We all like to have a good time, but some of us understand more than others that there’s a time and a place for having fun.
When someone’s trying to get over being sick, it’s probably not the time, pointed out the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit.
Redditor Apprehensive_Hair512 was frustrated with their husband when he repeatedly played with their dog and made a lot of noise, making it difficult for their sick daughter to get any rest.
Fed up with it, the Original Poster (OP) sent their dog back to work with their husband, who was furious at the idea.
They asked the sub:
“AITA for ‘forcing’ my husband to bring his dog to work with him today?”
The OP was utterly exhausted.
“My husband comes home every day at 11:15 during his lunch break to eat. His work is only 5 minutes away.”
“It’s important to note that he is allowed to bring his dog to work with him and has done so a handful of times prior to this incident.”
“For the past 3 days, I have been getting very little sleep. I have a sick child at home and I’ve been working 12-hour shifts due to short staffing issues.”
“So I get home at 3 AM and have basically been up all night catering to my child (when she is sick, she only wants me, not daddy; so he tries to help but it doesn’t go over well, and she is 2).”
“Over the past 3 days, I have maybe gotten a total of 10 hours of sleep.”
The OP’s daughter was trying to rest while sick.
“So today I have off, and my little one is feeling better, but she is still cranky and tired herself.”
“She went down for a nap at 10:30 this morning.”
“My husband gets home to eat at 11:15ish and for whatever reason, decided it would be a great idea to get the dog going. Tossing the dog around (literally), saying ‘Where’s your toy’ in a baby voice (which sets the dog off in a full-blown playful mood every single time), or saying, ‘Get momma, where’s momma.'”
“He knew our daughter was sleeping.”
“The dog is a heeler. Extremely energetic breed and when she gets going, she flies through this house like a maniac, knocking stuff over and being loud.”
“She woke up our daughter.”
The OP was absolutely furious.
“Now maybe it’s because of my lack of sleep but this set me right off.”
“Once this dog gets going, she doesn’t stop for at least an hour. So there was absolutely no chance of our daughter getting back to sleep or me taking a nap with her, as I had planned to do, providing the dog was in the house.”
“So I told him, ‘Since you decided to be selfish and get the dog going, knowing me and our daughter were f**king exhausted, you can take her with you (to work).'”
The OP’s husband tried to refuse.
“He started saying some excuse of, ‘I didn’t know she was going to start acting like that’ (bulls**t, she does this EVERY time) and said he had a bunch to do today and didn’t want to watch the dog too.”
“I told him it wasn’t my problem. He took the dog and left, p**sed off.”
“He then proceeded to text me and say that he ‘can’t get s**t done now’ and that I should have just stuck the dog in the kennel while we napped (she howls when she is in there when she is energetic so, no).”
“He said it’s my fault he isn’t going to get anything done. I ignored it.”
“AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some thought the husband needed to be more considerate, especially with a sick child.
“NTA. He knows how the dog behaves and decided to rile her up knowing his daughter is sick and you were exhausted.” – bendytoepilot
“Okay, yeah, some dogs just play rough.”
“The crate comment is gross, though. It sounds like he has no respect for the dog as a living, breathing creature if he thinks the dog can just be shoved into a crate and out of the way when she’s inconvenient.” – fix-me-in-45
“NTA, OP. My dog is half heeler and is a ball of energy. When he gets going and wants to play, he doesn’t take no for an answer!”
“When we go for walks or runs, he doesn’t start to get tired until the 3rd mile. I love him to pieces but man, sometimes I wish he’d cosplay that’s he’s a lazy lapdog.” – saurons-cataract
“My dad had a habit of doing the same thing to my pooch 8 years ago when he was a pup, sans the throwing up in the air part, now my dad is 87 yr old parchment skinned man and the pooch is a 120 lb Shiloh shepherd. Thank god he respects the shit out of his 77 yr old grandma or I wouldn’t be able to keep him at my parents’!” – GlassWeird
“How do you handle a full-time job while raising two toddlers and an energetic dog? NTA.” – type1error
“Does he think everyone is having a good day or does he want everyone to be having a good day? Like, does he get upset if you try to maintain your boundaries about not wanting to participate in something because of your mood?”
“Honestly he should’ve had to provide childcare for your daughter too because waking up a two-year-old early from a nap is no joke and you need the sleep just as much as she does.”
“Does he not realize that you deserve sleep just as much as he does and he is lucky as hell right now for not being as sleep-deprived as the two of you, and having a cushy job 5 min away he can take his dog to while you work 12-hour shifts and are on baby duty 24/7?” – stormtatsu
“He’s not oblivious. He just doesn’t take you seriously. You are telling him how his actions affect you and everyone else. The only possible reasons he doesn’t understand/take it into consideration would be 1) he doesn’t believe you or 2) he doesn’t care. Or both.” – thehobbyqueer
Others honestly thought the husband kind of deserved it.
“We have a ‘you wake it, you take it’ motto in my house for people who are loud when the baby is sleeping. NTA op, I think you actually showed great restraint. I probably would have made him take the kid too.” – whydoineedaname86
“NTA. I can’t say the same for your husband. He is definitely TA and his problem that he can’t get work done. I’d tell him via text that it sounds like a personal problem.” – anaisaknits
“He throws a heeler in the air? I assume this is a puppy or a heeler on the smaller side? Mine are too bulky to fly LOL Your husband needs to train the dog to have an off switch. It takes persistence and determination, but it can be done. They are smart dogs and learn fast.”
“And NTA, they are all business and when they go. They go.” – Front_Basket6569
“Your husband definitely needed to face his own consequences but the way he handled this makes him sound like a (potentially aloof ) a**hole is his normal thing, and ‘just the a**hole this time’ is less likely.”
“He should never rile up the dog and then leave you to deal with that for the next hour, especially when you’re sleep-deprived and your kid is sleep deprived…. F**kin duh…” – natidiscgirl
“NTA. He knew what he was doing was going to get the dog going. It goes to show how unaware of how much you and your daughter have been struggling these past few days. You’re exhausted and you finally got a small victory by getting her down for a nap.”
“This is just speculation, but does he split care when he is home from work? Why didn’t he offer to help so you could take a power nap before his lunch break? Of course, he could have had a brain fart but I’m not so sure.” – InLovingMemoryCin
“If it were just him not realizing, then he would have been profusely apologetic once he realized and would not have complained about how the dog impacted his workday. He hadn’t cared how his riling up the dog had affected your workday or your daughter’s recovery, and he didn’t care how the dog would feel if it had been put in the kennel after being riled up by your husband.”
“Sorry. Your husband really doesn’t care enough about the rest of you and how is actions impact any of you.” – swillshop
“NTA. Husband f**ked around and found out.”
“For real though, even if the dog wasn’t behaving like a maniac at your husband’s urging, if it’s extra responsibility for you while you’re trying to deal with a sick child, it should not be a problem for your husband to take the dog to work with him to help ease that burden for a few days. Teamwork makes the dream work and all that.” – Significant-Ad-9758
The subReddit was furious on the tired OP’s behalf, especially with also having a sick child at home. Playing with the dog is normal, but there’s a time and a place for it, and during naptime definitely isn’t it.