Pranks can be a great way to get a laugh, and for the most part, people love a good prank.
But the keyword here is “good.”
Where exactly is the line between prank and deception?
A dad-to-be on Reddit is furious that the latest of his wife’s many pranks was a lie about cheating and the possibility that their unborn child is not his, so he turned to the “Am I The A**hole Here” (AITAH) subReddit to seek feedback from fellow Redditors.
Redditor Beneficial-Ebb-5469 asked:
“AITAH For Being Furious With My Pregnant Wife Over a Prank?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“31M[ale]. I’ve been with my wife Lisa since college and she’s currently seven months pregnant with our first baby.”
“My wife Lisa is witty and likes to play jokes on me.”
“For example, she likes to pass of fake facts and stories as real and see if I’ll believe them.”
“Lisa was a theatre kid, and so she’s great at acting and selling these stories.”
“I used to fall for her pranks all the time since I’m gullible and she’s so convincing.”
“However, now that I’ve been with her for so many years, I can typically tell when she’s messing with me.”
“She’s upped the antics over the years, and so she can occasionally get me to believe one of her jokes.”
“Today when I got home from work, Lisa had tears in her eyes and told me she needed to talk to me about something.”
“I was seriously worried, and sat down with her immediately.”
“I asked what was wrong several times, and she kept saying it was hard to talk about and she was terrified I’d leave her. “
“I kept pressing, and she told me she had an affair with her boss several months ago and wasn’t sure if the baby was mine.”
“I asked if she was serious, and she said she was 100% serious and started crying even harder.”
“I got up, started pacing, and tried to gather my thoughts.”
“After a few minutes, Lisa bursted into laughter and said she was just joking.”
“I was furious.”
“I said it wasn’t funny in the slightest to make jokes about cheating and the child not being mine.”
“Lisa then said she was a bit offended that I believed that specific prank and not several others.”
“She said she couldn’t believe I actually thought she’d cheat on me.”
“She then got teary, and asked why I didn’t trust her.”
“I asked why I would trust her after she pulled that prank on me, managed to cry telling me about it, and continued with the prank even though I was viably upset.”
“Lisa said it was harmless, and I was blowing things way out of proportion.”
“She continued to ask why I didn’t trust her, and I told her I needed some space.”
“I ended up going to a speak easy and have been away from the house ever since, even though Lisa has called several times.”
“I know it was a prank, but I think this joke went way too far, especially with the tears.”
“I also was clearly upset (as anyone would be), and she should have stopped it as soon as she realized I was actually falling for it.”
“Usually Lisa’s jokes are funny, but this one really got to me for some reason.”
“AITAH and am I overreacting?”
“I feel badly because she’s very pregnant with my child and I don’t want to stress her out, but I need space right now.”
Redditors weighed in and decided OP was not the a**hole (NTA).
“NTA. Send her fake divorce papers and let her see how funny it is for her.” – Equivalent-Bee6501
“NTA: The worst part about this to me isn’t even the prank.”
“It’s after the prank she see you are upset and instead of apologizing she blames you for believing her and begin to question you.”
“Also just remember she can make herself cry, so don’t let tears fool you anymore” – Apart-Scene-9059
“I think you need to tell her you need a paternity test.”
“NTA.” – Sea_Firefighter_4598
“First of all, if she is stressed over you keeping your distance, too f**king bad.”
“This is her fault, if she hadn’t acted like a moronic child with her stupid “prank” there would be no stress to be had.”
“Secondly; that is not a prank, that is cruelty.”
“Literally nothing funny about it.”
“Thirdly; she is avoiding owning up to her f**k up by asking why you don’t trust her.”
“Don’t let her deflect your justified anger with her crocodile tears.”
“She is not the victim; she is manipulating you.”
“NTA” – Remruna
“NTA”
“The reason cheating ends relationships is for the same reason lying does – it breaks the trust in the relationship.”
“She may not have a pattern of cheating, but she does have a long pattern of lying, and that’s why you didn’t trust her enough to immediately reject the idea she cheated on you.”
