Enlisting the help of a babysitter to watch one’s children demands a whole lot of trust.
Whether the sitter comes highly regarded from a trusted referral, or it’s a family member or a friend, nothing raises the stakes quite like the safety and well-being of a child.
A recent post on the “Am I the A**hole (AITA)” subReddit illustrated the lengths some parents go to ensure that safety.
The Original Poster (OP), known as jonesbbqqq on the site, used the post’s title to explain the source of conflict.
“AITA for getting uncomfortable about hidden cameras around the house I [20-year-old female] babysit for?”
OP began by sharing a recent, surprising incident.
“I babysit my boyfriend’s 9-month-old baby cousin for his aunt 3 times a week and I was never made aware of cameras around the house directly pointed at me.”
“This makes me extremely uncomfortable because I had no clue and it’s been weeks and now know I’ve changed in front of the cameras and stuff.”
“Today, every time I opened the baby’s door I heard a camera click on and I realized that I was being watched.”
Then OP shared some reflections.
“I am 100000% okay with cameras to watch babysitters! Especially when they’ve had a bad experience in the past. I work in childcare and babysitting and fully support checking on those watching your kids!”
“But I also believe I deserve privacy OR I should at least be made aware that I am being watched. I have no clue if they’re on, if they’re being checked, or if there’s more somewhere else.”
“I brought it up to my boyfriend and his mom called the baby’s mom (my boyfriends aunt) and apparently got mad at her.”
Then word made it to the baby’s father.
“The father then came home unexpectedly and absolutely ripped me a new one for telling my boyfriend I was uncomfortable.”
“He started telling me the cameras didn’t work, but I told him it turns on every time i walk in so I know it’s on. then told me they don’t even have time to check them, and then he also said it was actually so their neighbor can watch him, not them.”
OP felt stuck.
“So I was just confused, alone in the house with his angry father who makes me extremely uncomfortable to begin with.”
“Like he was just piling on excuses and getting mad that I had an issue with the fact that I didn’t know. He said that’s the point of home security but I told him that I’m a young woman and would prefer to know when I am being watched.”
“He was so rude to me about talking to my boyfriend about how I feel. I didn’t know my bf was going to tell his mom and start a huge deal.”
But she had some views to share.
“I told the baby’s father that as a young woman, secretly being monitored like that makes me very uncomfortable and I just would have liked to know so I was aware just in case I had to change.”
“He got pi**ed and said that it’s “not about that” and I know that but I was just telling him my concerns.”
“He told me I should never be reaching out to my bf about absolutely anything and must text him but he makes me uncomfortable and I never feel like I can talk to him.”
Again, OP found herself counting the seconds.
“I just had to sit there alone while this man I barely know angrily barged in and absolutely roasted me for being uncomfortable?”