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Woman Upsets Friend By Referring To The Time Her Parents Sold Their House As Her ‘Trauma’

Adam Kuylenstierna / EyeEm/ Getty Images

Sometimes being a good friend means saying uncomfortable truths. If our friends are acting like spoiled brats we should be allowed to call them out in the most respectful way.

Redditor KangarooOverall1247 encountered this very issue with her friend.

So she turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for moral judgment on a hypothetical “Would I Be The A**hole” (WIBTA) scenario.

She asked:

“WIBTA if I told a friend that their experience was not traumatic and that she is spoiled?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“I have a friend (27) that had an agreement with her parents that they would let her live for free in a second home that they own, provided that she was in school and working towards a degree.”

“She dropped out of school 5 years ago and has made no plans to return, while living for free in this home.”

“Her parents decided to sell the house last year. It was a typical home sale and she had about 3 months to pack, move and find a new place.”

“She never packed or found a new place, and as a result ended up moving in (for free) to her childhood bedroom in her parents primary home.”

“Her father and I frantically packed everything days before the closing as she hadn’t done anything her self.”

“She retells the story that the home was sold out from under her and that she wasn’t given the opportunity to buy it(no way she would qualify for a mortgage based on lack of credit and income), and that she became ‘homeless’ after the sale and that the situation was traumatic for her.”

“She keeps acting like an asshole and blaming everything on ‘her trauma.'”

“I am so sick of listening to her retell the events this way so many times, WIBTA if I point out that many people would have been very grateful for years of free living, that she was never homeless and that she is acting spoiled?”

Redditors gave their opinions on the situation by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors agreed OP was not the a**hole.


“She was never homeless.”

“She could move back to her parents’ house. Not everyone can.”

“She’s been living for free for a few years, that’s already a big benefit.”

“Yeah, to her it may seem bad because she was used to the comfort, but it’s not traumatic at all objectively.” ~ No-Jellyfish-1208

“She’s still living for free.”

“Basically, her free home got smaller. Now she only has a free room (and likely free meals etc) with shared use of all the main areas, instead of an entire free house to herself.”

“She didn’t even have to pack. Enablers OP and dad came and did it for her.” ~ TheHatOnTheCat

“I am not entirely sure OP and the dad should be called enablers.”

“The purchase agreement between the seller and buyer may have contained a clause that the home is vacant prior to closing. This is so the new owner doesn’t inherit the tenant and have to deal with evicting her and all that which goes with it. Also there could be financial issues for the seller/dad. Sale falls through, reimbursing buyer expenses (inspections etc, maybe storage fees for the buyers belongings and hotel rooms for buyer until they can move in possibly.”

“It would be easier for the dad (and OP) to pack the daughters stuff.” ~ petitpenguinviolette

“The enabling started long before helping the daughter move back into their house.”

“She dropped out of school 5 years ago and has made no plans to return, while living for free in this home.”

“The enabling started when they let her continue to live there for free for more than one semester without getting back in school. She should have been reminded of the terms the day she stopped going to school with a one semester ultimatum.” ~ GG-1965

Most were shocked her parents still let her stay with them.

“And they’re still letting her live off them!”

“How have they not cut her off and demanded that she get a job by now? Frankly if I was her dad, I would’ve said she’s not setting foot in my house until I see proof of a job or enrollment in a community college.”  ~ tsh87

“If dad is rich enough to support her for the rest of her life and leave an inheritance maybe he just figures F it this one is never gonna change but we still love her so we’ll let her mooch.” ~ mousicle

“Plenty of people have parents rich enough to support them their whole lives but who don’t because they want their children to be independent adults not perpetual adolescents.” ~ lopxuang

“That is true, but plenty of people see it as ‘easier’ (either emotionally or just in general) to let someone mooch.”

“Depending on the Dad’s (and mums?) lifestyle having her live at home might not make a big difference to their lifestyle and depending on what their usual meals are it may only be $1-$2 to make an extra serve…”

“AND it avoids MAJOR confrontation…”

“Not saying this is right, but a lot of people take the easier option, or may think moving her back into just her childhood bedroom they may think ‘THIS will make her shape up and fly right’… maybe… I hope… :-/” ~ TryToDoGoodTA

“Whilst I agree they were enabling, short of buying a skip, I’m not sure there was another way and the buyers of the house did not deserve one spoilt brat and all her worldly possessions lol.”

“I was in a very loosely similar situation except I paid rent and found myself somewhere else to live when my mum was selling. The one thing I didn’t count on was how difficult moving would be for my disabled ass. The kindness of people and me working my butt off is the only way I got moved out in time.”

“I have no sympathy for the friend. She’s an adult and this is what adults have to do sometimes. It’s hard and it sucks but you gotta do it. If I can manage it whilst on crutches, this lady definitely could.”

“She needs to be chucked out the nest at this point really. She won’t learn otherwise.”

“NTA, OP, I fully sympathize.”

“Edit: I think my reply is to the wrong person, as you seem to agree with my first paragraph. Oops!” ~ Silentlybroken

OP’s friend needs to grow up.