Graduations are a special time for young students.
It’s a major life milestone.
And when one is graduating with honors or at the top of their class, people tend to want all of their loved ones there for support.
This is why it can be hurtful when some loved ones decide to make alternate plans.
Those types of memories last forever.
Redditor No_Cut207 wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback. So naturally, she came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
She asked:
“AITA for giving away my dad and my sister’s tickets to my graduation ceremony and telling them to not bother showing up?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“I (18 F[emale]) have my high school graduation ceremony this Wednesday.”
“It was sent to my parents in an email that I would be giving a speech that day as my grades made me valedictorian of my school’s class of 2024, and I was excited to do so.”
“My school made us reserve and buy tickets to the ceremony weeks in advance, and I picked mine up on the 26th.”
“The problem started at dinner when I told my family I picked up the tickets for my graduation day and would keep them with me until the day of just to make sure they don’t get lost.”
“My dad told me that he and my sister had plans for an hour before the ceremony, but that my mom would be there the whole time, and that they’d try to be there for the after party.”
“I was honestly shocked for a moment, before starting to laugh, assuming they weren’t serious.”
“When I realized they actually weren’t joking, I’ll admit I was a bit mad.”
“I’m usually a very shy and non-confrontational person, even around my family, but I started yelling at my dad and sister, asking if they were seriously ditching my graduation ceremony.”
“I told them that the after-party was useless to attend and that all the pictures of the graduates with their families would be taken at least 2 hours before the ceremony.”
“They said it’s fine and we can take our own pictures the day after my graduation, but I got up and left dinner.”
“Over the weekend, I saw a few people on my class group chat complain that they didn’t get enough tickets, so I offered up the two tickets I had and met up with a girl from my class to give them to her.”
“And even though I told her not to, she actually paid me the original price for them.”
“When my dad brought up the topic of graduation today during lunch, I told him that I gave the other two tickets away, and only my mom will be attending, so they shouldn’t bother with the afterparty.”
“He got mad and asked why I would do that, to which I replied that I don’t see the point in wasting money on tickets if they’re not going to use them.”
“My dad blew up on me, saying I’m acting like a spoiled brat, and it’s not like I’ll die if he and my sister are a bit late to my graduation.”
“I spoke to a few people about it, my friends and my grandma.”
“My friends said good riddance, and if they consider their plans more important, they can have fun.”
“But my grandma said that while she understands my side, I shouldn’t have given away the tickets just to spite my dad because maybe he would have changed his mind and gone on time.”
“My dad and sister plan to have a sleepover with her and her friend group in the north, about a two-hour drive from where we live.”
“The parents didn’t want to leave a bunch of under-16-year-old girls alone that far, so everyone’s parents were also going for supervision (apart from my mom, who is going to be at my graduation).”
“So I’m looking for a non-biased opinion.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“So AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“Thank God your Mom supports you… not only graduation 👩🎓 but also being the Valedictorian of your class!!! Great Job!!!!!👏🏼 👏🏼👍🏻”
“I am saddened that your Father and Sister are not celebrating your great accomplishments with you!”
“It just baffles me. I don’t even know you, but I’m excited for you.”
“You did the right thing!”
“NTA. But your Dad and Sister are TA.”
“They have/had 364 days to do their sleepover. Like WTF.”
“By the way Congrats on your accomplishments!” ~ Trick_Parsley_3077
“Well done, OP 😁!!”
“NTA of course.”
“As others have said, you probably could’ve talked them around, and if your goal was for them to attend, some patience would have probably achieved that.”
“But that’s not the point, and I think the others are missing that.”
“The goal is for them to want to turn up to such a major achievement without being begged or talked around.”
“You’ve made it clear that they’ve disappointed you, and that’s the only reason they are mad. Guilt.”
“Do not be gaslit. Do not be gaslit.”
“They didn’t care enough, and you shouldn’t ever need to talk them into caring.”
“They’ll hopefully learn from this, and it’d be nice to give them the chance to learn.” ~ Hot_dog_jumping_frog
“NTA. Whatever your dad and sister have planned is more important to them than you and your achievements are.”
“This is a good lesson for you to learn so early in life.”
