Putting together a family gift for a loved one is meant to be a touching show of affection.
Pictures of all of the kids and grandkids on something fun or sentimental can brighten a lot of grandparents’ days.
However, what is meant to be a fun, thoughtful project can often become difficult to produce.
Not everyone involved does their part to complete the process.
Redditor Fickle_Collar2459 wanted to discuss his experience and get some feedback, so naturally, he came to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subreddit.
He asked:
“AITA for replacing pictures of my cousins with pictures of my dog?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My grandpa’s birthday was a couple of weeks ago.”
“Six weeks before his birthday, I texted all of my siblings and cousins (there are 9 of us) and told them to send me a picture of themselves within the next 4 weeks so I could put it on a phone case for our grandpa’s birthday.”
“Two weeks later, I sent the text again, saying I needed a picture of them, and anybody who chooses not to send a picture will be replaced by a picture of my dog.”
“I had three cousins tell me to screenshot something from their Instagrams.”
“I didn’t respond.”
“I sent a text out the day before I put in the order, saying anybody who did not send a picture of themselves in the next 24 hours would be replaced by pictures of my dog.”
“The same 3 cousins never sent pictures.”
“Their spots have my dog in a sombrero, my dog at the pumpkin patch, and my dog in a chicken costume.”
“They came over for my grandpa’s birthday and saw him open his new phone case.”
“They saw that their pictures weren’t on the case and got mad at me for not picking something off their Instagrams like they told me to.”
“I said that I sent 3 reminders to send me a picture with a clear warning that anybody who did not send a picture would be replaced with a picture of the dog.”
“They knew exactly what would happen.”
“My grandpa finds it hilarious, but their parents are telling my parents that I kept them off the phone case on purpose, and they want me to apologize.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“AITA for replacing them with pictures of my dog because they never sent me a picture?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question, AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.
“Grandpa liked it.”
“That’s all that matters. NTA.” ~ Hawaiianstylin808
“They DIDN’T participate in the project.”
“OP gave them multiple weeks and multiple notices to send a pic and even told them what would be on it if they didn’t.”
“OP paid for it, and whether it was a solo gift or supposed to be a group project is irrelevant.”
“They can’t get upset that they’re not on it, or even that they look bad, if they didn’t want to take the time to ensure that neither was the case.” ~ Your_Daddy_1972
“I agree with your point and the lazy one.”
“I think both are true.”
“The 3 said to take pictures off of their Instagram, so clearly they can send and post pictures with no issues.”
“It’s just that they couldn’t be bothered to make that TINY bit of effort for a gift for good ol’ gramps.”
“Also, I’m wonderfully glad that he enjoyed it.” ~ AaliyahFurry
“Right?!”
“They literally could have screenshotted their own Instagram and texted it to OP.”
“They didn’t even have to get up or look away from their phones, and they couldn’t even do that tiny, one-second task.” ~ Kathrynlena
“NTA. Hope Gramps leaves you all his money.” ~ stoligirl2121
“Good, they never chipped in, so don’t have a say in the matter.”
“They were given plenty of time to send a picture, but they were too lazy to do it.”
“What if you picked a picture of them from their Instagram that they didn’t like?”
“Would they be just as upset, probably.”
“You gave them a chance to send you a good picture of themselves, but they were too lazy.”
“Grandpa loves it with the dog pics, so that is all that counts in the end.”
“They didn’t chip in, so they don’t get a say.” ~ Several-Finish-3216
“NTA. You gave them plenty of warning and told them exactly what would happen if they didn’t send.”
“Yeah, you could’ve screenshot something on their socials, but they didn’t want to make any effort, so they didn’t need to be on the gift.” ~ Your_Daddy_1972
“This story has many elements I enjoy: an earnest narrator, lazy cousins, a picture of a dog in some kind of headgear, and a laughing grandparent.”
“Your lazy cousins and the hand-wringing relatives can kick rocks. NTA!” ~ SalaudChaud
“NTA. For those saying it’s not that hard for OP to go to each of their IG accounts and screenshot a pic, it’s even easier for each of those cousins to do it for themselves because they know which photo they would like OP to use, and OP doesn’t have to try to choose.”
