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Redditor Refuses To Go To Sister’s Wedding Because Her Fiancé Was In A Relationship When They Met


A family member getting married should be cause for celebration.

But Redditor Mysisterissue doesn’t feel like their sister tying the knot is something worth celebrating, even though she is adored by her fiancé.

The Redditor stayed true to their convictions and caused drama after making a decision about attending the wedding.

They visited the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit and asked:

“AITA For not going to my sister’s wedding because she got with her fiancé when he was in a relationship?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“My sister Leah is getting married to her fiancé Jason in October. They met in a really inappropriate way…Leah had gotten out of an abusive relationship and went to therapy.”

“Her therapist was Jason and they began a relationship even though he had a long term girlfriend named Ashley.”

“Jason broke up with Ashley and is now getting married to my sister. Leah and Jason invited me and I declined.”

“Leah called and asked why I said no and I told her that she’s essentially a homewrecker and her and Jason won’t work out because he’ll leave her for somebody else.”

“Their marriage was built on lies and deceit. Leah started to cry and said she knows Jason won’t leave her because they’re both in love.”

“To be fair he treats her very well and they seem happy, but I’m still not going and everyone in my family is mad at me.”

“I reached out to Ashley and apologized to her on my sisters behaviour.”


In edit, the OP added:

“I talked to Ashley and she said her and Jason were doing amazing and this came out of nowhere.”

“They didn’t believe in marriage or kids so she’s baffled why he’s getting married and wanting to have kids with Leah. Ashley is heartbroken and I want to meet up with her for coffee.”

Strangers on the internet were asked to declare one of the following:

  • NTA – Not the A**hole
  • YTA – You’re the A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everybody Sucks Here

Redditors weighed in with their thoughts on the situation.

“First of all… Your sister isn’t the guilty one here at all. A therapist is never supposed to go after one of their own patients.”

“That is not appropriate. *Edited to add judgement ESH… The sister/patient and his ex are victims.” – kaceymckenonne

“This guy needs to be reported and lose his license. This is such a breach in ethics to go after a client especially one who is vulnerable having just come out of an abusive relationship.” – Beecakeband

“He’s a predator. OP shouldn’t be calling her sister a homewrecker. She should be worried she’s being further abused. She was already vulnerable and this dude is preying on that.”

“OP, YTA for blaming your sister for being taken advantage of (again).” – Beginning_Friendship

“So – The Sister who was in Therapy for getting out of an Abusive relationship and ended up with the Therapist responsible for helping her through all that at the time.”

“Gets called a ‘Homewrecker’ and a bunch of other abusive crap doubting her current relationship by her own Sister.”

“OP, Irregardless of the circumstances behind their relationship and notwithstanding that this Jason guy is highly inappropriate for what He did.”

“You are a massive a**hole and a toxic family member at that for how you have approached this and how you have essentially abused your sister.”

“She was in therapy for abuse, taken advantage of by her therapist and all you’ve done is call her names, make her cry and now creating waves by contacting another vulnerable person in this triangle.”

“You’re a real character aren’t you? Wow. Just wow. I hope your entire family aren’t like you are.” – redcookiestar

“I hope Jason lost his license and is no longer a therapist. If not, someone should report him. It is inappropriate for him to date his client. It creates a power imbalance. Jason is more at fault. He took advantage of your sister.”

“Edit: YTA. Your unwillingness to go their wedding have nothing to do with morality or ethics.”

“You claimed that your moral is not allowing you to go to their wedding but your moral or ethic does not seem enough to care about the unethical situation of Jason taking advantage of your sister.” – Noctisv020

“YTA – you went way too far by reaching out to a stranger to discuss her failed marriage.”

“That was absolutely none of your business, and unless you are Jason or Ashley you actually have no idea what went on in their relationship or why they broke up.” – ConsciousCard

“Good gosh, YTA. If you’re going to refuse to support this marriage, at least do it on the grounds that therapist Jason shouldn’t have dated his client, not because your sister is a ‘home wrecker.'” – JeepersCreepers74

“YTA for everything you did here to your sister. For reasons others have explained, she is a victim here.”

“Unless she has previously committed some horrible sin against you, I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t try to support her through this obvious mess.”

“Yes, Ashley is also being victimized but that doesn’t mean YOU need to be the one who insults Leah and stabs her in the back! This reads like you hate her. Why do you have more compassion for this stranger than your own sister?”

‘I want to meet up with her for coffee.’

“WHY?” – normanbeets

“YTA. Regardless of what your sister did, it’s not okay for you to call your sister a homewrecker and tell her that her marriage won’t work out.”

“You don’t know the ins and the outs of Jason’s relationship with Ashley, and it was not okay for you to just randomly reach out to Ashley and apologize on your sister’s behalf.”

“It was not your apology to give. It’s completely up to you whether or not you attend the wedding, but you went about this the wrong way.” – evie_xoxoxo

“YTA. Your sister’s therapist violated professional and ethical boundaries by starting a relationship with her, but you call her the home wrecker?”

“Instead of the guy who was actually in the relationship? It sounds like you have some weird resentment towards your sister going on, and you are trying to center yourself in her wedding, which is an AH move.”

“You should be there to support your sister and stop making her relationship about your feelings. If you don’t, be prepared for your sister to drop you the moment you need family support and your actions don’t live up to her standards.” – KittySnowpants

Overall, the judgments were not in favor of the OP.

Regardless of how Jason violated professional protocol in getting romantically involved with his client, many Redditors thought the OP was out of line by reaching out to Ashley instead of being more compassionate and understanding towards the sister.

Written by Koh Mochizuki

Koh Mochizuki is a Los Angeles based actor whose work has been spotted anywhere from Broadway stages to Saturday Night Live.
He received his B.A. in English literature and is fluent in Japanese.
In addition to being a neophyte photographer, he is a huge Disney aficionado and is determined to conquer all Disney parks in the world to publish a photographic chronicle one day. Mickey goals.
Instagram: kohster Twitter: @kohster1 Flickr: nyckmo