We always want to be welcoming and accommodating to friends and family.
Even when they show up to our homes unannounced.
If if would have been helpful, not to mention polite, for them to have called ahead, turning them away would be rude, and find ourselves being the best host we can.
That being said, it’s only fair for our unexpected and uninvited guests to level their expectations in regards to any services provided.
Redditor bakkedgoodz was pleasantly surprised to be paid a visit by his sister, brother-in-law, and niece.
Things quickly turned sour, however, when the original poster (OP)’s niece smelled something the OP was working on in the kitchen.
Something his niece was not permitted to eat, much to the anger of his sister.
Wondering if he had done anything wrong, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where he asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for having pot cookies out in the open in my own home?”
The OP explained how his sister scolded him for preparing something which was dangerous for her daughter to eat, despite the fact that he had no idea they were coming.
“This is an ongoing situation, and am currently writing this as my niece is having a full-on meltdown. so I apologize for any mistakes.”
“Today was my day off and I decided to whip up a batch of pot cookies, cookies that have weed extract in them, so i can snack on them for the weekend.”
“After they finish baking I left them out on a cooling tray so they can set.”
“Just as i finished cleaning up the kitchen I hear the door bell and went to answer, and surprise surprise it’s my sister with eight-year-old niece and husband.”
“It’s been awhile since I’ve last seen them to it was a happy surprise.”
“I let them in, and the smell of cookies still in the air, and niece goes bolting towards the kitchen.”
“I instantly go chasing her and as I round the corner into the kitchen, niece had just grabbed a cookie and was about to eat it.”
“Quick on my feet I swooped in and grabbed the cookie out of her hand saying that these were adult cookies.”
“Which caused niece to start freaking out.”
“My sister followed in and I explained to her that these cookies had pot in them and assured her I was able to take the cookie away from niece before she had ate any.”
“She instantly blows up at me saying I shouldn’t have pot cookies out when there are kids in the house.”
“I explained how I had just finished baking them and they were setting.”
“And the fact that I didn’t expect ANY children to be around.”
“I am a single man, no kids.”
“She asked if I had any thing that wasn’t ‘laced’ and unfortunately I didn’t.”
“By this point niece has locked herself in the bathroom and is crying.”
“My sister gave me a big ol’ lecture about having drugs in reach of kids, while i stand on the premise of, there wouldn’t be an issue if i had even known they were planning on dropping by today.”
“She called me a huge irresponsible a**hole, and I responded ‘well maybe if you taught your daughter to not just grab shit, we wouldn’t be in this mess!'”
“She left to try to get niece out of the bathroom and I’m sitting here typing this.”
“Am i really the a**hole here?”
“Like i can understand not having drugs out in the open with kids around, and I never would.”
“If i had known there were going to be kids around.”
“Also, before I get any flak, I’m in Canada and weeds legal here.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for baking pot cookies when he had no idea his niece was visiting.
Everyone agreed the OP did nothing wrong, and his sister was being extremely unreasonable for chastising him, particularly after paying a visit unannounced, with other’s pointing out how the OP’s niece should have asked before helping herself to a cookie.
“NTA.”
“You could not have known that she would be bringing her kid by.”
“The kid should not have been grabbing things off your counter without permission.”
“Poor parent deflecting.”
“And this is exactly why you should not swing by someone’s home unannounced.”- mew4ever23
“NTA.”
“As a parent, I can with confidence say you did NOTHING.”
“Wrong here.”- GlorySB*tch
“NTA.”
“You wouldn’t have had them out if she had the courtesy to call first, or the manners to teach her child to ask before taking food from another person’s home.”- BoundaryStompingMIL
“NTA.”
“With all the mediums to connect with people why would you ever pop over unannounced?”
“What if you hadn’t been home?”
“What if you’d been in the middle of ‘something’?”
“Would you then have to be talked down about having ‘adult fun’ in your own house when you didn’t expect anyone to come over?”
“Man she should be so lucky it was just pot cookies.”- Vrey
“NTA.”
“Why on earth should you permanently keep your home in a perfectly kid-friendly state in case her kid drops by?”
“Also, throwing a tantrum because you were denied a snack is toddler level.”
“Not 8-year-old behavior, I have an 8 year old daughter and she’s no saint but what you’re describing is pretty far from the norm.”- icanttho
“NTA.”
“I have an 8 and 4 year old in my home and sometimes I make cookies, and you better believe they still ask in their own damn home if they can have a cookie.”
“What if cookies are for after dinner?”
“What if cookies are for a birthday party?”
“Its rude to take food that’s not yours.”
“In fact, when bringing in an entire tray of cookies to a classroom of 8 year olds they sat down and waited.”
“I don’t know any kids that are just allowed to eat all the cookies whenever the hell they want without asking.”- KhajiitNeedSkooma
“NTA.”
“It’s polite to give people a heads up before you drop by.”
“By 8 years old you should know not to take things without asking.”
“And locking herself in a bathroom over not getting a cookie is ridiculous behavior for an 8yo.”-SapientSlut
“NTA.”
“You were not expecting a child in the house.”
“If you were, it would be a different story.”
“But an adult is allowed to have pot cookies.”
“And they can be in the open when only adults live there and everyone knows they aren’t normal cookies.”
“Also, does you niece not have any manners?”
“She just walked into your house and grabbed a cookie without asking?”
“She’s gotta learn you’ve gotta ask first anyway.”- lunarlandscapes
“I’m a parent, I use weed both medicinally and recreationally, you are, laughably, NTA.”
“Your sister needs to teach her daughter to ask before grabbing things, and realize that she likely would have taken exactly one bite and spit it out.”
“Pot is a really hard flavor to cover, and kids don’t tend to enjoy it.”
“And that her daughter is probably more upset at the sudden reaction by the adults than the lack of a cookie, and will be fine in about five minutes.”
“Also, ‘laced’?”
“Is she serious?”-WhiteMiceBableFish
“NTA.”
“Just…no.”
“They dropped in unannounced, then chastised YOU for having these when ‘cHiLdReN aRe ArOuNd’.”
“No.”
“You’re an adult without kids and do not have to childproof your own home.”
“You did nothing wrong.”- BabyBlueDixie
“I was really really prepared to call you the a**hole.”
“But she tossed a kid into the house without checking that everything was okay for there to be a kid or getting you advanced notice at all.”
“NTA.”
“As strange as that is for me to say in this case.”
“Sounds like your sister is mad that she did some bad parenting and taking it out on you.”-ElectionAssistance
“NTA.”
“It’s your own home and no offense, does the kid not have manners?”
“You don’t just walk into someone home and eat their stuff without permission.”- xoxoforeverblessed
“NTA.”
“She bought kids over unannounced and expected you to just be randomly waiting with cookies for her kids?”- DumbDaisyxo
“NTA.”
‘I’m not saying its the kids fault either.”
“BUT, You shouldn’t just go straight to the kitchen and start eating from there if you are a visitor.”
“Thats kinda rude.”
“And it is your place.”
“You can do whatever you want.”
“Your sister should have let you know she was coming by OR stopped your niece before she went running after the cookies.”- Unearthed_Soul
If someone welcomes you into their house when you show up unannounced, they are being polite.
As you are the ones who all but disrupted their day.
Hopefully, the OP’s sister might learn after this experience to always call ahead of time should she want to pay her brother, or anyone else, a visit.
And maybe be less judgmental of other people’s lifestyles.