Actions have consequences.
Positive actions typically yield positive results, and the reverse is just as true.
So, what happens when someone makes a poor decision which, of course, blows up in their face?
And then they refuse to take accountability for those actions?
That was the issue facing Redditor and Original Poster (OP) Beneficial-Pin9059 when they came to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for judgment.
OP asked:
“AITA for expecting my brother-in-law to pay for my Seadoo after he let my nephew wreck it.”
OP got right to the setup.
“I just had my family out to the lake for Memorial Day. I work remotely from there, so it is not just a vacation home; it is my home.”
“I am single, and I like to buy myself toys. I also like to entertain.”
“I own two Spark trixx 800 cc Seadoos.”
“They are a lot of fun but also really powerful.”
“My sister and her family came up for the weekend.”
“We had a good time, and I had a blast towing the kids around on a tube.”
Everything was fine, until…
“The problem came when one of my nephews wanted to drive the machine. I said no because, while I may call it a toy, it is not a toy.”
“When I was in the house my brother-in-law let my nephew drive.”
“But they skipped a step because he is an idiot. He forgot to attach the tether clip to the life jacket.”
“The kid lost control and fell off.”
“Normally the tether is a dead man’s switch and turns off the machine if the rider falls off.”
“So then the Seadoo took off for a bit and then started making slow circles until it ran into a dock.”
“A bunch of the plastic on the top broke and some just got badly scratched.”
“They came and told me and I told him he had to pay for fixing my machine.”
“He is mad because it was an accident.”
“I said he took it and gave it to someone who didn’t have permission or experience, and he is responsible.”
“My sister and I talked, and she paid me for the parts I will need to fix.”
“My brother-in-law is pissed because it came out of their ‘fun’ budget, and now he has to save up again for their vacation.”
OP was left to wonder,
“AITA?”
Having explained the situation, OP turned to Reddit for judgment.
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
-
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided: NTA
Perspective is important.
“Why would your BIL allow his son to use this machine without ensuring his safety in the first place?”
“It came out of his ‘fun budget,’ boo hoo.”
“Be responsible.”
“NTA” ~ raviolilasagnaa
“You know what else would have come out of the fun budget?”
“The medical expenses for the nephew if the machine hasn’t narrowly missed him…” ~ B_A_M_2019
Some were surprised this didn’t go to legal.
“Uhh, I think theres a nonzero chance that BIL would have tried to get OP to pay for any medical expenses since it occurred while using OP’s equipment.” ~ mashuto
“They effectively stole the equipment and went for a joy ride.”
“BIL would have tried and failed.” ~ ThingsIveNeverSeen
“I feel like it’d definitely depend on the area and specifics of the situation on how a court case would go.”
“Like if BIL heard OP say no, depending on the area, they may be able to argue that BIL essentially stole the seadoo, rendering any injury BIL’s responsibility.”
“Attractive nuisance wouldn’t apply here because those laws apply to kids who don’t have the capacity to understand how their actions can get themselves hurt, not adults who have that capacity.” ~ AreYouAfraidOfChase
Not to mention the danger involved.
“Injuries from sea-doo/jet skis can be horrific.”
“My wife had a pt that fell off the back of one, and the jet caused so much damage the young girl has an ostomy now and likely will for the rest of her life.”
“Not having the kill switch engaged and letting a child drive it is unbelievably stupid.” ~ Dufresne85
“Yeah, honestly, everyone especially BIL, should just be relieved nephew is okay.”
“The fact he’s more worried about money means he doesn’t quite understand how big of an F-up it was and how it could have killed his son.” ~ Pokabrows
Responsibility.
“NTA”
“‘My brother-in-law is pissed because it came out of their “fun” budget, and now he has to save up again for their vacation.'”
“And if you paid, it would come out of YOUR fun budget. He gave the kid the key after you told them both no. He accepted all responsibility at that point. He can’t have his cake and eat it, too.”
