When things get lost or damaged, it’s often people’s first inclination to blame someone else.
Even if deep down, they know, they likely have no one to blame but themself, if there’s even anyone to blame at all.
Even so, these stubborn people still go to great lengths to prove someone else was responsible.
Sometimes even demanding compensation.
A recent Redditor was recently paid a visit by a friend, who came to meet the original poster (OP)’s new baby.
Unfortunately, during an interaction with the OP’s infant, some of this friend’s property was damaged.
While the friend demanded that the OP compensate her for her damaged property, the OP flatly refused.
Wondering if she was being unfair, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for refusing to pay for our firends now broken Iphone and sunglasses that our son broke?”
The OP explained why she was unwilling to compensate her friend:
“I am 28 F[emale], and my husband is 32 M[ale]; our son in question is 6 months old.”
“Whenever someone holds them, we warn them that they’ll try to grab your glasses or phone, and sometimes even your hair.”
“We are trying to break this habit, but he is 6 months old.”
“Now, I warned my husband that a friend of mine, 33 F, let’s call her Jean, came to visit and wants to hold, which we didn’t mind at all.”
“I warned her about it all, saying, ‘ohh, best taking your sunglasses off your head, he’ll grab them’. “
“Now these are Gucci sunglasses costing almost 800 pounds ( which to me is a crazy amount for sunglasses, but each to ther own), she rolled her eyes at me, and accused me of hogging my own baby.”
“I warned her again, she said, ‘It’s fine’.”
‘So she stood holding him.”
“Took her phone out wanting to take a selfie, which again I am fine with as long as it’s not posted )(don’t want a pic of him online as of yet).”
“He, of course, grabbed her sunglasses, got excited as he got them, waved his hands about the sunglasses, and they flew.”
“She screamed, scaring him.”
“He panicked and flailed, hitting her iPhone to the floor.”
“I quickly took him as she was freaking out.”
“She says I need to buy her a new iPhone 16 and replace her sunglasses, or give her the money for them, which is £2300.”
“I said, ‘we can’t pay that as that’s not even my monthly wage’.”
“Plus, I am on maternity, but also I dont feel like I should, as you ignored my warnings’.”
“I’m called Heartless for not being more understanding of her upset.”
“I was more concerned with calming down my son.”
“My husband just shrugged, telling her I did warn her.”
“So AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for refusing to reimburse Jean.
Everyone agreed that not only did the OP give Jean fair warning that she was putting her sunglasses and iPhone in danger, but the OP’s child was an infant, and genuinely had no idea what he was doing.
“If your child were 6 years old, I could see an argument for not having taught your child proper behavior.”
“However, in this situation, the kid is only 6 months old.”
“You provided adequate warning, so NTA.”
“You owe her nothing.”- HiddenThinks
“When I read the top, I thought surely you’re responsible.”
“But NTA you warned her, specifically about the glasses.”
“She overrode your suggestion.”
“A 6-month-old is still a bundle of nerves learning how everything works.”
“Also 800 pounds for non-prescription glasses is indeed stupid.”- Ok-disaster2022
“NTA.”
“Your financial situation is not relevant.”
“If it were your responsibility, it would remain so.”
“You would be asking for kindness for the debt to be forgiven/ reduced.”
“But you are NOT responsible.”
“You duly warned her.”
“She took responsibility when she rolled her eyes, dismissed your warning, and said, ‘it’s fine’.”
“End of story.”
“End of discussion with her.”
“I’m guessing she wanted a selfie of the baby and her – with her fine Gucci glasses.”
“That mattered more to her than safeguarding her stuff.”
“She could have also asked you to take a picture of her and the baby.”- swillshop
“NTA.”
“You: ‘Don’t touch that, it’s hot’.”
“Her, while staring you in the eye, touches it.”
“‘OWWWW!!! Why didn’t you tell me?!?'”
“All her problems are of her own making.”- Wonderful_Two_6710
“NTA.”
“She f*cked around, she found out.”
“Such is the order of things.”- sailor_moon_knight
“NTA.”
“You did warn her.”
“If she calls you ‘heartless,’ simply agree with her.”
