We can all admit that big milestone moments are fun to share and celebrate with our loved ones.
But it’s also important to remember that there’s room for everyone’s big moments, pointed out the users in the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITAH) subReddit.
Redditor LongMaintenance910 was excited to marry her fiancé and had been anticipating sharing the announcement of their engagement with her family.
But when her sister interrupted her announcement by sharing she was pregnant with her third child, the Original Poster (OP) decided to overshadow her baby shower with her announcement instead.
She asked the sub:
“AITAH for ruining my sister’s baby shower after she hijacked my engagement announcement?”
The OP was excited to share her engagement announcement with her family.
“I’m Luna (25 Female), and I’m this close to losing it completely. I need to know if I’m the villain here because my family’s acting like I committed a federal crime.”
“I’ve been with my fiancé, James (27 Male), for five years. We finally got engaged last month, and I was so excited to share the news with everyone.”
“This was huge for me. I’ve always been the low-key one in the family, and this engagement finally felt like my moment.”
But the OP’s sister stole her moment, just like she felt her sister always did.
“My sister, Rachel (28 Female), is the golden child. She’s pregnant with her third kid (with her useless husband who barely works, but that’s another story), and my parents treat her like she’s the second coming of the Virgin Mary.”
“Don’t get me wrong, I was happy for her… until this s**tshow went down.”
“So, last weekend, we had a big family dinner. I’d planned to announce my engagement there; James and I even brought a bottle of champagne to celebrate.”
“We were sitting at the table, and right as I stood up to share our news, Rachel stood up, tapped her glass, and said, ‘We have an announcement!’ She then tells everyone they’re having a girl.”
“Cue the oohs and ahhs. My mom practically leaped out of her seat to hug her, and suddenly everyone was gushing about the baby.”
“My engagement ring was burning a hole in my pocket, and I just sat back down like an id**t. James squeezed my hand under the table, and I thought, ‘Okay, whatever, I’ll just wait for a quieter moment.'”
“BUT THEN Rachel turns to me and goes, ‘Oh, Luna, what were you going to say?’ And the way she said it, smug as h**l, like she knew she’d stolen my thunder, I was so caught off guard.”
“I just mumbled, ‘Nothing, it’s not important.’ She smirked and went right back to talking about the baby.”
“I was fuming. James was fuming. But I stayed quiet to avoid drama because, you know, family peace and all that bulls**t.”
The OP stayed quiet until the baby shower came around.
“Fast forward to Rachel’s baby shower two weeks later. I went because, despite everything, I thought, ‘Okay, I’ll be the bigger person.'”
“But the second I walked in, she was all fake smiles and said, ‘Glad you could finally make it, Luna!’ in that condescending tone that makes me wanna throw things.”
“I snapped. I don’t know what came over me, but I said, loud enough for the whole room to hear, ‘Yeah, wouldn’t want to miss another chance to have my moment stolen.'”
“The room went dead silent. Rachel’s face turned red, and she hissed, ‘What the h**l is wrong with you?'”
“And I said, ‘What’s wrong with me? You hijacked my engagement announcement, and you know it.’ Then I walked out.”
The family openly criticized the OP for her actions.
“Now my phone is blowing up. My mom says I ‘ruined the baby shower’ and that I’m ‘jealous’ of Rachel. Rachel’s been texting me that I’m a ‘bitter b***h’ and ‘selfish.’ Even some cousins are saying I overreacted.”
“But honestly? I feel like I finally stood up for myself. I didn’t yell, I didn’t break anything; I just told the truth.”
“James says I did nothing wrong, but now I’m doubting myself.”
“So, Reddit, was I wrong for finally calling my sister out and maybe ruining her baby shower?”
“AITAH?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some found it obvious that Rachel did this on purpose and deserved a ruined baby shower.
“NTA. Well done.”
“She knew what she was doing and now you returned the favor. Also, there were probably some people there who knew she was terrible and secretly enjoyed it.”
“Block all those people (including the mother who favored one kid over the other) and celebrate your wedding with people who actually like you.”
