All the stress and anguish inherent with planning a wedding is usually all forgotten on the big day.
As the love shared by the happy couple and all those in attendance will likely overshadow any hiccup or drama present.
And when the bride and groom look back on their wedding album, they will likely only reflect in joy at all the happy moments and memories captured in the pictures.
This sadly wasn’t the case for the wife of Redditor Cute_Train_4166, who was furious about a picture of her new husband and his divorced parents.
Even going as far as to scold her new father-in-law, requiring the original poster (OP) to intervene.
Concerned he didn’t stick up enough for his wife, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where he asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for defending my dad and telling my wife that he didn’t ruin our wedding pictures?”
The OP explained how the fact that his divorced parents agreed to make amends for the wedding pictures did not sit well with his wife.
“Personally I find this to be a really silly argument, but here we go.”
“I got married recently, and for family pictures on my side we decided to do just my mom and dad, divorced, as both of their new partners came into my life as an adult, and to be honest I can’t stand either of them.”
“My dad just assumed I wouldn’t want his wife as she isn’t really family to me, and my mom knows full well that I will never take pictures with her boyfriend after the things he has said about me.”
“Neither said a word about this.”
“We got the pictures back recently and my wife is furious because my dad had his hands on my mom’s waist.”
” I really don’t see why that is a bad thing.”
“My wife said it was creating a false narrative that they were together, people were going to think it was weird, and our future kids were going to assume they were married at the time.”
“I said it could be much worse.”
“My mom could have been one of those crazy MILs claiming me.”
“My dad could have had his typical grumpy face.”
“I thought the pictures looked nice.’
“My wife disagreed, but I thought we put it behind us.”
“We had dinner recently with my dad and his wife, and my wife gave him his copy of the pictures.”
“She pointed out his hands and asked him why he took it upon himself to stage the pictures, and why he thought that was an appropriate picture.”
“He said it just seemed like the natural place to put his hands.”
“He told her to calm down which made things worse and she began getting an attitude.”
“I intervened and said that he did not ruin the pictures and to leave him alone.”
“I said it was such a minor thing, and who really cares, but I did tell him to stop laughing as my wife being upset isn’t funny.”
“My wife feels I betrayed her and that I’m not even trying to see things from her point of view.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community agreed that the OP did absolutely the right thing in sticking up for his father, and was not the a**hole for doing so.
Everyone agreed that the OP’s wife was being incredibly unreasonable, and that it was very nice of the OP’s parents to put their differences aside for the wedding pictures.
“Your wife severely overestimates how interested your future kids are going to be in the wedding photos.”
“Besides, what did she want instead?”
“For them to be screaming at each other or looking like they wished the other person was on the other side of the world, so there’d be no question to any outside observer they weren’t together?”
“And what exactly does she want done about it now?”
“If she doesn’t drop it, let alone stop throwing around ridiculous overreactions like ‘betrayal’ (seriously, why do so many stories on this site involve people going there over the pettiest sh*t imaginable?) I don’t hold out much hope this marriage will last long enough for anyone to care about the photos.”- mm172
“NTA your wife sounds unhinged.”
“The only people who should care are your parents current partners.”
“If she truly hates it, she can have his hand photoshopped off her waist.”- pudge-thefish
“Dude, she does know your parents were married before and had you, right?”
“Like, they did used to be a thing.”
“Who the hell is going to go through her wedding pictures and nitpick at something like a pose for the parents of one side of the family?”
“It’s just a good thing that your parents are capable of being able to act nicely together at a wedding.”
“What does she want?”
“Drama and cake throwing?”- DNRmyDNA
“NTA but your wife sure is.”
“I hope she’s not usually like this or you’re not going to have a happy marriage.”-VoyagerVII
“Sorry man, I know she’s your wife, but she sounds like she needs to gain perspective.”
“First off, who is she to dictate the terms of your parents’ comfort and relationship with each other?”
“The way I see it, if your mom was ok with your dad putting his hand around her waist, and he was ok doing so, it’s none of your wife’s business.”
“Secondly, your parents sound like lovely people, and I base that off the consideration they both showed respecting your decisions with regards to their current partners.”
“That, and the fact that they made sure the photos were a pleasant experience and a nice memory rather than making a fuss about them and refusing to participate or something.”
“Wife sounds like she needs to work through some sh*t.”
“Not sure I believe her reaction to be appropriate or proportionate at all.”
“She has no locus stand here.”- Stroopwafeled
“Your wife is.”
“Maybe she should just think of the photo as your parents showing that they are still united in their love for their kid.”
“It crazy to make that big of a deal out of it.”
“The moment has passed and the photo can’t be changed so why did she even need to bring it up to your parents.”- what_a_f*cker69
“Good grief, your wife is ridiculous and I don’t blame your father for laughing at her because her ‘complaint’ about the picture was laughable.”- penguin_squeak
“How dare your parents get along and not cause drama at your wedding.”
“It’s almost like they care for you and wanted it to be about you.”- Future-Jury8212
“I think she is totally overreacting.”
“Sounds like there really could’ve been some real awful drama around pictures and they all made it perfect.”
“She needs to grow up.”- Chanmillerusa
“You love your dad, your dad loves you.”
“Both of your parents made big efforts to make accommodations for your feelings for the wedding.”
“What’s not to be happy with here?”
“Your wife needs to learn to be happy when everything goes well and people are genuinely happy for you.”- Snoo-74562
“This is ridiculous on her part.”
“She should be happy that they were civil at the wedding and didn’t cause any problems.”
“Regarding any future children I’m sure they won’t care or notice.”- stargazer-02
“Did your wife want them to awkwardly stand next to each other?”
“‘Creating a false narrative’ and accusing your father of ‘staging’ the pictures is way too much.”-AstroSunflower
“I think your parents behaved impeccably and clearly tried to make their body language as loving and caring as they could for their sons pictures.”
“You can’t get some exes in the same pictures so the fact they were so incredibly willing to put their differences aside, for your day, was incredibly kind of them.”
‘Your wife should be able to see this.”
“With some people nothing will ever be good enough.”- Aggressive_Fly236
“Putting your hand on someone’s waist for pictures is normal for pictures.”
“Like even family members will sometimes take pictures like that.”
“It’s really not a big deal.”- Striking_Ad_6573
“Your wife is being absolutely, utterly ridiculous.”
“It’s extremely weird she cares this much about your parents posing in a very normal way even for divorced people.”
“As in her actually being angry about something so stupid is legitimately concerning.”-Worth_Raspberry_11
It is rather unsettling that the OP’s wife would be upset about people looking happy in photographs, even her husband’s divorced parents.
Rather than view it as misleading, she might see it as an opportunity to teach their future children how it’s possible to put their differences aside.
Here’s hoping behavior like this doesn’t become a common occurrence in their marriage.