In business communication, there is a general expectation of clarity. However, rules for written versus verbal and in-house versus with clients or the public often vary greatly.
For example, profanity is generally forbidden in written and verbal communication outside the office, but might occur often during in-house verbal communication.
So, is it appropriate to correct a coworker’s speech patterns during an in-house meeting?
An employee who thinks it isn’t turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for feedback.
Accomplished_Can_185 asked:
“AITA for getting annoyed that my coworker keeps correcting the way I pronounce simple words during meetings?”
The original poster (OP) explained:
“i (18 female) have a coworker who, every time I speak in a meeting, jumps in to ‘fix’ my pronunciation on random normal words. not major mistakes, just tiny things like where I put emphasis. she’ll literally interrupt mid-sentence to do it.”
“Today I finally said, ‘Can you pls stop correcting me while I’m talking?’ Not rude, just tired of being cut off.”
“She got super offended and said I embarrassed her in front of the team. Now she’s telling ppl I ‘snapped at her for helping’.”
“I honestly just wanted to finish a full sentence without grammar police popping up.”
“The thing is, she’s not doing it maliciously. I dont think im the a**hole, I dont think she’s in the right, but i think it’s like a social thing.”
“She’s used to doing this; it’s normal for her. Doesn’t make it right, but that’s what makes me kind of feel bad.”
The OP summed up why they might be the a**hole in their situation.
“I could be seen as being the a**hole for being annoyed at something innocent”.
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).
“NTA, but I’d be lying if I said I’m not curious what you’re mispronouncing to the point that this has become an issue.” ~ csgymgirl
“Also curious…. Is it a regional/accent/language thing: pecan, caramel, tomato, or work-related yet ordinary terms? If it’s the former, she can kick rocks.” ~ pgf314
“I grew up rural and on a farm. When I moved to a city, people would correct and mock my accent in very trivial scenarios. It’s a classism thing.”
“I subconsciously started code-switching to get people off my back. And, it worked. People having their speech policed based on their identity is a very real thing.” ~ Appropriate-Goat-584
“I had an intern from Lyon and an intern from Paris, and I caught the Paris one sneering that the correct pronunciation is roohhse and not rawse (for rose, the colour pink).”
“I put a stop to that immediately: agreeing to help each other is great, asking if you may make a suggestion is fine, once, but sneering about the Paris pronunciation being superior while we’re all in Brussels, and you don’t even speak Dutch or English yourself, that’s not on.” ~ Stormtomcat
“I was told to lose the southern accent, so I did. I was told this by a mentor who was told this by his own former mentor. To a certain extent, I think it’s fine.”
“I act differently in a professional context compared to when I’m with family, so why wouldn’t I speak differently?” ~ cjdavda
“I have a lot of thoughts on this topic, but I’m going to avoid dropping an essay here. Regarding your experience and feelings, I don’t blame you one bit for doing what you have to do to get sh*t done. I do the same.”
“I’m mostly Southern with a hint of Appalachian. Sometimes at work, I play up my accent depending on who I talk to in order to build rapport and trust.”
“Then other times, I try to kill it so people don’t make the wrong assumptions. It feels automatic at this point.” ~ Appropriate-Goat-584
“I do the same at work. Put me on a call with a Southern client, and the real me comes roaring out. Otherwise, I’m on a call desperately struggling to de-twang my en-vi-ron-ment and New Or-leans. Those two words, if I don’t flatten, identify me right quick.”
“I sometimes drop in phrases like ‘right quick’ in conversations, and my co-workers laugh at me. I work with a lot of global people, so I get asked what something means.”
“Then they’ll use it later, and then it’s my turn to laugh. All in good fun. No one has ever picked at me because of my occasional accent or turn of phrase.” ~ TodayIAmGruntled
“I learned to mask that Texas twang so well, I once got into an argument with a client who demanded to know where I was from. Born and raised in Texas, never lived anywhere else, but he basically called me a liar because I didn’t have an accent.”
