They always say, curiosity killed the cat.
There is a reason why.
When we look for things, we have to be prepared for what we find.
Snooping is sometimes going to lead to trouble.
Be prepared…
Case in point…
Redditor This-Bonus-922 wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback. So naturally, she came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
She asked:
“AITA for letting my MIL and SIL find our (hubby’s and mine) bedroom toys because I suspected they snooped in my drawers?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My (27 F[emale]) husband (32 M[ale]) and I have been dating for 6 years and married for 4.”
“We have a 3 year old baby boy and since we don’t plan on having more children, I told my husband that I wanted to get my boobs redone because I wanted them more perky and I had surgery last year.”
“My M[other] I[n] L[aw] has always been sniffy because my husband is her only son.”
“We’ve gone L[ow] C[ontact] over the years because she’s overbearing with him and dismissing with me.”
“Things got a little better when our baby was born, but after my surgery?”
“Oof, it’s like I wrote on my forehead ‘LOOK AT MY BOOBS, I WANT TO CHEAT ON MY HUSBAND!!'”
“She’s always implying that I did it for male validation (yeah, your son’s), that I’ll leave my husband, that I look like a hooker because I wear stuff that shows cleavage, that I could’ve gotten them a little smaller, everything.”
“She also complains about my clothes (and underwear) a lot, because ‘no married woman with a child should dress like this.'”
“And see, that’s what stung me because, how could she know?”
“I suspected she was going in my drawers.”
“But my husband told me that she could never, she made a comment about a cute set of lingerie that shows basically everything and I was confused.”
“I asked how’d she knows I have it and she said ”she saw it in the washing machine.'”
“But I prefer to wash my sets by hand so the lace lasts longer.”
“Anyway, we recently changed our bedroom and I had an idea to put an end to this, when I was restocking my drawers.”
“I used one in my vanity to put all of my husband’s and mines sex toys, a few sets and a dirty letter he wrote to me once.”
“My MIL visited us a few times and said nothing, so I did felt bad for accusing her, but yesterday she was here with my SIL and my husband and I were in the kitchen cooking for them.”
“We heard my MIL calling us and when we went to our room they were standing next to my open drawer, I just snorted, looked at my husband and said ‘See? she snoops.'”
“My husband got red in the face, berated my MIL and my SIL and they both left after calling me indecent.”
“My husband is mad at them, but he’s mad at me too because he says I shouldn’t have set a trap for his family and is saying we three need to apologize to each other.”
“So maybe AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA. They’re acting like you put a dildo in the cutlery drawer and waited for them to discover it while cooking dinner.”
“It’s not a trap, it’s just another drawer in your bedroom.” ~ MiruTheSloth
“I bought a big wooden dildo bottle opener, and put it in the kitchen drawer used for implements.”
“It took my wife a month to find, and my MIL not much longer.”
“The thing is that my wife goes into that drawer all the time.”
“Daughter noticed it within a few days, so she was in on the joke, and it killed us both every time someone else did not spot it.” ~ wellthatexplainsalot
“My wife’s father’s wife (she doesn’t call her stepmom) is like this.”
“She always snoops and seems to want to find something to criticize.”
“I recently told my wife that I wanted to do the exact same thing OP did.”
“We don’t have any sex toys but I wouldn’t mind buying a big dildo and put it in a drawer so she would find it and get scared.” ~ wantout87
“No no, the dildo doesn’t go in the cutlery drawer.”
“You put them ‘all’ in the dishwasher for ‘sex toy cleanliness day’ to do the thorough cleaning (of course wash after use, but every now and then you want to do the whole set for that extra bit of safety).”
“Now ‘that’ would be one hell of a find… ‘Lemme get a fork from the dishwasher… those are not forks.'”
“And NTA OP.”
“I love the people that set traps for snooping people in their home – if they didn’t snoop they wouldn’t find stuff they shouldn’t see.” ~ Malacoda85
“NTA. They really called you in to your own bedroom to berate you over what you keep in your own drawers?”
“Never let these people back in to your home again.” ~ emccm
“NTA, you kept your stuff in your drawer in your house.”