“End of.” ~ KronkLaSworda
“NTA – your BIL should be kissing your @ss not to press charges.”
“That was stupid and dangerous, and he risked his own son’s life with his attitude.”
“For real, no means no.” ~ Slow_man_shuffle
“The BIL likely realizes that he f**ked up and is just immature enough to think that if he denies financial responsibility, then he is not the reason the accident happened in the place.”
“Not much to gain by pursuing it, but u/beneficial_pin9059 should have a chat with the nephew about what happened and that the results illustrate why he was told not to use the machine.”
“Lack of training, experience, and common sense led to this accident, but ultimately BIL overstepped his authority by granting permission to use.” ~ FragilousSpectunkery
“An unfortunate number of adults think that if they did not mean for a harmful result to occur, then they shouldn’t be held responsible for their reckless behavior that caused the harm.” ~ popcorngirl000
A docking question.
“I’m wondering if the dock suffered damage too? This was a dumb and very expensive mistake for BIL to encourage.” ~ AndSoItGoes24
“I’m curious to know whose dock got damaged: OP’s or a neighbor’s?”
“Either way, OP is NTA, and BIL is a big A” ~ shrutefarmsbeets90
“It sounds like it was on a lake. Lake docks are usually pretty flimsy, especially if it’s a smaller lake.”
“If it was someone’s little personal dock that they use to go out the back of their yard and go to their little skiff they use for bass fishing.”
“I could definitely see that dock getting creamed by an out-of-control jet ski.”
“Now a dock at any sort or marina is going to be sturdy and be able to stand up to getting hit by whatever boats the marina accommodates.”
“This doesn’t sound like the latter. Source: live on a boat at the marina/boatyard I work at. Part of my job is rebuilding/maintaining the docks.” ~ BobMackey718
But it was an accident!
“People are always trying just to waive the ‘accident’ wand to try and refuse responsibility for their actions.”
“You break something that you don’t own, and you pay to fix it. It doesn’t matter that it wasn’t intentional. As you said, it’s called being accountable for your actions.”
“In this case, it’s even worse because the kid didn’t have authorization to use the thing in the first place.” ~ Gibonius
“This was not an accident; it was negligent! He put his son in danger! He lucky he only had to swim back.” ~ Important-Egg-7764
“An accident is an unplanned or unintentional mistake that results in damage or injury.”
“What did NIL think was going to happen when a kid who is untrained to operate watercraft drives?”
“That’s not accidental or by chance damage, IMO.”
“It’s just BIL being reckless and st*pid. 🤣” ~ AndSoItGoes24
Fun can have consequences, too.
“NTA – I’m sure he and his kid had a great deal of fun wrecking your property.”
“If he believes he overpaid for the experience or would have preferred a vacation, all he has is buyer’s remorse, not an argument for nonpayment.” ~ 5thPLL
“NTA.”
“I hoped the BIL and nephew had fun stealing a vehicle and wrecking it.”
“Just be thankful that neither the nephew nor others at the lake were injured by their negligence.”
“At least the sister is sensible and paid for the damages.” ~ ICantDrive5
“NTA”
“What an awful human being.”
“It’s yours. He took it not only without permission but specifically knew he had no permission to allow his son to use it, and when the actually feared outcome occurs, he says it’s just an accident and shouldn’t pay for it?”
“Why should he ever pay for a vacation if it comes from the funds he needs for the next vacation?”
“He is fortunate that he has the money that HIS negligence caused.”
“That is called being a responsible person. He is pissed he has to be responsible, and that makes him the only AH in this.” ~ catskilkid
OP did return to set some worries at ease.
“My nephew wasn’t hurt.”
“Just scared because of falling off, almost getting run over by it, and having to swim to shore.”
Glad to hear no one was hurt but hopefully a major lesson was learned.
Accountability isn’t just about the money, of course.
But the money doesn’t hurt.