The most mundane tasks can wind up causing the biggest problems.
Driving to work or cleaning the house or filling the dishwasher.
What happens when trouble finds you during one of these typical tasks, you defend yourself against it, and find out that not everyone is pleased with your decision.
That was the issue facing Redditor and Original Poster (OP) LaundryBleaches when he came to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for judgment.
He asked:
“AITA for calling the police on a neighbor who destroyed my laundry?”
OP began with a very brief background.
“A new guy in an apartment and I was doing laundry in a shared laundry room.”
“This old woman called me a pervert because I was washing my underwear in a shared washing machine.”
“I had never heard of this before and she continued to mumble to herself.”
Everything was fun, until…
“Then before I walk away she poor bleach into my clothes.”
“My work clothes and everything.”
“I have to dress business casual for work so it would cost me money. I now have to freaking replace them.”
“I call the police on the lady for destroying my clothes as she continues to yell pervert at me.”
“They come and say she’s in some sort of mental distress and are familiar with her and she leaves in an ambulance.”
“I contacted the landlord, who said he would replace my clothes and I thought that was that until a woman confronted me for calling the cops on her mom and she was placed on a 72-hour hold.”
“She tries explaining that her mom has issues and everyone else understands.”
“I said it’s not my Circus so not my monkeys.”
“The daughter kept trying to talk to me and I told her to go away before I called the police on her as well. I contacted the landlord and I want out of my lease and I’m not living next to crazy bats.”
OP wasn’t sure if he was in the right.
“I feel bad because I have only been there less than two weeks but this is more than I signed up for and some of the neighbors are being crappy to me about what went down with the old lady and her daughter.”
Having explained the situation, OP turned to Reddit for judgment.
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided: NTA
For some, this was about more then clothes.
“NTA”
“You had no idea of knowing that this woman has mental health issues.”
“Her behavior was very likely out of her control, but you handled it properly.”
“What if she had thrown the bleach on you and it had gotten in your eyes or mouth?”
“What if her behavior continued to escalate and she caused physical harm to other tenants or to herself?”
“It’s not this lady’s fault that she has mental health issues.”
“But you do not have to walk around on eggshells because if it.”
“You have a right to use that laundry space to wash your clothes without fear of verbal or physical assault. Her family needs to get her more help.”
“I hope you’re able to find a more suitable living situation but in the meantime, you are under no obligation to turn a blind eye on this lady’s behavior.” ~ effie-sue
“Yeah.”
“This is a safety issue. You’re right the woman could have thrown bleach in OP’s face.”
“The daughter is escalating the situation even more. I can’t blame OP for deciding this is too much and wanting to leave.” ~ ExcitementGlad2995
Others pointed out the daughter’s entitled behavior.
“100%.”
“You don’t get to simply demand that other members of the public maneuver their lives around her mental illness.”
“(To the tune of being out hundreds – maybe even thousands for business casual- of f*cking dollars).”
“If she’s willfully destroying other people’s property because she’s not capable of managing her mental illness, she should be put on a hold. That’s literally what holds are for.”
“She’s a known entity to the police, so clearly not ‘everyone’ just caters to her.”
“She has caused distress or damage to others before as a result of mental illness.”
“Daughter needs to accept the reality that her mother requires care, and not be resentful when that care falls into her lap, because why should it be in all of her neighbours’ laps?”
“She can resent the need to deal with her mother’s hold, maybe even pay for it if it’s the States.”
“And OP isn’t allowed to be upset they’re out time and money because some stranger who happens to be mentally ill destroyed their property?”
“It’s not as if daughter’s call involved offering to pay for any present and future damages in exchange for leniency. She just expected OP not to make a fuss, because then she has to be involved.”
“One day this lady is going to do something that results in a lot worse than a ruined load of laundry and a 72-hour hold.”
“Her mental state needs to be addressed, and daughter doesn’t want to address it.”
“That’s not OP’s problem. It’s precisely like they said: not their circus, not their monkeys.” ~ bslowvldibe
“NTA.”
“The daughter is ridiculous – there is no way anyone should expect you to wash your underwear by hand or carry (just) your underwear to a laundromat to wash them.”
‘”Everyone else understands’ is not an acceptable response to someone destroying your possessions.” ~ SirMittensOfTheHill
There were also personal stories.
“I was in my therapists office a few years ago, it’s a big practice with many different people working there and they offer both individual and group therapy.”
“There was one day I was there for therapy and this guy walked in and was agitated.”
“Ok whatever nothing new.”
“The office serves low-income people and lots of homeless as well.”
“Then this much old man walks in.”
“Agitated guy turns around and attacks old man, knocks him to the ground and just starts going for it while yelling threats.”
“People had to pull crazy dude off the old man.”
“It was scary as f*ck and took place like 2 feet in front of me.”
“Old man was ok and was apparently crazy dude’s dad.”
“Crazy dude got taken into the back then like 1 minute later I got called into session where I promptly had a massive panic attack because of what went down as it set off my ptsd majorly.”
“Was actually just at that office today and there was a homeless lady screaming outside about covid shots being the antichrist and she followed me to my car whole shrieking and waving a ripped up cardboard box then she just walked away and went back to pacing in front of the building.”
“If I could afford literally anywhere else I’d go.” ~ fadedblossoms
“I worked in a residential facility for the mentally ill.”
“I was consistently left completely alone with multiple patients at a time.”
“The very last time this happened, one of the patients hit me in the back of the head while my back was turned.”
“She left a gash just behind my temple, gave me a concussion that left me partially blind for almost a year, and she insisted I ‘deserved it’ because I was ‘putting a spell on her.'”
“I wish I was making this up.”
“I am currently in a lawsuit with the company for attempting to refuse me workman’s comp.”
“They claim I ‘provoked her,’ even though the whole thing was on camera and the company was in violation of several laws by not having three or more people with the patients at all times.”
“They also refused to meet ADA reasonable accommodation for me to return to work because it would have meant having a second person with ME at all times (they actually went on record admitting this).” ~ DonTreadOnMeIMADuck
For some, this really was just a case of “not my problem”.
“NTA.”
“Obviously your neighbour has some issues, but these are not your issues and they should not interfere with you or your property.”
“Perhaps the lady needs to be in supported accommodation rather than independent living.” ~ Carliebeans
“NTA.”
“The reason she did it is irrelevant on your end.”
“She destroyed your belongings, you took the next logical step.”
“I hope she gets the help she needs, she certainly can’t keep going around hurting other people. Best of luck getting out of your lease” ~ kkhjack
“NTA.”
“How were you supposed to know this lady’s history when this originally happened to you?”
“The daughter is in the wrong here, her mom, mentally stable or not, ruined your clothes and you were right to stand up for yourself in that situation.”
“The lady was also placed on a 72-hour hold because she needed to be, the daughter needs to wake up and realize that no stranger would be gracious to her mother because they have no idea of her conditions.”
“If the daughter really cared, maybe she should have gotten her mom some help.” ~ melanie132
Trouble can find us wherever we are.
How we deal with those problems can make all the difference.
Be kind when possible but always remember to protect yourself.