Woman Livid When Boyfriend Refuses To Immediately Clean Up After He Peed The Bed

We've all had one of those nights when we were utterly exhausted, and if a spill or a mess happened in the home, we were much less likely to want to clean it up, hoping that we could just do it tomorrow.

But if an accident happens in the bed, that kind of mess really can't wait, no matter how tired you are, pointed out the members of the "Am I the A**hole?" (AITAH) subReddit.

Redditor Hour-Possibility2219 was alarmed when she woke up to wetness in the bed, soon to realize that her boyfriend had an accident in his sleep.

But when he was so tired, he didn't want to clean it up and just wanted to throw a towel over it instead, the Original Poster (OP) was disgusted and forced him to clean it up.

She asked the sub:

"AITAH for how I responded when my boyfriend peed the bed and did not clean it up right away?"

The OP recently woke up to a very unpleasant surprise.

"My boyfriend (27 Male) and I (23 Female) just moved into a new house and bought a new mattress."

"Last night, I woke up to a wet feeling under my arm and hand. My boyfriend was already up and in the bathroom."

"When he came back, I asked him if he spilled something in the bed or knew why it was wet."

"He told me that he thinks he peed the bed. I asked him again and said, 'Wait, are you serious??'"

"And he said, 'I think I peed in my dream and peed in real life.'"

"We are both half awake at this point, and I'm just surprised that he actually did wet the bed."

The OP was quick to start cleaning up the mess.

"I asked him to go grab stuff to clean it up, and he told me that it was fine."

"I asked him what he meant by that, and he grabbed a towel, laid it on the wet spot, and got back into bed to go to sleep."

"I pulled the covers off of him and told him that he needs to go grab stuff to clean it up because I don't want it to get stained, and it's a new mattress, and we don't have a mattress cover for it yet."

"He told me that it was fine and that I was overreacting. That statement naturally p**sed me off, and I told him I'm not going to sleep in his piss and that's not fair to me."

"He told me he'd clean it in the morning and that it's not a big deal and doesn't warrant the reaction I have."

The OP was furious with her boyfriend by that point.

"That was not the solution I wanted, so I took all the sheets off the bed and threw them at him and told him to sleep on the couch."

"It was very irritating hearing him tell me that I'm overreacting because I asked him to clean up his pee in the bed we both slept in."

"He then knocked on the door ten minutes later, asking for a new blanket because the one I gave him smelled like pee."

"AITAH?"

Fellow Redditors weighed in:

• NTA: Not the A**hole
• YTA: You're the A**hole
• ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
• NAH: No A**holes Here

Some reassured the OP that she was not being unreasonable or "overreacting." 

"I hope OP told him, 'So you don't want to sleep with the smell of your own pee, but you expected me to sleep IN YOUR PEE?!?' What a tool!" - Corfiz74

"NTA. That's disgusting, and it's really concerning that he thought it was at all appropriate to curl up and sleep in a puddle of pee." - Allaboutbird

"Got to tell you that lack of concern on his part tells me this is a more regular experience than he is letting on. His reaction would blow my mind. NTA." - whatsmypassword73

"I feel like I'm taking crazy pills, but was he really going to be okay with sleeping in dirty bed sheets until someone, doesn't matter who honestly, had to insist that it was insulting to them since they partly owned the bed and sheets and NOT simply because they were COVERED IN P*SS?"

"The personal standards of this man are questionable. Glad the relationship can find a respectful conclusion, but no one should be okay with sleeping in their own p*ss." - MeaninglessDebateMan

"As an adult with frequent incontinence, I clicked on your first post fully expecting to defend your boyfriend. Based on the title of your post, I expected a really insensitive reaction to an accident that he almost certainly couldn't help, and was likely embarrassed about."

"After reading the post, I think you handled it really well. I was shocked at your boyfriend's choice to go back to sleep and clean it in the morning. Pee soaks into fabrics really fast, and could quickly penetrate deep enough that you would never get the smell out."

