Everyone wants to be present at people’s weddings.
And lately at many events in life, to ensure this, people have been asked to relinquish or stay off their cellphones.
This way, the focus stays where it should.
But life will intervene, and that may be a more difficult request than originally planned.
Case in point…
Redditor Low_Top_9726 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback. So naturally, they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
They asked:
“AITA for going on my phone for an emergency at my best friend’s wedding?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My best friend since childhood got married last weekend.”
“She had an unplugged wedding; an unplugged wedding is where you don’t go on your phone at all.”
“I totally respect that and might even do it for my future wedding.”
“The entire morning of her wedding was beautiful, and the ceremony was unforgettable.”
“When the reception began, my sister called me.”
“I didn’t answer but was confused as to why she was calling me because I told my family not to contact me since it was no phones.”
“She blew my phone up, sending me around 70 calls.”
“It got to the point where I had to answer.”
“My best friend is usually understanding so I thought she would be okay with this. My sister told me my mom was in an accident.”
“She’s okay, by the way, only a concussion.”
“Someone saw me on the phone and told my best friend.”
“I went to go find my best friend to tell her I had to leave and she yelled at me for being on my phone.”
“I explained the situation to her, and she told me that wasn’t an excuse and I could have waited till after the wedding.”
“I left immediately, not only because of her stupidity but because I also had to go to the hospital.”
“She’s texted me and cussed me out, telling me that it wasn’t that hard to not be on my phone.”
“A few of our friends and her husband also called me names.”
“My family is saying I’m not the a-hole but I can’t help but feel bad.”
“I also don’t think this is worth losing a lifelong friendship.”
“She was like a sister to me.”
“Also, for context, I was not a bridesmaid.”
“She didn’t have any bridesmaids.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“So AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA. You were right to answer your sister’s calls about your mom’s accident. That’s definitely an emergency situation.”
“It’s a bummer that your friend didn’t understand and got upset, even after you explained it.”
“Maybe give it a little time for everyone to cool off, then try having a talk with her about what happened.”
“It’s hard when a long-time friendship hits a bump like this, but honest talks can sometimes clear the air.”
“Just take care of yourself, too; dealing with family emergencies and friend drama at the same time is no joke.” ~ XoXoXanadu
“You did nothing wrong.”
“You know best if that kind of phone blow-up means an emergency or that your sister thought she saw Taylor Swift.”
“Weddings can show you the depths of selflessness in friends you thought the world of.”
“Hopefully the relationship can be salvaged if that’s what you want, when she’s no longer the queen of everything.”
“But you have nothing to apologize for, and doing so might be a bad precedent to set for the power balance of that friendship.” ~ Bluefoot44
“What kind of friend would start yelling and cussing you out, though?”
“At her wedding, no less.”
“And then her husband and others calling you names?”
“Doesn’t sound like any of these people know what respect means.”
“Or self-respect, for that matter.”
“Definitely NTA, and do you need this petty drama in your life even after they knew your mom was in an accident?” ~ MichiTheMouse
“So NTA. Why do brides think that every edict must be followed despite extenuating circumstances?”
“(I used to be a wedding photographer… this drama moment doesn’t surprise me at all).”
“You were right to answer your sister.”
“No one calls that much unless there is an emergency. (glad she’s ok).” ~ PW1408
“I had two friends call me the morning of my wedding.”
“Their little girl likely had a small UTI, and the only time they could see a doctor was the exact time of my ceremony.”
“I told them not to worry about us and to take care of their little one.”
“It’s not hard to be a nice bride, even with the crazy amount of stuff to do for a wedding.”
“OP IS NTA, BUT THE BRIDE SURE IS!” ~ InstanceQuirky
“NTA first off… it’s usually unplugged CEREMONIES.”
“Not through the entire reception.”
“You said the ceremony was unforgettable and noticed the calls at the reception.”
“Which means you didn’t answer or even look at your phone during the ceremony.”
“Therefore NTA. An unplugged ceremony, yes… an entire wedding, no.”
