Choosing to have a specific diet is a personal decision. But, that does not give you the right to force your ideas unto someone else.
And, it definitely does not give you the right to throw away someone else’s food just because you don’t like it.
Redditor Hugsi-Panda3044 encountered this very issue with his spouse. So he turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for moral judgment.
“AITA for ‘punishing’ my husband for throwing away my dinner?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“To preface: My husband 33 and I 29 have been together for 4 years. He’s vegan and I’m not. He cooks for himself and I cook for myself since he doesn’t eat meat products.”
“Last night I prepared dinner and sat on the couch to eat and watch TV. I heard my phone ring upstairs and went to answer it as it was an important call. I got caught up in the conversation and didn’t realize I spent 6 min on the phone.”
“I went downstairs after the call ended and saw my husband sitting on the couch.”
“I looked past him and saw my dinner plate was gone. I looked around asking if he touched it and he said he dumped the food in the trashcan because It looked like It was left on the coffee table for a long time and there was bad smell coming out of it.”
“Almost like the meat was ‘rotting’ inside and said that while making a disgusted face.”
“I was floored I yelled at him ‘what the hell is wrong with you?!!! I just prepared dinner for myself and was about to eat but had to take a 6 min phone call and come back!!'”
“He said he didn’t know food was fresh since he was in his office working. But still instead there was weird smell coming from the plate.”
OP still thinks his spouse should’ve left it alone.
“I said it was non of his concern and he should’ve left it alone but he defended himself saying it wasn’t his fault his eyes got tired of working and wanted to watch TV but I decided to leave meat laying around for him to feel disgusted knowing how he reacts to being exposed to meat products.”
“He started making gagging sounds then went on about the living room being mutual space and I disrespected him by leaving meat around.”
“I mentioned that he always eats his food in the living room, sometimes the bedroom even. He said ‘so, you’re saying you’re disgusted with my cooking?’ I asked if he was disgusted with mine but he explained that his problem was me leaving meat on display with total lack of consideration for his health.”
“We got in a big argument then I went upstairs and refused to do the dishes after he reminded me since that’s my part of chores (true). He ended up doing them himself and started complaining I was punishing him for what happened by making him do the dishes with his injured (he had an accident) hand.”
“I said since his injured hand threw my dinner away then it can do the dishes just fine but he said I’m violating the deal and not sticking to my part of chores.”
“AITA? I’m thinking maybe he was right in that the living room is shared space and I shouldn’t have left meat there.”
Redditors gave their opinions on the situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors agreed OP was not the a**hole.
“Honestly, I haven’t eaten meat for 10+ years and it’s pretty f*cking obvious that freshly cooked plate of meat isn’t rotting.”
“It also won’t affect his health to have it in his vicinity. These are all just bullsh*t excuses. As a vegan that genuinely pisses me off cause he just wasted meat just be a petty AH.” ~ Tanooki07
“Yeah I’m a vegetarian of almost 20 years, this dude’s just really dumb and trying to make a point.” ~ angeryacorn
“It’s still wasteful and disrespectful. Plus, it’s supporting the meat industry more, which is something the husband should have thought about if he actually cares. He sounds like he’s trying to nag and guilt his wife into becoming vegan.” ~ almondcookie
“He may just be out to nag and guilt his wife, using this as the pretext.”
“If he really wanted her to be vegan–or to move in that direction–then he could be cooking falafel for two or making lentil casseroles. Make it easy for her to grab the vegan option.”
“Within any movement some individuals are more interested in being righteous than in doing right. You can spot those individuals by how they undermine the movement’s values when they see a chance to coerce someone into compliance. To those specific individuals, controlling how other people live is the real goal. The movement is just a pretext to them for claiming the moral high ground. Throwing out someone’s fresh dinner is a power play.”
“To be clear, this emphatically does not apply to veganism as a whole. It’s a personality problem, not a movement problem. Similar petty tyrant behavior occurs in all sorts of settings from religion to HOAs.”
“What I’m saying is his guy could volunteer to do more of the cooking and come up with scrumptious plant-based recipes, if minimizing animal suffering is his actual goal. (Plenty of vegans are wizards at that type of diplomacy).” ~ doublestitch
“I guess, unless OP is as petty as I am – I’d be getting a burrito bowl from Chipotle with extra carnitas and some carnitas on the side, pile it up and eat it in bed, as soon as he was ready to sleep.”
“And prolly oink and/or moo every couple bites, just to drive it home.” ~ SandyDelights
“I’ve only been a vegetarian for a few weeks, but I definitely am under the mentality of “if you eat meat, at least don’t throw it away”. Throwing away food in general is one of my biggest pet peeves, but throwing meat annoys me even more.” ~ knittnens
“I’ve been veggie since birth. I’ve never eaten meat once. And even I know the difference between ‘freshly cooked’ and ‘left out too long’ meat.”
“If the husband wants to throw a tantrum like a child, he should expect to be treated like one. NTA, OP, and you handled this with a lot more grace than I would.” ~ CrazySnekGirl
Food should not be wasted like that.