"You definitely did not overreact, and I hope he shows more concern for your belongings in the future. Mattresses aren't cheap."

"Interrupted sleep sucks, especially if you have trouble getting back to sleep, but that obviously needed to be dealt with immediately."

"I hope he shows more consideration for your feelings when he's fully awake than he did here. Being upset that you didn't want to go back to sleep in a bubble of his pee is crazy." - Inevitable_Chaos_22

Others urged the OP to get a mattress cover as soon as possible.

"Get a waterproof mattress cover. I had to get one because I had an elderly cat who would sometimes pee on my bed. The way he was so blasé about it makes it seem like he's done this before." - Newlron5613

"A waterproof mattress cover is truly worth a ton of gold sometimes." - Nicknamewastoolong

"I have one just because I am a woman and have gotten my period toooooo many times in the night whilst sleeping. Literally 20 to 30 dollars at Ross or Amazon and it has saved my mattress from period blood, a spilled soup (dinner in bed while very ill), and my female dog getting overly excited and peeing on the bed just last week." - yoinkss

"Gross, and also get a mattress cover immediately. You're obviously NTA." - BobVsBart4ever

"Get him to buy you a new mattress, and let him take that one with him as he's leaving your life." - Aggressive_Bat2489

After receiving feedback, the OP shared an update in a second post.

"Thank you guys for the quick replies. After he left for work today, I really couldn't get the situation off of my mind. I thought I'd see what y'all had to say."

"He got back from work today with flowers and my favorite ice cream. He told me he was thinking about what happened last night all day and that he was sorry."

"He apologized for dismissing me and that he was disrespectful."

"I told him that the only issue I had with the situation was him telling me I was overreacting for me wanting him to clean up the pee in the moment. That wasn't fair to me, and expecting me to be okay sleeping in his pee wasn't, either."

"He did order a mattress cover that will be here tomorrow. So until that's on the mattress, I don't want him in the bed with me. I think making him sleep with those sheets and blankets did jolt him awake to realizing the gravity of the situation."

"I'm still a bit hurt from how he handled the situation selfishly and was inconsiderate. But he seems pretty remorseful so we'll see how we both feel later. That's it for now, thank you guys for your advice!"

Fellow Redditors reassured the OP that they or their partners didn't always think clearly, either, when they were tired.

"My husband is a totally different person when he wakes up in the middle of the night. He's grouchy and kind of a jerk."

"When he's properly awake, he's the kindest, most thoughtful person I know. The fact that your BF thought about it all day, realized he was a jerk, and apologized is such a good sign. Sometimes people are just not rational in the middle of the night." - saltandlimes

"My husband won't even remember what happened later. We can have a full-blown conversation where I'm asking, 'Are you sure you're awake?' and he responds to me like an a**hole, saying yes, he obviously is."

"Later, I find out he 100% wasn't, the way I know he actually is awake is when his tone changes back to normal instead of annoyed." - Grouchy_Anteater_605

"I do not condone what he did, but when you hit a certain level of exhausted, your thought process suddenly becomes, 'I don't care, I just need to sleep.' Again, don't condone what he did nor how he reacted, but I understand, having been that tired myself." - JenovaCelestia

"To be honest, I think the main reason he reacted as such is that he was tired. Doesn't excuse him being dismissive, but I think he was probably not fully awake, and if he wasn't with you, probably would've just laid down a towel and gone back to sleep (and regretted it in the morning lol). Glad he apologized." - cuted3adb0y

"I am so sorry, but I laughed out loud at 'he wanted a new blanket because the one I gave him smelled like pee.' You shouldn't have to handle your partner like a toddler, but it's satisfying to read that he actually learned something from it." - lydocia

While some of the subReddit could understand being incredibly tired and not thinking clearly, they were thoroughly grossed out by the fact that the OP's boyfriend expected both of them to just be okay with sleeping in the mess.

Thankfully, the OP's boyfriend apologized and ordered the mattress cover, which suggested that this was genuinely an accident and not something that would be repeated for years to come, especially if the two of them were to get married.