“There are probably a bunch of parents who left kids at home with a relative or babysitter- what if a kid had an emergency… would she flip out?” ~ Slow-Company-7711
“Seriously, WTH?”
“Unless OP was actually supposed to be doing something, like emcee, singing the first dance song, doing one of those bridal party ‘dances,’ why couldn’t they use their phone? During the reception?”
“I get wanting people not to be obsessed over their phones like a lot of folks are today.”
“I’m sitting in a room right now where I haven’t talked to the other occupant for hours as they scroll TikTok.”
“I’ve had Thanksgiving with people who won’t take their Bluetooth out of their ear.”
“And these aren’t even young people.”
“But people have other friends/families/obligations outside of this wedding.”
“And emergencies happen.”
“And a concussion can be serious.”
“It is an emergency. It’s not a sprained ankle.”
“NTA and I, if I were OP, I’d let them be mad ’cause I wouldn’t want such callous, unfeeling people in my life.” ~ Aviendha13
“Yup, concussions are still a traumatic brain injury, and I have had friends who experienced debilitating symptoms that lasted a year or more during recovery.”
“For all OP knew when hearing her mum was in a car accident and in the hospital, her mum could be near death.”
“Absolutely NTA.” ~ RosieAU93
“And at the time, the exact injury was likely to be determined.”
“Anyone can have a stroke, skull fracture, intracranial hemorrhage, etc. a head injury might need Tylenol.”
“It might need brain surgery.”
“If I missed that many calls, I would be freaking the f**k out until I could talk to sister. NTA.” ~ GloomyFlamingo2261
“Yeah, the bride is bat crap crazy for insisting on an unplugged reception, too.”
“The whole point of unplugged is to be in the moment and not distracted during the ceremony, the actual marriage part.”
“The reception is just an excuse to party afterward and not really necessary when you think of what a wedding is actually about. NTA.” ~ Environmental_Art591
“NTA. Your mom was in an accident — you went to the hospital.”
“Your friend is not the center of the universe. And you didn’t disrupt her wedding from what you describe.”
“You want to save the friendship you say: So you’re sorry you had to leave/handle a family emergency, but it was necessary. That’s it.”
“And maybe downgrade your friendship a little — your boyfriend lacks empathy and is self-involved.” ~ midwestyellowmoon
OP came back to chat…
“Just to clear a few things up because if I see one more comment saying I should’ve gone somewhere more secret, I might lose it, lol.”
“I went to the parking lot.”
“I tried the bathroom, but a few people were in there.”
“The parking lot was empty.”
“Also, this is not the first time my best friend has been shi**y.”
“There have been other situations where she was the A-hole.”
“Like when I couldn’t hang out because my sister was having a baby and wanted me there.”
“She isn’t very considerate when it comes to medical issues if you can’t tell.”
“Her honeymoon ends on Sunday, so I’ll message her then.”
“I’ll definitely be removing the best part in best friend from now on.”
“So I messaged her yesterday asking if we can talk.”
“She said she doesn’t want to meet in person because ‘I might just up and leave if another one of my family members gets hurt.'”
“I asked if we could talk on the phone, and she said yes.”
“I basically told her the entire story and my point of view.”
“She told me I still was the A-hole and I wouldn’t be invited to future events.”
“She told me the reason she was so upset was because I stole her attention and light on her day.”
“She acted like I planned this and planned for my mom to get into an accident to steal her shine??”
“I basically told her that her point of view is f**ked up and self-centered.”
“This incident has just made me realize how bad of a friend she actually is.”
“I told her to not contact me and that we weren’t friends anymore.”
“I also asked her who tattled on me when I was on the phone, and it was her mom.”
“Her mom has always been the mom that doesn’t like you.”
“She always treated me badly, so I’m not shocked.”
“She’s tried changing her number and reaching out to me this morning, but I told her to stop trying to contact me, or I’ll get the police involved.”
“I also changed my number so none of her family and friends can contact me.”
Well, OP, Reddit is with you. You had an emergency.
What if it had been worse and you missed out on saying farewell to your mom?
Sometimes, friendships just run their course.