Telling others the harsh truth is a difficult task to take on.
No one wants to be sat down just to have their flaws pointed out.
But sometimes it can be quite necessary.
Case in point…
Redditor Laneway-Sea8642 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback. So naturally, they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
They asked:
“AITA for telling my brother he smells foul and for banning him from my flat after he blamed his low-carb diet and said it isn’t that bad?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My brother has had really bad breath, really bad body odor, and really smelly urine or feces.”
“I’m talking smellier than these things normally are.”
“He’s never had poor hygiene before.”
“I thought he had just gotten lazy because he’s now working from home.”
“Before he was still going in to his office every day because someone needed to be there to do the things that can’t be done from home.”
“Last month his firm gave up the office and made changes which allow everyone to be fully from home.”
“It is so bad no one can stand to be near near him.”
“His foul smell lingered in any room he set foot in.”
“Especially after he used the loo and if you talked to him you had to stand far away because his breath made you want to vomit.”
“I’m dead serious that it was one of the worst things I have ever smelled.”
“I had to go somewhere in a car with him and I couldn’t roll down the windows because it was raining and I nearly vomited.”
“Never again.”
“I know people cannot always smell themselves, so I sat him down and nicely tried to tell him he needs to do something about his breath and odor and the other smells.”
“I was surprised because he was aware of it.”
“He said it’s a side effect of the new low carb diet he’s on.”
“He tried saying it wasn’t that bad and I was exaggerating or pranking him.”
“He’s angry that I told him he smells, and that he is not welcome in my flat because of how terrible it is.”
“He believes I’ve overreacted and he also accused me of turning everyone against him.”
“Because when he asked others if he smelled they said yes and apparently I ‘put them up to it.'”
“I was only trying to do him a favor and help.”
“If I smelled bad I would want someone to tell me.”
“Was I wrong to tell him about it like he says, and should have kept out of it?”
“AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA?:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared our OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA and he needs to see a doctor.” ~ ParsimoniousSalad
“This. I’ve been on a low carb diet for two years and don’t smell like this… and my family would tell me.” ~ crystallz2000
“NTA… I second the trip to the doctor.”
“Had a friend who stank really bad like this, and it turned out to be a stomach ulcer caused by H pylori.” ~ WeisserGeist
“I’ve had terrible breath last year while waiting to take out my tonsils.”
“It was so bad that the room I slept in was absolutely disgusting in the morning.”
“Turned out that my tonsils were literally rotten and so full of bacteria that they put me on a 15 days round of double antibiotics.”
“I was getting some directly through the vein in IV and others in a form of a pill.” ~ dealing_with_living
“This, definitely. My husband is a fastidious man but developed the same horrible breath and body odor.”
“It was his first noticeable symptom of chronic lymphocytic leukaemia (CLL).”
“This isn’t something he should just let slide. NTA.” ~ Background-Ad-4616
“NTA. I have never heard of a low carb diet doing this and this is the first I’m hearing about it.”
“But on the same token, it sounds like something is messing with his system if his pee and poop have changed.”
“Time for him to see a General Practitioner or a specialist.” ~ DiamondHeist1970
“Breath smelling on keto diets is sort of the intention of the diet.”
“Keto is short for ‘ketone-producing.'”
“Once you have very low sugar levels, your brain starts turning fats into ketone bodies to metabolise.”
“This also happens in ketoacidosis, a symptom of diabetes (again related to blood sugar regulation).”
“Ketones are found in a lot of fruits and we manufacture them to use as fruit flavorings.”
“You can smell them on people’s breath, and sometimes they’re strong enough to trigger breathalysers.” ~ tunisia3507
“NTA. Your brother should see a doctor, low carb diets don’t affect people in that way.”
“He may have a medical condition that needs to be addressed.” ~ dembowthennow
“NTA. It is really easy to do things to improve your smell (deodorant, cologne, body wash, breath mint, etc).”
“He would rather get angry and blame shift to you than just take responsibility and take a few extra steps to improve things.”
“Also, I don’t care what he says, a diet can’t change things that dramatically.”
‘Yes, definitely make changes, but not to the point you are genuinely intolerable.” ~ Blake_Raven
“NTA. It’s really difficult to talk to people about these things.”
“But it’s important to both for their sake and for those around them.”
“It’s also a bit concerning, as changes in diet can cause a person to experience gas more (for a time anyway).”
“But it won’t cause an abundance of bad smells from everywhere.”
“That’s either extremely poor hygiene, or he has some underlying health issues that need to be addressed.”
“I feel you though– some people just really don’t believe that they smell worse to others than they do to themselves.”
“I had a roommate who just up and decided to stop wearing deodorant.”
“And the body odor emanating from him (and from his room, even with the door closed) just became too much for me and our other roommate to bear.” ~ Carma56
“I came to say this.”
“My partner and I are on low carb diets because it helps to control his diabetes.”
“And neither one of us dealt with anything more than a little bad breath for the first couple of weeks, during the adjustment to the new diet.”
“Chances are high that there is something severely wrong with his health.”
“It’s likely he’s forcing himself into ketosis, which is not sustainable for long periods of time if a person wants to remain healthy.”
“When forced ketosis became a medical diet, it was specifically for prepubescent diabetic children in an attempt to force their bodies to correct themselves, to help avoid death.”
“It was never meant to be a sustainable thing for healthy adults.”
“People don’t necessarily want to hear and understand that.”
“If that’s what he’s doing, he won’t want to hear it either.”
“But he needs to be seen by a medical professional. NTA.” ~ Salt_Breath_8827
“NTA. When someone has spinach in their teeth you should absolutely tell them.”
“When your loved one has spinach all over their body you should absolutely tell them.”
“Him choosing not to accept that information because he probably has some concept in his mind that this diet is extremely healthy, is his issue.”
“Just continue to press it, because it’s not right if he stinks this bad.”
“Either his hygiene has gone downhill, or his body is not tolerating this new diet well and he needs to switch back up.” ~ JCBashBash
“NTA. I’m not going to speculate as to the ‘real’ reason he stinks.”
“The fact is he smells bad enough to be unbearable to be around, and he needed to know this, so he can start making an informed decision about how to remedy the situation.”
“If he’s sure it’s the result of his low-carb diet, then okay.”
“But he still needed to be aware that the odor was worse than he realizes – that it’s not an ‘I notice a slightly funky smell when I’m near you’ odor,”
“But an ‘I want to gag every time we’re in the same room’ odor.”
“Surely someone would want to know if they smell that bad so they can do something about it.” ~ VisualCelery
“NTA, it’s understandable not wanting to be around someone that stinks so bad, and it’s better to tell him than leave him oblivious.”
“He should see a doctor though, this could be a medical problem if it isn’t simply the result of the diet.”
“The diet should also probably be reconsidered as well.”
“Most low carb fad diets (like freaking keto, ugh) are incredibly unhealthy for most people.”
“And should only be used for certain medical conditions under the instruction of a reputable doctor.”
“Again bringing up keto, it was created for children with epilepsy and other medical conditions, not meant for weight loss or whatever the diet industry peddles it as this week.” ~ ArielxLazarus
Well OP, Reddit is with you on your decision, and they’re also concerned about your brother.
Maybe try talking to him again from a more worried angle.