“She’s the one who has deliberately eroded the trust in your relationship, for laughs, over the years.”
“Of course you don’t trust her.”
“She’s made an effort to convince you not to trust her.”
“How do you even know which part she’s lying about this time?”
“Maybe it was just a prank. Or maybe she really did cheat, but then she pretended it was a prank when she started to doubt that you would forgive her.”
“At this point, I think you might want to consider couples counseling to see if it’s possible to rebuild the trust between you.”
“You can’t have a stable relationship without trust, and it’s clear that you justifiably don’t trust her enough for a stable relationship.” – Pandoratastic
“NTA. That’s not a joke, it’s a warning.” – KooLow81
“NTA”
“That is not a harmless prank or joke, and she knows this.”
“Do not let her act like this is your fault.” – star_b_nettor
“NTA.”
“You and your wife need to have a very thorough discussion about putting some clear boundaries around this pranking business. And soon.”
“Because if she’s willing to do this, trust me, it might cross her mind in the moment to pull some stunt…. about your future baby.”
“(Jesus I don’t even want to think about that).”
“Please show her this post and update us.” – busyshrew
“If this is real, yall need therapy.”
“There’s nothing even remotely funny about a spouse who continuously shows their significant other they can’t trust the words coming out of their mouth.”
“Let alone bringing your unborn child into it, what’s next? ‘I lost the baby……….JUST KIDDING! MY GOD TAKE A JOKE!'”
“ffs your wife sounds horrible and needs to grow up.”
“NTA but definitely a doormat for way too long” – Delicious-Editor-993
“NTA. She crossed a line here.”
“I would tell her you want a paternity test.”
“Whether you go thru with it or not isn’t as important as you letting her know this was not acceptable.”
“My husband used to call me frequently and say he got hurt.”
“I would believe him, and then he would laugh and say he was just kidding.”
“He called me at work one morning and said he fell and broke his foot.”
“I told him I was busy, but I would take him to urgent care that afternoon and that I had to go.”
“Well, he wasn’t kidding that time, but he did end up waiting till I came home for lunch before I realized he was actually hurt.”
“He learned a hard lesson that day, and it’s time for your wife to learn hers.” – themistycrystal
“Was it a prank? Or was it the truth, and she decided to back peddle and pretend it was a joke?”
“This isn’t a joking matter, and now she is gaslighting you with the whole ‘how could you believe it?'”
“NTA”
“Honestly I think you under-reacted” – trev4_a86
“NTA. Pranks are meant to be light-hearted and fun, not emotionally scarring or devastating.”
“The topic of infidelity, especially involving the paternity of a child, is far too sensitive to be joke material, particularly with the hormones and stress of a pregnancy in the mix.”
“It’s understandable you needed space after such an intense situation.”
“While it’s great that your wife has a sense of humor, maybe it’s time for a serious chat about boundaries in jokes going forward.” – yorgun_0073
“NTA”
“Sorry but jokes are meant to be funny and this if a joke was just cruel.”
“Messing around with your unborn child’s paternity then gaslighting you for believe she wouldn’t stoop that low to joke about it is a serious red flag 🚩”
“Whether you admit it to yourself or not, you will always have a doubt in the back of your mind about the baby’s paternity, so I would demand a DNA test to alleviate your doubts, and if the wife is upset, remind her she created this situation by trying to be funny!”
“She crossed so many boundaries and really needs to grow up and stop with her ‘hysterically funny pranks'” – tigerz0973
“I’m currently 8 months pregnant and would NEVER joke about something like this.”
“There’s a line where jokes can become hurtful.”
“This is one of those times. NTA” – Majestic_Scarcity540
“This is horrific. What she did was cruel.”
“I don’t know how I’d come back from it, my loved one treating me so cruelly.”
“NTA.” – derfel_cadern
According to his fellow Redditors, OP’s reaction was justified.
Hopefully, he will find comfort in their words as he decides on his next steps.