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Parent Gets Daughter Personalized School Supplies So Teacher Doesn’t ‘Redistribute’ Them To Rest Of Class


It’s that time of year again… SCHOOL BEGINS!!

Time to start getting back to bed early, making new memories and getting supplies for class.

The school supply list should be an easy part of the new year process.

But it rarely ever is.

Teachers and schools never seem to be on the same page with parents when shopping begins.

Case in point...

Redditor Bluecarrot002 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback. So naturally, they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.

They asked:

“AITA for buying personalized stationery for my daughter so it can’t be redistributed in class?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“My little girl, Mia (F[emale] 9) has started a new school recently.”

“We moved recently and she had to start new school.”

“I got a list of supplies that the teacher required, plus extras like extra packs of crayons, etc.”

“You know the deal.”

“While I don’t necessarily agree with this, it’s not a hill I, willing to die on so I got everything on that list.”

“However, I also got my child her own supplies.”

“Now, the list didn’t say to not label them.”

“Mia is very particular on what type of stationery she likes.”

“I’ve heard horror stories of kids stuff being redistrubuted and then them ending up with crappy supplies.”

“So I sat down with Mia and we got her personalised binders and notebooks and pencils with her name on Etsy.”

“It’s all part of the item list so it can’t be removed and given to another kid (like I said, as requested, I bought extra binders, etc.).”

“It turns out that I was right to do so.”

“When Mia got home, she brought a passive aggressive note from the teacher about Mia’s supplies.”

“Apparently, she tried to gather all supplies and have kids pick another one.”

“She requested that I switch Mia’s supplies to generic ones which I’m refusing to do.”

“The teacher now requested that I stop by to have a chat regarding Mia’s supplies.”

“I posted in local Facebook group and parents are divided.”

“So I need another opinion before I go meet with Mia’s teacher.”

“Am I the a**hole for buying my child personalized stationery so it cannot be taken away from her?”

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA?:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.

Let’s hear some thoughts…

“NTA. I hated this as a kid.”

“My parents would buy Crayola and I would some how get the dollar tree brand.”

“Enough parents complained.”

“Like I’m sorry Susan’s parents bought the dollar tree brand but my parents got me this and that’s what I want to use.” ~ jadepumpkin1984

“Exactly. Also teaching kids that life is fair and everyone gets the same thing seems silly.”

“Life isn’t fair.”

“Some kids gets crayola some kids get dollar store. Tough poop.” ~ nicepeoplemakemecry

“My parents were just getting by and did without a lot for themselves to save what they could told college.”

‘So while I did have the inexpensive supplies, they were in the colors, style etc, I picked out.”

‘It would have been very distressing to have the supplies my parents worked hard for taken away even if I received more expensive items.”

“As long as parents purchase extra supplies for those that need them this doesn’t make sense to me.”

‘The only thing I can remember being collected was the art paper because it needed to be stored flat anyway. ETA… NTA.”  ~ blueheronflight

“I had to send my youngest son to kindergarten with used supplies.”

“They were good quality, but it was scrounged from the older kids supplies.”

“And stuff I bought when times weren’t so lean.”

“I did buy the tissue and hand sanitizer new, because I figured those were for the classroom.”

“But I had NO idea that they were going to take his stuff and give it to other kids.”

“The teacher sent it ALL back home with a note explaining the situation.”

‘My son was embarrassed, as was I.”

“It’s f**king humiliating to point out what kids do and don’t have with stunts like that.” ~ Diasies_inMyHair

“This is a perfect example of why the ‘pool and redistribute thing is so ridiculous.”

“Your son should have theoretically been the one who benefitted from the redistribution.”

“And instead he and you were shamed much more so than he would have been if he had just put his supplies in his desk and gone about his day.”

“Plus it’s wasteful to throw out supplies that are gently used.”

“Reusing them and only purchasing new when they are needed makes much more sense for numerous reasons.”  ~ Artistic-Baseball-81

“My mom always bought extra supplies that were nice.”

