Who doesn’t love a home-cooked meal?
Well, maybe people who absolutely hate to cook, and either go out or order in for all their meals.
Of course, doing so will eventually become prohibitively costly, sometimes necessitating eating in.
What not everyone tends to acknowledge is that eating in can also end up being costly itself.
The husband of Redditor unfortunatelyalive7 wanted to ease up on their spending, prompting him to ask the original poster (OP) to cook more.
While the OP was happy to do so, she was less happy to do so under her husband’s more specific instructions.
As they didn’t really end up saving them money at all.
Wondering if she was out of line, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole Here (AITAH).
Unlike the similar “Am I The A**Hole” (AITA) subReddit, AITAH allows Redditors to ask for advice on issues that are not permitted on AITA, such as asking for advice or posting about ending relationships. Nor are voting acronyms required or a final judgment declared.
The OP asked fellow Redditors:
“AITAH for telling my husband he needs to eat leftovers?”
The OP explained why she was growing increasingly frustrated cooking for her husband:
“My (31 F[emale]) husband (35 M[ale]) won’t eat leftovers.”
“He says they ‘don’t taste right’.”
“We’ve been together for 13 years, and he’s never cooked a meal.”
“Neither of us likes cooking.”
“We’ve had a lot of takeout, but money is tight, so he asked if I can cook more again.”
“I said sure, no problem, I’ll cook a few larger meals and set aside portions to eat throughout the week.”
“He’s insisting that he won’t eat leftovers and that most people ‘don’t cook like that unless they’re trying to lose weight’.”
“My problem is that it’s hard (and expensive) to cook the exact amount for 2 people every day.”
“I just want to be able to meal plan in a way that makes sense financially and is less stressful for someone who doesn’t like cooking.”
“FYI, I don’t mind that I’m the one cooking and cleaning, as he works FT and I’m PT, so that isn’t the issue.”
“He’s just making me feel like I’m crazy for asking him to eat leftovers, and idk what to think.”
“I definitely grew up eating leftovers often, and I’m not trying to cook 1-2 individual meals per day.”
“AITAH?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP Fell in this particular situation, with some using the voting acronyms:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Everyone agreed that the OP had every right to be frustrated with her husband.
The Reddit community was just as perplexed as the OP was by her husband’s logic, agreeing that by refusing to eat leftovers, he was missing the point of eating at home:
“You probably shouldn’t be taking cooking advice from a grown man incapable of feeding himself.”-Ok-Eye1638
“It’s called meal prep and done for efficiency( time) reasons by loads of people.”
“Just do it, feed it to him, and tell him later.”
“Btw: Especially stews get better when heated up.”- CyclesSmiles
“NTA.”
“Tell him if he doesn’t want leftovers, he can make his own dinner.”- MistressJacklynHyde
“Yeah he is weird, it sounds more like he is trying to flex his authority and power over you.”
“I’ve never heard of anyone having problems with leftovers.”
“NTA.”
“Offer leftovers, I guess, and if he doesn’t like it, point to the kitchen.”
“But it sounds like he needs some therapy about healthy relationships if this is even a problem.”-Ergo_Meridian
“He gets to have opinions about the quantity and frequency of cooking meals when he’s the one doing it.”
“NTA.”
“For the record, OP’s husband, lots of people cook like that.”
“You can cook 21 meals a week individually if you don’t like leftovers.”
“If you’re privileged to be well fed off of someone else’s labor, the only correct response is ‘thank you’.”- SummitJunkie7
“Tell him to get f*cked.”
“I’d stop cooking for him at all.”
“A grown man can make his own food if he’s gonna whine about leftovers.”
“NTA.”- EnvironmentEntire201
“I’m sorry, but who DOESN’T eat leftovers?”
“It’s totally normal to cook a meal and eat leftovers.”
“Or even cook at the start of the week and portion out.”
“And no, that didn’t have anything to do with losing weight, it’s just waaaaaay more cost-effective and less time-consuming.”- GroundbreakingTop379
“’Then you get to starve. Leftovers won’t kill you. If that’s a problem, you can cook your own food.”