“Like seriously, if they want their pic on a gift that OP is making and paying for, they can freaking send in their own photo.”
“The audacity to tell you to go get a pic of them.”
“They were so lazy.”
“They didn’t participate after multiple warnings, which you were very kind to give.”
“Didn’t they clue in that you kept giving warnings and they hadn’t participated or even checked in with you, like, hey, were you able to get a pic off my IG?”
“And their parents telling you to apologize, F that.”
“Tell the cousins and parents to grow up.”
“They should be happy you asked everyone in the first place.”
“The requirements were clear, and they chose not to participate.” ~ prairieice
“Exactly, OP organized it and paid for it, and they couldn’t be bothered to spend an entire minute picking out a photo from their socials to send for it.”
“I mean, in a month, you know they have to have been on there at least once to post something or scroll through their feed.”
“And they still wouldn’t take a second to send a photo.” ~ readergirl35
“NTA. You warned them.”
“They wanted you to do all the work.”
“Petty would have been finding the worst possible photos of them to use.”
“They didn’t care enough then to spend a few minutes picking a photo to send you; it’s too late to care now.” ~ nemc222
“Context: was this a group gift or just from you, with all of them in mind?”
“It really won’t change my mind, but some people may need that context.”
“NTA. Don’t be a lazy team project person and get angry when you’re not on the final product.” ~ CommunicationMean158
“NTA, they have no right to complain, they knew exactly what would happen if they didn’t make a small amount of effort because you told them exactly what you’d do if they didn’t.”
“Show their parents your messages; this is entirely on your cousins.”
“Your a-hole status may change if you don’t show us the dog photos though!” ~ elevenohnoes
“NTA, and honestly, this is hilarious.”
“And I say this as exactly the type of person who would have forgotten to send the pic and been replaced by a dog.”
“Look, some of us are Not Good at this type of thing.”
“If we’re halfway decent people, we know this about ourselves and live with the consequences.”
“And even laugh at them sometimes.” ~ jupitersbears
“NTA. It was generous of you to offer them the chance to have their pics included, and reasonable for them to spend those few minutes sending a pic to you.”
“Any who chose not to could reasonably be seen as opting out, which you essentially gave them the option to do.”
“Anyone complaining has no one to blame but their own lazy arse for not doing the bare minimum.”
“Also, your solution was ingenious and hilarious.”
“Your grandpa got a good laugh out of it, you got some great memories, and maybe your cousins learned a lesson!” ~ Prestigious_String20
“In the length of time it took them to reply for you to take something off their Instagram, they could have shared a photo from their Instagram.”
“NTA, and I’m happy your grandpa loved it.” ~ Alfredthegiraffe20
“NTA, you gave them warnings, and your grandad found it hilarious, that’s all that matters.”
“At the end of the day, it’s a phone case, not a bespoke oil on canvas painting or a massive family portrait you intentionally excluded them from.”
“It’s a cool, fun gift that I bet your grandad will laugh at every time he picks it up.” ~ Vampyr145
“NTA. I did this once with our Christmas card.”
“My sister was not responding, so I chose the ugliest Pic of her I could find.”
“Sent out the proofs saying I was gonna order, and all of a sudden, I get the picture of her I had been asking for for about a week.”
“Now she knows if you don’t answer, I WILL be petty and find the worst picture of you.” ~ CreativeSoul555
“NTA, but there is a whole lot of lazy going on!”
“Your cousins weren’t out of line by saying you should download their photos.”
“It’s your gift, so it isn’t unreasonable for you to do the work.”
“But it only takes a minute for someone to send you a photo of themselves that they like and approve of.”
“I really hope you added names to the photos, though.”
“Like Billy under the sombrero pic, Jill on the pumpkin patch… that would make it easy to prolong the pleasure of having your dog take their places!!”
“Jokes every year!” ~ fromhelley
“Oh no!”
“The absolutely clear consequences of their behavior happened as previously warned numerous times!”
“Who could have foreseen this?!?”
“Not them, apparently.”
“Happy birthday Gramps and NTA OP.” ~ YarnsAndYawns
Reddit is with you, OP.
They were being lazy.
If they had cared enough, they would’ve sent the photos.
Glad that your Grandpa enjoyed the gift.