Main Character syndrome is a term used to describe a person who believes that their personal story is the story of everybody.
The idea being that they are the main character in the story of life and we’re all here to push that story forward.
So what happens when this belief conflicts with reality – and with your choice of dress?
That was the issue facing Redditor and Original Poster (OP) labamsy71 when she came to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for judgment.
“AITA for not buying a new graduation dress?”
OP got right to the problem at hand.
“I (17F) bought a champagne-coloured grad dress (I go to a small school so high school grad and prom are the same night/same dance event). So this is a formal prom dress.”
“A couple from my grade just got engaged and announced they’re going to get married the weekend after graduation. The problem is, the bride-to-be is planning to wear white to prom and asked that I get a new dress because mine is too “bridal” and would take away attention from her. I told her no, and her and her friends are being really mean and hostile towards me.”
She was left to wonder,
“AITA? It would be timely and costly to sell mine and buy a new dress, and I really love the one I bought.”
Having explained the situation, OP turned to Reddit for judgment.
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided: NTA
Some pointed out the obvious.
“NTA prom is not her wedding” ~ 0000udeis000
“Corollary: You may safely ignore anyone who mistakes a prom for a wedding (and related wedding rules)”
“I hope they look back at this and cringe.” ~ Ruval
“Prom isn’t her event and has nothing to do with her wedding. Wear your dress!” ~ mozzarella_lady
“Your dress isn’t white. It is champagne colored.”
“If she wanted to color coordinate the grad dresses, she should have informed the people attending way earlier. You already spent your money on a dress.”
“Just because she wants to color-coordinate the grad party, doesn’t mean you have to agree.”
“It’s the grad party of your class, not her wedding.”
“Grad party means the end of high school. The future bride and her friends need to grow up and learn how to behave in the post-high-school world.” ~ DoIwantToKnow6417
“NTA at all.”
“You’re kids celebrating two important events as a class before you venture out into the world and discover how to be adults.”
“If your classmate thinks she can hijack these milestones from everyone else by making herself the center of attention, she’s far too immature to get married, which is no surprise as she is, as I said, a kid.”
“Just ignore her and her friends and wear your dress. Congrats btw!” ~ tessahb
There were those who expressed how age changes your perspective.
“I look back at my 18yo self and cringe all the time. In my opinion, if you’re not cringing at your 18yo self, then everyone else will still be cringing at you.” ~ MagentaKevin
“I’m almost 26, and with every year that passes, I look back at myself from the year prior and think, ‘what an idiot’. We’re human.”
“We grow and learn and change all of the time!” ~ feckingloser
“Super common, unfortunately, at least it was in my area.”
“Half my graduating class got married right out of high school.”
“Most popped out a kid or two and divorced within 1-3 years.”
“I’m only in my 20s, but my entire Facebook feed is baby announcements or divorce drama.”
“The ones who made it past three years are still divorcing left and right.”
“I got married young, but I had at least graduated college and lived with my partner before deciding to tie the knot.”
“Trust me, you don’t know your partner’s annoying little quirks until you’ve lived with them, even if you’ve known them your entire life like I’ve known my husband.”
“Most of the people who got married were couples that would break up every other week, to begin with before ‘making up’ until the next fight.”
“I think my graduating class is just cursed with bad luck to begin with though, since a quarter of them died within a year or two of graduating.”
“Out of the remaining quarter I’m a part of, over half of them, are in jail or prison from things ranging from petty theft to straight-up murder.”
“I called the murder part all the way back in high school. I said for years the guy would end up killing someone.”
“I was wrong about the other guy I said would end up killing someone, though. He ended up becoming infamous on TikTok and became the laughing stock of everyone who knows him personally.”
“People who don’t know him speculate if it’s just a persona made up for Tiktok but I can vouch he’s just f*cking crazy and even worse in real life.” ~ River_7890
Others were concerned about the future.
“To be real though, I’ve been with my partner since hs, and every single couple I know who has rushed into marriage under 20 has been divorced by 30.”
“We aren’t officially married yet but did not rush into an engagement.”
“People change so much mentally and emotionally between 16 and 24 that you really can’t be sure you’ll even still get along.” ~ Auroraburst
“Bingo bango, kids this age getting married bodes ill, particularly ones this bothered about a dress.” ~ SuzannesSaltySeas
“Why is no one else pointing out how ludicrous it is to get married in high school!!!”
“Like Jesus Christ, you haven’t even discovered who you are yet, let alone how you and a significant other can fit with one another.” ~ Kjolter
Commenters embraced the petty.
“Graduation is not her event.”
“Because I’m petty, I’d see how many parents I could convince to get their daughters flowers.”
“So as many girls as possible can be standing around in nice dresses with bouquets.” ~ salamanderinacan
“Ohhhh, prom veils!!” ~ Peachy_Witchy_Witch
“That would be hilarious.”
“Although you’d have to explain the motivation to get people to do it.”
“I mean, I would have if a friend had asked me to for this reason. But again, I’m petty and happy to stick it a bridezilla.”
“Flowers can be encouraged by simply saying to proud parents – but why wouldn’t you buy your daughter flowers for her graduation?”
“Isn’t that just a nice thing to do?”
“Plausible deniability and all that.”
“No, I didn’t mean to stomp on your plan to use graduation as an engagement party. Oh look, Sally’s roses match her dress.” ~ salamanderinacan
Some were worried about bullying.
“You are right… She is wrong… NTA… AND…”
“You may want to consider a change to avoid the drama.”
“See if you can get the dress dyed or altered to avoid a bridal look.”
“The reason I say this is for you… to avoid Miss ‘main character’ trying to ruin your night.”
“Then if anyone asks, you can say… “
“‘oh well Missy is getting married and insisted on being the only one wearing white or a cream. She had people sending me nasty messages, and I just wanted to have fun with my friends… let’s just go have fun'”
“Then they know she is a bully with main character syndrome, and you can enjoy your evening in a killer truffle brown dress that emanates class.” ~ FlyingSpaghettiFell
“NTA but expect them to try to ruin your dress, tbh.”
“High school girls are mean, and if you show up in it, I can see them planning on how to spill punch or sauce or something on it to embarrass you.”
“I wouldn’t get a new dress personally, but I’d be cautious of being around them & their friends.” ~ totally-tarythia
“NTA it’s prom not the wedding (unless they plan to hijack it, getting someone there to officiate). Be cautious. They may try to ruin your dress.” ~ Corpse_Thing
“NTA – I wouldn’t get too near anyone she’s close with while they’re holding drinks.”
“They may have the bright idea to try and ruin your dress MOH-style.”
“Prom is not a wedding, and she should have fun with her idea but mind her business.” ~ synthgender
“But be careful as one or more of them might be planning to ‘spill’ something all over your dress.”
“If it were me, I’d pack a small squeeze bottle of red food coloring.”
“You can easily tuck it into your bra, and if your dress gets ruined, make sure the bride’s dress does too.”
“And get that dye all over her face and arms to f*ck up her wedding pics.”
“Don’t tell anyone. Just do it.”
“You’ll be glad you have that tiny little bottle tucked away when the rage overcomes you after that ruin your dress and start pointing and laughing at you.” ~ shikakaaaaaaa
She did return to express her gratitude.
EDIT: Thank you so much everyone. I’m reading all of your comments! I feel like less of a bad guy now!
We all start with a certain level of self-centeredness, of course.
Every kid thinks they are the main character of the story, but as we mature, we realize that other people have stories just as vibrant as our own.
And sometimes, those people get to wear pretty dresses.