People who cook with cast iron swear by its properties.
In some families, who gets the cast iron makes it into the will.
But they aren’t like the Teflon-clad cookware most people are familiar with. At 97% iron, this cookware is susceptible to rust if not cared for properly.
And bare iron will bond to everything cooked on it, unless the pan is properly seasoned. While any amateur can probably turn out decent food on a cast iron skillet, they probably can’t clean the pan afterward.
So owners of well-seasoned cast iron guard it closely.
A cast iron aficionado turned to the “Am I The A**Hole” (AITAH) subReddit for feedback after their roommate repeatedly violated the cast iron rules.
Similar to AITA, the AITAH subReddit allows posters to ask for advice and post about ending romantic relationships—both things that are banned on AITA. However there are no official voting acronyms and no final judgment given.
Haunting_Standard413 asked:
“AITAH for hiding my cast iron pan from my roommate?”
The original poster (OP) explained:
“I (26, male) live with my roommate ‘Alex’ (25, male).”
“For the most part we get along great, but we have a recurring issue in the kitchen. I’m really into cooking and I’ve slowly bought some nice pieces of kitchen equipment for myself.”
“My favorite thing is a cast iron skillet that I’ve spent ages seasoning and taking care of. It’s kinda my baby.”
“Alex keeps using it without asking. I wouldn’t even mind that much if he knew how to clean it, but he treats it like any other non-stick pan.”
“He’ll leave it to soak in the sink overnight, use soap, or even use a metal scourer on it, which completely destroys the seasoning I’ve built up.”
“I’ve explained to him probably 4-5 times how to care for it, and asked him to please just leave it alone if he can’t remember. He always just says ‘yeah, my bad’ and then does the exact same thing a week later.”
“Last week, I’d had enough. I found it in the sink again, soaking in soapy water with leftover pasta sauce in it. I was so pissed.”
“I didn’t even say anything to him this time, I just cleaned it, re-seasoned the whole thing, and now I just keep it in my bedroom when I’m not using it.”
“Well, today he wanted to cook something and couldn’t find it. He asked me where it was and I told him honestly that I was keeping it in my room because he’s proven he can’t respect my property.”
“He completely blew up, saying I was being a petty and childish a**hole and that it’s just a f*cking pan. He’s telling our mutual friends that I’m creating a ‘hostile’ living environment over a piece of metal.”
“AITAH here?”
“I feel like I gave him plenty of warnings.”
Some Redditors weighed in by using the AITA voting acronyms:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided the OP was not wrong to protect his property (NTA).
“NTA. Tell him he doesn’t get to tell you how to feel about your stuff, and if he really wants to use a cast iron, he can get a Lodge on Amazon for $25 and treat it however he wants.” ~ ArcherBarcher31
“NTA. He’s creating a hostile environment by not respecting your property. He can stop acting like an immature brat and buy his own pan.”
“Twenty-five and gossiping about his roommate not letting him use his pan, and then claiming you’re creating a hostile living environment? I feel for any person who gets into a relationship with this guy.”
“He’s a drama queen. I hope your mutual friends see this flake for who he is.” ~ lilolememe
“NTA. I live in the South. We have cast iron skillets that are over a century old.”
“Steal a woman’s husband down here, and she’ll be mad at you. Screw up her cast iron skillet and she will kill you.” ~ GrimSpirit42
“NTA – hide your damn knives too. Send him to a cast iron shop website and tell him there are reasons WHY people pay huge amounts for these skillets, and since he doesn’t value the good tools, he doesn’t get access.”
“You’re much kinder than I am. There are 3 people who are allowed to touch my cast iron. My husband is NOT one of them.”
“My other pieces are vintage Wagner from two of my great-grandmothers. Smithy are the only pans I’ve ever tried that come even close to my antique Wagners.” ~ Archaeogrrrl
“NTA – You want people to respect your belongings. He couldn’t do that, so he can get his own cast iron skillet.” ~ WestStrength2719
“NTA, Alex can get his own gd cast iron pan, and he will quickly learn how he has no idea how to care for it, and even knowing you told him about seasoning it and cleaning it properly, will wonder why it ‘doesn’t work like yours did’.”
