wont be her maid of honor because she didnt come to my wedding due to her dog dying?"

The OP explained why she felt anything but obligated to be her sister's maid of honor:

"So I (28 F[emale]) got married last year."

"It was a small but beautiful ceremony with our closest family and friends."

"My older sister (32 F[emale]) and I have always had a complicated relationship. We're close, but she's also extremely emotional and kind of dramatic."

"She was supposed to be my maid of honor."

"Two days before my wedding, her 14-year-old dog passed away unexpectedly."

"I was obviously sympathetic, but she called me sobbing, saying she couldn't emotionally handle coming to the wedding because she was too devastated."

"I tried to talk her down, even offered to have someone bring her home early if it was too much, but she refused and didn't show up."

"It hurt."

"A lot."

"She missed one of the biggest days of my life, and I had no maid of honor."

"We didn't talk much after that."

"A few months ago, she got engaged and just last week asked me to be her maid of honor."

"I told her I couldn't."

"I said I still felt hurt she missed my wedding, and while I love her, I just couldn't pretend like everything was fine."

"She got extremely upset, said I was being cold and petty, and that her dog was like her child."

"Our parents are pressuring me just to be the bigger person."

"I honestly don't know anymore."

"AITA for saying no?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

While the Reddit community was somewhat divided, they generally agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for not being her sister's maid of honor.

Some felt whether or not the OP was the a**hole depended on her reasons for saying no:

"If you're doing this out of spite, then YTA."

"If you are sincerely declining because you don't want to uphold all the duties & obligations of being the maid of honor, then NTA."- Youwhooo60

Others didn't think there were any a**holes in this situation, feeling the OP's sister probably made the right call pulling out if she was overcome with grief, but also feeling if the OP didn't think she could adequately fulfill her duties, she did the right thing by saying no as well:

"NAH."

"It was very bad timing but no one's fault."

"She would have been a terrible MOH while dealing with that initial grief, so it's probably for the best she wasn't there sobbing next to you."

"It sounds like she never acknowledged how much her absence hurt you though."

"If you can't be there for her in good conscience, then declining is appropriate. However, the bitterness you hold against her won't be satisfied."- RealTalkFastWalk

"Might be controversial, but I'm going to say NAH."

"She's allowed to grieve her dog and be emotional."

"It may have been for the best that she wasn't there."

"You're allowed to be hurt she wasn't at your wedding."

"I do think you could be kinder in the way you speak about her, but I can also imagine that comes from a place of frustration."- Neither_Ad_173

Then some felt the OP was justified in refusing to be her sister's maid of honor, owing to their altered relationship which the OP's sister was responsible for changing:

"I planned my wedding for a year and a half."

"The entire time planning I was worried because my favorite Aunt and Godmother had a dying dog."

"I figured with a year and a half before the wedding, it wouldn't likely be an issue."

"Well my Aunt couldn't handle putting the dog down until it got to the point that the dog was in agony."

"She finally did put him down, and it was the literal week of my wedding."

"Her dog was her baby, she never was able to have kids, and she was devastated."

"But she never once considered missing my wedding because of it."

"I told her the same thing you told your sister."

"That she could leave early if she needed to."

"That it was OK if she cried during the wedding about her dog because I understand how hard it is to lose a pet."

"Our entire family rallied around her and made sure she had support at any point she needed it that day."

"I wasn't mad or jealous that she took attention away from me on my wedding day because I love her and I wanted her to be well taken care of."

"I never took any pictures with her because she wasn't feeling up to it, and I didn't care because she was still there for me on my wedding day."

"It's been years, and she regrets not taking any pictures together that day."

"Even though she knows it was because she was puffy-eyed and sad, she hates that she's the only one in the family who doesn't have a picture of that day with me."

"Her grief was and is very real, but it's the only wedding I'll ever have (hopefully lol), and she lost out on having a picture with me in my wedding dress (which she bought for me as a wedding gift)."

"I understand your sister was devastated, but her actions altered your relationship forever."

"You are allowed to keep her at arm's length because she missed the biggest day of your life."

"You do not owe her the courtesy she couldn't give you for her wedding."

"Keep your boundaries and protect your peace."

"And one day, you may come to regret your decision, but that's your burden if it does happen."

"Overall NTA."- WatchTheGoldenGirls

"Why is it always the person who was wronged that is expected to be the bigger person?"

"She's lucky you didn't say yes and then back out two days before the wedding."

"NTA."- thisisstupid-

"NTA."

