in ,

Nurse Kicks Stepdad Out For Implying She’s Not Attractive Enough To Date A Doctor

Ospan Ali/Unsplash

Getting along with a step-parent is frequently no easy task.

But for one woman on Reddit, things took a particularly dramatic turn when her stepfather insulted her appearance, telling her she isn’t attractive enough to date a doctor.

The woman, who goes by the username Ok_Recording_7311 on the site, wasn’t sure about how she’d handled the incident.

So she went to the AITA (Am I The A**hole) subReddit for perspective.

The Original Poster (OP) asked:

“AITA for kicking my stepdad out of my house after he implied that I’m not attractive?”

She explained:

“My mom is currently married to the guy she cheated on my dad with. I don’t have a strong opinion about that because my dad was emotionally abusive and I’m 99% sure cheating on her as well.”

“My mom is a doctor as if her current husband. She also had a couple affairs before him and from her description of the hospital, everyone was fu*king everyone.”

“I decided early on that I would never marry a doctor. The cheating and the egos are out of control. Getting my fist job as a nurse only solidified that opinion.”

“I think that my mom low key hates that I’m a nurse. She wanted me to be a doctor like her and hints that I should date a doctor.”

“We recently had a family dinner and my mom was “joking” and asking if any of the residents or doctors like me. I told her that she knows my rule.”

“I would never date a doctor because most of them are ego-maniacs and from what I’ve seen, they are all cheaters.”

“My mom got defensive about how my dad treated her like sh*t and don’t label her a cheater.”

“I said it isn’t just her, but so many of them cheat I’d never date one.”

“My stepdad loudly announced that it is a non issue because he doubts any of the doctors are desperate to date me or cheat on their wives with me.”

“I was shocked that he would say something that sexist and gross. To be clear, I’d say that I am average. My mom is legit gorgeous, like turns heads, but I look more like my dad.”

“I told him to get out of my house. My mom immediately started defending him, but I was serious and he did leave.”

“I said he isn’t welcome back because he insulted my looks and that is so low for a man to go there. He claims he was defending my mom and I was being needlessly judgey.”

People on Reddit were then asked to judge who was in the wrong in this situation based on the following categories:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
  • NAH – No A**holes Here

And as you might guess, most were not only firmly on OP’s side but were just as appalled by her stepfather’s comments as she was.

“NTA. I guess he proved you right about doctors being ego-maniacs” –Justvibeaway

“That’s exactly what I thought too. I wish OP had the chance to sneak in there ‘you literally prove my point’ before kicking his pathetic butt out the door.”

“Also, what kind of mom hears her partner talk to her child that way and then not defend the child??” –anchovie_macncheese

“Def NTA and you are most likely right. my uncle is pretty homophobic – not in your standard I hate gays kind of thing but just in the fact that he is a bit too obsessed with gender roles.”

“bc of this, I constantly go out of my way to be feminine around him. its petty af, but based on our interactions, I am sure I help to confirm all this stereotypes.” –FakeOrcaRape

“My ex husband had a cousin that was a doctor and omg I hated the guy. He was snotty and the golden child of the whole family because he was a doctor.”

“The family wouldn’t even take a second glance at my ex until we started dating because I’m in the medical field myself.”

“But what sealed the deal for me is when GC and his wife had their first child, literally not even a year old and they were getting on her for not using her silverware properly.”

“I told them she’s a freaking child and then handed her a finger food. They got so mad at me for that.” –sekenraw12

“But are not going to talk about how they both sexualized each other. Like ewwww I wouldn’t want my step dad thinking I was pretty out something. I wouldn’t be offended at all on this topic. Like why is she so offended?!” –Shawndy58

“NTA, I’d have probably done the same. Your mom is a grown woman and can defend herself, but I’m confused as to how saying you’re not attractive is defending her in the first place. What a loser.” –amberissmiling

“What are the chances OP also resembles their mom a bit but most people who’ve seen her dad notices that resemblance more?”