“We did redistribute supplies, just had extras for other kids.”

“In general, most parents that bought extras, bought the same stuff their kids got too.”

“The kids that needed it, didn’t have to ask, just went to the supply drawer, and most still got the good supplies.”

“Making it a public spectacle only humiliates kids that need supplies.”  ~ chemchick27

“My niece’s teacher was awful about this.”

“Niece (3rd grade) is huge into art.”

“My brother went and bought her whatever size pack the teacher specified of Crayola crayons.”

“But also bought her the box of ‘colors of the world skin tones’ that they make for drawing people.”

“The teacher immediately sent the skin tone colors home and had an issue with them being inappropriate for some reason.”

“I’d like to know how it’s offensive to be able to draw people in a shade other than ‘peach’ or ‘coffee,’ but I digress.”

“She made such a big deal out of it (taking them away twice, sending multiple emails), that my brother finally gave up and told my niece ‘Sorry. I guess everyone you draw will just have to be blue or green for this teachers assignments.'”

“Then, once the offensive set was safely banned from school, the normal Crayola pack of colors my niece brought got thrown in the pile for redistribution.”

“My niece ended up with a dollar store brand pack of crayons.”

“And the pack of markers she got had been previously opened, so the majority of them were completely dried out.”

“So her dad had to buy her another new set of those and sneak them into class, since the ones she received in weren’t usable.”

“It’s such a stupid system.”

“And especially irritating when the teacher is more interested in appearing fair on a surface level, but won’t bother ensuring all of the supplies actually function.”  ~ butt_butt_butt_butt_

“My kids school doesn’t do this.”

“So I don’t have first hand experience but from what I understand it is done to make share all kids have equal amounts of supplies.”

“So, each kid will get a pack of crayons, pencils, a binder, etc.”

“But it is pooled together and then distributed.”

“Say student A’s mom buys high level pencil Crayons, student B’s mom buys mid-level and student C’s buys Dollar Tree quality.”

“Instead of each child having what they brought, it ends up random and student C could end up we with the high quality supplies and student A the cheap ones, which is obviously frustrating to some parents.”

“OP, NTA, I think the way you did it is best.”

“You provided the requested communal supplies and made sure Mia got what she needed.” ~ Agitated_Pin2169

“NTA. I was the poor kid in school who needed help with supplies.”

“Luckily the teacher usually just had extras on hand but didn’t make kids redistribute their supplies.”

“I won’t lie.”

“I would envy some of the nicer supplies but I understood that their parents bought those for them and I wasn’t entitled to it.”

“I’m all for helping out underprivileged kids with supplies.”

“But I don’t think the onus should fall onto other parents (or teachers).”

“It’s complicated, yes, but the way it’s being dealt with in schools isn’t benefiting the kids, just relieving the teachers mind on the matter.”

“I’m not going to go into all the politics but the reality is that is where it should be resolved instead of punishing or pointing fingers at each other.” ~ HereOnCompanyTime

“NTA- you bought extra as requested and then personalized for your daughter.”

“I don’t know what the teacher has a problem with.”

“She purposefully didn’t mention that she was gonna switch up the kids supplies and is mad you foiled her plans??”

“Then what are the extras for?”  ~ vix682

“NTA – I love my own stationery.”

“Explain to said teachers those are her personal stationery items.”

“You contributed so there is sufficient for everyone.”

“I would suggest a pencil case and your daughter brings them home each night.”

“I would suggest the teacher does not want responsibility of those items going missing etc, so it will be up to your daughter to look after them.” ~ MumSquared

“This. If you brought enough supplies to distribute, why do they have a problem with Mia having her own supplies?”

“My kids like to pick out their own school supplies and have certain likes and dislikes when it comes to notebooks and writing utensils.”

“Good Luck and NTA.” ~ Old_Ad_1558

Well OP, Reddit seems to understand your reasons clearly.

Hopefully when you sit down with the teacher you both can come to a mutually beneficial understanding.

Happy School Year!