When it comes to naming their first child, many couples tend to first look for a name that has a nice flow with whatever the baby’s last name will be.
Other’s simply want a name that is unique, and will stand out from the other children from school.
Many, however, want their children’s names to have some sort of meaning.
Possibly in honor of a dearly departed friend or relative, or maybe in tribute to a place that had significance for them.
The sister of Redditor Euphoric-Macaroon-61 recently had their first child.
When the original poster (OP) learned the name their sister gave her daughter the same name as her niece, he was surprised, to say the least.
Namely owing to the fact that the OP’s sister in no way wanted to honor his wife by giving her daughter the same name.
Eventually leading him to throw some choice words in her direction.
Wondering if they were out of line, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where he asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for calling my sister a petty brat and saying I felt sorry for her daughter because of her name?”
The OP explained why he was anything but touched by his sister giving her daughter his wife’s name:
“My sister gave birth to her daughter 7 weeks ago.”
“We’re not that close anymore but at one time we were.”
“But she’s a d*ck to my wife and I can’t stand by that so we’re low contact.”
“I don’t call her, don’t answer if she calls me, but I will see her when it’s something family related and I will be civil and polite to her typically.”
“When I say she’s a d*ck to my wife is because she’s so petty with her.”
“My wife is Irish.”
“She didn’t grow up in the US and only moved here in her 20s.”
“So she has a very strong connection to her home.”
“She has a strong accent and her name is Irish and she’s very protective over people saying it correctly, and rightly so in my opinion.”
“My wife is Ciara, for those who’ll wonder.”
“My sister poked fun at the way my wife said certain things, like tomato.”
“She told my wife she was saying it wrong.”
“Because my wife could stand up for herself and would just roll her eyes if my sister made a bigger deal out of it my sister got annoyed.”
“So she started to make a point to say my wife’s name like we would say it with that spelling and told my wife she’s in America now so she should accept her name being said like that.”
“I told my sister she was acting like a kid and to cut it out.”
“The final straw was when we were expecting our first child and my sister told us we better not pick an Irish name and my wife better not teach our kid to say things weird.”
“I told my sister she was so f*cking ignorant it was crazy because different parts of the world will have different accents and different names for things.”
“I also told her my children will be half Irish and if we wanted to give them Irish names it was nothing to do with her.”
“And we went low contact after that.”
“So now my sister has a daughter and what did she name her daughter?”
“Ciara.”
“But said in the way we would say it.”
“She made a big point to send me and my wife an announcement about it and the name, and my wife’s specifically came with a pronunciation.”
“I didn’t get that and neither did anyone else in the family.”
“We saw her on Saturday and she was smirking the whole time and loudly saying her daughter’s name for the two hours we were in her presence.”
“Others in the family told her she didn’t need to repeat the name over again but she carried on.”
“She told our parents her daughter loved hearing her name and loved hearing a phonetically correct name.”
“When we were leaving, my sister tried to approach my wife. I stepped in between them, told my sister she was a petty brat, and I felt sorry for her kid being named to spite someone else.”
“I told her she couldn’t be more of a child if she was truly trying to be.”
“All Sunday and yesterday, she was blowing up my phone, angry that I had said that to her.”
“I didn’t reply.”
“AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**Hole for clapping back at his sister.
Everyone agreed that the behavior of the OP’s sister was, indeed, “petty”, and also incredibly unfair to her daughter, with many finding the behavior of the OP’s sister so alarming, they had serious questions about her mental health.
“NTA.”
“Irish girl here.”
“If she is being petty, be petty back, lol.”
“Ok so you said your wife’s name is ciara and your sister named her daughter Ciara and wants pronounce it the Irish way.”
“So next time when your sister says anything. don’t get aggressive, don’t react because what your sister is looking for is a reaction she is doing it to get under your skin.”
“Tell her thank you so much for naming your daughter after my wife she must really mean a whole lot to you and shows you have been thinking about her a lot and just keep smiling and watch her explode.”
“NTA.”
“Aside from anything else Ciara, in Irish, IS phonetically correct, for the Gaelic alphabet and language.”
“Seriously, tell your sister to póg mo thóin.”- ZippyKoala
“NTA.”
“Your sister’s actions indicate she has serious mental issues and is in need of professional help.”
“I feel so sorry for her daughter.”- Comfortable-Sea-2454
“NTA.”
“Your sister might be like a legit psychopath.”
“That’s insaaaane.”- FindAriadne
“NTA.”
“Your reaction was aggressive, sure, but things like that pile up on you.”
“Based on the situation, I’d also assume that her choosing that name was intentionally done as an attention-seeking move—something to poke at a hornet’s nest, if you will.”
“It’s a bit ironic that she was very adamant about you guys not picking an Irish name but ended choosing one for herself, lol.”
“Even with American pronunciation, that still doesn’t take away the origins of the name.’
“IF she really did pick out the name Ciara with no other intention or preference other than to stir the pot, I bet $10 she’ll eventually get tired of the whole situation and want to change it later down the line.”
“It’s a bit strange as to how strongly your sister seems to be fixated on your wife though.”
“Is she not used to having any ethnic friends at all, even as someone who lived in the US?”-hopefullyhelpfulyaps
“I’m Irish, and I’ve never heard Ciara pronounced anything other than Kee-era.”
“How does your wife pronounce it?”
“Regardless, NTA because your wife has a preference for her name and our accent is lovely and your sister sounds like a d*ck.”- blueboatsky
“Wow named out of spite.”
“This kid is going to Hate her mother.”
“And if she grows up to be just as vocal about it as her mother she will let everyone know.”
“Everyone.”
“You don’t need to do a thing, your sister is the grand master at f*cking up her life, let her do it then sit back with a grin.”
“The best revenge is to live your best life.”
“NTA.”- Drag0ns_Shad0w
“NTA.”
“In fact I’d stay away from your sister.”
“She sounds like she could do some really messed up things if she escalated.”
“She truly does sound ignorant and also like there may some mental health issues in play.”-Orphan_Izzy
“NTA.”
“Doesn’t she realise that within the USA there are many different accents and that pronunciation varies widely from one region to another?”
“She sounds rather unpleasant.”- diminishingpatience
“NTA.”
“Your sister is so obsessed with your wife, she named her child after her.”
“Not how you say her name, but still named her child after her as her name written down.”
“Maybe she should let that sink in.”- AkayaTheOutcast
“NTA!”
“I’m a second generation born in America Irish.”
“I understand the punctuations of words.”
“I lived in Ireland for the first 10 years after I was born.”
“Kids are mean.”
“But ur sister is an adult and sounds super petty.”
“When I had my daughter I gave her a very Irish name, mom’s family loved it.”
“Dad’s side didn’t.”
“It’s Caitriona.”
“My ex’s mom called her Cathy cuz it was better in her opinion.”
“If I was ur wife, I would make a big deal about how my niece is named after me and that’s so awesome.”
‘Make it a huge thing too!”- mamabearzlife
It’s hard not to agree with those who have fears about the mental health of the OP’s sister.
That anyone would name a child purely out of spite or to get the goat of another is shocking to the point of concern.
All we can do is see if the OP’s sister will one day wake up and regret her decision.
All the while, she wondered how she might react when others mispronounced her daughter’s name, intentionally or not.