“Don’t let your sister come to your wedding, because she will find some way to pay you back.”
“Don’t let your mother come, either, because she will make it all about sister not being there.”
“So, no more time wasted on these people. Instead, get to know your neighbor better. Ask that nice person from another department for lunch. Give a compliment to the cashier who works hard and lives life without being held back all the time.” – Trailsya
“Golden Children don’t exist in a vacuum. Everyone knows what she is. My youngest sister was one and almost had ‘Golden Child’ branded on her forehead because it was so obvious to everyone except our mother.” – Emotional-Hair-1607
“OP should elope and focus on her new family. In fact, petty Betty me would gush to OP’s mom about how great her new mother-in-law is and how she can do no wrong. Taste of her own medicine and all that.” – PhotojournalistOnly
“Don’t invite either of them to pick out your wedding dress or anything else that should involve your mom and sister because they will make every appointment about them and completely ruin the experience for you. Good luck!” – No_Lavishness_4420
“You tried to let it go at the dinner, and she made you look like a doormat. The baby shower was the last straw, and honestly, I’m surprised it took you this long to speak up.”
“If she’s so upset, maybe she should stop making everything about herself.”
“Your moment deserves to be celebrated, too, and instead, she turned it into an afterthought. I don’t blame you for finally standing up for yourself. NTA.” – Greanded1a
But others felt this was an example of an OP making something out of nothing.
“Just so you know, OP admits in a [now-deleted] comment that this was a normal family dinner that this was NOT OP’s event, and OP admits that NO ONE actually knew she had news to share.”
“Why was it so wrong for his sister to announce her pregnancy the same way OP wanted to announce her engagement?” – FutureOk6751
“YTA.”
“She was faster than you to tell her news. You still could’ve told yours at dinner. Or announced some other way. It’s not a moment to be stolen. Your marriage is what’s important, everything else is just a vanity fair.”
“You were pissed, you read into nonverbal cues and possibly missed the mark by a mile, and you lashed out at your sister at a completely inappropriate moment. You were mean. Openly. Of course, your family is p**sed.”
“Take it to the end and lose it, at least you’ll have some relief, or tone it down and stop this competition of the worthier news and passive aggressiveness. It’s all so dumb.” – Snakeinyourgarden
“If this went down as you describe, YTA.”
“You make a lot of assumptions that your sister was trying to steal your thunder when she didn’t even know about your engagement.”
“You are harboring a lot of resentment towards your sister and you are judging her every look and comment and assuming it’s all aimed to p**s you off or one-up you.”
“You’ve let your resentment and jealousy eat away at you for so long, you’ve become bitter and see the worst in everything she does and says.”
“You made an unnecessary scene at her baby shower and are trying to play the victim.”
“I suggest you seek professional help to learn how to deal with your jealousy and main character energy.” – OK_LK
“It seems like it’s the first girl and that’s why the announcement was important and why a baby shower was held. I’ve been to showers for the third kid because they’re either thrown by someone else, the child is a different sex than the previous children, or the age gap between the children is significant enough to need new baby items. Baby ‘sprinkles’ have become more popular as of late.” – countrybutcaribbean
“YTA, a revenge not well done.”
“Where I thought this was going, was OP announcing her engagement at the baby shower and ruining it that way. By stealing back the spotlight as everyone gushes over her announcement as she laps it all in.”
“What OP did, sounds more like she caused a scene (Even rightly so) by clumsily blurting it out, and running away. That doesn’t sound strong or deliciously vindictive or revenge-worthy. Like, I get the emotion behind it. Just not the method.”
“If she was going to steal focus, she could have at least used her words.” – Lithogiraffe
Even though the family dinner seemed to be just another family dinner, the way that Rachel jumped in, tapped her glass, and announced her pregnancy just as the OP began to raise her glass seemed suspiciously like she was rushing to share her good news just in case her sister had something to share.
But even if that were the case, as many Redditors assumed, the way the OP handled the situation was questionable. If she really wanted to share her news, it seemed there were far better ways for her to do it.