In 2023, opinions surrounding the use of THC and CBD, whether recreationally or medicinally, are continuing to change.
People’s views of these are still inconsistent enough that it can be hard to judge when it would be acceptable to use these in public or not, agreed the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subReddit.
Redditor Away-Satisfaction660 was recently a plus-one invitation at a wedding, attending alongside his roommate, who was a bridesmaid, and he decided to take some THC gummies with him.
But when he was later accused of trying to ruin the evening, the Original Poster (OP) wondered if he had actually behaved poorly.
He asked the sub:
“AITA for taking a THC gummy at a Christian wedding?”
The OP recently attended a wedding as a plus-one guest.
“I (26 Male) was the plus-one for a wedding that my roomie (27 Female) was in as a bridesmaid.”
“I had previously met the couple (Male and Female 28) a few times, and they seemed fine.”
The OP decided to bring something with him to the wedding reception.
“I brought a pack of five-milligram gummies that I would take during the reception, and my roomie knew I was bringing them.”
“The wedding was small, with about 60 people. I knew going in that not everyone was allowed plus-one guests, but my roomie was as she was in the bridal party.”
“The ceremony was nice, and when we moved to the reception, I was seated with three bridesmaids and two of the bride’s college friends (20s Male and Female couple).”
“The wedding party left for pics and some food was brought out, so I took a gummy.”
“I offered some to the couple I was left with, and they politely declined, and I figured that was the end of that.”
News of what the OP had done started to spread around the wedding.
“Some time passed and the wedding party returned. Right away, the couple engaged in hushed conversation with the bridesmaid sitting opposite me. I couldn’t hear them over the music.”
“The couple’s vibe changed, and while we were talking at a table, they would start responding to things I was saying with, ‘Oh, I wonder what other fun things you’re taking,’ and ‘Don’t let the kids here see you’re doing that,’ in snarky-ish tones.”
“I became uncomfortable, so I excused myself and stepped out onto the patio.”
“Soon after, my roomie stepped out and joined me. She informed me that the table started talking about me when I left, and the couple was appalled to find out I brought gummies to the reception.”
“They expressed their distaste for drugs that aren’t ‘FDA approved,’ and they are also apparently Christian, which became clear when they stated that ‘this was a Christian wedding and I should be more respectful in not bringing ‘addictive drugs’ around a celebration with kids present.'”
“My roomie thought they were overreacting, but the other bridesmaids agreed with them and debated kicking me out.”
“I was embarrassed and didn’t realize I would cause such a reaction, as they had an open bar, and plenty of the people were already buzzed, that couple included.”
The OP attempted to repair the situation.
“We returned, and I apologized and tried to explain that the gummies are legal and not addictive like alcohol or other drugs.”
“The man seemed to think that was a jab at him, as he was already pretty drunk. He interrupted me and said, ‘You don’t get to tell others how much they can drink at a wedding, especially when you’re a plus-one, and we were actually invited.'”
“The convo died, and we were dismissed for dinner. I could hear that couple a few people behind us in line for the buffet still talking about it and including others in the convo.”
The OP didn’t want to be a plus-one anymore.
“At that point, I felt unwelcome and told my roomie I was just going to wait in the car outside.”
“She opposed that, but I told her I’d be fine and left. I stayed in the car for three hours.”
“When my roomie finally came out, she told me that when the bride heard about this, she didn’t personally care but said I absolutely shouldn’t have brought edibles, as many of the attendees were Christians and equated weed to meth or cocaine.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some Redditors reassured the OP that he was NTA and the wedding was behind the times.
“NTA. SOME Christians are always looking for a target anywhere they go. If it weren’t you, it would have been some poor teen that came out or the uncle who’s an atheist. You were an easy target.”
“There is no need for any of the people you offered gummies to gossip about you or be rude about it. Was it in poor taste to offer the gummies? Likely. But their own behavior (drinking AND gossiping) violates their own stated moral foundation, and that’s far worse.” – Jkfrvrjking
“I’ve never been to a wedding or party when someone DIDN’T offer me THC. It’s legal in my country, but even before it was, it wasn’t very secretive. So, my friend, you are NTA, and the rest of the pearl-clutchers can get bent (on booze).” – harceps
“NTA, especially in a legal state. These people need to get over themselves. It’s legal in half the country. And alcohol was being served, so it’s not like it was a straight-edge wedding.”
“You sound nice and fun. They were super rude to make you feel unwelcome.” – RaisinToastie
“He didn’t know the crowd and thought he was being polite.”
