Redditor ThrowRA_wiwk is a 28-year-old woman who had been in the hospital with a concussion after surviving a horseback riding accident.
When she was able to regain full consciousness, she returned home to her 33-year-old girlfriend who was worried about almost losing her.
But the Original Poster (OP) inadvertently made a discovery that made her question their relationship.
She sought the Relationship Advice subReddit to see what strangers on the internet would say about her situation.
The OP wrote:
“My girlfriend had a one night stand while I was unconscious in the hospital.”
“I go horseback riding almost every Wednesday afternoon.”
“Last Wednesday my horse got spooked and I was thrown off.”
“I passed out at the scene and was rushed to the hospital with a concussion, broken leg, and a chest injury from when my horse accidentally kicked me.”
“I was in and out of consciousness for the first two days due to my injuries and my medication. It was not until the third day that I was stable enough to retain consciousness for an extended period of time.”
“When I woke up on the third day, my girlfriend and her family were there. She hugged me and said she didn’t know what she would have done if she had lost me.”
“She was attentive throughout the day and we took pictures and talked about stuff.”
“I finally came home at the start of the weekend, but I’m still physically struggling and felt guilty that I couldn’t do anything with my girlfriend since I was tired easily and was short of breath from just walking. So I called our mutual friends to come over and keep her company.”
“However, yesterday, when my girlfriend thought I was knocked out from my pain meds and went to take a shower her phone kept buzzing next to me.”
“I saw pretty angry texts from a random girl that were saying stuff like ‘You’re the one who lied about having a girlfriend.’ And ‘but thanks for getting my hopes up. And finally ‘have a good life.’”
“I’m crying when my girlfriend comes back and she takes the phone from me. She said I shouldn’t have even looking at her phone and if I didn’t, then this never would have come back to affect me.”
“She admitted that she had slept with someone she had met at a gay bar but that it was because she didn’t know how badly I’ve been hurt and that she was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to give her sex for months.”
“She said she was there the first day and only left my side because I was stabilized. And that she was stressed out by my condition and needed to let off steam.”
“She said it was over and that she’s here with me now.”
“I don’t know what to do. She’s currently paying for most of my in home treatment and was perfectly nice to me- I never would have known she was cheating if I hadn’t found her texts.”
“Should I forgive her? I also worry if my physical condition stagnates. I keep thinking it would be unfair to deny her sex for a long time because she told me at the beginning of our relationship she had a high sex drive and needed it practically every night.”
Redditors pointed out the red flags in the OP’s relationship.
“Getting multiple angry texts from a one night stand isn’t really normal. It makes me wonder if she had been seeing this person for a while and broke it off out of guilt when you got hurt.”
“It’s hard to tell without seeing the actual wording of all of them, but what you posted implies it slightly. I would be very weary of your partner.” – DriftinFool
“You were in the hospital and her first reaction was to go cheat on you. Is that really someone you want to be with?” – IEatMyBaconNude
“Yeah, you were in critical condition and her first thought was ‘how am I gonna get laid now??.’ That one of the sh**tiest excuse for cheating i have ever heard.” – super_funny_nick
“Yeah and not only that, she legit tried to gaslight her by saying that it would not have affected her if she didn’t go through her phone! I’m sorry but this girl sounds like an absolute horrible human being.”
“Cheated, While OP was in the hospital, For only a couple of days (that’s apparently how long she lasted), Lied to the girl about being in a relationship, Gaslit OP when she found out, Biggest red flags I’ve ever seen.” – coremeister69
“Holy sh*t she waited two days to find and f’k a stranger because she was worried she wouldn’t be able to have sex for a few months… Great preview for the future.”
“Next thing you know you trip and fall and she’s on the phone browsing tinder before you hit the ground.” – FrostyPoot
The OP was given permission to take full advantage of the girlfriend’s financial support for as long as necessary.
“You stay with her. You be the loving supportive girlfriend she needs. You forgive her. You apologize that you cant give her what she needs right now. You tell her you will try your hardest to do right by her.”
“UNTIL you dont need her help paying for your treatments anymore.”
“Then you tell her now that you are recovered you feel you both need to find someone more compatible with your life goals.”
“Cheating has a price after all.” – 03throwaway03
“OP shouldn’t waste any more time on her, but since she’s paying the medical bills may as well let her do so until OP is completely healed. People can say what they want, but at this point it’s clear that OPs GF only really cares about her needs.”
“May as well let this run until OP can walk out the door by her own power.” – Red_Jester-94
“I like this. It’s cunningly savage and very appropriate for a cheating d**che bag. OP should definitely go for it.” – nick7070
As far as forgiveness?
“No you shouldn’t forgive her. This is the equivalent to; if you had died she didn’t wait for your body to get cold because all she could think about is her needs.”
“All this is her her her. You could have died and she cheated on you at the first opportunity. It’s been less than a week. So any time you get the slightest injured you just have to expect her to go find another woman? There are a million other ways to let off steam.” – Bread_Biter123
Redditors continued admonishing the girlfriend for her non-apology, and they advised the OP to leave the relationship when it was convenient for her.