Most parents want an escape every now and again.
Even parents who love their children more than anything in the world, as most parents do, look forward to a night or two away from them.
But for most parents, spending a night away from one’s children isn’t quite as peaceful and relaxing as it seems.
Owing to the fact that all they can probably think of is their children.
The son of Redditor remo90 missed his father so much that the original poster (OP) couldn’t help but call their husband while he was away at a bachelor party.
Something the groom-to-be did not appreciate one bit, and wasn’t afraid to say so to the OP.
Wondering if they had, in fact, done anything wrong, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for facetiming my husband so our toddler could talk to him during his brother’s bachelor party?”
The OP explained why they couldn’t help but call their husband while he was away at a bachelor party, much to the chagrin of the party’s other attendees.
“After my husband left for his brother’s bachelor weekend trip our son, who is 2, was very upset because he forgot to tell him that he loved him.”
“I thought he would forget about it and I did try to distract him but he was crying for hours over it and was refusing to sleep so I facetimed my husband in the hopes it would calm him down.”
“I was planning for the call to be a quick 5 minutes but they were talking for over an hour and I could tell that the others were getting impatient.”
“My brother-in-law text me later on and was upset with me because I had called my husband.”
“He said he was just asking me to give him one weekend of my husband’s time and if I needed help I should ask his parents or get a nanny.”
“He thinks I used my son as an excuse to check in on my husband which annoyed me so we had an argument through texts because I told him I’d call my husband whenever I wanted to.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community agreed that the OP was in no way the a**hole for calling their husband.
Everyone agreed that calling their husband was the OP’s only option to calm their son down, and it wasn’t their fault that they happened to talk for over an hour.
“Going to say NTA because it sounds like it was entirely the husband’s choice to keep the convo going for an hour.”
“He could’ve just said a quick ‘I love you’ and had a 5 minute call.”
“It’s like everyone is forgetting the husband is also an adult and could’ve hung up the phone.”
‘It’s not like the wife forced him to stay on the phone.”
“The husband could’ve hung up.”- forgetxreality
“Based on OP’s other responses, clearly NTA.”
“It could have been a 2 minute call if it needed to be.”
“Husband choose to keep it so long.”
“Brother should speak to husband, not to OP.”
“Am I correct in assuming, your husband was not at all annoyed by this?”
“And he was the one that choose to stay on the phone with your son for an hour?”- SDstartingOut
“He should take it up with your husband, who chose to stay on the phone with your son for as long as he did.”
“Being away for a whole weekend is a long time to a toddler, and an hour isn’t a lot when you consider the bigger pic and that your hubby likely would not have been able to call back in the evening due to festivities.”
“Your BIL and his friends could have went ahead, telling your husband to meet them later.”
“Your husband needs to put him in check for whining to you about it.”- bbygotbackbone
“Why is BIL talking to you if he’s annoyed with your husband?”
“He needs to talk to his brother about that.”
“And why are you talking to BIL about something so ridiculous?”
“If your husband wants to talk to his son that’s his choice.”
“He’s a dad, this happens.”
“If he didn’t want to talk to his child that long, I’m sure he could have gotten off the phone.”
“Brother needs to get over himself.”
“It’s not like he neglected the entire weekend festivities.”
“Literally talked to his kid who misses him.”
“Sounds like a great daddy!”- evrydayimstrugglin
“Your husband obviously has his priorities in order.”- Shel1950
“God some of these comments.”
“I have two toddlers and I know how upset they get when their dad is gone at work or our hunting or whatnot.”
“They are toddlers.”
“They can be heartbroken over things like this and that is ok.”
“Clearly the dad here didn’t have a problem with talking to his own kid.”
“He’s a dad and that always always comes first.”
“The wife is allowed to call and talk to her husband whenever she freaking wants.”
“Doesn’t mean she’s ‘keeping tabs on him’ I swear to god some of you people don’t know anything.”- kiwipiwi37
“I get the feeling your BIL isn’t going to have a very long marriage or a very good one with an attitude like that.”
“Seems your husband actually likes his wife and doesn’t mind having a FaceTime chat for an hour vs gotta get f*cked up with the boys right now.”
“An hour of conversation does not ruin the whole bachelor weekend smh.”- FujoshiJade
“Your husband can end calls, can’t he?”- caidzm
“Your husband was just being a good dad.”
“Your BIL is b*tching over 1 hour out of a whole weekend.”
“If he couldn’t take the call he would have ended it sooner.”
“Yea it’s annoying waiting around for someone on a call when ya have plans.”
“But BIL is takin it out on the wrong person.”
“He shoulda taken it up your husband.”
“Yeah I get that BIL might want his brother to himself for a weekend but just because he’s left the house your husband doesn’t stop being a father.”
“The expectation that men can just ignore their kids for a weekend is insane.”
“Daddy should have said ‘I love you’ before he left, of course.”
“But in all honesty, OP’s husband is the one who let a conversation with a 2-year old, somehow, cut into his brother’s bachelor party for an entire HOUR.”
“If anyone is to blame, it’s him.”- Spiffy_Posidean16
“Obviously your husband didn’t care.”
“He’s a grown man that is in charge of his own time.”
“I’m sure he would have ended the call earlier if that’s what he wanted.”
“BIL needs to direct his annoyance at the correct person and get out your inbox.”- whippinflippin
‘Your husband decided to talk to your son for as long as he did, and if his brother has a problem with that, he can a) get over it and b( be mad at your husband not you!”
“I don’t get why he’d waste more time texting you how mad he is when he seems to want to spend time with your husband and his friends.”- bobertf
“NTA because this is nobody’s business except you and your husbands.”
“Your husband could have declined the call or kept it to a minute or two but he chose instead to engage with his son for a longer period.”
“BIL should have taken it up with your husband if he had an issue.”
“BIL is wanting to blame you specifically, which is inappropriate and unacceptable.”
“Your husband clearly finds his son more important than the bachelor party so it sounds like he has his priorities in line.”
“Your husband should set BIL straight instead of letting him blame you.”
“Once husband shuts this type of behavior down immediately, hopefully BIL will stop his nonsense.”-Mirvb
“Years ago my husband traveled to Europe on business.”
“We had a toddler at the time.”
“If he was out late with colleagues he would excuse himself to talk with our daughter or tell her his version of a fairy tale.”
“It’s what dads do, or should do for their child.”
“Anyone that thinks a parent talking to their kid is wrong really needs to rethink their priorities.”-d4dana
“NTA sorry but you can’t tell me I’m not allowed to call my husband.”
“If husband really wanted to he could have gotten off the call sooner than he did.”
“Or he could have chosen not to answer in the first place, I mean he would have seen you and your son when it was ringing to FaceTime.”
“Your husband probably just missed his son.”- Snowconetypebanana
As bachelor parties are known to be the last night of “freedom” and debauchery for the groom to be, the frustrations of the OP’s brother-in-law are somewhat understandable.
Should he ever become a father, however, his brother’s inclination to stay on the phone, even in the midst of a bachelor party, will likely become more understandable.
One hopes he apologizes to the OP long before then, however.