"My Dad died 5 days before my nieces wedding, we ALL went including my Mom."

"It was hard, but it was the right thing to do."

"Your sister sucks."- ucancallmevicky

"You don't need to go through her wedding seething with resentment and rethinking bitter memories."

"NTA."

"No is a full sentence."

"Actions have consequences, and she should have sucked it up for your big day."-
Fluffy_Job7367

While a few thought the OP was the a**hole, finding her reasons for not being her sister's maid of honor were petty and spiteful:

"Gently, YTA."

"I think she couldn't win, really."

"It was only 2 days after her dog passed."

"She wasn't ready."

"Either she skips your wedding, and you're mad about that, or she comes to your wedding, breaks down, and ends up drawing attention whether she really intends to or not."

"You'd probably be even madder about that."

"The fact of the loss sucks, and the disruptive timing sucks, too."

"It's rough losing a beloved pet."

"And it's a disenfranchised loss - the reaction of too many is that it's 'just' a dog, 'just' a cat, etc."

"While it's not the same as a parent or a child, it's still a significant loss - especially so soon after the fact."

"And it's a being, a life you were responsible for, you know?"

"It can be a complicated grief because there's often a guilt which comes with it, rational or not."

"You don't just bounce back in 2 days."

"I think that's what she was trying to express by saying the dog was like her child."

"As a society, we don't tend to give people nearly enough grace for grieving the loss of a pet."

"For her wedding, you don't feel like you can fulfill the duties."

"So don't."

"But please don't let it be out of spite."

"I'm so sorry your wedding was affected by the loss of her dog."

"I wish you'd resisted the impulse to make sure it impacts her wedding, too."

"Now she's grieving all over again, not just the dog, but the damage to your relationship, which is so clearly linked to that, when she should be preparing for her own wedding."- PinkNGreenFluoride

The OP has every right to be hurt by her sister's leaving her high and dry on her big day.

But the OP should ask herself whether refusing to be her sister's maid of honor will make her feel better.

After all, unlike the OP, her sister ultimately didn't back out of the wedding out of malice or revenge.

I travel by train whenever possible. I love train travel.

One thing I always do is pay the few extra dollars for trip insurance. That way, if I have to cancel for any reason, I get a full refund.

Stuff happens in life.

A brother dealing with family vacation drama turned to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subReddit for feedback.

Moist_Ad4128 asked:

"AITA for not giving back 7K from a vacation reimbursement so my brother can pay vet bills from his dog?"

The original poster (OP) explained:

"Last summer, a family vacation was planned for my family (male, 40, my wife, and 2 kids) my brother's family (male, 33, his wife, 1 kid), and our parents. The plan was to go to Maui in May 2025."

"It's easily the most expensive trip any of us have been on. A fishing trip with dad was booked, a very expensive Vrbo was booked, and final payment occurred last month, and at that point could not be canceled."

"These shared costs were put on my credit card and I was fully reimbursed by all parties for their share."

"Last week, my brother's Black Lab had a severe health issue. The dog was 6 years old and unfortunately it passed."

"I got word of it and sent my condolences. A few days later, I got a phone call from my brother."

"Essentially he went all out trying to save the dog and has a significant vet bill coming his way."

"He informed me that him and his family are backing out of the trip. He asked for his money back that he paid me."

"Needless to say, a disagreement occurred between us. He thinks because he canceled he should be reimbursed."

"My family and our parents will still be going. The trip can't be changed at this point."

"They paid a share of the Vrbo. The fishing trip was a gift for our dad. He is coming at me because he paid me money."

"They helped pick the Vrbo. Not the first time they've used Vrbo either. They know the closer to the trip, the less likely it is to be refundable."

"Everyone was on their own for flights. Food costs and some experience costs have not been committed yet. Those don't factor in here."

"Splitting just the Vrbo to reimburse him means thousands more I'm paying for. I mean, I don't want to increase my trip cost by 5K to help my brother out."

"I'm not reimbursing him—I'm not about to pay another 7K (all the nonrefundable costs) out of my pocket."

"I told him absolutely not. He's called me an a**hole and threatened small claims court."

"It's been a pretty toxic last few days. He refuses to consider going, citing finances, emotional distress from the dog, and he doesn't want to be around me."

"Am I the a**hole here?"

The OP summed up their situation.

"AITA for arguing with my brother over money? I might be the a**hole because I refuse to pay back almost 7K for a vacation he is not going on."

