As you may or may not already know, being a restaurant server is a tough job.
Servers already have enough stress just doing their jobs, so it’s unfortunate when some customers get out of hand about things that have nothing to do with food or service.
Certain scenarios can lead to sticky issues with management.
Our recently deleted Redditor waitress is trying to figure out her own predicament.
So naturally she came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit pleading for advice.
“AITA for showing the tip slip to the girlfriend?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“I work at Hooters and we have frequent problems with men giving us their phone numbers. I was working quite a busy night, and this guy and his girlfriend came in.”
“I was completely professional and focused more of my attention on the girl, as I knew they were a couple. The guy was continuously flirting with me, and the girlfriend was not happy.”
“She kept shooting him dirty looks every time I came to the table. He had me run around the entire night and grab things for them, just so he could see me again.”
“By the time they were ready to leave, I gave them the bill and the tip slip. He gave me a 5% tip, and wrote down his phone number.”
“Not only is he in a relationship, but he didn’t let his girlfriend see it. I looked at it, and then handed it to his girlfriend, asking her if the amount was ok.”
“His face turned white. Her face turned red as she screamed in his face that they were over. Apparently, this wasn’t the first time he did this.”
“She slammed her hands on the table and stormed out. He started screaming at me, calling me names, and saying it could’ve been ‘our little secret.'”
“People in the restaurant were staring. His threats and name calling lasted about 5 minutes before he finally left.”
“My coworkers are saying I’m in the right, but my manager told me that I caused a racket in the restaurant and should’ve just ignored it.”
“He threatened to write me up if I did something like that again, because now we lost a potential regular.”
Redditors had no issue sharing their thoughts on this matter by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors felt our OP was NOT the a**hole. So let’s take a deep dive into their thoughts.
“NTA and I would go to H[uman] R[esources[ because your manager didn’t protect you against someone who verbally assaulted you.” ~ trowawaywork
“Unfortunately, most restaurants like this don’t have an ‘HR’ and can pretty much do whatever they want.” ~ stee_stee_
“Hooters is a massive chain restaurant and does have a Human Resources department.”
“You should contact them, but be careful of reprisals because a manager who would not protect you from an abusive customer seems like the type to seek revenge for being called on it.” ~ Disastrous-Egg-3160
“Depending on where you’re from, that actually gives them more legal responsibility to protect their staff from sexual harassment.”
“Also depending on where you’re from, giving someone who is at their place of work your number and then yelling at them when they reject you is legally sexual harassment.”
“I happen to live somewhere that both of these are true and we still have Hooters here. I just hope OP also lives somewhere like where I do.” ~ SnakesInYerPants
“Their whole deal is profiting off the fact that most men will overspend in the presence of attractive women, not putting up with verbal abuse or harassment.”
“Not defending Hooters or their business model, but they’re a lot better about this than you might think. Strip clubs are too, for the same reason.”
“One customer isn’t worth NEARLY as much to them as an attractive, energetic, charismatic server. THAT is the product people go to Hooters for typically: the service from those servers, not the food.”
“A single Hooters customer isn’t worth anywhere near to Hooters what a good server is worth, even in a single day.” ~ juliuspepperwoodchi
The customer is not always right. That’s a myth.
“NTA. I personally disagree with the concept ‘not my business, not my problem.'”
“You tried to focus on the girlfriend while serving, he was continuously flirting with you and having you run back and forth, the girlfriend was clearly uncomfortable.”
“If was the girlfriend I would want know if my boyfriend did something that blatantly disrespectful in front of me, even if it resulted in a fight or breakup.”
“You did what you thought was right.” ~ novanetvxzgfea
“Judging by the anti-work sub and the various articles I’ve seen, OP may be better off just looking around for another job.”
“The industry seems to be short on workers at the moment.” ~ codeverity
“I wanna know his thought process of a 5% tip being enough to entice her to call him.”
“Like, wtf?! First he’s a creep right in front of his G[irl] F[riend] , and he has the audacity to think a 5% tip is enough to warrant a call?”
“We’re all in agreement that he’s a creep, OP is NTA, and that her manager is a jerk for not protecting her, I’m curious about how Mr. Creep’s mind is working, because ain’t no one calling any numbers on less than 40%.” ~ Witchywomun
“NTA – of course your manager wants the guy’s money without consideration for actual humanity. his judgment in this matter is meaningless.”
“You did the right thing by exposing somebody who SHOULD be broken up with (and no you did not break them up, this man’s actions broke them up).” ~ ijacksonvdsrfwq
“Op is NTA.”
Beware HR. They have their own alliances.
“But the HR thing, don’t even bother. HR is there to protect the company, not the employees.”
“HR could see op’s actions as a risk to the company and meddling in clients’ personal affairs.”
“Yes the customer was a douche, yes his gf deserves better, but from the corporate side – which Hooters being a huge chain – ops actions can be seen as reckless.”
“Always gotta be careful when approaching HR about anything and look at it from both angles.”
“Remember, HR is the company, and the company is not your friend.” ~ kryo2019
“NTA. A ‘regular’ who tips 5% and demands extra attention is costing you money not making you money and is a customer everyone is better off without.”
“Including the business because if you’re spending time on crappy, demanding customers you’re paying less attention to other tables who will then be less satisfied.” ~ MuchPreferPets
What is our first most important lesson when dining out? Be kind to your servers. Their jobs are already arduous enough.
Also, maybe figure out relationship issues before you go out to dine.
And if you’re going to flirt with a stranger… first learn how to flirt with a stranger. When you’re single.
Lastly… 20% is the new 15. 20 and over!
Thank for coming to my Ted Talk.