in ,

Couple At Odds After Husband Refuses To Let Wife Store Her Milano Cookies In The Fridge

Leon Seibert/Unsplash

We all have our own little quirks when it comes to food.

Some little touches or changes which we think makes certain foods extra delicious.

Though these embellishment might not seem quite so delicious in the eyes of others.

Redditor frozenMilanos faced this problem when her husband lost patience regarding a very specific way she enjoyed one of her favorite snacks.

But when this disagreement slowly led to some unwanted strain within their marriage, the original poster (OP) took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:

“AITA for Refrigerating my Milanos?”

The OP shared that she has a weakness for a specific type of cookie, and she likes to eat them in a very specific way.

“To say I (29 F[emale]) love Milanos would be an understatement.”

“They are my absolute favorite, my comfort food.”

“After years of eating them, I eventually discovered that I liked them best refrigerated.”

“Being able to bite into them just makes them taste better to me, it’s a texture thing.”

“Kind of weird, I suppose, but it’s just how I like them.”

Her husband, however, did not share her belief that Milano cookies are best served chilled, and even made extra effort to ensure she didn’t store them in the refrigerator.

“It’s not, however, how my husband (31 M[ale]) likes them.”

“He always tells me that I shouldn’t refrigerate them; that they’re cookies, they’re not meant to be refrigerated.”

“Every day, I find that he’s taken them out of the refrigerator.”

“This is annoying, because again, these are my favorite snack.”

“I will eat them almost every day, whereas he will only eat them on occasion.”

“I have tried buying him his own separate Milanos, but that doesn’t stop him from taking mine out of the fridge.”

“He just doesn’t want to see him there, and nothing I say to him seems to convince him otherwise.”

“We’ve been fighting on and off about this for a while, and it came to a head recently.”

“He’s telling me to just stop it and I don’t know what to do at this point.”

“AITA for continuing to put them in the refrigerator?”

Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
  • NAH – No A**holes Here

The OP found ample support from the Reddit community in wanting to chill her Milanos, firmly deciding she was not at all the a**hole.

Just about everyone agreed that the OP had every right to want to store her cookies in the fridge, and found the fact that her husband was so bothered by this to be a major red flag.


“You’re entitled to your preferences and he’s entitled to his.”

“The problem is that he doesn’t think you’re entitled to your preferences.”

“That’s the real problem.”- TamaraYC.

“Remember that time your husband was an asshole over cookies?”

“Pepperidge Farm remembers.”



“The fact that even when you get separate bags of cookies, he still insists on taking yours out, means that he is being a weirdo control freak about this.”

“Does he start power struggles about a lot of other things?”- crockofpot.


“Why does it bother your husband so much how you choose to eat your cookies?!”

“It’s really unnecessarily controlling.”

“Is he controlling in other ways?”-iownakeytar.


“If he can even have his own bag and it’s still a problem then you need to have a serious conversation about how this controlling behavior is not cute at all.”

“Or something that you should put up with.”

“It may seem like a silly thing but maybe that’s why it IS a big deal.”

“He’s purposefully doing something to take away a snack that brings his partner joy every day.”

“A snack that he doesn’t have to put effort in and one he rarely eats.”

“Hell, I have a snack like that and my partner makes sure it’s always in the house stored exactly how I like it just because he knows it makes me happy, so maybe you can tell him he needs to step up and stop being against you.”

“It’s a small joy for you, and he’s literally purposefully taking it away and calling you dumb for liking it.”

“That’s not someone who’s on your team and advocates for you, it’s someone who belittles you and tries to control every little thing instead of it being a collaboration.”-hif1995.

“You bought him his own cookies.”

“He can do with his cookies as he likes.”

“Why doesn’t he respect you enough to leave your food alone?”-Impossible-Pause3788.


“Your husband is being absolutely ridiculous.”

“What is really going on here?”-cardshark6.

NTA your husband is being weirdly controlling about cookies. You bought him his own and he can do what he likes with his.

“NTA, but I’m getting the feeling this has nothing to do with cookies.”

“Your husband probably wants a sense of control, which is why he’s dying on this refrigerated cookie hill.”

“Be careful, and maybe it’s worth opening a conversation about?”- decafoatmilklatte


“This is a really weird flex and hill to die on your husband’s part.”

“Leave the damn cookies alone, you even bought him his own bag.”- Pan-of-the-Wilds.

“NTA – but your husband is!”

