Teen pregnancy is a serious issue for many families. How those families handle it can impact the life of the pregnant teen and any children that may result from the pregnancy.
One father who felt he did everything right only felt anger and betrayal when he found out his daughter was pregnant. After lashing out at his daughter he turned to the “Am I The A**hole” subReddit for feedback.
Redditor throwRAconvo asked:
“AITA for telling my wife that I don’t have to speak to our daughter until I feel comfortable?”
The Original Poster (OP) asked:
“Found out a couple days ago that our daughter (17) is pregnant. I was so angry that I just went numb and walked away.”
“I’ve never been so disappointed in my life. We used to be super close but I don’t even talk to her anymore.”
“Today my daughter came over to me while I was watching TV and asked if we were still watching the SuperBowl together.”
“I was going to ignore her, but I told her, ‘This is the last time I’m speaking to you because obviously everything I’ve been telling you over the years just goes in one ear and out the other’.”
“‘I’ve never been so disappointed in my life. I told you about safe sex, condoms, birth control’.”
“‘On top of that, you betrayed my trust. You used to tell me everything’.”
“‘I argued with your mother all those times about letting you go to your boyfriend’s house because I thought you were responsible and that you would come to me if anything happened. But I was wrong’.”
“‘So from now on, don’t talk to me ever again. Anything you want to talk to me about, go tell your mother and have her pass it on to me’.”
“Later, my wife comes into my den and asks what happened. I told her to ask her daughter.”
“She said she did but she couldn’t understand her because she was crying so much. I told her what I had said, and she got upset and said that I have to talk to her.”
“I told her ‘No, I already did. And I’m not talking to her again until I feel comfortable, and I don’t know when that might be. Maybe never’.”
“Our daughter told us she was pregnant not last Friday, but the Friday before that. Like I said I haven’t been speaking to my daughter since then, but my wife used to tell me what was going on until I told her to stop.”
“What I’ve been told:”
“▪︎The boyfriend wants to be a part of my daughter’s life and raise the baby.”
“▪︎His family is supportive.”
“▪︎My daughter and her boyfriend were practicing safe sex and using condoms, but he ‘ran out’ one day and they decided to use the pull-out method.”
“And that’s when I told my wife I didn’t want to hear any more.”
Redditors weighed in on the situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors were of one mind in their response.
“YTA. ‘I thought you were responsible and that you would come to me if anything happened’.”
“She did. You walked away.” ~ SweetPotatoFamished
“Yes this. She now knows that when dad said she could always come to him,that he didn’t really mean it.” ~ Wickedlove7
“My mom got pregnant when she was fourteen. This was in 1987 I believe, in a really small, super religious town in east Texas.”
“She was absolutely petrified to tell her strict military parents but one thing that always stuck with her (and me) was when she told her dad, fully expecting him to drop the hammer, he sat her down, put his hand on her leg, and said ‘we will get through this together’.”
“It was incredibly hard for them but she was forever bonded even closer to her dad because he was there for her when she needed it despite his feelings of disappointment and anger. That’s what it means to be a parent and that lesson has stayed with me generations later.”