As much as it would be great to invite everyone and everything to a family wedding, sometimes that is just not possible.
At the end of the day, the logistics of travel, food, and event space all drive the guest list.
But some guests power through nonetheless.
A recent post on the “Am I the A**hole (AITA)” subReddit offered a prime example.
The Original Poster (OP), known as Philly467997 on the site, gave a short summary of the ordeal right in the post’s title.
“AITA For Kicking my brother in law out of my wedding when he brought his dog with him?”
OP began with a character description.
“Me and my husband got married a week ago. Not everything went quite as we planned.”
“The reason is my brother in law [Jack, 21-year-old male] he’s the youngest in the family. Extremely well cared for and everyone spoils him all the time.”
“For some reason he doesn’t like me. Always been passive-aggressive towards me and made awful remarks about me on several occasions.”
Then she discussed another key character.
“Jack has a German Shepard, a really big boy that he adores and takes everywhere. I gotta say his dog is very active and quite big.”
“He wanted us to include his dog in the wedding invitation we sent him.”
“His mom told me that. I told her that he can’t bring his dog and she acted confused asking why. Then said Jack and his dog always attend events together. And that Jack didn’t appreciate how disrespectful I was towards his dog.”
OP stipulated exactly where the issue laid.
“I have no hate for dogs I have a chihuahua that I got 3 years ago. But even she (bless her) can not be around Jack’s moody dog.”
“I insisted no dogs allowed and it caused some disagreements but I thought we had them solved.”
So OP was surprised by what happened next.
“At the wedding, Jack showed up with his dog and wearing a t-shirt with the words ‘dog dad’ on it. I was shocked when I saw them.”
“He sat his dog at the table my family was sitting at. Mother in law was smiling widely.”
And it all went about as she expected.
“His dog was running around ruining everything. Causing loud noise and making guests uncomfortable I swear and I’m not exaggerating some of my dearest nearest friends were leaving.
“I had enough after all people were feeling terrified/uneasy with the dog’s acting out.”
“I told Jack he needed to take his dog elsewhere so someone else can stay with him.”
But OP hit a wall.
“Jack refused and argued with me so I told him to leave.”
“Mother in law kept calling me unreasonable for telling her son to leave. She said I was the one ruining my own wedding and I needed to calm down and let Jack enjoy his brother’s wedding.”
“My husband stood there. Hands in his pockets saying he should’ve eloped if that’s how everyone was behaving at the wedding.”
But after all, it was OP’s day.
“I put my foot down and asked him to leave. He kept arguing with me but then took his dog and left.”
“The family were upset saying I shouldn’t have taken away Jack’s excitement to share his brother’s joy on his big day. His mother was extremely agitated and said I overreacted. That I just made it personal and was acting like a bridezilla kicking out an innocent dog and her son of the wedding.”
“I already made it clear but Jack was being mean trying to go against my wishes but still I’m the one at fault for kicking him out instead of figuring out a solution.”
Anonymous strangers weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
Nearly all Redditors who commented took OP’s side. They simply couldn’t believe her brother-in-law’s audacity.
“NTA, you made it clear from the beginning that the dog was not to attend and your MIL and BIL willfully ignored you.”
“From its behavior this was clearly not a trained service animal, but a badly trained pet which has no place at a formal event like a wedding, especially when the owner wasn’t specifically told to bring the animal.” — firefrenzie
“What an absolute bellend. NTA, dude. I love dogs too, but a rowdy dog has no place in a wedding…and neither does a spoiled toddler masquerading as an adult.” — captain_blazar
“Absolutely NTA, you don’t bring dogs to people’s weddings unless stated otherwise. You told him no and he did it anyway so he had to go. This was your big day and not a time for him to bring his dog that wasn’t allowed and make guests leave.” — LittleLemonBird
“NTA. Why do people feel so entitled at others weddings and other major events? It’s unreal.” — Chairmanca93
Others took issue with her mother-in-law as well.
“NTA, what is it with people monopolizing someone else’s wedding and then blaming the bride/groom for ‘ruining’ it?”
“This clearly wasn’t a service dog, and MILs s**t eating grin shows that they didn’t plan to listen to you from the get out, and they’re quite proud of their stupid selves.” — emr830
“100% NTA. You made clear that no pets were allowed at the ceremony. Whether Jack brought his dog out of spite or not, it was clear he refused to respect your wishes. I’m sure had the dog been a service animal, accommodations could easily be made, but as far as I can tell, it isn’t.”
“On top of that, it’s not the MIL’s position to say ‘You need to let his dog in, they go everywhere together.’ Unless she’s putting up money for the wedding to have a dedicated place for pets, then she’s in no position to make demands.” — Cobaltz_hans
“Your in-laws are selfish, selfish, selfish people. I hope your husband has learned to break from their patterns or you’re in for a long (or very short) marriage.” — thatonepersoniam
Plenty of Redditors shared that last sentiment and took aim at OP’s husband.
“NTA If husband just stood there, I’d be going for an annulment. Good luck with that family. You’ll need it.” — LynnieFran
“NTA, and if your husband cannot actively support you on this, divorce him.” — AntipodeanRabbit
“NTA. Where was your husband? Why was he not defending you? You are totally justified for not wanting this dog at your wedding.”
“Sounds like you should buckle up, because you are in for a wild ride with the family you just married into.” — 87_north
“Nta, but you don’t have a bil Problem, you have a husband Problem.” — altonaerjunge
OP’s Reddit post undoubtedly must have been good for peace of mind.
After all, she spent a whole day surrounded by people who left her feeling crazy for her totally legitimate expectations.