“You don’t need to worry about people who don’t prioritize you.”
“I personally wouldn’t feel bad about what you did.”
“They’ll try to be there, like it’s some huge burden to see you, the valedictorian, give a speech and graduate.” ~ Vandreeson
“My father called me last year, crying, because he was sorry he didn’t attend my college graduation because he had to work.”
“I’m 55 and my graduation was in 1992.”
“Your father will regret this decision forever. NTA.” ~ richvide0
“I hope you are right, but your dad at least had a somewhat valid excuse.”
“OP’s father does NOT.”
“He’s choosing to miss it for something really stupid, which to me means he doesn’t give a dam.”
“OP’s sister must be his Golden Child.”
“So I doubt he’ll ever feel remorse.”
“OP, you are NTA.” ~ 2K9Dare
“Good! He should be.”
“His entire attitude toward your milestone is just gross.”
“What kind of father would be so flippant about their child graduating?”
“As the valedictorian, no less!”
“He sounded like he was talking about a kegger he wasn’t particularly interested in attending.”
“’Oh, yeah. I might swing by for the after-party.'”
“Then he had the audacity to get angry with you after you gave away their tickets!”
“He had zero intention of showing up, OP.”
“He would’ve come up with some excuse about being tired after chaperoning your sister or something.”
“You did the right thing by selling their tickets.”
“Also, your sister definitely planned her little party to coincide with your graduation.”
“Or as close to it as she could get without technically being at the same time.”
“That doesn’t excuse your dad, though.”
“He knew when your graduation was way in advance.”
“He just didn’t care, which is entirely on him.”
“Your mom’s awesomeness outweighs his sucky-ness, though, so yay, Mom!”
“NTA at all.”
“Also: Congratulations! We’re proud of you and wish you the very best, OP. 🎓” ~ MonOubliette
“NTA. You’re learning young that people are who they are, and you should treat them accordingly.”
“You’re the valedictorian, and they actually said they had plans before your graduation, leading you to believe they didn’t think it was important enough for them to attend.”
“And then you gave the tickets away.”
“And THEY are upset?”
“They are so wrong. Just wrong.”
“Congratulations on your achievement.”
“I hope you do just as well in college.”
“And I hope they have learned their lesson and will be present for the next graduation ceremony.” ~ Deep_Advertising_171
“First of all congratulations 🎉🎉 on passing and being Validictorian.”
“Also of your dad and sister planned a sleepover trip to the north how would they be able to get back in time for your after-party??”
“They would never make it in time.”
“So NTA, but your father and sister, are I take it graduation was a known date?”
“So they actively planned this trip knowing when the graduation would be.”
“NTA, your father and sister certainly are, though!” ~ Weary-Gift7735
“Congratulations on being made valedictorian.” ~ ContentContact3254
OP came back with an update…
“Hey everyone! First of all, I want to thank you for the interaction my original post got, which I ended up showing to my mom.”
“We had a laugh together at some of the comments about my dad, and she wanted me to tell you she appreciated the kind words about her as well.”
“My graduation was today, so here is an update to my original post a couple of days ago.”
“Although it was just my mom and I, the day went really well.”
“We took probably a hundred photos together, both with the school photographer and on my mom’s camera.”
“The girl I gave the tickets to, as well as her family, even took photos with my mom and me.”
“I gave my speech in front of the families of maybe 100+ students (my school has 3 different programs so lots of people), and was even surprised with certificates of excellence in psychology and IT when the time came for me to get my diploma.”
“As for my dad and sister, my sister has been spamming her social media with videos of the sleepover with her friends, to which I’m honestly unbothered.”
“My friends and I ended up ditching the after-party anyways and went for dinner in the city with our parents instead.”
“Overall, while I’m disappointed my entire family wasn’t there, I’m more than happy with it just being my mom and me.”
“And I honestly feel like I had more fun with her alone than I would have had if the rest of my family showed up.”
Well, OP, Reddit was with you all the way.
Your Dad and sister’s actions are sad, for them mostly.
It’s great to hear that your day was wonderful.
Congratulations on all of your success.
And good luck with your future endeavors.