“NTA.”
“Stick to your guns and let him starve.”- Formal-Radish1413
“He has no idea what he’s talking about.”
“I’ve always eaten leftovers.”
“Almost everyone I know well eats them, and none of us are ‘diet’ people.”
“Eating leftovers is absolutely normal.”
“It’s practical and saves so much time!”
“It’s wild to me that you guys have survived this long without them.”
“If he’s not willing to eat them, he doesn’t really respect your time.”
“Like, is he gonna waste his time making a separate meal every day?”
“If he wants that, he should do it himself.”
“You’ve got better things to do.”- Better-Expert5105
“NTA.”
“Is your husband aware that 90% of restaurants use food that has been cooked and then reheated?”
“As in cooked and then frozen/refrigerated and then reheated before being served.”
“So unless he’s enjoying fine dining every night, chances are most or all of the restaurants he gets takeout from are serving him ‘leftovers’.”
“Tell him to get over himself or make his own food.”
“Most people don’t have the time or energy to cook fully fresh meals every single night.”-Kr_Treefrog2
“I purposely make larger meals so that I can freeze the leftovers.”
“And I batch cook meals. I like to cook, but not every day.”
“Your husband is rude.”
“And acting very entitled.”- Ladyooh
“Buy him a case of ramen.”
“If he doesn’t like what’s in the fridge, he can microwave himself a ‘fresh’ brick of noodles each night.”- Paddlehands84
“Money is tight + He isn’t making his meals = He doesn’t have the luxury of being a picky b*tch.”
“NTA.”- Specialist-Trip-6286
“Idk if this is relevant, but my dad refused to eat leftovers until this year because ‘having to eat leftovers means we’re poor’.”
“Much like my sister, ‘no lights on in the house means we’re poor’.”
“We all grew up in deep poverty with housing/meal insecurity, which brings about illogical but powerful beliefs.”
“When my siblings moved out, my mom said she wasn’t going to cook every night, and she started meal prepping.”
“My dad got sick of take-out and not having decent meals, so he started making his own meals; turns out he loves cooking and every time he says he’s excited to reheat it for lunch the next day because ‘it will taste better reheated’.”- Ladyharpie
“If my husband told me he didn’t want leftovers, I’d be like, fine, find yourself something to eat then cuz I’m not cooking for you anymore.”
“I don’t know who your husband thinks he is, but he needs to realize that food is super expensive and most of us eat leftovers because no one with half a brain wants to be throwing out food.”-Traditional-Ad2319
“NTA.”
“Leftovers are almost always better.”- Brefailslife420
“Sounds like he’s very spoiled!”
“Mama’s boy!!”- ArtisticSwan635
“Tell him to eat what you’re offering, or have some cereal.”
“If he’s acting like a kid, treat him like one!”
“Some food actually tastes better heated back up later.”- LindaNoKings
“My bf is the cook in the house, and he usually cooks 3-4 times a week.”
“The others are leftovers and almost without fail, things taste better the next day as all the seasoning comes together.”
“Does he seriously think most restaurants make all things brand new every day?”
“Nope, they put it in the fridge and reuse it the next day.”
“There is no room for that kind of food loss.”
“Yes, things like already-made hamburgers are tossed, but most times things like chicken already cooked are now next day’s chicken salad, chicken Caesar’s salad, or chicken soup.”
“So buying out is NOT a way to get away from leftovers.”
“He just doesn’t SEE them bring leftovers!”
“Ask him what his favorite lunchmeat and cereal are because now on you are cooking and using leftovers, and if he doesn’t like it, go fix yourself something to eat!”- lauraz0919
“NTA.”
“Sounds like it’s time for him to make himself some sandwiches.”- night_noche
If it didn’t take the physical toll it would on the OP, it could possibly be a good idea for the OP to do as her husband says, and cook fresh meals every day.
Because then he’ll have irrefutable evidence of how expensive it is.
Then, too, the fact that his logic that only people who want to lose weight cook for the week is just as illogical as anything else he said.
As would it really be a bad thing if they save money and lose weight?