"Arguing with him when he is emotional over the death of his dog. I'm putting him in a tougher financial hole since he owes a large vet bill."

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA - You're The A**hole
• NAH - No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).

"NTA. These were nonrefundable costs, and that is how life works. I assume any trip I back out of, I am not getting a refund."

"Now, it would be good for the rest of you going to chat about what you COULD refund him. If changes can be made to certain things, like excursions, where you could get a refund for his part, then try."

"If all the family members are willing to kick in a little to cover part of the house rental, then that would be nice."

"If there are ways to help your brother, you should all consider doing so, but no, he can't get money for the nonrefundable stuff back." ~ mfruitfly

"I agree the brother should have done the legwork & not pinned it all on OP (NTA), but I'll give the brother a pass because his dog died."

"I think it's a healthier decision for everyone to bring the group together & try to work out what they can. That includes the brother working out a payment plan with the vet though." ~ dilletaunty

"So tell him you don't have his money to give back to him. VRBO has it and they won't give it back…" ~ NeedARita

"If he had booked the trip himself, he'd be out the money just like now, but somehow since he paid it to you, he expects you to pay him back, when that's not how it works."

"His situation sucks, but that's how life works sometimes. You simply don't have the money to give back to him since it has already been used to pay for the trip."

"The money you used at first to book it was a loan to him, not extra money you had." ~ ForgottenChangeling

"Definitely an unfortunate situation and I feel terrible for your brother and his family. But his money is gone, it's already been used by him to reserve this trip and it's not reasonable for him to expect you to eat the cost."

"The one thing that might help this situation is if any of you were smart enough to book the trip with travel insurance. Even if you didn't purchase it separately, many travel credit cards offer this automatically."

"So you might need to do some research based on your cards. I really hope that this route works for you so he can get at least a partial reimbursement." ~ MustangTheLionheart

"NTA. I've been in that dog situation. There exist companies that'll do payment plans for massive vet bills... though in all honesty I regret not just letting the poor girl pass in peace."

"It's an emotional time for your brother, hopefully he cools off eventually. Though I admit that threatening court for something that he consented to happen is kind of funny." ~ Quinzal

"Same. Spent over $4,000 for chemo for our 5-year-old pit/boxer and she went downhill halfway thru, so I get why his brother is upset, but the brother needs to figure it out."

"He can't expect other people to put themselves in a bind because he's in a bind." ~ InformationUnique313

"NTA. You aren't keeping his money. The money was nonrefundable. It's unfortunately that he lost his puppy but you didn't have anything to do with it." ~ Ok-Cheetah-9125

"OP isn't keeping money, the money has been spent on the vacation and the window for reimbursement from cancelling on time has passed."

"The loss of the dog and subsequent vet bills was an unexpected blow, but it's neither OP's fault/problem, nor is there any way for OP to get the money back without shelling out money from his own pocket."

"OP, my advice to your brother would be, 'Find someone else who would like to take your spot that the family would be OK with having on a family event and have them pay to take your spot. Otherwise, this is a vacation already paid for. I'm not keeping our money from you, you've spent that money on a trip you now don't want to go on'."

"Speaking to his vet about a payment plan for this bill, and a possible discount if paid in full due to the loss of the pet would be the way to go. NTA." ~ Discount_Mithral

"We went through something similar. Cat had emergency surgery to the tune of $6K. You know what we did? We paid the vet with our credit card and paid off the credit card when we could."

"Sh*t like this happens when you own pets. He made the decision to spend money he apparently didn't have to spare on the trip and then spend it again on the dog."

"Now his poor decision making is YOUR problem? Got to love relatives. This is why I don't do trips with relatives any more. They just break your heart." ~ anonanon-do-do-do

"NTA. If you could cancel his part of the trip and still chose to not reimburse him, it would be different. But it sounds like nothing can be canceled or changed at this point."

"If you gave him his money back, you'd be out the 7k and that isn't fair to you as you weren't the one to initially book his portion of the trip or choose to try every effort to save his dog."

"And 7k isn't such a small amount that people would be willing to cover. It sucks, but he will have to figure out his finances without expecting you to cover the costs." ~ X-cited

"Did you tell him that you don't have the money anymore and it is physically impossible to get it back? Like there's nothing you can do."

"What would his response to that be? What is he suggesting that you do, exactly?"

Tell him, 'I would love to get your money back. I don't know how, so you will have to walk me through the process step by step'. Maybe then he will figure out what he is asking is impossible." ~ Alternative-Redditer

"This is the correct answer. The vet bills and the trip are completely unrelated."

