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Bride Epically Calls Out ‘Selfish’ Sister Who Tie-Dyed Her Wedding Dress Without Her Permission

Woman tie-dyeing a dress
Lea Scaddan/Getty Images

Sometimes it’s really hard to imagine what could possibly be going through someone else’s mind, especially when it leads to something being broken or plans being changed.

It feels impossible to come up with an explanation, unless they meant harm, considered the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITAH) subReddit.

Redditor Whole_Challenge_9099 spent a lot of time customizing the perfect wedding dress and even asked her mother to store it at her home for safekeeping.

But when the future bride realized that her sister had accessed the dress and ruined it to make it more “unique,” the Original Poster (OP) couldn’t imagine that her sister did this out of the kindness of her heart.

She asked the sub:

“AITAH for telling my sister I hope her husband cheats on her after she ruined my wedding dress?”

The OP spent a lot of time picking out and customizing the perfect wedding dress.

“I (29 Female) have been engaged for about a year, and I’m getting married in three months.”

“Like many brides, my wedding dress is a big deal to me. I spent months picking it out, and it cost more than I care to admit.”

“It’s a gorgeous custom-made gown that I was keeping at my mom’s house because I wanted to avoid any ‘accidents’ at home (I have a dog that sheds like crazy).”

Then the OP’s sister did something terrible to “improve” the dress.

“My sister (34 Female) recently had some sort of ‘life-changing epiphany’ and decided she’s done with fast fashion and wants to live a more ‘eco-conscious’ lifestyle. Cool, right?”

“Except she’s taken it to a weird level, constantly shaming me and others about our choices, like buying new clothes instead of thrifted.”

“She’s also become super into DIY projects, most of which end up looking like a Pinterest fail, but whatever, I wasn’t going to say anything.”

“Fast forward to last weekend, I stopped by my mom’s house to check on the dress and make sure everything was fine. When I opened the garment bag, my heart legit stopped.”

“My sister, in all her DIY glory, had dyed my wedding dress.”

“Apparently, she thought the white was too ‘traditional and boring’ and decided to ‘upcycle’ it by dip-dyeing the bottom half in this hideous tie-dye rainbow pattern. HER WORDS: ‘I made it more fun and unique! You’ll stand out!’

The OP was devastated, to say the least.

“I. LOST. IT.”

“I screamed at her, and she just stood there, acting like I was being overdramatic. She kept saying she was ‘just trying to help’ and that ‘it’s just a dress.'”

“I told her she was a selfish psycho and to never speak to me again.”

“Then, and this is where I might be the a**hole, I said, ‘I hope your husband gets so sick of your controlling, self-righteous bulls**t that he cheats on you.'”

“She started crying and called me a bunch of names, saying I crossed the line.”

Even the OP’s family lashed out at the OP for what she’d said.

“Now my mom is mad at me, saying my sister was ‘only trying to do something nice’ and that I didn’t need to take it ‘that far.'”

“She’s insisting I apologize for the cheating comment, but I feel like I was justified in saying it.”

“My fiancé thinks my sister is nuts, but even he raised an eyebrow at that last comment and said I might have gone too far.”

“AITAH for saying what I said, or is my sister just the worst?”

Fellow Redditors weighed in:

  • NTA: Not the A**hole
  • YTA: You’re the A**hole
  • ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
  • NAH: No A**holes Here

Some encouraged the OP to get her money back for the dress, even if it meant suing. 

“Please sue her for the dress!” – Cguy203

“NTA. That dress costs a lot.”

“She damaged/vandalized it. Sue her a**. NTA.” – Fanwhip

“Go after her for the cost of the new dress, as it will probably be a rush order due to time constraints. The actual damages will thus quite likely end up exceeding the cost of the damaged dress.” – Corodix

“Wouldn’t it have to have a personal item clause (or whatever, I don’t know my legalese)? Or is that only a thing for the lowly folks that rent.”

“Whatever the terminology, would the protection of the home automatically come into effect no matter what you brought into it? My insurance wanted to know why I had so many laptops…”

“I swear I was in school for it! I had to disclose and prove the value of anything over a couple of hundred bucks I wanted to be protected.” – Snoo_70531

“Mom’s homeowner’s insurance might actually cover this if OP presses charges. Time to find out. Then the insurance can go after the sister.” – maroongrad

“Your sister did something that is unfathomable. She wilfully destroyed your wedding dress. So you lashed out. Probably not the best choice of words, but in the heat of the moment you wanted to hurt her just as she hurt you.”

“The thought process she went through to come up with to dye your dress is… well… mind-boggling.”

“I mean, who the h**l would do something like that? I’d insist your sister have your dress replaced, because I doubt it’s fixable. Tell her in no uncertain terms that what she did is inexcusable and you will be going low-contact for the foreseeable future, due to her actions.”

“Explain to your mom that trying to excuse your sister’s unhinged behavior will only distance her from you.”

