There are numerous steps to being a good roommate.
Up to and including keeping all shared living spaces clean, paying your share of the rent on time, and being mindful of noise levels when your roommates are sleeping or need to work.
So it would seem fair to say that someone has every right to find a new place to live, should a living situation stop being harmonious between roommates.
A significant change in their living situation resulted in Redditor depressoespresso13 immediately looking for a new place to live.
And their roommates were not at all pleased when they shared this news with them, concerned over the increase in their rent and expenses.
Worried that they might have been unreasonable, the original poster (OP), took to the subReddit “Would I Be The A**hole” (WIBTA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“WIBTA if I moved out because my roommate is pregnant?”
The OP shared that a major new development with one of their roommates resulted in their beginning to look for a new home, much to the disappointment of their roommates.
“I do not like kids, at all.”
“However I support all my friends that want kids and will be part of those kids lives to help my friends.”
“Here’s the issue:”
“I moved into a new place with some of my friends about 2 months ago and recently one of them said she was pregnant and does not know who the father is.”
“I’m not judging her, we all love one night stands, and sometimes things happen.”
“However I do not want to live with a kid, much less a newborn, and she can’t afford to live anywhere else.”
“We split the rent between the three of us so if I moved out I know that they wouldn’t be able to afford the place on their own.”
‘I spoke to my landlord and he agreed to let me off of the rent contract.”
“However, we right now pay about $750 each and I know if I moved out it would go up to about $1100 for the both of them.”
“I told them I don’t want to live with a new baby and want to move out, and they’re calling me an a**hole because my friends won’t be able to pay rent without me there and that moving out while my other friend now has to pay expenses for hospital visits, baby stuff and all that comes along with it she’s going to be very tight for money even at the $750.”
“I thought about subletting my room however no one wants to live with a new infant.”
“Of course the baby won’t be here for another 9 months so I have time to think and plan however I’m really set on leaving if she’s staying.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this Particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not the A**hole
- YTA – You’re the A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everybody Sucks Here
The Reddit community agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for wanting to move out.
Everyone agreed that the OP had every right to move out whenever they wanted, no matter the circumstance, and that the rent increase was not their concern.
“They can find a different roommate.”
“Someone will need the place, and maybe enjoy kids.”
“But this is not your problem: it’s her problem.”
“You signed a lease based on certain specific truths, like the one where there’s no baby in the flat.”
“That term has changed, so you can choose to not agree to the new terms.”
“They have options, you have options.”
“Absolutely feel free to leave.”
“You’re not a jerk.”-Apotheuncary.
“How did it become your responsibility to keep the rent low for two grown adults?”-Frequent_Ad4701.
“This is only going to get worse as time goes on.”
“Get the f*ck out.”- Real_Recognition_713.
“It’s not your problem that now she’ll have other expenses.”
‘It’s not your problem to make sure they can afford rent.”
“I truly don’t understand how anyone could expect someone else to live with an infant when they don’t want to.”
“It’d be nice of you to help find a replacement, but that’s also not really your problem either.”
“Kids can be great, sure, but these are the consequences of having kids.”
“She’ll have to figure it out eventually.”-Head-Wrap7430.
“NTA you didn’t sign up to live with a baby.”
“It’s selfish of them to just expect you to.”
“Not your baby, not your problem.”
“They can find someone else to take your place or they can find a smaller more affordable place.”-Jolly-Asparagus-8360.
“You are not intentionally screwing them over, you simply did not sign up to live with a newborn.”
“I wouldn’t either. It’s not your responsibility to help your friend pay for anything baby-related.”
“She’s choosing to have the child so this is what she has to do.”
“It’s also not your responsibility to keep the rent low for 2 other adults.”
“What if you had to move out for any other reason- change in job location, illness, injury, etc.?”
“You’d have to do what was best for you then too and they would have to deal, like they have to deal now.”
“It kind of sounds like they’re more upset that you’re not on board with the baby and everything that entails.”- DorothyZbornaksArmy.
“Babies are loud and a lot of work.”
“It’s okay not to like them.”-oneeyecheeselord.
“You did not sign up to live with an infant.”
“It sounds like the roommate decided to keep her pregnancy secret until after the lease was signed.”
“No one has 9 months to figure out anything.”
“It’s also not your responsibility to support another adult.”-Flat_Contribution707.
“NTA: It’s not your responsibility to be your friends’ financial cushion and live in an undesirable living situation, especially for someone that is choosing to bring a child into the world when they can’t afford to live without two roommates.”
“If you don’t want to live with a kid, you shouldn’t have to.”
“The two remaining roommates need to sit down, figure out their finances, and find a new roommate.”
“Run before this becomes a free childcare situation.”-dvnfmnn-blackberry.
“Move out ASAP.”
“Also if you stay you will be guilted to help out with the baby.”
“And if she can’t afford things now, she won’t be able to afford things after the baby is born.”-Jolteon2020.
“Your roommate needs to get herself better prepared to deal with her life decisions.”
“You didn’t sign the lease knowing a baby was a part of the deal.”
“And don’t look back.”- roxywalker.
“I’m sorry they will be inconvenienced but it is a HUGE imposition to be living with a newborn and even apart from the noise and smells, you will get roped into helping care for the baby.”
“‘Please can you hold her while I get a quick shower/eat?'”
“‘I just got settled to nurse the baby, can you please bring me [thing]?” etc.”
“It’ll be death by a thousand cuts.”- mypreciousssssssss.
“They have 8 months to find another renter.”- damnshell.
“Literally none of this is your problem.”- SimplySam4210.
“Pregnant lady here.”
“You are absolutely NTA.”
“It is not your job to help your friend with her baby and all of the financial responsibilities that come with it, or feel guilty about it.”
“She got pregnant, not you.”
“You do not have children, so why would they expect you to be okay with living with a frickin’ newborn?”
“Seriously, the audacity of some pregnant women is fucking amazing.”
“You’re not trying to screw over your friend.”
“So do what is best for you.”-torrentialwx.
“It’s not your child.”-mickeys_stepdad.
“She’s probably upset about losing a potentially free babysitter.”-AccurateMeet8615.
“NTA and if your roommate can’t afford an extra $350/month how the hell is she gonna pay for a baby?”
“Sounds like her plan is to use you as free childcare/support.”
“Get out while you can.”- ladyorthetiger0.
“They can find a new roommate if they need too, but I wouldn’t want to be around a baby either.”
“The crying and all night will be terrible.”
“It’s not what you signed up for.”- Krakengreyjoy.
“NTA you should leave and you have given them a lot of notice.”
“You aren’t required to live there, even if your friends can’t afford to live elsewhere or without you.”
“It sounds like your pregnant friend really need to consider how to afford a child, maybe move to a different area.”-qwertysam5.
“You didn’t sign up for this and you’re not responsible for other adults.”-Tall1SF.
“The fact that she’s already trying to guilt you that she can’t afford things now because she hast to spend money for the baby should let you know that you’re doing the right thing.”
“Imagine when she’s heavily pregnant and demands you guys to do everything for her.”
“Or when the baby arrives and she’s overwhelmed and the apartment is a mess with a screaming baby.”
“Not to mention the lack of sleep that comes with a newborn.”
“Nope. Nope. Nope.”
“Maybe this will be a wake up call that she shouldn’t expect her friends to help subsidize her life because of her poor decisions.”- This_Hybrid_Moment.
The OP signed a lease to live with two other roommates, not three.
And while one can sympathize with the OP’s two other roommates, here’s hoping the one who is expecting a baby will soon realize that trying to raise a child with a roommate who hates children won’t be in anyone’s best interest.