“How does it hurt him to leave them in the fridge??”

“Every single time he takes them out he’s saying he cares more abut being ‘right’ than respecting your preferences/simple request…”

“Who cares where cookies ‘belong’?”

“You like them in the fridge, there’s no reason he can’t leave them in fridge…”-beeeeeebee.

“NTA what a weird, controlling hill for your husband to die on.”- idreaminwords.

“NTA what a weird thing to insist he’s correct about and enforce it in your life?”- sadclowncunt.


“They’re your cookies.”

“You can do what you want with them.”

“There are no cookie police to stop you.”

“There’s no ‘do not refrigerate’ warning on the side, but your husband definitely needs a red flag painted on his.”

“Controlling nutzo he is.”-elpatio6.


“The fact that he’s pulling your cookies out of the fridge pushes it over the line from no a**holes.”

“Unless you have a tiny fridge and someone getting in has to play Tetris to get something out, there’s no need to move some stupid cookies.”

“Him having his own cookies is a good compromise.”- rmric0.


“For the love.”

“I’m curious why is this such a big deal to him? “

“My spouse and I once learned that in an argument, ;the issue is not the issue’.”

“What’s the real issue behind his hang up about this, ’cause this is deeper than just a cold cookie?

“Maybe in a calm moment you two can sit down and chat about it.”

“Good luck, OP.”- UbiquitousRiffing.


“Take a look at your relationship though.”

“What other things in your life does your husband insist on controlling and spoiling for you?”

“It may be time to think critically and observe, take notes at the end of each day.”

“This cookie control issue is not a normal thing for him to be doing. It’s likely that he does this in many other tiny ways.”

“Chipping away at you gradually.”

“Examine his daily behavior.”-vulpesvulpesfugit.


“You putting the cookies in the fridge doesn’t affect him in any way.”

“Why is he so hung up on it?”- mothertothemax.

“NTA but he sure is.”

“My boyfriend loves Reese’s in the fridge.”

“I don’t eat them but if I did I’d prefer room temp.”

“But doesn’t matter, they are his snack and I make space for them in the fridge.”

“It makes no sense why your husband is bothered by cookies in the fridge when he has the same cookies unrefrigerated to himself.”

“At the end of the day it’s a respect thing.”

“Your husband should be able to respect that you like your snacks a little colder, and this doesn’t hurt anyone.”

“It makes no sense to deny you this pleasantry.”

“Take the toddler approach and have him explain his stance, asking ‘why’ at every turn.”

“Maybe the fridge looks messy with the cookie bag inside?”

“Could you put them in Tupperware so they aren’t as noticeable?”- Theliontthatwitch.

The OP even received encouragement to stand her ground, and not let her husband pressure her to stop, even offering her tips on how to do this.


“If this were me… both of my entire refrigerators would be totally jammed full of Milano cookie bags by now.”

“I’d just keep buying more and stuffing them in the fridge until he got the hint to stop removing them.”

“Oh NTA btw.”- AbbyBirb.


“This is exactly the kind of weird fight I love to stumble across in this sub.”

“Something that doesn’t matter really at all, but has turned into a sticking point in a marriage.”

“Keep those cookies cool, kid.”- EntireBroccoli9631.


“Why is he being such a control freak?”

“Maybe put them in tupperware dish so he doesn’t notice them.”- pixp85.


“I mean why on earth does it offend him so much if he has his own bag outside the fridge.”

“Lol! This is one of those things where I’d escalate it by taking his beer or something that he would only typically have cold and continually moving it out of the fridge until he stops touching your Milanos.”

“Stand your ground!”-Mo-Makes.

Others revealed that they shared the OP’s love of eating Milanos chilled.


“I actually freeze my Milanos – love them like that!”

“Meanwhile, your husband is being completely ridiculous”

“Why does he even care?”- pbc85.

One hopes that this is just a pet peeve of the OP’s husband, and there isn’t a bigger underlying issue.

Either way, here’s hoping that this situation will be rectified sooner rather than later, and the OP will be able to enjoy all the nice, cold Milano cookies she wants.

Written by John Curtis

A novelist, picture book writer and native New Yorker, John is a graduate of Syracuse University and the children's media graduate program at Centennial College. When not staring at his computer monitor, you'll most likely find John sipping tea watching British comedies, or in the kitchen, taking a stab at the technical challenge on the most recent episode of 'The Great British Baking Show'.