“I hope you get your sister to compensate you for your dress.” – Ratchet_gurl24

Others were critical of the mother for not stopping the OP’s sister from doing this.

“Mom must have colluded on this? How could she dye the dress without her knowing?” – Bogpot

“I mean, the mom was given the task of keeping the dress safe and she either neglected her obligation, or OP’s sister did it when she wasn’t around.”

“Either way, OP is absolutely NTA! But both mom and sister are! Mom for asking OP to apologize and the sister for being the absolute trash b***h that she is.”

“I hope OP uninvited them both from the wedding and presses charges against her sister for willfully destroying her wedding dress.” – Metisbeader

“If she took it out of the house, her mother should have known. And if someone wants to use my washer to dye something, they’d d**n sure better talk to me about it.”

“I’m curious about OP’s mother. Her dress should have been safe with her. Surely she knew what the sister was doing. She doesn’t seem like the kind of person who would do something quietly.” – OutlandishnessFew981

“I can’t believe her mom let her sister ruin her dress. Like she just stood by and let that psycho destroy OP’s dress and think there isn’t an issue?” – Angelbearsmom

“The sister sounds like a handful, and maybe the mom went along with it just to keep the sister happy because she was gonna fly off her rocker or something.”

“OP is still NTA even though her comment was so out of pocket… but it was in the heat of anger and the fact that something that she needed, and prepared ahead of time, and paid for, is irretrievably ruined and on short notice right before the wedding.” – probably_nontoxic

Some encouraged the OP to disinvite them from the wedding and maybe go no-contact.

“This is absolutely unbelievable. What on earth was the sister thinking?? Dyeing someone else’s WEDDING dress without permission! I think I would have done something very physical to that b***h! And the mother acting like it was no big deal…”

“Make sure both your mom and your sister are uninvited to your wedding. And uninvite any and all their flying monkeys.” – MyCat_SaysThis

“How could she possibly dye and dry and re-package a wedding dress without anyone knowing? Does your mom live in a soundproof room? I think mom knew about it or found out about it prior to your visit and is downplaying it to take the heat off of herself for allowing it.”

“Uninvited both of them… from your life!” – hokeypokey59

“NTA. Ex sister. And your mom? No contact no invite.” – shammy_dammy

“I can see two people who are not coming to your wedding. I guess your sister is the golden child. Take your mum’s favorite dress dip dye it, too.” – CakePhool

“Post publicly the amount you paid, and add 20%, because you’re not going to get that dress made again in three months. Show before and after pictures.”

“Go no-contact on everyone who thinks your sister did the right thing or who thinks you shouldn’t have yelled at your sister. I’d take it a step further and uninvite these people. Good luck. I’m very sorry this happened to you.” – Wiener_Dawgz

After receiving feedback, the OP shared her thoughts on what her sister did.

“Thank you to everyone who spoke up. I’m glad someone sees how insane this whole thing is.”

“Like, how does someone think it’s okay to mess with a wedding dress without asking?”

“I get the comment was harsh, but honestly, at the moment, I wanted her to feel even a fraction of the pain I felt when I saw what she did.”

“She absolutely needs to learn that her ‘helpful’ ideas aren’t always welcome, especially when it comes to something as important as this!”

The OP debated how she’d respond next to her sister, including possibly suing her for damages.

“For those recommending that I sue my sister and maybe even my mom, I’ve thought about it, trust me!”

“But the whole idea of taking my own sister to court just feels… messy, you know?”

“Our family is already full of drama, and this would definitely make things worse.”

“That being said, if she doesn’t offer to pay for the damage soon, I might just go there. This dress wasn’t cheap, and her ‘help’ cost me a fortune. At this point, with all the drama she’s already caused, I wouldn’t feel guilty about it at all.”

The OP was also considering going no-contact with her sister and mom after what happened.

“As for going no-contact with my mom and sister, honestly, I’m considering it.”

“My sister clearly has zero respect for boundaries, and the fact that my mom is defending her like this is unbelievable.”

“I’ve been trying to keep the peace, but at this point, I’m seriously thinking about going no contact with both of them. There’s no way I’m letting either of them ruin my wedding day after this disaster.”

The subReddit couldn’t stop shaking their heads over what the OP’s sister had done, and they couldn’t imagine what she had been thinking if it wasn’t premeditated sabotage.

Even though the OP’s sister was already married, she seemed really resistant to the idea of the OP getting married and having the spotlight on her.

Otherwise, why would she purposefully ruin the exact thing the bride was supposed to wear?

Written by McKenzie Lynn Tozan

McKenzie Lynn Tozan has been a part of the George Takei family since 2019 when she wrote some of her favorite early pieces: Sesame Street introducing its first character who lived in foster care and Bruce Willis delivering a not-so-Die-Hard opening pitch at a Phillies game. She's gone on to write nearly 3,000 viral and trending stories for George Takei, Comic Sands, Percolately, and ÜberFacts. With an unstoppable love for the written word, she's also an avid reader, poet, and indie novelist.