Living with roommates is always a delicate balance.
Particularly when it comes to the financial aspect of it.
Ideally, everyone should contribute equally to communal items, such as toilet paper, paper towels, dish and hand soap, and cleaning supplies.
In a perfect world, everyone would also contribute equally to the rent, but not everyone agrees to this.
Redditor mikziggy_14 shared an apartment with her girlfriend and one other roommate.
The trio initially came up with an equitable division of the rent and bills.
However, the third roommate eventually contested the amount she should be paying for the apartment.
A suggestion neither the original poster (OP) nor her girlfriend was willing to agree to.
Wondering if she was being unreasonable, the OP took to the subReddit “Would I Be The A**hole” (WIBTA), where she asked fellow Redditors:
“WIBTA If I made my roommate pay rent?”
The OP explained why her roommate wanted to lower the amount of rent she owed:
“Hi there!”
“I really just need some clarity on this situation.”
“So any advice is really helpful.”
“So to set the stage, I (Marie, 22 F[emale]), my girlfriend (Aspen, 21 F), and our roommate (Mia, 20 F) have lived in a 2-bed 2-bathroom apartment in our college town since April.”
“It’s in a decent neighborhood ,and rent is about $1,400 a month plus utilities.”
“We split rent 3 ways, but because I make a little bit more money, I pay a little more.”
“So the split usually ends of being 500/450/450 and utilities equally.”
“The conflict is that Mia feels that she shouldn’t pay rent when she isn’t here during school breaks.”
“So over the summer (June-August) she didn’t pay rent or utilities, but her stuff was still here.”
“Aspen and I didn’t want to make it a fight, so we just paid the rent and left it alone.”
“However, now that Christmas break is coming up, she texted our group chat and said she doesn’t think she should pay rent for December because she is going home on the 13th and won’t be back till January 15th.”
“I don’t think that it’s fair, though, because again, her stuff is here, it’s still her apartment.”
“I understand that it might be difficult for her because she won’t be working over the break, but that’s not my fault.”
“Aspen and I also have money issues (vet bills, car maintenance, etc), and I don’t think she should be able to just pick and choose when she pays.”
“So Reddit, WIBTA if I made her pay rent?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community resoundingly agreed that the OP was not the a**Hole for making Mia pay rent even when she was away.
Everyone agreed that Mia simply didn’t understand how a lease worked, and by her logic, if she did not want to pay rent during her time away, then she should also move all her things out during that time as well.
“NTA – this is not how the world works.”
“Why should you and Aspen pay Mia’s portion of the rent when she’s not there?”
“What if all three of you went home for winter break?”
“Would no one be obligated to pay rent?”
“I’m sure the landlord would love that.”
“Mia’s request is absurd.”- eury13
“If that’s her mailing address and her stuff is there, she pays rent.”
“That’s like having a car payment and telling the bank that you shouldn’t have to make payments if you don‘t drive the car.”
“Ridiculous.”
“The issue is that she’s taking up the room, and if she weren’t there, you’d have a different roommate paying rent.”
“You could conceivably let her slide on paying utilities if you wanted a compromise, since she‘s not there to use the water/power, but I wouldn‘t.”
“NTA.”- JennyM8675309
“NTA.”
“That’s a lot of entitlement.”
“Tell her to move her stuff out so you can rent it to someone else while she’s away or else she pays rent.”- vt2022cam
“NTA.”
“I would also make her pay you guys back for the summer months that she didn’t pay.”- Iridecent-Cold-Fire
“NTA.”
“She doesn’t seem to understand how rent works.”
“Explain to her, she’s free to stop paying rent as soon as she moves out and takes all her stuff.”-bmw5986
“NTA.”
“If she is on the lease/has her stuff in the apartment, or is coming back, then she pays rent.”
“If she were renting on her own, then she would have to pay rent when she went home.”
“Same rules apply when you have roommates.”
