We sometimes find ourselves jealous of what our colleagues brought for lunch, wishing we were enjoying their leftover spaghetti bolognese instead of our usual peanut butter and jelly.
Other times, we are grateful for the lingering aroma our colleague’s lunch brought to the office break room.
However, not all foods have an aroma that everyone is drawn to, hence that old cliché of sneering at the coworker who cooked fish in the office microwave.
Redditor Imaginary-Chemical-8 often felt lucky that one of her colleagues brought a diverse array of food to share with everyone in the break room. One particular food this colleague brought, however, was a bit less appreciated, especially by the original poster (OP)
Specifically owing to the aroma that came with this food.
Having finally had enough, the OP asked this colleague if she could possibly cease bringing this food to work.
A request some of her coworkers found to be fairly insensitive.
Wondering if this was the case, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for asking my coworker not to eat her cultural food in the break room?”
The OP explained why she felt the need to ask her colleague to stop bringing a certain food to work:
“I (25 F[emale]) have a wonderful coworker (54. F), who I get along really well with.”
‘This coworker is Nepalese, and I am a white woman.”
“In the past she’s been kind enough to bring in different food from her culture for us all to try.”
“I have zero problem with her, or anyone else, bringing in food from their culture and I’ve really enjoyed some of the dishes and sweets she’s brought- especially the barfi she brought in earlier this year for Diwali.”
‘My workplace has lots of different cultures, and I usually don’t care what anyone else brings to lunch, at least until this situation.”
“A couple of weeks ago I noticed a horrible smell in the break room that was incredibly strong.”
“It was kind of like if you farted into a sweaty sock and stuck it to your face.”
“It was honestly inescapable within the room, even after I changed the rubbish bin.”
“I didn’t know what it was, but ended up going outside and eating in my car.”
“I figured it was just a one off but for every few days I’d smell it again!”
“I genuinely had no idea where it was coming from.”
“During this time, I just ate outside the building or in my car.”
“However, one day I walked in and it was somehow even stronger.”
“This day happened to be a day I had the same break as Jane.”
“I noticed she was eating a fruit and realized that’s where the smell was coming from.”
“I asked what she was eating, and she told me it was called durian (I think that’s how it’s spelled?), and she had only recently found a good market for them.”
“I said I was glad she was enjoying it but mentioned that its smell was quite overpowering and left the room smelling afterward.”
“I asked her if she wouldn’t mind eating it at home or going outside as the smell really lingers in the staff room.”
‘She said she never really noticed the smell but would do her best to do so.”
“She seemed a bit annoyed but hasn’t brought it into the break room since.”
“I was talking with a friend about this (also white), and she said I was behaving in a racist way towards my coworker and it was wrong to police her cultural food.”
“I argued that it wasn’t a cultural thing, and I’d have done the same if someone was microwaving fish or another smelly food.”
“This has caused a debate between us about if what I did was offensive, and while I do still think I was right, I am beginning to question if I could be viewed as in the wrong.”
“So Reddit, am I the a**hole?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
The Reddit community generally agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for asking her colleague not to bring durian to work.
While many felt the OP’s labeling durian as “cultural food” was a questionable way of describing durian, they otherwise sympathized with the OP, as durian has a notorious odor that the OP’s colleague should have taken into account before bringing it to the office.
“NTA.”
“It’s not racist to ask someone to not eat smelly food at work.”
‘It is a common rule that most workplaces have.”
“Them claiming that Durian fruit is a cultural food does not make you a racist for asking them to stop bringing it into work.”
“As you said, the same applies to foods like fish and egg.’
‘It is common courtesy not to eat foods that are strongly pungent in a shared space like an office, public transport, shared kitchen.”- Cautious-Job8683
“NTA.”
“Not eating stinky food in the breakroom is a normal thing.”
“Microwaving fish in the office is generally frowned upon precisely because of this.”
“This case isn’t even a matter of ethnic food or racism.”
“We are talking about Durian here.”
“Everyone and their mom knows Durian smells like sh*t to the point that it’s forbidden to take it on certain airliners.”- GladiusNocturno
“She was actually eating durian?”
“Fruit that’s banned in public places in a lot of asian countries?”
“NTA.”
“Your coworker is an a**hole.”
“Never bring smelly food into shared spaces.”
“Especially durian.”
“It’s gross.”- Maleficent_Notice873
“NTA.”
“Many work places ban ANY smelly foods from shared break rooms.”
“Examples: broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, fish.”
“You get the idea.”
“Not a cultural thing, rather a common courtesy thing.”- Ok_Conversation9750
“‘Some people regard the durian as having a pleasantly sweet fragrance, whereas others find the aroma overpowering and unpleasant’.”
“‘The smell evokes reactions ranging from deep appreciation to intense disgust’.”
“‘The persistence of its odor, which may linger for several days, has led some hotels and public transportation services in Southeast Asia, especially Singapore, to ban the fruit’.”
“So, ‘AITA for asking a co-worker not to eat food with an overpowering and unpleasant aroma that evokes intense disgust and which people are banned from eating in some hotels and public transport services in Southeast Asia?'”
“No, you are NTA.”
“Buy some Hákarl and eat that in the break room (if you can stomach it!) & if anyone objects just claim Icelandic heritage & that it’s a ‘cultural food’… good luck, especially as you probably won’t able to have the traditionally accompaniment of a shot of brienninvin to moderate the fact it taste like eating a used urinal block.”- rocking_womble
“NTA.”
“Durian should be illegal everywhere where it’s not naturally grown.”
“The natives are the only people that can stomach that sh*t.”- diagrammatiks
“I was ready to condemn you as a white snowflake, but durian is well known to smell terrible even if it tastes delicious.”
“NTA.”- msbeesy
“Many airlines and hotels who are Asian countries adjacent, have been known to ban Durian.”
“Not your fault.”
“Even Anthony Bourdain ate some and ‘liked’ it, still had some things to say about it’s smell and aftertaste!”
“NTA.”- Ok-Pomegranate-3018
“NTA, but you phrased the title as though you asked her not to eat Nepalese food at work – it should be AITA for asking my coworker not to eat durian in the break room, so much preamble to read when lots of people know what the crack is with durian.”- marywiththecherry
“I think NTA in this case.”
“Durian is banned in many public places and public transportation throughout different parts of Asia due to its scent.”
“It surprises that your coworker would not realize its scent is bothersome.”
“I think it’s reasonable to ask she not bring it.”- Special_Respond7372
“NTA because it is durian.”
“Everyone everywhere, who eats durian, knows it smells like a**.”
“Her feigning innocence is infuriating.”
“This ‘cultural food’ is banned on public transit in some southeast Asian countries, because the smell is very well known.”
“It literally famously smells awful.”
“Its like surströmming, which famously smells so bad it makes people barf, and isn’t supposed to even be opened indoors.”- FacetiousTomato
There were some, however, who had trouble sympathizing with the OP, finding her perception of what constituted “cultural food” on the ignorant side.
“Durian is not some uncommon exotic food.”
“You aren’t the AH for not wanting to be around the smell, but YTA for turning this into a racial thing by assuming that if you haven’t seen something before she’s probably just eating it because she’s a different color than you are.”- FlatElvis
The OP expressed her excitement every time her colleague brought food that was new and unfamiliar to her.
However, bringing what is perhaps the most notoriously stinky fruit in the world to the office might have been pushing things a bit too far.
And despite the misgivings of the OP’s one colleague, one imagines the rest of the OP’s office is also grateful they can go to work without enduring the notorious aroma of durian.