“Some say I look like my dad but most say I’m my mom’s spitting image. Neither of them look alike.”

“Anyway, wouldn’t insulting how a kid looks also kinda insult how the parent/s look?” –danteslacie

“NTA. You answered your moms questions honestly, getting defensive was her responsibility. You have a good job you’re proud of and prefer, her judgement was wholly unnecessary.”

“This man choosing to insult your looks as a response to his wife’s choice of topics not playing out well didn’t do anything to defend his wife, it simply changed the subject to his unacceptable behavior.”

“It makes sense that he’d blame you for his choices, your mother was doing the same a moment before by blaming your father for hers.”

“Glad you demonstrated clear boundaries with him and your mom! Maybe now they’ll both make better choices around you in the future.” –3tzamani

“ESH, Everybody Sucks Here. No problem asking him to leave your house, all of you needed to quit interacting at that point.”

“His comment was rude and unnecessary, but it’s almost as likely to have been about your personality instead of your looks.”

“And you clearly are very ‘judgey’ about doctors and cheaters, so considering that you knew you were in the company of 2 people who fit both categories it was pretty tacky to be voicing those opinions to them when they were your invited guests.”

“There are lot of of obnoxious stereotypes about nurses too, get off your high horse already.” –RB1327

“Not going to lie the Greys Anatomy world really does exist in the medical world. My sister is a surgeon (and has worked at multiple health systems), in all of them you will be surprised at how many of them cheat.”

“Like my sister as a doctor herself refuses to be with anyone in the medical field because of it.” –MaterialCellist4133

“Yep. Daughter called mom a slut; step-dad called daughter ugly; mom rationalized immoral behavior.”

“Sounds almost like a normal family!” –foospork

“You have a point that perhaps he shouldnt have called them out like that but what she said was factual about them.”

“I still think NTA in this particular case–although you’re right her stereotypes about doctors is very strange and borderline cartoonish.”

“People fu*king at work and highly paid/ranking professionals having egos is hardly exclusive to doctors. That’s been the case in every job I’ve ever had from blue collar to high end professional management” –chiefteef8

“ESH. Generalizing to an entire group of people based on your perception of a small sample is a**hole behavior, especially when the people you associate with are in that group.”

“You insulted their profession and called them garbage people.”

“Hitting back by insulting you is also a**hole behavior. You were justified in kicking him out, but you directly provoked ugly behavior with your own.” –Biokabe

“NTA – they sound like major douche bags. The fact that your mom took his side is sad. You should probably distance yourself from them.” –tipareth1978

“…To be fair, you seem to know how your mom feels about your life choices and the cheating rife in her profession, so you could’ve just diffused the whole situation by giving a non-response to her high school-level question about doctors ‘liking’ you.”

“Jesus. But you engaged. You should’ve kicked them both out, OP. Your Mom was just as insulting as your stepdad.”

“Tell them to enjoy their lame doctor lives and stop insulting yours. Guess you at least know who loves drama now. (Answer: both of them.) This is super sad.” –unled_horse

“NTA. I mean the incident had already begun when your mother was taking another stand to demean the job you chose and trying to, once again, convince you that you need to be in a relationship with someone she considers valuable.”

“Your mother is already the a**hole because she’s a bad parent, so her doubling down by really being a bad parent by siding with her terrible spouse seems par for the course.”

“It sounds like you need a distance from your mother since she doesn’t want to have a respectful relationship with you” –JCBashBash

Hopefully OP’s stepfather can learn to be a bit more respectful in the future.

Written by Peter Karleby

Peter Karleby is a writer, content producer and performer originally from Michigan. His writing has also appeared on YourTango, Delish and Medium, and he has produced content for NBC, The New York Times and The CW, among others. When not working, he can be found tripping over his own feet on a hiking trail while singing Madonna songs to ward off lurking bears.