“Put me on the phone with anyone from North Texas, though, and I’ll be twangin’ for the rest of the day.” ~ ScroochDown
“I did this too, and it was second nature once I got my first professional post-college job. To the point when I met a new coworker who grew up close to my hometown, they didn’t believe I grew up in my hometown based on how I pronounced certain words.” ~ sraydenk
“I grew up on the edge of Appalachia, so I can add a southern accent as needed, to smooth relations with customers. Otherwise, I just do radio voice.” ~ Mira_DFalco
“My wife always laughs about how I have the Blue Ridge accent when I’m talking to good old boys, but then it vanishes when I’m talking to ‘normal’ clients.” ~ MountainWeddingTog
“I moved to the UK from New Zealand and had a similar experience. I’d be giving a presentation, and my teammates would be giggling at my accent the whole time. I liked them so it was hard to be mad but still, c’mon guys.” ~ lexicats
“I live somewhere with a subtle, but noticeable if you are listening, accent. In my job, a little small talk is normal. So one day, as I often do, I said, ‘you don’t sound like you grew up here, where did you grow up?'”
“To clarify I am not from this area so I also don’t sound like I’m from here, and this is a regional thing, we were both the same generic White person, it was obvious I wasn’t asking if they were an immigrant.”
“He responded ‘Actually, I did grow up here.’ I said, ‘Oh wow where did you learn to pronounce “Ts”?'”
“He laughed and said he just graduated from college on the East Coast. I was like, ‘Ah, that explains it!’ His diction was much crisper than people tend to speak where I live.” ~ myssi24
“I didn’t even grow up rural, just in the south, and I will never forget my first day of drama class in college where the teacher made a huge deal out of the way I pronounced ‘theatre’ and made sure that everyone knew she thought I was a stupid, uncultured pleb who didn’t belong there.”
“Switched to speech class that night. Shame, because I’d really wanted to try my hand at acting.”
“She was also just so extra about how the first exercise was going to be us learning a script with lots of expletives because Real Actors Are Comfortable With Swearing.”
“Like, I mean. Yeah, I get that you don’t want folks getting precious over uncomfortable lines, but also is that really the very first thing you need to address? I mean, after losing your gaddang mind over ‘thee-ey-ter’ (‘It’s ‘th’ter!’)”
“Folks who can’t accept that other dialects are not ‘incorrect’ are just so gross.” ~ ThatInAHat
“I grew up in a rural southern area where the accent is most charitably aligned with the character Boomhauer from King of the Hill.”
“When I left home for educational purposes (and other reasons), I was treated as an idiot, called a ‘redneck’ and ‘white trash’ by my peers, until I learned to slow my speech, enunciate, and virtually erase my hometown accent.”
“A professor accused me of plagiarism on my first paper in their course, as it sounded ‘too academic for my background’. She gave me a new assignment, and I had to write it by hand, in front of her, before she believed I was capable of the level of work I presented first.”
“I finished and left without acknowledging her. She did apologize, though it was a humiliating object lesson for me in being judged by my speech patterns.” ~ kalixanthippe
“It’s incredibly rude to interrupt someone to correct them at all, let alone during a meeting!”
“The way to handle this would be to have a direct and private conversation, and then, if nothing changed, to talk to the supervisor.”
“But also, if this person is the company editor or w/e then fixing those mistakes is literally their job. Dont be salty about doing your actual job duties. Just get a different job if you hate it, don’t be rude to people.” ~ Librarycat77
“NTA, if she can call you out publicly then she can handle being called out publicly.” ~ lt_girth
“It all depends on what you were getting wrong. If you were saying pacifically instead of specifically, then it’s completely justified.
“In reality, no, NTA.” ~ I_am_legend-ary
“NTA. She was interrupting you mid-sentence over tiny pronunciation things that did not matter, and that is rude in any workplace. You asked her politely to stop so you could actually finish your thoughts.”
“That is not snappin,g and it is not embarrassing her. She embarrassed herself by making meetings about correcting you instead of listening.”
“You set a reasonable boundary, and she did not like it. That is her problem, not yours.” ~ 36cats
Proper pronunciation is generally regional.
Interrupting someone repeatedly to correct them is universally rude.