“Also, your salary is irrelevant to the percentage of rent you pay.”- General-Toe-8686
“NTA.”
“That’s not how this works.”
“That’s not how any of this works.”- law-and-horsdoeuvres
“Ywnbta!”
“However, I doubt you will convince her to pay through a normal and logical conversation.”
“She won’t move her stuff out because she feels entitled to the space.”
“So teach her another way.”
“Okay Roommate 3, we are about to list your room for rent.”
“What are the exact dates you will be gone?”
“Oh, and take out anything valuable so it doesn’t get stolen!”
“What do you mean we ‘cant’ rent ‘your’ room?”
“If you’re not paying rent, it isn’t your room!”
“We aren’t getting shorted again.”
“If you don’t pay, you don’t have a room.”
“We paid three months of your rent already this year.”
“We will rent ‘the’ room out permanently if we have to, but we aren’t paying any more rent for you!”-fromhelley
“NTA.”
“It’s still the apartment she lives in, she still needs to pay for it.”- Iridecent-Cold-Fire
“When I went on a work tri,p I didn’t use my house or my car for a month.”
“Still had to pay for both.”
“NTA.”- Individual_Check_442
“NTA.”
“She needs to pay her rent.”
“It’s not optional, and that includes the summer months when she’s not there.”
“She can arrange for someone to sublet (with your approval of whoever it is and if your lease allows it), but that’s as far as it goes.”
“Mia needs to live in the dorms if she can’t pay rent like an adult.”- Peep_Power_77
“NTA.”
“Tell her to please take all of her stuff with her if she’s not paying.”- browneyedredhead1968
“This is completely ridiculous.”
“She rented an apartment.”
“Not a hotel.”
“What the hell does she think will happen when she eventually gets her own place?”
“Her landlord will say sure, no worries on the December check?”
“Please ask her this question.”
“Dying to know what she thinks would transpire.”
“20 years old is way too old for this behavior.”
“Tell her that she can come and go as she pleases—and she’s still on the hook for her 1/3 of the rent regardless of where in the world she is.”
“NTA.”- Superb-Dream1626
“Tell her to move her stuff for the time she is gone so that you can sublet the room.”
“That if she won’t pay rent, you need to be able to make up that money.”
“She is being an entitled a**hole.”
“NTA.”- Quick-Possession-245
“NTA.”
“If her stuff is there, she’s there.”
“She can pay or move out.”- RoyallyOakie
“Are you joking that is f*cking insane.”
“If this were a Judge Judy episode, her things being there means she lives there, and she needs to pay for it.”
“If her stuff wasn’t there, you’d get someone to fill the spot.”
“Stop being a pushover, YWNBTA.”– iraven_mccoy
“NTA.”
“She’s delusional about how rent works.”
“If she wants to not pay rent, she has to take all of her stuff and not be mad if her place is given to someone else.”
“She has to pay rent for her stuff to stay and for the knowledge that she has a place to come back to.”- Camping_Queen_13
“NTA.”
“She still has the option to use the room during that time.”
“But you could all discuss renting her room out to another friend/traveller to pay her share if that’s something you’re comfortable with.”
“It’s like if she bought a pie.”
“She doesn’t get to return the pie a week later because she didn’t eat it.”
“She purchased the option of eating the pie.”
“If she wants her money back from the pie, she needs to resell it, which is time and effort.”
“As for utilities, if you wanted to be super nice, you could check the bills to see how much the base rates are (ongoing connection, bill fees, etc) and charge her a third of that.”
“You’re not doing her any favors allowing her to live in this made-up world of hers.”- TeddyBear181
It is frustrating to be paying for space when we’re not using it.
Unfortunately, that’s just how renting a space works, at least on an annual lease.
If Mia gives the OP a hard time about this and chooses to find another living situation, she might be surprised to find that just about every other potential roommate will be equally uninterested in agreeing to her proposed arrangement.