The phrase “no is a complete sentence” is getting a lot of mileage lately.
But what do people mean when they say it?
If a person asks for something or for someone else to do something for them, they should be prepared to hear the word “no.” And the person saying no doesn’t owe an explanation or justification that satisfies the other party.
They asked, the answer was “no” so they need to move on.
But we all know those people who can’t take no for an answer. Spoiled, entitled, self-absorbed, stubborn… many things can contribute to their inability to accept not getting the answer they want.
But while asking again, tantrums or arguing are annoying, they pale in comparison to the person who hears “no” then ignores it and does/takes what they wanted anyway.
A 23-year-old woman was dealing
Redditor RS3770967 asked:
“AITA For calling the cops after my halfbrother took my car while I was having dinner with family?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“I have always been civil with my 19-year-old half-brother. We were close as kids but he started to have an attitude at 13 and pretty much stopped being nice and started messing with my things/making fun of me and doing pranks to annoy me/privacy was gone with him coming into my room and taking my things.”
“Whenever I complained my stepmom would normalize his behavior and make excuses. My dad never really grounded him and thought that talking to him will get him to behave better.”
“I’m currently in college. I live in a rented apartment and have a car to help me get to the university or other places.”
“The car isn’t expensive or fancy at all. I saved up for it 2 years ago.”
“I decided to have Christmas dinner with my family. It’s the perfect opportunity to be with family since I haven’t seen my dad in a while.”
“I arrived at my dad’s house and left my purse and my keys on the kitchen island after my stepmom told me to help with dinner.”
“My half-brother started talking about my car in the kitchen while my stepmom was listening and asked if he could take it for a couple of hours to hang out with friends.”
“I politely told him no.”
“He threw a fit and brought up how I needed to relax and not worry but my answer was still the same.”
“While we were sitting at the dinner table, my half-brother got up, washed his hands and I thought he went outside. I got busy talking to my dad.”
“After I got up to wash my hands I noticed my car keys weren’t there. I went outside to ask him and neither he nor my car were there.”
“I lost it. I started calling his phone but he hung up on me several times.”
“I was furious.”
“I told my dad I’d call the police if he didn’t come back with the car.”
“My stepmom jumped to defend him and said I was being unreasonable to call the police. I called him one last time then I called the police.”
“My stepmom freaked out when my half-brother got picked up by the police. She told me to go explain the situation to the authorities otherwise he’d spend the night in jail.”
“But I refused especially since I still hadn’t got my car back.”
“Stepmom yelled that I ruined dinner and that it was no big deal. He was going to return it after ‘borrowing’ it from me but he didn’t really borrow it and she heard me say no.”
“I don’t know what she told the police. But I didn’t give permission to use the car.”
“My stepmom’s side of family are mad at me for doing this to my brother and hinted that I don’t consider him family. My dad’s side of the family sided with me saying he deserved it.”
“My dad said I overreacted and I shouldn’t have called the police when he disappeared for 4 hours. He DID NOT borrow it but my stepmom said I let him borrow it which is not true.”
“I talked to the police about what happened and I learned later that my stepmom said that her son was allowed to borrow it and that it was a misunderstanding.”
“I wasn’t going to let her continue to lie but my dad told me to back off and let it go.”
“This really upset me. My half-brother wasn’t even berated the way I was by the family.”
“My stepmom thought I ruined the night and overreacted because he just ‘borrowed the car from me’ even though I told him no right in front of her.”
“My dad is indeed letting me down by how he reacted in this situation.”
All I wanted was to have a peaceful dinner with family but my half-brother was being stubborn.”
Redditors weighed in on the situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole.
“Jeez… em… NTA at all. How can anyone consider it an overreaction?”
“He literally stole your car, after you told him you didn’t want him to use it. Why didn’t your parent/step parent offer to let him use their car?Â
“This should be a moment to show him about responsibility and accountability, not to blame you for standing your ground.”
“Your dad is really letting you down. Simply ask how he’d feel in a similar situation.” ~ dftaylor
“Why didnt your stepmother let him ‘borrow’ her car? He could have had a friend pick him up for a few hours.”
“Kid had options that didn’t require stealing your car… NTA. He will have to learn the hard way since your parents didn’t teach him.” ~
“Right? He sure didn’t borrow his mom or dad’s car.”
“He chose OP because he thought he could get away with it.” ~ kath4
“He stole OP’s cause he knew he would get away with it.”
“If I was OP, no way would I have let her be the one to talk to the police in his defence. I would have said ‘you want me to talk to the police about his behaviour? Okay then!!'”
“And explained the real situation. She knew stepmother would have said anything to get him out of this. She should have realised she would lie for him to be honest based on everything else about this post.”
“Not saying OP deserves this!! Just saying she should have been the one who continued communicating with the police instead of letting her stepmum.
“The outcome was obvious as soon as I saw that part of the post.” ~ tasharella
“This wasn’t about him needing a ride, it was about wanting to use OP’s car in particular and not feeling like he has to respect her property, same as when she lived in the same house.” ~ sharshenka
“NTA. Your stepmom is enabling his ridiculous behavior. He did in fact steal your car.”
“Your dad is enabling both their behaviours which must be disappointing. Your stepbrother hopefully has learnt that actions have consequences and will not pull that nonsense again.” ~ TheTaiTaiPartdeux
No means no.
Period.
Hopefully the OP’s half-brother can learn that lesson soon.