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Dad Sparks Drama By Banning His Teen Son’s Girlfriend From Coming Over After Catching Them Getting It On In The Pool

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A father was at a loss for words when he walked in on his teenage son and the son’s girlfriend at home and not watching Netflix as he presumed.

Instead, Redditor Mall_Defiant caught them making more than just waves inside the pool.

Drama ensued when he established some ground rules, which made him consult the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit to ask:

“AITA for telling my 18-year-old he can’t have his girlfriend over after I caught them doing it in the pool?”

The Original Poster (OP) wrote:

“I work a lot and my younger sons are in summer camp. My oldest graduated from high school and wants to spend the summer hanging out with his friends and girlfriend until he starts college online.”

“He worked exceptionally hard to get into the school he got into so I am allowing him to do whatever instead of working or babysitting his younger brothers.”

“It was a rare day that I was able to come home early. I did see her girlfriend’s car in our driveway and assumed they were watching Netflix or something.”

“When I came in, I could see the patio door was open and heard splashing. I went out to say ‘hi’ and saw my son and his girlfriend going at it like a porn movie.”

“In fact, my son was recording it with his phone. He looked at me like he saw a ghost and all I said was ‘so this is what you do all day?’ I didn’t mean it as a joke or to be serious. It’s all that I could come up with.”

“I went into my home office and they argued for a minute and his girlfriend left.”

“My son confronted me later and told me that was not cool to creep up on them like that. I reminded him it was my house and what if his mother or brothers walked on him?”

“He said he wasn’t doing anything wrong and he wasn’t a little kid. He said I was being stupid and his sex life was none of my business.”

“So I told him since I had no idea if they were doing it on other places like the kitchen table or my bed, I couldn’t trust him so she wasn’t allowed over anymore.”

In an update, the OP added:

“To be honest, I like his girlfriend although I see her in a different light. She is a very nice girl.”

“I had a talk with my son and told him he should mask any shame or embarrassment with anger over my catching him with his girlfriend anymore than when I have caught him jerking off in middle school. It’s fine.”

“That being said, he needs to treat sex like he did jerking off in middle school which is discreetly. There is no need to discuss it further and I am willing to pretend it didn’t happen.”

“All he said was ‘fine’.”

“And his girlfriend was over today. I really thought about asking them if they were going to go swimming, but didn’t.”

Anonymous strangers on the internet were asked if and where guilt belongs by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
  • NAH – No A**holes Here

Redditors felt the issue was less the activity and more the location.

“NTA there’s a difference between don’t have sex and don’t have sex in communal areas.” – HumanDHF

EXACTLY. If OP were uncomfortable with them having sex at all, I’d think he was being ridiculous. But having sex in the public area of a house is different.” – IAmTheNightSoil

“Nah not ridiculous. Doesn’t matter how old you are if your parents say no sex in their house no sex in their house. That’s it.”

“It’s not a big deal wanna do it be an adult and pay for your own pace to do it.” – elizabethpar

“Not having sex in public areas in a house you share with your parents and younger sibling is not something that needs to be said. They could have easily kept to his room.”

“To top it off, the son’s (18!) attitude when he was caught is absurd. No apology. He thought the father was in the wrong?? Please. The ban was deserved for this (not the public sex).”

“He’s 18. He can get a job and work his way to funding his own place if he can’t have basic respect for his parents.” – pluckymonkeymoo

While Redditors agreed the father was NTA, a few suggested he consider a less harsh punishment.

“NTA. Not in the pool man. That’s disgusting. I know the chemicals technically clean the water, but still.”

“However, I’d consider a less harsh punishment. Her never being allowed over will either sabotage their relationship, or push him away.”

“Though, your reasoning is sound (how do you know any surface in the house is safe?), and I’m not sure what a good compromise would be.” – hellaripe

“Op. Sit down with your son, explain why you’re upset about them having sex in places that isn’t his bedroom.”

“Make sure they’re both using protection. Explain that you know your son is 18 and you understand sex is going to happen whether you ban the girlfriend or not.”

“Make the condition that the girlfriend is allowed back over as along as their activities are kept exclusively to his bedroom.”

“I would also recommend having a serious talk about the recording their exploits as well. After you yourself doing some research about revenge porn and taking a look at some horror stories.”

“The recording stuff could possibly end up getting your son in trouble if they break up and he refuses to delete the videos at her request, or worse, shares them around in spite.”

“I’m not saying that he will, but it’s a good idea to make your son aware of the possible consequences that can come with sex videos.”

“If he fails to to agree and keep to your terms, then I think you’re well within your rights to ban his girlfriend from the house.” – Wolfy5079

Overall, Redditors believed the son should have used his better judgment, especially while he was still living under the roof that his father provides.

Written by Koh Mochizuki

Koh Mochizuki is a Los Angeles based actor whose work has been spotted anywhere from Broadway stages to Saturday Night Live.
He received his B.A. in English literature and is fluent in Japanese.
In addition to being a neophyte photographer, he is a huge Disney aficionado and is determined to conquer all Disney parks in the world to publish a photographic chronicle one day. Mickey goals.
Instagram: kohster Twitter: @kohster1 Flickr: nyckmo