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Guy Asks If He’s Wrong For Refusing To Pay For Boy’s Leg Surgery After Traffic Accident He Didn’t Cause

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Accidents sometimes cannot be avoided. They tend to be especially serious when a motorcycle or child is involved.

One Redditor partyontheclouds found themselves in a sad situation which included both.

They turned to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for feedback on their role and culpability.

They asked:

“AITA for refusing to pay for a child’s surgical procedure?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained what happened:

“I (M 33), was involved in a road traffic accident, which resulted in injury to a child (M 6) 5 years ago. I was an avid motorcycle enthusiast, and I go for cross country road trips often.”

”During one of these trips, a child ran across the expressway and I lost control and collided with the child, mainly injuring the child’s legs.”

“The parents were just pulled up ahead and were smoking weed. They hadn’t even noticed that the child had got out of the car. They then sued me and lost.”

”Long story short, because I was going under the speed limit and was not inebriated, I was let off with warnings and, I just had to pay for the court processing fees for the parents.”

“Anyway, the child suffered a fractured leg, and had to have surgery. I was deeply shaken by this event, and feel extremely guilty.”

”So I volunteered to pay the cost of the surgery which came up to 34k USD.”

“Over the past few years, I developed PTSD and depression, started therapy and I am on antidepressants. Though I am way better than before, I still need therapy once in a few weeks, and do have the occasional nightmare.”

“Presently, the child (M 12) developed something called contractures and myositis ossificans (?) from the surgery and has a difficult time walking.”

“Now the child requires another surgical procedure. So the parents, contacted me repeatedly and are breathing down my throat demanding more money for the surgery.”

”I downright refused. I asked my partner and friends, and some of them have said that I am TA.”

“I am deeply conflicted and would like some feedback regarding this issue. AITA?”

OP added some more information in a comment saying: 

“Hey, I would like to thank you all for the responses. I am so relieved that a huge number of you think that I’m not TA.”

“So to, answer a few, if not all of your questions.”

“1. My insurance did not cover for the initial surgery, as I was deemed not guilty by the court.”

“2. There were quite a few suits filed against me. I paid the court fee for a few of them, and like someone rightly pointed out, I won the criminal suits and civil suits only in the matters of the final verdict.”

“I was ordered by the judge in a few of the suits , to pay the court fee for myself as well as the opposition.”

“3. I know I needn’t have had to pay for the surgery. I felt it was the right thing to do, and I also did it for my mental health.”

“4. CPS was involved, and action was taken, but I did not follow up on that, as I just wanted to distance myself from all the parties involved in the accident.”

Redditors weighed in by ruling:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

The subReddit agreed OP was NTA in this situation.

NTA. The accident wasn’t your fault. The negligent parents are entirely to blame for what happened to their child.”

“They should be grateful you paid the cost of the surgery because most people wouldn’t do that. The parents caused their child physical pain and you emotional pain.”

“You did nothing wrong.”

”Block the parents on your phone and/or social medial, however they’re contacting you, and drop anyone from your life who tells you you’re an a**hole for not spending even more money just because you happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.”~cara180455

No man You are NTA and you did more then you should. I can’t imagine what you are going through having that guilt even though you aren’t really guilty but parents are and I’m not a stranger to mental issues.”

”Just the fact that accident ruined you emotionally and mentally this much says you are good person with empathy but don’t let anyone treat you like an idiot for that”~LanaDark

NTA. Everything that happened was never your fault. That kid ran into the road because their parents were too baked to notice.”

“You paid for the kids surgery even after the parents tried to sue you! You have gone above and beyond there is nothing to feel guilty about at all.”~cringekid1515

Holy h*ll NTA you have gone above and beyond what is morally right to help that child I’m surprised the parents weren’t revoked custody for the negligence. But that’s something else.”

“You are traumatized and in pain and I feel for you. Don’t give them extra money it won’t stop here then you’ll be paying for physiotherapy and the massages and chiropractor etc… etc…”

That accident was not your fault and I’m sorry you lost something that you loved to do. I wish you the best”~witcheshour130

“The only a**holes here are the parents, and a medical system that would let a little boy suffer because their parents don’t have money. NTA”~Tidus790

Hopefully the OP can find peace of mind from the responses they received.

Written by Heidi Dockery

Heidi Dockery is a Maine artist & nature enthusiast with an affinity for libraries. She studies Criminal Justice with a special focus on psychology & sociology at the University of Maine. When not studying, painting, or re-reading the works of Terry Pratchett, she volunteers & enjoys various activities most would label nerdy.