Parents can be a bit overprotective.
It’s not a crime.
When a parent sends their child off into the world, and they can’t be nearby, they are depending on a lot of blind faith.
A lot of that faith falls onto the teachers and school staff.
And those adults have to make a lot of quick decisions on a daily basis.
Some choices will be fine with most parents, others not so much.
Case in point…
Redditor No_Decision7707 wanted to discuss his experience and get some feedback. So naturally, he came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
He asked:
“AITA for telling the school nurse she’s not a dentist and reporting her?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“On Monday 7-year-old son came home missing his front tooth.”
“It was a bit wiggly but not ready to be pulled.”
“I asked what happened, and he showed me his baby tooth in a baggy and said the nurse pulled it out.”
“WTF?”
“I emailed his teacher, and he said my son was wiggling it a lot and asked him if his tooth was about to fall out.”
“My son said he didn’t know and sent him to the nurse.”
“He said he was expecting her to look and to call me if it was ready to come off.”
“Instead, she pulled it out, and my son was uncomfortable with it.”
“He said it hurt.”
“I spoke with her today and said she had ZERO business doing that.”
“She said his tooth was pretty loose, and she was worried he might swallow it.”
“I said then why didn’t you call me?”
“You are NOT a dentist, and you caused him pain.”
“She said she’s been a school nurse for years.”
“I said then you should have known better, and you’re a disgrace and unprofessional.”
“I did go to the vice principal, who confirmed that is NOT within a school nurse’s scope to pull teeth, and she should have notified me instead.”
“She was pissed off that the school nurse didn’t even send a note that he saw her, which is standard.”
“She did tell me I could have toned down the daddy bear a bit.”
“So AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“OMG NTA!!!”
“I’m horrified on your son’s behalf!”
“That is not ok in any way, OP!” ~ Tired-mama-of-one
“I had this happen with my grandma, and even then, my mom was pissed because I’d scream if anyone tried to get near me because of a loose tooth after that.”
“Hurting a kid like that for no good reason other than being able to exert control over someone.”
“The whole I’ve been a nurse for blah blah blah years, and I thought he’d swallow it just seems extra off for me.”
“This could mean that he might lie if it’s ever stuck rather than asking for help with it.”
“Because, to be honest, it always freaking hurts if someone pulls a tooth that’s not ready.”
“The little bit that the tooth is still holding onto your body with is the damn nerve supply and maybe a little bit of other tissue, so of course it hurts to go yanking it out or generally f**king with it beyond wiggling.”
“I hope this wasn’t motivated by the teacher or the nurse thinking he’s too distracted with his loose tooth because I guarantee that they dealt with it as kids, and I’ve never known someone able to ignore a loose tooth.” ~ ThatDiscoSongUHate
“It is wild how much parenting and schooling has changed since I was in elementary school (I just did the math, and f**k I’m old).”
“My first-grade teacher pulled my tooth, wrapped it up in pink tissue, and gave me a little plastic box to take it home in.”
“I was so excited about the box and happy that the tooth was out.”
“I still have the plastic box and the tooth today.”
“My parents even made me write her a thank you note. Lololol.”
“But I was also paddled three times in second grade for having chapstick, and once for calling the teacher a liar when she told me Santa wasn’t real, so…” ~ Rae_Regenbogen
“One of the kindergarten teachers was known to be really good at pulling teeth.”
“Other teachers from all over the elementary school would send kids to his class to have their teeth pulled.”
“It was downright exciting when your teacher was like, ‘hmmm… I think you might need to go see Mr. Phillips.'”
“To my 30-year-old ears, this seems like such a non-issue, OP.” ~ hochizo
“NTA. I believe under common law, a school nurse can’t do that without express permission or in an emergent situation, which does not seem to apply here at all.”
“Hope she learns from this, but sorry your son had to be the example that will teach her.” ~ 1Rain2RuleThemAll
“Nurses cannot extract teeth, period.”
“It’s just not within our scope.”
“This lady way overstepped and needs to be reported.”
“Get these control freaks who don’t understand consent out of my profession.” ~ DanelleDee
“NTA. She did something she was NOT cleared to do.”
“Which I’m pretty sure is illegal.”
