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Mom Flips Out On Teacher After She Told Her Overwhelmed Daughter ‘Well, Life Isn’t Fair’

A teacher holding a pile of papers.
Westend61/Getty Images

The new arrangements for public education during the pandemic is creating stress for all parties involved.

Given the increased pressures placed on parents, teachers and students should additional leeway be given?

One parent is wondering if they went too far in their response to their child’s teacher. They turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for feedback.

Redditor anon291throw asked:

“AITA for flipping out on my daughters teacher after she made the comment ‘Well, life isnt fair’ in response to my daughter saying she was overwhelmed?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“So, my daughter(8) goes to a school system that just recently jumped on board with remote learning. As in we literally just got tablets set up through the school last Friday.”

“Prior to this my daughter was going to school twice a week and was NEVER sent home with any sort of school/homework.

“Instead of easing their way in to the remote learning like most schools have done, they decided to slam my daughter with 137 assignments the same day that the students were given the tablets. I’m sure you can see my frustration.”

“On top of this, the assignments are due today. All 137 of them.”

“Not to mention the SIX mandatory Zoom meetings throughout the day, which leaves very little time to do the actual assignments. AND you cant access the assignments past 4pm OR on the weekends.”

“My daughter and I have been working our a**es off. Literally from 5am (my daughter is an early bird) until 4pm in the evening we are on that damned tablet trying to complete these assignments.”

“Which literally leaves my 9-year-old (my other child) with no help on his homework, at all.”

“This morning during a mandatory meeting my daughter’s teacher asked how everyone was doing. Her teacher is one of those teachers who should have retired 20 years ago and is an a** to all of the students and cuts them off midsentence every single time they speak.”

“So when it came time for my daughter to answer, my daughter said ‘I’m feeling really overwhelmed’ and her teacher said ‘Well, life isnt fair, is it?’ And then went to move on to another student.”

“Before she did I said ‘Excuse me??’ and popped my head into view of the camera. Her teacher instantly started saying ‘That came out worse than intended!'”

“My response was ‘Yeah, I think not actually. I will be in contact with the school since you feel it’s necessary to instantly shoot down students that you are supposed to be helping’. I then logged my daughter off of her meeting and called the school.”

“My husband said I’m being a Karen and that the teacher is probably just overwhelmed. I told him that I truly dont give a sh*t if she is overwhelmed.”

“She chose this career and it’s hard on everyone currently but that gives her no right to be a raging bitch to students who were just slapped with 137 assignments, whom barely even know how to work the school’s pages because there was NO training or overview.”

“AITA?”

The OP added:

“Proof just so everyone knows… my daughter originally had 137 assignments. This morning she had 46 left to do, after busting her a** all week to complete them.”

“The assignments just went back up to 101 like a half hour after I posted this. So, the picture I linked now has 99 assignments to complete.”

anon291throw/Reddit

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided the OP was declared not the a**hole.

“Oh hell to the f’k no. I work in retail, face to face with customers losing their maskless sh*t at me on the daily and I’m expected to take it and respond calmly for a wage that barely covers living expenses.”

“This is a teacher at a private school dealing with kids over a computer who can’t respond in a calm manner to a child telling her ‘I’m feeling overwhelmed’—who only reacted with any sort of embarrassment when she realised that the parent heard her.”

“NTA. I’d be contacting the school, and possibly the school board, depending on how the school handles things—not only for how the teacher reacted to the child, but also because 137 assignments is absolutely absurd.” ~ CountingTheRavens

“NTA. But also…she’s 8 right? So wtf are they gonna do if y’all just don’t do all 137 assignments? It’s not gonna show up on her HS transcripts, so who cares?” ~ katmck14

The OP responded:

“So, in the very beginning of the school year her teacher made it clear to us that all incomplete assignments take 120 points off of her final grade.”

“If my daughter does not finish these assignments by 4pm this evening (she still has 46 to do) she will be held back. All due to the negligence of the school system.”

Redditors felt the workload was excessive for an 8-year-old.

“Ohhhh WOW. In that case, maybe round up some other angry parents and go after whoever tf thought 137 assignments for an 8 year old was okay. That is all kinds of f’ked up.”

“I would be in contact with the school over the 137 assignments in a week.”

“As for the comment itself, I’m at like 75% NTA and 25% NAH. The teacher probably is overwhelmed, but that doesn’t give her the right to make snippy comments.”

“No rational teacher would make all those due in a week. That’s beyond unfair.” ~ SensitiveBugGirl

“That’s nearly 70 hours of homework in a week—most adults don’t even pull those kinds of hours at work.”

“NTA, get in touch with the other parents about this.” ~ TorggaFrostbeard

“I work full-time and do graduate school part time and I don’t have that much work in a week.

“Absurd. That person shouldn’t be a teacher.” ~ Coolbeans224

“Not even homework, this is their normal school work.”

“She said they are not even able to access these assignments after 4pm or on the weekend.”

“That is insane!” ~ msbelle13

“Work it backwards. 137 assignments per week. 5 days in a week. Otherwise that’s 27.4 assignments per day.”

“Let’s say the student goes to school for 8 hours a day 7-4pm (8 hours plus lunch). Assuming no meetings that’s 3.4 assignments per hour or 17 minutes per assignment.”

“I would run the same calculation in front of the principal AFTER subtracting the amount of time for required meetings. Let’s say for fun the six mandatory meetings are 20 mins each or a total of 2 hours.”

“That changes the above calculations to:  4.56 assignments per hour or 13 minutes per assignment. Keep in mind this means zero breaks for 4 hours.”

“I would go into the meeting with the principal with those numbers and then hand him an assignment and tell him to do the work in under 13 minutes and get no breaks all day. Then ask who he’s going to send to help the second kiddo with their work.” ~ TheHiddenMessenger

While times are stressful for everyone, parents still need to put their child’s well-being before the feelings of any adult who works with them.

Written by Amelia Mavis Christnot

Amelia Christnot is an Oglala Lakota, Kanien'kehá:ka Haudenosaunee and Metís Navy brat who settled in the wilds of Northern Maine. A member of the Indigenous Journalists Association, she considers herself another proud Maineiac.