“If you go looking through someone else’s stuff you can’t complain about what you find.” ~ National-Priority729
“NTA. Your husband is a problem though- on what planet was that your fault???”
“His family shouldn’t be allowed back in your house because they invade your privacy and slut shame you regularly, they do it in front of him, and his reaction is for you to apologize too s[hake] m[y] d[amn] h[ead].”
“That’s outrageous.”
“You have every right to not be around people who demean you and violate your boundaries and to not want your children around them as well.”
“I would go no contact instead of low.” ~ MissionRevolution306
“NTA. It’s indecent for you to have sex toys tucked away in a drawer in the privacy of your own bedroom but her behavior isn’t?”
“She keeps intentionally snooping, trying to sniff out anything sexually related?”
“What the hell is her fascination with you and her own son’s sex life?”
“Maybe you should ask her.”
“Also, it’s not entrapment to put stuff in a damn drawer in a dresser you own, in YOUR bedroom, in YOUR house.”
“Are you just supposed to fill it with socks and hide everything else under a floorboard, lest mommy’s prying eyes find something to be offended over?”
“Your husband needed a slap of reality.”
“He got it, but he’s still not wanting to fully acknowledge or deal with it, because yeah he may be “mad at them” but he’s also still trying to put this on you.”
“It’s your fault he can’t continue to ignore it now.”
“He gets a YTA too, albeit a softer one than nosy MIL and SIL.” ~ ConferenceDecent4222
“NTA this is hilarious and exactly what you should have done.”
“If he wasn’t willing to listen that they were snooping you had every right to trap them.”
“Also, you have every right to out in your drawers what you want.”
“It is your house and your drawers.”
“Gross of MIL and SIL.”
“Your husband needs to apologize to you and put his mama in her place.” ~ SpaceCrazyArtist
“NTA. When a normal person accidentally opens a drawer in someone’s bedroom, say to borrow a hairbrush or hand cream, and discovers something ‘scandalous’ instead, they quickly close it and pretend they never saw it in the first place.”
“Stashing handcuffs and thongs in the pantry is a trap.”
“Moving your sex toys to a drawer in your bedroom is not.” ~ Any_Cantaloupe_613
“NTA. People went through your dresser – your private space — without permission for the purpose of shaming and/or embarrassing you.”
“You did not set a trap.”
“People should expect a level of privacy in their own homes.” ~ former-bishop
“NTA. F**K NO.”
“You better not apologize, girl.”
“Is having a burglar alarm and security cameras setting a trap for someone who would rob you?”
“Is locking your car and setting the alarm setting a trap for car thieves?!”
“F**k no it’s not. It’s called a deterrent and also proof.” ~ TashiaNicole1
“Hahahahaha NTA. They fucked around and found out.”
“Refuse to apologize hubby is only embarrassed and ashamed you were right.”
“He needs to keep his head out of his rear end.” ~ REDDIT
“NTA. Your MIL and SIL had no business snooping through the drawers in your bedroom.”
“You didn’t set a trap, you simply placed things in a drawer.”
“MIL and SIL are the AHs here for snooping through your drawers and being upset at what they found.”
“Tell hubby to grow up.” ~ Algebralovr
“NTA at all. I am so PROUD of you!!!”
“You should not have set a trap?”
“If your MIL had not been snooping, she would not have walked into it.”
“YOU deserve the apology, not them.”
“They invaded your privacy.”
“Your husband needs to put his big boy pants on, ACT like a husband and demand that THEY apologize to YOU!” ~ REDDIT
“NTA, and this is hilarious.”
“You are a full grown adult and you can store your sex toys wherever you like in your own home.”
“They went into your private bedroom and went through your draws.”
“I honestly wouldn’t blame you if you’d put a mousetrap in your underwear drawer.”
“They stuck their noses where they shouldn’t have and that’s what they get.”
“They don’t deserve an apology, and they don’t deserve to step foot in your home ever again.” ~ joanclaytonesq
Well OP, sounds like Reddit is with you.
Although, a sit down between everybody sounds like it maybe in order.
At least to set boundaries and have everyone on the same page.
But you certainly deserve privacy in your own home.