“What if the tooth wasn’t fully ready to come out, and something had gone wrong.”
“Your son told you he felt pain + he was scared.”
“He’s likely never to want to go to her again.”
“So don’t take it down. Report her.” ~ Charming-Mirror9277
Some Redditors felt differently…
“YTA, if the kid is spending time wiggling the tooth, becoming a distraction, and it’s hanging by a thread, they can pull it.”
“It’s about a second of pain.”
“OP is way overreacting.”
“Does he really want to get this nurse in that much trouble over a tooth?”
“My kids and grandkids have all brought home the lost tooth in a special box given by the school nurse or teacher.”
“Some were wiggled out by the nurse or the teacher if they were really loose.”
“All the kids were excited that the tooth fairy was coming.”
“OP, get a grip.”
“If your child is that traumatized, maybe you should home school.” ~ Itbemedjg
“These comments are wild to me.”
“I have five kids and can’t even count how many times one of them has lost a tooth at school.”
“In fact, for my youngest daughter (7), we have a joke that her teeth ONLY fall out at school.”
“I know for the last one that came out, it was hanging by a thread, and the school nurse basically touched it and fell out.”
“But if you ask our daughter, you’d think the woman held her down with pliers.”
“Plenty of times with my kids, we’ve had to help a tooth that was just barely still attached and had gotten annoying and had to give it a tug.”
“It’s a baby tooth that was obviously ready to come out.”
“OP needs to relax.” ~ makerblue
“It’s just f**king baby teeth, chill out.”
“I even doubt it caused him pain.”
“Kids can be liars and a**holes.”
“My nephew had a super loose tooth, and my Sister was like, ‘Well, if it hurts, ill give you five bucks,’ came out in less than a second, and then he said it ‘hurt’ and then skipped off with his five bucks. YTA.” ~ Mongoose-SR
“I’m gonna go with NTA.”
“I’m a dentist, and I wouldn’t pull out a kid’s tooth in my office without getting explicit consent from the parent first.”
“Having said that, it is a baby tooth that, by all accounts, was well on its way out anyway.”
“I cannot tell you how many times a parent or child has come in concerned because ‘this tooth isn’t even loose yet’ when it is, in fact, quite loose.”
“Point being that it may have been more far gone than you or your son realized.”
“I don’t want to minimize any trauma this causes you or your son, but it is unlikely that he suffered severe pain in the pulling, and rest assured he will be ok.”
“Could you have toned down your response a notch? Yes.”
“Was it appropriate to bring this up with the school admin and escalate? Also, yes.” ~ sh-tcoyote
“Could you have toned down your response a notch? Yes.”
“No. I was traumatized by a dentist as a kid having a tooth pulled, and I had my dad next to me.”
“This school nurse had NO training, NO authority, NO permission, and this kid had NO support and by the sounds of it, NO SAY in having his tooth pulled in that moment.”
“This nurse violated a lot of boundaries, so NO, OP should not have toned his response down.” ~ Environmental_Art591
“Our dentist won’t pull a loose tooth at all.”
“He says that’s a parent’s job, and he doesn’t want kids to associate fear of having a simple thing like having a loose tooth pulled with seeing him.” ~ ValuableSeesaw1603
“While It’s true that pulling teeth is not within the scope of practice for a nurse, it’s just a baby tooth.”
“Everyone alive has either pulled their own tooth or had their parent, sibling, or friend pull theirs.”
“You have every right to be upset with someone doing something to your child without your permission (especially with the crap they want to pull today), but please don’t try to ruin this nurse’s career over a baby tooth.”
“It’s not that serious.” ~ BbyBackMosquitoRibs
“Ok, but when I was in elementary school, a first-grade teacher was the designated tooth puller.”
“And you’d get a plastic tooth necklace to put your tooth in after she pulled it.”
“This is the first time in my life (I’m 37) when I realized that this was not a normal thing. HA. NTA.” ~ cbshoe85
Well, OP, Reddit is a little all over the map here.
But plenty of people understand your fury.
Maybe just a calm chat with the nurse will do.
Hopefully, no one needs to be fired.
Fingers crossed the tooth fairy brings your son a nice treasure.