We all have different relationships with food.
Some people are lucky enough to like pretty much all foods, and even more enviably, can eat a surprisingly large amount without seeming to ever put on any weight.
Others however have to be much more careful, owing to allergies and issues with their digestion, or just simply don’t have particularly big appetites.
As a result, it is wise not to comment on the eating habits of others, unless you are explicitly concerned with their health and safety.
Redditor EveryVehicle1325 found herself very annoyed at a colleague over remarks they made regarding each of their eating habits.
Resulting in the original poster (OP) losing her temper with them fairly quickly.
Fearing that she may have overreacted, the original poster (OP) took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for telling someone it’s none of their business how much I eat?”
The OP explained why they did not take kindly when a colleague made an observation about their current diet.
“I (21 F[emale]) am a runner.”
“I usually workout 6x/wk and am training for a new half marathon personal record.”
“The workouts, along with walking a ton around college campus, gives me a huge appetite.”
“I also have to eat more since I am dealing with RED-S, aka not getting my period due to underfueling.”
“So I pack a good sized lunch, enough to keep me full, along with some snacks.”
“While eating outside today, a coworker came up to me and we began talking.”
“After a while, they look at my lunch and begin to make comments along the lines of ‘Wow! Quite an appetite!’ and ‘lots of snacks there!’.”
“I just kept to myself until they began to tell me how they usually don’t eat lunch/ need to.”
“Here, I just snapped and told them that it’s none of their business how much I eat, i don’t care that they starve themselves during lunch, to keep their comments away from my lunch table.”
“I quickly packed my things, leaving them at the table.”
“Now, I’m dreading seeing them because I feel I may have come off brash.”
“AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
While the Reddit community was somewhat divided as to where they believed the OP fell, just about everybody agreed that they were justified in being annoyed by the remarks made by their colleague.
Many felt that it was extremely rude of the OP’s colleagues to make any comments regarding their food and diet, even if some felt she could have chosen her words a little bit more carefully.
“NTA.”
“It was extremely rude of her to make comments about how much you eat and it is simply not needed.”- Cowboy_jesus1029
“NTA.”
“No one should be making comments about another person’s food intake or how many snacks they packed.”
“I found the part where they commented they don’t usually eat lunch or need rather snarky.”-SnazzySusieQ
“NTA.”
“Sometimes you just have to tell people to mind their business.”
“There are two important things adults need to learn how to do, brush your teeth twice a day and mind your business.”
“You are athletic and need the fuel.”
“Even if you didn’t though, it’s still none of their business.”
“You don’t owe them any explanation about your eating habits.”
“That person was TA.”- Nonchalant-Dickhead
“NTA.”
‘Like your edit said maybe you could have not been so harsh to your coworker.”
“But food is a sensitive subject for a lot of people.”
“What if you were trying to get over an eating disorder and that comment made you spiral back into it?”- SprayBottle25
“Best of luck.”
“Communication is key, making our feelings known in a calm manner and then if that doesn’t work.”
“Well elevate it as necessary.”
“There is so much misunderstandings in this world and it helps to try and see the conversation from 3 sides, yours, theirs, and neutral.”
“One of my fav movies Road house has a great line.”
“‘I want you to be nice….until its time….to not be nice’.”
“I replace nice with polite, even with people who don’t deserve politeness.”- RandomGuy_81
“NTA.”
“You could have been kinder in your delivery, but at the end of the day you are right, it is none of their business how much you eat.”- i_miss_ramen
“NTA.”
“That person was intrusive, judgy, and rude.”- rikkimit
“NTA.”
“They overstepped commenting on your eating.”
“You taught them a lesson.”
“Now forget it and act like nothing happen next time you see them.”- gastropodia42
“NTA.”
“It’s nobodies business how much you’re eating unless you’re under eating or showing signs of an eating disorder which you’re not.”
“Keep eating whatever you need to fuel your body.”- Due_Refrigerator_479
“NTA.”
“At all.”
“Nobody has the right to comment on what you put in your body.”
“Their behavior is rude and uncalled for.”
“That’s it.”
“Do not comment on someone else’s food choices.”
“It’s none of your business.”
“Plus you never know what someone’s eating disorder history is.”- Prudent_Border5060
“NTA.”
“Folks in general shouldn’t talk about other’s eating habits.”
“I take a medication that in addition to its intended function suppresses my appetite until it wears off.”
“I usually don’t eat at all during the day except for the occasional snack when I get an upset stomach.”
“I make it up at night and during the weekend.”
“Folks constantly talk about how little I eat.”
“Friends, family, coworkers, clients, random people.”
“For context I weigh ~190-200 LBS and around 5 ft 7inch.”
“I am not starving in the slightest and my doctor says it’s fine.”
“Hell it wouldn’t be bad to lose a few pounds.”
“Yet folks continue to feel the need to talk about it.”
“Mind your own business, folks. It is incredibly easy.”- TheCornal1
“NTA.”
“Food comments are NEVER okay.”
“Stop commenting on peoples consumption choices.”- stephissilly
“NTA.”
“Only a social clod comments on what others are eating, or not eating.”- Expert_Elderberry_17
“NTA.”
“Some people need to learn to mind their own fucking business, good job nipping that sh*t in the bud.”- EternalCharax
“Humans need to learn to shut up about what other humans are doing unless it actually causes harm to them or others.”
“Humans need to stop commenting on other humans bodies, appearance, food etc just shut the F up and mind ur own business.”
“NTA.”- Living-Celebration57
Others, however, felt that the OP’s reaction to their colleague’s comment was completely unwarranted, whether or not what their colleague said was appropriate.
“ESH in a mild hot sauce kind a way.”
“Coworker had no business commenting on your lunch if you guys aren’t friendly that way but you defiantly came out the gates red hot and swinging.”- Darth_Dronus
“NAH.”
“I see this as missed signals.”
“She was insensitive when she made comments about your food, but based on your update, she might just be awkward and trying to make conversation.”
“You got defensive, but rightly so.”
“Glad you two cleared it up.”- Fried-Fritters
“Gently, YTA.”
“I ran a marathon a few years ago and my appetite was through the roof.”
“Everyone made comments, but hey, I was running a marathon, and they weren’t.”
“I just laughed and changed the subject.”
“They’re not looking to bully you!”
“It’s just idle conversation and you should use it as an opening to talk about a particularly great run, or a funny story about scaring a deer or really anything.”
“You’re being much too sensitive, and I say that as someone who is hypersensitive herself!”- Straight-Singer-2912
Upon reading the comments from her fellow Redditors, the OP returned with an update, while also giving a bit more insight regarding her previous issues when it came to food and her diet.
“Thanks everyone for the quick responses! I’ve got a mix of YTA and NTA, so I went and explained to them that I am training and they told me that their comments weren’t meant to be taken as insults.”
“I apologized for my brashness.”
“I admit I am very sensitive, and today taught me I need to calm down and not take things so up the a** lmao.”
“I do have history with an eating disorder/disordered eating.”
“Hence why I snapped at her comments.”
“I am seeing someone to move past the ED and realize that others are not responsible for my triggers.”
“She acknowledged the not eating lunch comment was a bit too much, but I hope we can both learn from this experience!”
Sometimes when our minds are in a certain headspace, we can impulsively react to things.
Making it all the more understandable why the OP reacted the way she did to her colleague, even if they really didn’t mean any harm.
Hopefully, after receiving this help, the OP might be able to take a moment to think about her words next time someone makes a remark about what she’s eating.