"Sadly, the brother went into debt to try to save his dog. Now, he needs to figure out how to pay that debt. There are tough options out there: credit card debt, work an extra job, sell things he owns, borrow from someone (although I wouldn't trust him to pay back a family member at this point), etc..."

"One of the toughest ways to pay that debt would be to try to get a refund on a nonrefundable trip. Definitely NTA." ~ ChicagoDash

While it's unfortunate that the brother's dog died, his family members don't have his money.

The nonrefundable fees they all paid for the vacation are where his money is.

If those businesses won't refund the money, then it's gone.

Money is a significant cause of conflict in relationships.

People often have different money-saving and spending habits.

It really should be addressed head-on.

If one person likes to spend everything they make, will their money-saving partner bail them out?

If the frugal partner bails them out more than once, is the expectation that it will always be their spendthrift partner's fault?

A woman turned to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subReddit for feedback after her partner asked for money one time too many.

Kate_Johnson02 asked:

"AITA for refusing to pay for my boyfriend's dog's vet bills when he's always broke?"

The original poster (OP) explained:

"So, I (23, female) have been with my boyfriend (27, male) for a little over two years. He has a dog, Buster, who I absolutely love, but the thing is… my boyfriend is terrible with money."

"Like, the kind of guy who gets paid and immediately spends half his paycheck on games, random collectibles, eating out, and whatever new hobby he's fixated on that month. Then, by the middle of the month, he's suddenly broke and 'so stressed' about bills."

"Anyway, last week, Buster got really sick and needed urgent vet care, which ended up costing a few hundred dollars. My boyfriend called me, panicking, saying he didn't have enough and asking if I could help."

"And yeah, I could afford it, but honestly, I was so frustrated because this isn't even the first time he's been in a financial crisis over something he should have planned for. I told him I love Buster, but this was his responsibility, and he should have set aside emergency savings instead of constantly blowing money on nonsense."

"That's when he hit me with, 'So you'd just let Buster suffer?' Like… no? But also, why is this suddenly my problem? I suggested he ask his family or, I don't know, maybe not act like I'm an ATM, and he got all huffy and passive aggressive about it."

"Now he's been distant, and some of our mutual friends are saying I was heartless for not helping when I clearly had the money."

"I feel guilty because I do love that dog, and I get that emergencies happen, but at the same time, I'm not his financial safety net, especially when he constantly refuses to be responsible with his own money."

"AITA?"

The OP summed up their situation.

"I refused to pay for my boyfriend's dog's vet bills even though I could afford it because I felt it wasn't my responsibility when he constantly mismanages his money."

"This might make me the a**hole because Buster needed urgent care, and by not helping, I could be seen as prioritizing my frustration with my boyfriend over the dog's well-being."

"Some of our mutual friends think I was being heartless since I had the money, but I feel like it's unfair for me to always bail him out when he refuses to be financially responsible."

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA - You're The A**hole
• NAH - No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).

"You're NTA. He is 27, but acting like a 16-year-old who is newly employed and blowing his paycheck on toys. He needs to learn to budget and save for emergencies."

"You say, 'some of our mutual friends are saying I was heartless for not helping when I clearly had the money'. I bet they're not chipping in."

"He can set up a payment plan with the vet or put it on a credit card." ~ Dittoheadforever

"You need to move on from this guy. Someone so financially irresponsible will make your life a nightmare."

"I was married to someone like this. 'Hey, husband, where did the new motorcycle come from?' Him: 'Yeah, I noticed there was $2,000 in the checking account, so I used it for a down payment on a new Harley.' Me: 'That money was for the mortgage which is due in a week.' Him: 'You'll figure something out, because I'm not giving up my new bike'."

"He kept getting fired from jobs because he was immature and irresponsible, while I never missed a paycheck. But I didn't make enough to cover all our bills."

"Over the years we had more than one house foreclosed on us and cars repossessed because of his crap."

"This is a similar future that you are looking at. Not everyone is a good fit as a partner, and this man is not a good partner unless you want to be his 'Mommy' for the rest of your life." ~ Successful_Voice8542

"NTA, but does this relationship have a future? If he is like that at 27, hard to imagine him changing anytime soon..." ~ Neurismus

"Yeah, at 27 you should know the concept of a budget. I expect that behaviour from an 18-year-old with their first couple of paychecks."