“It didn’t land well, but does that make him the AH? In my opinion, the a**holes are the people who decided to distract the bride and groom with this nonsense instead of saying, ‘Hey, thanks but no thanks, and don’t let the bride and groom catch you, as they don’t get down like that.'”
“Simple solution. Talk s**t about it after the wedding, so it didn’t cause a big thing! OP is NTA.” – Confident_Key_692
“Maybe I’m out of touch here as a Canadian, but people need to get over their problems with weed.”
“OP was a little naive to offer them any, but I don’t even think it warrants an ESH or YTA here. It sounds like the crowd just sucked.”
“I feel bad for OP and honestly NTA. I’m Christian if it makes a difference.” – dontshootthemsngr
Others thought it was inappropriate at a wedding, let alone offering to share.
“All the NTA/ESH ‘It’s legal, mannnn,’ responses are getting me. Like, sure, it might be legal. But like, depending on where OP is, it’s only recently (within a few years) legal, and it still has a heavy stigma in a lot of groups, even now I wouldn’t use it in front of strangers without knowing their comfort level around the drug (yes, even if they’re drinking alcohol, which is wOrSe ThAn wEeD).”
“You are a PLUS ONE at some stranger’s WEDDING breaking them out and offering them WHILE SEATED WITH THE BRIDAL PARTY.”
“At the end of the day, if you want to take a gummy at a stranger’s wedding, knock yourself out. We’ve all been a little ‘elated’ in inappropriate situations before. Maybe you play it off, and nobody knows. Maybe you don’t and look like a jerk in front of everyone.”
“Where OP REALLY went wrong here was offering it to others. No idea why OP didn’t expect this could be a possible outcome, lol (laughing out loud).” – -generatedname-2456
“NTA, especially in a legal state/country.”
“BUT in a situation like a wedding, you gotta read the room. Popping the gummy is fine, definitely makes the reception better, but for the love of God, don’t offer one to some rando. People have strong (read: misguided) opinions on weed, and sometimes it’s just better to keep that on the DL (down-low).” – lazy-lion12
“As someone who smokes heavily and does edibles occasionally, YTA.”
“You barely know these people, and you’re a plus-one. Why would you bring gummies to eat at the event, and then offer them to strangers around you? If you’re gonna be taking that stuff, you do it before you go or when you’re alone. Or, if you barely know these people, don’t take them at all.”
“It doesn’t matter if it’s legal. If someone had an alcohol-free wedding, you’d be just as much an AH for bringing alcohol to drink and offer to others. While yeah, I do think they overreacted a bit, bringing the gummies to the wedding with you was unnecessary.” – shroomride88
“YTA. Unless the couple getting married openly encourages it at the wedding itself, you don’t bring drugs to a wedding. Offering to share only increased the level of inappropriateness.”
“Doing it when you’re a plus-one and have hardly met the couple is in especially poor taste, because you don’t even know the couple well enough to know whether they’d be comfortable around edibles at all, much less comfortable having them at their wedding.” – KaliTheBlaze
“Seriously, it isn’t totally fair or correct, but it is the way it is. YTA, but softly.”
“That is a low-dose gummy that isn’t going to do anything except make an awkward evening more tolerable. The people drinking will get far more gone, yet it is socially acceptable for that to occur. I am with you on your logic and on taking the gummy. No wrong here.”
“Your faux pas comes in offering the gummies to others. Especially as a formal event such as a wedding. Edibles or weed are NOT nearly as socially acceptable. You can’t offer to others randomly around you as you never know people’s perceptions and feelings toward it.”
“Also, a wedding where you are a one-time presence in all these people’s lives is NOT the time to go into educator or activist mode. You aren’t changing hearts and minds. You are just the ‘druggie’ who showed up and made it clear that you intended to get wrecked (in their point of view).”
“Next time, take your dose quietly. Don’t offer to others, and you’ll be fine. I am going on the assumption that you know yourself and your doses and won’t make a fool of yourself at a formal event at which you are a guest.” – Duffarum
After receiving feedback, the OP shared a brief update.
“Thanks for the feedback. Overall, lesson learned, lol (laughing out loud). I’m not going to sweat it, though, since they were pretty catty, and I’ll never see any of them again.”
The subReddit didn’t see any particular issue with the OP taking a THC gummy during the event, though they would have cautioned him to do it discreetly. Where they took issue was in the offering of the gummies to other guests, who he was not on a personal basis with.
Not only did he create an accidentally awkward situation for fellow guests, but he may have impacted their view of one of the bridesmaids by being her plus-one and by association, the bride herself.