When exchanging gifts with others, it can sometimes be difficult to dial in exactly what kind of gift to buy.
Does the amount of money spent matter? Is homemade the better option? Perhaps an intangible experience is the most appropriate.
But bearing all those different options in mind, one thing is for certain: a gift usually is synonymous with thoughtfulness.
Recently, one couple encountered some serious difficulties in that area. And one of them explained the whole ordeal on the “Am I the A**hole (AITA)” subReddit.
The Original Poster (OP), who goes by Tzz98 on the site, clarified who he felt the culprit was with his title.
“AITA for being angry about a gift my gf gave me?”
He began by explaining the context around the gift giving.
“So some months ago my girlfriend and I had our 1 year anniversary, and of course we exchanged a gift. She hinted me that she would have loved a ring, nothing too crazy, and I got her a ring.”
“In addition to that a big frame with 12 picture in it, one picture from every month we’ve been together (yes I know it may sound lame lol).”
Then it came time for his girlfriend’s gift to her.
“I’m a sort of minimalist and I don’t really have anything I need so when she asked me if there was something I’d like I said whatever she wanted, it’s the thought that matters.
“She got me a little frame (bought for very very very cheap at the Chinese shop under her house) with four pictures and that’s it.”
“The gift idea was cute, I was expecting some more effort (the pictures were not even aligned, they appeared to be thrown in), I was sensing very little effort from her side to her gift.”
But OP exercised patience.
“Anyway, I didn’t want her to feel bad, also because I could be wrong and overreacting, so I didn’t say anything and thanked her instead.”
“All good until some days before Christmas, she has two close friends and she didn’t know what kind of gift to give them, I suggested a couple of ideas but she said it was a waste of money (around 10€, keep in mind she lives with her mom and gets 500€ from her dad every month).”
And then his girlfriend let some info slip.
“And then she said what got me a little angry: “I’ll do the thing I do when I don’t want to spend money and time on a gift, I’ll just buy two cheap frames at the Chinese shop, print a couple of photos and I don’t have to think about it anymore.”
“After a moment I expressed my perplexity about what she had just said, because it was the same thing she had done with my gift.”
“I got a little angry and she said I was overreacting, that it was not the same thing and that I shouldn’t think about it.”
“Now some time has past, I’m not angry, but I feel sad about the whole thing. Am I the a**hole for getting angry and sad about the whole situation?”
Anonymous strangers weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
Redditors echoed OP’s frustrated response, calling him “NTA” as they did so.