Very few people are best friends with their neighbors as in sitcoms and films.
Even so, most people at least try to maintain a cordial relationship with their neighbors to avoid awkwardness or tension.
Sometimes, however, neighbors make staying on good terms a challenge.
Redditor ShinePrestigious2128 was having an ongoing issue with her neighbor that was affecting her sleep.
While initially trying to remain friendly, things finally became too much for the original poster (OP).
Leading to a tense confrontation between her and her neighbor.
Upon receiving an ongoing cold shoulder from her neighbors after that, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:
"AITA for screaming at my neighbor over his dog barking at 6 a.m. every morning?"
The OP explained why she found herself sharing some choice words with her neighbor, and the aftermath that followed:
"My neighbour (40s M[ale]) and I (25 F[emale]) live in a duplex, so we have a shared wall."
"I have been working from home for the two years I've lived here."
"Everything started to change when he adopted a beagle mix in the spring of last year."
"Last Tuesday I was up working late on a deadline and didn't go to bed until after 2am."
"Sure enough, 6 a.m."
"There's the high-pitched, nonstop barking that he does every morning when he leaves for work."
"I've come out in my PJs and caught him in the driveway and yelled that he was inconsiderate and that I was done putting up with it."
"He told me not to be so hostile; I told him to control his dog or just find a solution to it."
"His wife was in the doorway, and I'm pretty sure everyone on the street knows."
"For months."
"I've complained dozens of times about the barking."
"I've told him that I work at home, I get very little sleep as it is, the noise is compromising my work, I am feeling stressed and exhausted."
"Each time, he shrugged, claimed he'd 'look into it', and appeared totally unfazed."
"I've left a note on his door, knocked on his door twice, even given him the number of a trainer that I've found."
"Still no progress."
"I also tried white noise machines and earplugs, but the barking came right through."
"Here's the part I can't get over."
"Two days after I shouted, a trainer's van rolled into his driveway."
"In less than a week, the barking ceased entirely."
"It's dead silence in the mornings, and I haven't been waking up at all hours of the night for the first time in months."
"But he still doesn't wave, and his wife gave me a frost at the mailbox."
"A woman on my street told me I could have 'handled it more kindly' because the dog is 'just a puppy'."
"I feel guilty, relieved, and a little bit irritated that it took screaming at him to get him to do what I'd asked gently for months."
"Did I get the results the wrong way, or was it the only way he'd listen?"
"AITA?"
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You're The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- INFO - More Information Needed
The Reddit community was somewhat divided as to whether or not they felt the OP was the a**hole for snapping at her neighbor:
Some felt that the OP"s frustrations were justified, and the neighbors should have apologized for the disruption they caused, even if many pointed out that the OP shouldn't expect to become friends with their neighbors after this:
"I mean... NTA because 6am is way too early and I get how annoying incessant barking is."
"But I also don't get why you're bothered by them not waving or them being frosty to you."
"You've told them about the dog a dozen times, you've left notes, knocked, left the number for a trainer; I would've honestly been annoyed too and not gone out of my way to be friendly."- AluminumMonster35
"NTA here’s my reasoning (assuming you live in the northern hemisphere):"
"If he got the dog spring of last year (2025), this means the dog has been living there for about a year and a half."
"That’s a LONG time to leave the 6am barking unaddressed on the owner’s side."
"Puppy or not, your neighbor does have a responsibility to ensure things like this are kept to a minimum/are being addressed."
"And if you’ve been trying for months to tell your neighbor, it sounds to me like that incident is more like the straw that broke the camel’s back."
"THAT BEING SAID!"
"Everyone else who is saying 'that’s apartment living for ya!' Is ALSO correct!"
"I especially loved the example of 'what if it was a human baby?' that was left by another person."
"The truth is a lot of people love the IDEA of living within a community without accepting the REALITIES of living in a community (in this case, the noise)."
"Plus, 6 am is not an abnormal wake-up time for many people; that’s probably why no one else complained about it that we know of."
"A little something extra to think about."- SunflowerAndSunrises
"NTA."
"Your neighbor is."
"Many People are adopting/getting dogs, but don't realize that dogs need training."
"Barking every morning at 6 am is super annoying, especially when it could be avoided by a few hours of proper training."-NextChapter58251
"NTA."
"Assuming the dozen times you asked were polite before the screaming incident."
"Screaming is childish af, but it seems like they weren't going to contact a trainer unless you got to that level."
"Just accept the peace and quiet and also accept that your neighbors hate you now."-
"It's fine."- Away-Caterpillar-176
"NTA."
"I mean I own a 9-month-old dog and live in an apartment, BUT I care about my neighbors so I do my best to prevent the barking any time, especially early in the morning or in the evening."
"Complaining doesn't mean not being tolerant, especially if this dog's behavior happens on a daily basis."- Gloriabi
"NTA."
"Can't quite figure out all the YTA comments unless they love hearing dogs barking at 6:00 AM when they're awake but most others are sleeping."
"Sh*t I can't stand hearing dogs barking for no reason any time."- USAR1981
Others, however, had trouble sympathizing with the OP, feeling she was unnecessarily harsh towards her neighbors and was ignoring the basic understanding of living in an apartment, and had trouble accepting her confusion at being so put off by the icy response she got from her neighbors following the confrontation:
"YTA."
"It isn’t his fault you were up so late."- lmchatterbox
"YTA for screaming at someone."
"Are you expecting someone to get rid of their baby when it’s crying throughout the night?"
"You could have handled it kinder."
"This is part of shared living spaces."- juiceyputa
"YTA."
"For seemingly wanting them to be friendly to you after everything."
"Also not their fault you were up late."
"Trainers cost a lot of money, maybe they were working on saving up the money."- Lunar-Eclipse0204
"You screamed at your neighbor so intensely that another uninvolved neighbor talked to you about it."
"That doesn’t necessarily make you the a**hole, there is always more to it, but it does say that your response was a lot."
"It may have been deserved, they might have been super selfish or careless about your needs."
"Or the dog may have been an issue for them too."
"They may have been trying to afford a trainer in a sh*tty economy and you were just another layer to this situation."
"Maybe YTA, maybe they are, maybe you both are, but you definitely made it known to everyone that you were upset."
"However, now that your problem got solved, you want them to be friendly like you haven’t been at odds for months?"
"If you don’t like them, move on. If you do, then you should probably talk."
"But expecting people you yelled at so badly that your another neighbor insinuated that YTA, and then wanting them to be neighbor friendly and smile at you warmly without any civil discussion in between is a bonkers expectation."
"That expectation makes YTA."- Prestigious_Clock617
Then there were those who didn't think either the OP or her neighbor came off looking particularly good, feeling they both could have made more of an effort to find middle ground:
"ESH."
"He should’ve considered the barking before adopting the dog, but you should’ve approached it better."
"Beagles are known to be barky dogs and not great for shared living."
"That’s on him."
"That said, you should have been solution-focused from the start and tried to work with your neighbor to get the barking under control."
"You say you 'complained' to him."
"Most people don’t take kindly to complaints."
"You should’ve said, 'Congratulations on the new puppy! I want to talk about the barking, though, and see if we can come up with a way to reduce it together, especially the 6am barks. Is there a way to work together on this?'”
"That way it sounds less like you’re confronting him and more like you’re trying to make it work."- HiddenPenguinsInCars
If there is one downside to apartment living, it's sharing hallways, and more importantly, walls with your neighbors.
That being said, people should make an effort to make sure no one, dogs included, is disrupting their neighbors, as having a sleepy or grumpy neighbor isn't likely to create a happy living situation for anyone.
Perhaps the OP should weigh her options.
