It’s fair to say that there are some fundamental understandings of hygiene.
These include washing your hands after using the bathroom and covering your mouth when you cough.
However, when it comes to sharing things like food and makeup, no two people have the same views.
Some do so without a second thought, while others wouldn’t even begin to think of doing such a thing.
Redditor ThrowAwayFamilySuckx and their friends were recently getting ready for a fun night out.
When a friend of the original poster (OP)’s asked if she could use some of their makeup, the OP obliged.
However, the OP felt less inclined to use this makeup herself after their friend used it.
Something that did not go unnoticed by the OP’s friends, who all called them out for it.
Having some doubts about their behavior, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for not wanting to use my makeup that a friend with eczema used?”
The OP explained why she was less than inclined to use makeup that a friend of theirs had just used:
“I have a friend, Becky, who has severe eczema.”
“I don’t really care about it. We hang out, hug, and I know it’s not contagious.”
“Last week we were going out for a party and we went over another friend’s house to get dressed and dolled up.”
“We sometimes swap clothes, no big deal, but I don’t really let anyone use my makeup, not that I didn’t want to, but no one really asked me about it.”
“That day Becky asked if she could use my eyeshadow, I said Sure.”
“Then she asked to use my cake foundation.”
“It had a cushion applicator that you swipe/press on the cake to use.”
“I was caught off guard and just said yes, so she went to use it first.”
“Like I mentioned, I know it’s not contagious, but she had some open breakouts, and I was kinda grossed out using the applicator and cake itself, after she patted it on her face with open sores.”
“Like I know I’m not gonna get it, but I just can’t with the sore fluids and all that, I think it’s unhygienic.”
“Even if she patted it dry, I can’t help but feel grossed out.”
“If she didn’t have a breakout at the time, I most likely won’t care.”
“So I ended up not using foundation at all.”
“Only one friend asked me why, I didn’t really say why I just said I didn’t feel like it.”
“She made a big deal out of it, saying I was judgmental and a bully because Becky’s eczema grossed me out.”
“I explained that’s not true, and that it’s more of a hygiene thing.”
“Now they’re all upset at me for being prissy and should’ve just said not to use it.”
“Again, I was caught off guard.”
“I was never asked to borrow my makeup, and I never really say no when it comes to sharing anything, so I was on autopilot and said yes.”
“Now I feel like an AH, because I was grossed out by it.”
“I don’t care if it’s eczema or not, but I feel like I shouldn’t have to use someone that came in contact with anyone else’s open wounds or plasma.”
“I haven’t spoken with any of them since Friday.”
“AITA”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community firmly agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for not using makeup after Becky used it.
Everyone agreed that even Becky didn’t have eczema, sharing makeup was unhygienic, and the OP’s friends should not have ganged up on them like they did:
“Whether you are ‘judging’ her condition is irrelevant.”
“It IS unhygienic to share makeup applicators and makeup for the most part.”
“If she wanted to share makeup, you should use a single-use applicator and NEVER double dip.”
“Totally gross to double dip.”
“Also, going the other way, she is putting YOUR skin and bacteria on her open sores, not exactly smart.”
“NTA.”- Odd-End-1405
“NTA – I have eczema and I would never want to use someone else’s products in case they also had something in the makeup that would trigger a rash.”
“She should not be asking, and you should learn to say no.”
“You should not be sharing any makeup with anybody else, even if they don’t have skin issues.”- Unhappy-Prune-9914
“I’m guessing you are quite young bc anyone over the age of 13 should know not to share makeup applicators.”
“That’s f*cking disgusting even without the eczema.”
“Open sores make it extremely gross.”
“Your friends are idiots.”
“Don’t share any makeup with any of them ever again NTA.”- AnneShurely
“NTA.”
“That’s just gross.”
“Also as someone with eczema I can’t imagine putting makeup on top of a breakout, especially not with someone else’s applicators.”- Realistic-Pin-4617
“NTA.”
“Sharing makeup is a no-no in general, especially eye makeup, mascara, lip products.”
“It’s not just for you, but she’s putting all the gross stuff from your face onto hers as well.”- Guilty-Company-9755
“Even if she didn’t have eczema, sharing makeup is unhygienic with anyone.”
“If someone is willing to use a different applicator from you, then whatever, they’re taking on all the risk, but once they’ve put their germs in your makeup, they’re there.”
“NTA.”- realshockvaluecola
“NTA.”
“Next time, you can say you don’t share your makeup with anyone because it can cause problems for both the owner of the makeup and the person borrowing it.”
“Like bacteria or other things that do grow on cosmetics.”
“You are protecting everyone.”
“And follow through, don’t share.”
“It’s gross.”- EfficiencyForsaken96
“NTA.”
“I suffer from bad eczema myself.”
“While eczema, itself, is not contagious, people with eczema are more susceptible to infections for the very reason that we frequently have open wounds on our skin.”
“Plus, it’s not always easy to tell the difference between an infection and eczema.”
“This is on top of the fact that sharing makeup isn’t super hygienic to begin with.”
“The only thing to do differently in the future would be to say ‘no’ to her borrowing your makeup in the first place.”
“It’s possible that part of the reason your friend was so upset is because you essentially let her ruin your makeup.”
“She might not have borrowed it if she had known, and her guilt is manifesting as defensiveness.”
“But, you live and you learn.”- persephone-456
“NTA.”
“Just have the policy to not share makeup and stick to it!”- PositionParty1454
“NTA.”
“I have eczema, and I know it’s not contagious.”
“But whether you have it or not, never let anyone use your makeup regardless.”
“Open sores are bad enough, but there’s plenty of contagious stuff you can’t see.”
“You can be contagious for pinkeye before it blows up, or someone could have a herpes cold sore, etc.”
“Never let anyone use your makeup.”- emergencycat17
“NTA.”
“Sharing foundation is a horrible idea anyway, even if someone’s skin seems ‘clean’.”
“Big nope on that.”
“If you want to share, get a pump bottle and a cheap pack of makeup sponges (not beauty blenders, the old triangle kind) and do it that way.”
“We don’t share makeup, we SURE AS SH*T do not share mascara, eyeliner, lipstick/stain/gloss, or foundation.”
“Your friend likely felt really insecure about her face – I have eczema, I’ve had acne, I’ve had both flare up at once, I get it – and wanted to make you seem like a bad guy rather than acknowledge she doesn’t have the funds/availability to have her own makeup, and she has a medical condition that makes sharing a *particularly* bad idea.”
“BUT, sharing in general is a bad idea.”
“I don’t share with my daughter.”
“Don’t do it, you will wake up one day with a cold sore or eye stye and be like ‘WTF?!'”
” Please throw away any makeup she used, because of the open sores, and don’t put foundation or ANYTHING over open sores on your face, ever.”
“It’s not worth risking infection and a permanent scar.”
“Again, I’m sorry your friend has such a noticeable issue; it *sucks*.”
“But that doesn’t make it okay to bully your friends, nor does it excuse such a lack of self-awareness and hygiene.”- MucinexDM_MAX
“NTA.”
“I have eczema too, and I would NOT have borrowed your makeup with open sores.”
“That’s not hygienic. I wouldn’t share makeup in general, unless there’s a separate applicator or something.”- swampy-crocs
No doubt, Becky’s eczema probably makes her feel insecure frequently.
However, sharing makeup is always a sensitive subject, even when no skin conditions are involved.
Even though the OP’s friends said she should have just told Becky not to use it, you can’t help but wonder if that wouldn’t have resulted in the same reaction?