“Dolts are gonna dolt. You gave him more than enough chances to do right by your baby.” ~ Who_Knows_ambergris
“NTA – I have two objects around which my universe revolves: At home it’s my egg pan (I eat a lot of eggs) at school it is my laminator. F*ck with either and you are dead to me. It seems silly, but sometimes silly sh*t matters. If it is just a f*cking pan then it shouldn’t matter to him if he can use it or not.” ~ grouchykitten1517
“You didn’t hit him with the pan, so NTA. At the same time, he’s begging for it. If he wrecks the seasoning again, introduce his head to the pan firmly, and still NTA.” ~ Buzz729
“Tell him to go buy his own god damn pan. It’s why I loved it when I could finally afford to live by myself and toss my younger brother out. Sooooo nice.” ~ Big-Rule5269
“He can buy his own. Most people who know cast iron would never be sympathetic to someone who mistreats it. NTA.” ~ grayblue_grrl
“NTA. Alex needs to keep his filthy hands off other people’s property. This is why I live alone.” ~ Dis_engaged23
“NTA. Cast iron pans require proper care, and good seasoning takes time and effort to build. If he can’t respect that, then he doesn’t respect your property or you, and doesn’t deserve to use the good cookware. He can get a cheap skillet from a store for himself.” ~ Just_Ad2752
“I’m from the South. Currently clutching my pearls and having a fit of the vapors!!! He ain’t got a lick of sense and clearly has no proper home training!”
“Where I live, treating good cast iron like this is akin to taking the Lord’s name in vain! It’s a sin!!! He’s lucky you didn’t use it upside his head! NTA!”
“Seriously though, if roomie can’t treat your things with respect, they lose access. Why can’t they go and buy their own skillet?” ~ MysteriousWays14
“NTAH. You tried giving him instructions to ensure he could continue using your cast iron pan and he blew you off. He gave up that privilege the minute he soaked it in water this last time.”
“He had a chance and blew it. He needs to get his own pans anyways…because he’s a f*cking adult!” ~ Jovon35
“NTA – I’ve lived with people who’ve had special cookware etc before, and sometimes I’ve been given the, you can use this but: insert lists of rule needed for appropriate care here.”
“And you know what I did if I felt like I wouldn’t have time or be able to remember the rules? Never used that pan/item.”
“Because people are allowed to have nice things. And I can use another pan.”
“Your roommate likes the function/benefits that your well-seasoned pan brings, but he just can’t be bothered to follow the rules. It’s not that he forgets, you’ve literally gotten upset at him before, and that should stick in his brain.”
“Also, if he’s looking for the pan specifically, it’s not that he’s just absentmindedly grabbing any pan and not realising it’s the special one.”
“He just figures it’s easier to make you do the work of caring for it.” ~ samdoeswhatever
“Start swinging his console around by the power cord or play on it with two hammers and ask him why he’s getting so bent out of shape, it’s just a toy.” ~ Confector426
“Don’t let this self-entitled prick use so much as a grain of salt of yours from here on in. They always get mouthy when the resource they feel entitled to goes away.” ~ 13artC
“If it’s just a pan, then it shouldn’t matter, and he can get his own and leave it dirty all he wants. He thought he was slick by using it, leaving it dirty, and magically finding it clean again so he could repeat.”
“Nope. F*ck that guy. He never ‘forgot’ about your boundaries with the pan; he ignored it because it benefited him if he did so. He could make a mess and ‘forget’ and then you would swoop in to save it and clean up after him.” ~ Efficient-Tailor7223
“He needs to buy what he wants. Goodwill or garage sales. It’s time. He’s old enough to own his own pans. That’s how I started out.”
“Actually, I think I just bought actual new stuff, like brands at stores, with a new house about 6 years ago, at 60.” ~ LiveLongerAndWin
Protect that cast iron, OP.
Roommates are replaceable, but a great skillet…