“‘Yes, I guess I am’.”- stroppo
I”t’ll probably end the friendship but you would not be the a- if you didn’t pay.”
“She was warned.”
“So I’ll go with NTA.”
“However, you need to realize that in life, it’s not always enough to warn and play FAFO.”
“Sometimes you have to say ‘Sorry, I’m concerned about what he’ll do to your belongings.”
“You can hold him after you put them over there’.”
“Or in a made up scenario, ‘I know your child loves dogs but I have to say no’.”
“My pupmay not react well to being pet by a toddler’.”
“You have to take charge so nothing actually happens.”- Just_Looking135
“NTA.’
“You were very clear multiple times that this was an issue for him.”
“I can’t help but ask, do you think this is a friend worth keeping?”- fodmap_victim
“Aside from the obvious NTA.”
“Why would you need to buy a brand new iPhone?”
“She’s fishing.”
“Guessing the screen cracked?”
“Replacing the screen is a very viable option and way cheaper.”
“And probably what she’ll do.”- LGeorgeRox
“‘I let a baby play with my fabrigé egg and now I want the parents to buy me a new one!'”
“Your friends vibe.”
“NTA you warned her twice.”- Reyalta
“NTA.”
“You warned her.”
“And specifically about the sunglasses too.”
“And don’t even consider trying to teach your infant not to grab at things.”
‘That’s just what babies do.”
“All babies, not just yours.”
“They are curious and want to explore everything.”
“And put it into their mouth if they can!”
“Everyone knows this.”
“You don’t own this person a dime.”
“She decided she knew better than you do so she chose to ignore your warning and left her sunglasses within baby’s reach.”
“And an infant doesn’t have enough strength to pry a cell phone from an adult’s hand, so she was not holding onto it firmly enough.”
“She could have handed the phone to you to have you take the shot.”
“If she really wanted one.’
“But why does she need a picture of herself holding someone else’s infant?”- 77Megg77
“NTA.”
“You warned her, and even if you didn’t, like every baby I’ve ever met likes to grab stuff from people’s faces/heads so that person is.”
“Kinda stupid.”- katiemorag90
“Clearly NTA.”
“And do not pay her. you warned her.”
“And she does not need a new phone, she needs her phone fixed (a fraction of the price).”
“If she can afford expensive glasses she can afford to replace them.”- TenderfootGungi
“NTA.”
“That’s like blaming the ‘Wet Paint’ sign after some idiot walks up and touches the wet paint after reading the sign.”- Oh_No_Its_Dudder
“Nah, NTA.”
“You gave her clear warnings and she brushed them off and then freaked out when, what you said would happen, happened.”- Advanced_Cow_2984
“Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.”
“NTA, totally on her.”- devilscape
“NTA.”
“But people today take no responsibility for the consequences of their actions.”
“Next time refuse to hand them the baby if they don’t listen to you.”- Living-Assumption272
“NTA.”
“You gave her a very clear warning which she acknowledged and chose not to pay attention to.”
“You do not owe her a replacement, she was told the risk and given the chance to accept the risk.”-roosterSause42
“Normally I’d say ‘you broke it, you bought it’, but you clearly warned her and she said ‘it’s fine’.”
“She owns it.”
“Hopefully she learns to listen.”
“NTA.”- Jun1p3rsm0m
“NTA.”
“Ignore repeated warnings at your own risk.”- Kind_Substance_2865
“Babies grab ahold of anything they can get their hands on.”
“That’s pretty common knowledge.”
“NTA.”- JoeyCoco1
“NTA.”
“You did warn her.”
“She made her own choice.”- ScarletNotThatOne
“NTA.”
“you gave fair warnings that she chose to ignore.”
“It’s her own fault these items were damaged.”
“Sounds like your husband is also in agreeable with you which is great.”- Aliceneedscoffee
“NTA.”
“You warned her and she said it was fine so repeat that back to her.”
“Do not let her guilt you.”- Lets_go_fly
When children are told not to do something, and then end up breaking or damaging something as a result, they should face consequences.
In this case, however, it was Jean who ignored what she was told.
And it seems she deservedly faced the consequences.