"There's a point you're meant to realise that blowing all your money the first week is irresponsible." ~ The_Death_Flower

"NTA. If you have pets you are responsible for them. We have three cats and put €60 per month aside for yearly vet visits and emergencies. That's what a responsible owner does."

"Your boyfriend shouldn't have a dog at all. He isn't financially mature."

"He could easily sell some of his collectibles and voilà! There's money for the vet bill."

"But he doesn't even think about this because his material things are more important than his dog." ~ UnhappyCryptographer

"NTA. But why the h*ll are you in a relationship with someone who is the opposite of you in those important things?"

"He won't change, he will always rely on you because you help him."

"It's time for an honest talk about values and aims. Don't waste your time, money, and energy." ~ Bastet79

"Exactly. This behavior would be a deal-breaker for me."

"And he would have been weeded out from my long-term dating prospects by the 3rd date because my hard work and self-denial of 'treats' to build up savings is not getting destroyed by some yahoo who thinks he can have his cake (my cake!) and eat it, too."

"If you're willing to put up with a partner with this mindset, who will drag you down with him for the rest of your time together (don't get me started on how you will share his debts if you marry him!), then at the very least, make sure he pays you back for each expense the second he gets his paycheck."

"Or you will just spend the rest of your relationship subsidizing his fun, carefree lifestyle while you deny yourself any joyful purchases in order to play catch-up with your finances every month.  NTA." ~ Lizwings

"Your boyfriend seems to be a person with a lifestyle CAUSING one emergency after the other. A good way to guilt you into paying for him again and again."

"Why don't you break up with Mister Emergency and find someone less tedious?" ~ k23_k23

"NTA. Care credit. You see the 🚩🚩🚩🚩 now, right? Why are you still with this person? And trying to guilt trip you, too?"

"He's 27 and STILL doesn't have his sh*t together. You deserve better. If you are not on the same page having financial responsibilities and being able to budget, it's a relationship and marriage killer."

"It only gets worse. He may need an advisor to learn how to do it properly. But don't you dare become that for him."

"You're too young. Dump him and go travel and enjoy your life. This guy is not the one you're looking for." ~ Leviosapatronis

"NTA, but you need to ask yourself, 'Is this how I want to spend the rest of my life?'. If the answer is no, which it sounds like it is, why are you still there?"

"Takes more than feelings to make a relationship work long term." ~ Mommabroyles

"NTA. I, personally, would likely have paid for the dog's care then dumped the boyfriend, but I'm a sucker for animals. Its his responsibility to have a plan to pay for his pets and to just learn to budget in general."

"If he can't do that, he shouldn't have a pet at minimum. Hopefully, this will be his wake-up call, but it sounds like he'd rather blame you than take responsibility." ~ emptydragonsevrywhr

"So you're NTA, but given you love the dog, this is really not the place where I'd draw the line if this was happening frequently."

"I'd do it with groceries or something. I wouldn't say no and have this conversation for the first time over something this serious." ~ LexChase

"NTA. HE is the one that is letting Buster suffer. He should take responsibility for the commitment he's made by owning a dog." ~ InterviewGlum9263

However one person felt the OP picked the wrong time to make her point, voting everyone sucked here (ESH).

"I'm going with ESH, with him getting 90% and you getting 10%."

"If you've been annoyed with this behavior for a while, the time to pick this fight isn't when his dog is having an emergency.  Because you look like the a**hole if you have loaned him money before and choose not to this time."  

"It looks like you don't care about his dog, not that you are holding a boundary." ~ littleorangemonkeys

The OP later added:

"Hey y'all, I really appreciate all the responses, seriously."

"So about my boyfriend, well he's actually a great guy in a lot of ways. We get along really well, he's kind, we have fun together, and honestly, if it weren't for the money stuff, things would be perfect."

"That's why this is such a tough situation. I know he means well, but his spending habits drive me crazy."

"I don't wanna feel like I'm his mom, always being the responsible one while he just wings it every month. At the same time, I love Buster, and it sucks to see him in the middle of all this."

"I get why some people think I should've just paid and dealt with it later, but I also don't wanna set the expectation that I'll always be the one fixing his money problems."

"It's just a lot to think about. Thanks again for all the input. I really appreciate it!"

Hopefully, Buster is OK.

As for this relationship, it's important to remember that people will treat you the way you let them.

If OP repeatedly allowed the expectation that they're an ATM, their boyfriend won't understand when they don't want to be treated like one when their financial emergency is an actual emergency.